Sexual Orientation

[haiderodes]

In speaking of coming out...

 

I guess im out...I dunno really. lol. I mean i dont really walk around and say "hey im gay".

 

Most of my friends know. I haven't really needed to go through any drama yet, because most people claim they already knew so everyone is cool with it.

 

The family is the hard part. I assume they suspect it, but they have never said anything, but if they ever asked i would definately not lie. i act the same around everyone so i dont consider it "hiding".

 

I have been having a lot of dreams about family members asking me about it though.

[BiCoastal Kid]

Congratulations. So where am I impressed?

 

^^There always has to be someone making the occasional "smart" remark...tisk, tisk!

 

I'm just saying, the last few pages of thisn thread have, in short, been:

 

OMG UR GAY

LOLz IDK

YA U R

IDK YA MAYB

LOLz INDECISION

LOLZ I LIKE GUYS AGAIN

LOL SO DO I

DUH

LOL

LOLz

lolZ

HA

hahaha

LYKOMG COMING OUT

OH MANz

HA

TOTALLY

YOU KNO MINES ALREADY! BUT LYK UPDATEZ!

 

 

 

Atleast, that's how it read to me.

I'm in a cynical mood the past couple months.

[Hurricane]

Well... I did something VERY hard today... I decided i'd come clean with my freinds at school today, all of them took it very well, except 2, but that shows who my real freinds are... It was so hard to do that I almost cried, but now i think about it, i'm glad i decided to come out as it makes school alot less hard having to hide it from my freinds.

[mmousefan]

^ glad to hear you are OK. I really thing thats a hard thing to do. But it always good to know who are yoir real friends

[Primogen18]

/\ good for you man, I know it's hard. I lost 2 of my friends and a cousin coming out, and I did cry for a little, but you get over it before you know it since your real friends are always there. I was there with my ex's parents who weren't too thrilled with his orientation, and helped him through that, and now having to deal with losing him as well. Good luck though, really. I know stuff like that hurts, my present situation is really waring me down (being dumped/breaking up), but I know I just have to move on and pick myself up the same way I did when I lost my friends (of course it's a little bigger considering I was with him for over a year and things were complicated, but it basically works the same in getting over things) Sorry I went on for a bit, just glad you decided to come "clean" and I know what you're going through. I came on here to distract myself and participate and meet people, and this place is pretty fun so far.

[TatsuXtreme]

im straight.------

[coasterrider1998]

I'm Straight even though I may do gay acting things (drawing and art) but those things help me a lot. They help me get girls. (Sometimes)

 

Also...Jenna Jameson is my hero!

[SonOfBeastSucks]

im straight.------

It appears that you are straight as an arrow.

[coasters 4 me]

I know I have posted here before, but I cant remember what I have said.

 

I have to say I am Bi. Although, I don't really want to tell people that, because there doesnt seem to be that many people in Ireland that are Bi/Gay, and I am getting the feeling that an awful lot of people will not like me for it. We, I suppose that is the hardest part about being Bi/Gay. Well, I will see what the next few years will bring.

[Blazen_AZN]

because there doesnt seem to be that many people in Ireland that are Bi/Gay

 

Conserding its not a choice, there are probably just as many gay/bi ppl in ireland then there is anywhere else. Them being out is a different story...

 

 

Sorry about telling all the LA folk your secret.

[steel]

You know, I haven't really thought about this much.

I guess I'm straight, I mean I've had crushes before, but a lot of people think I'm gay, just because of the way I am.

Gay--------Me----Straight

That's about the best way I can describe it...

[LiVeToThRiLl90]

straight--------- gals r awesome, there not very difficult, key advice, listen to them they love to talk!!!!, but there nothing wrong with gay people.

[okinawaboy11]

straight--------- gals r awesome, there not very difficult, key advice, listen to them they love to talk!!!!, but there nothing wrong with gay people.

 

 

Girls are to high maintenance, unless they're coaster chicks, there could be a slight difference

[Nrthwnd]

but there nothing wrong with gay people.

 

Not that there was anything 'wrong' with us to begin with?

 

That said, there's really "nothing wrong" with straight peeps, too.

 

[cpfan101]

Straight here. Some of my best friends are gay so I don't have a problem with gay people. It's just their choice and I don't see why people are afraid with them as they are people.

 

--cpfan101

[steel]

One of my mom's sisters is actually homosexual, so I know the discrimination that comes with the package.

A friend of mine said I shouldn't love my aunt just because she's lesbian.

[GOgrizzlyGO]

Homo here. But I'm open-minded. I accept straight people for the lifestyle that they choose.

 

Is sexuality a choice? From my own experience, knowledge, and from the experience of others, it's not a choice for most.

 

I didn't wake up one day and decide, "Hey, I think that I want to be a person who gets stereotyped, discriminated, and hated. I think I feel like losing a few of my good friends. I think I'll come out to them. While I'm at it, I might as well come out to my parents. Who cares if my own blood disowns me? Like my mother would ever chase me with a hatchet when she finds out (hey, it's happened to a friend). Shoot, I might as well come out at work. I don't really want the job. What's my boss going to do, fire me? That has NEVER happened (sarcasm?) Hmm... When I hold another guy's hand in public, I want everyone to stare at us like we are aliens. Oooh, you know what? I don't need legal marriage, kids, adoption, or civil rights. That stuff is for straight people. Oh and the sound of an increased risk of HIV is just breathtaking. Yeah, this sounds fun. I mean, when I weigh options from both sides, CHOOSING to be gay sounds so much more appealing!"

 

I'm sorry, but if I really had a choice here, I wouldn't choose this option. We don't choose to be discriminated and hated by some. We choose to be ourselves.

 

-Kyle

[Rollerholden]

^ Amen!

[jynx242]

^^ I totally agree. I am gay, and happily so. I would not "choose" to be anything other than what I am. Is it easy? No. Is it who I am? Definitely. Even though the entire process of coming out (to myself, friends and family) was extremely scary and intimidating; I could not imagine being or trying to be anything other than who I am.

[pvcoasterguy]

^^^ That's one of the best ways I've heard it put, ever. Very nice.

[Hurricane]

^^^^

 

I will agree with all of the comments above, I didn't choose it, but it did just slap me in the face 1 day that i was actually gay.

 

It took me a while to accept it, and tell my freinds, but now i'm glad cause I dont have to hide anything!

[BiCoastal Kid]

 

[1.]Hey, I think that I want to be a person who gets stereotyped, discriminated, and hated.

 

[2.]Like my mother would ever chase me with a hatchet when she finds out (hey, it's happened to a friend).

 

[3.]Oh and the sound of an increased risk of HIV is just breathtaking.

 

[4.]We don't choose to be discriminated and hated by some. We choose to be ourselves.

 

I excluded things about the jobs/rights etc as it is undeniable that those are needed, though I think the entire context of your post was over dramatic.

 

1. To put it so blankly as such, you do not give a fair argument. You make it out as if it is completely unjustified to not like gay people when 90% of the time it is a matter of belief, and even past there are those in the community who don't exactly set a good example, and I WILL NOT defend them as I think they deserve all the discrimination they get. Just as straight people with outlandish or eccentric behavior are looked down on as well, I see no reason why it should be any different there, it's just unfortunate the the behavior of a few is attributed to the whole.

 

2. Let's not allow the experiences of a few represent the truth of the majority. I can see the reverse psychology here, where something that works in favor of your argument is used no matter how frequent the occurrence, but really this line in particular blew things way out of proportion.

 

3. ACTUALLY, you're more like to get HIV/AIDS through injection now than you are being gay.... but if you're both, I guess you're basically screwed.

 

4. This argument has always entertained me. I choose to be myself, openly, in a 80% Southern Baptist school and town, and yet I experience very little, if any, gay bashing. Have I had the few scattered remarks, yes, but being who I am I don't allow them to affect me so much, and I think that is one of the reasons I'm not harassed as much as others are. Harassment often is not solely caused by if you're gay, it has a lot to do with how you are gay. I don't care how proud you are, but if you aren't respectful or descent about it then you can't exactly blame people for being outraged. This again applies to the "actions of few being applied to the whole" idea.

 

No, I will not say that my personal experience dictates the experience of others, but being one of 4 openly gay guys at my school I've been able to observe the varying levels of "harassment" and how individual behavior really does tend to influence how much guff they get.

 

These are my ideas. Take them as you will. I just thought your post slightly unfair to the other side.

[GOgrizzlyGO]

^^For the most part, I do agree with everything you said. However, I was using these examples as reasons to support my argument regarding the "CHOICE" aspect...not the treatment aspect. Yes, I was being over-dramatic and sarcastic...that was the whole point. Of course these things don't happen to everyone, or even to a majority. But it does happen to a lot of people for many reasons.

 

It's a bit scary when you say that "I WILL NOT defend them as I think they deserve all the discrimination they get." Apparently we are still living in the 60's where it's ok to discriminate. I'm sorry, but I don't feel that there's ever a time to discriminate. I agree, there are bad apples that run around like tramps and flaunt pink. Sure, their actions can be shunned, etc. That doesn't make it ok to discriminate against them.

 

My actions (I tend to be "straight acting") usually keep me from getting harrassed, so I do agree with your statement regarding their behaviors. But that still doesn't make it right to hate them, in my opinion.

 

I agree with a lot of things you said, but in the context of a different argument. I was just arguing that gay people don't choose their sexuality.

How people choose to behave and society's reaction to those behaviors is a whole other argument that I would probably agree with you...except for the part that "they deserve all the discrimination they get."

[steel]

Well, BiCoastal Kid, I believe it is completely unjustified to dislike gay and lesbian people.

 

There is a difference between not a agreeing with them and not liking them.

I would bet money that you have friends with different political views than you.

[BiCoastal Kid]

And I would bet money that I really hate gay people???

 

No, I know I have many friends with varying views. We talk about them often, but we also have a mutual respect for eachothers' beliefs. So before you mistake me as closed minded, I'll let you know that I'm one of the more "indifferent" people when it comes to beliefs, and it is very rare that a practice or belief willl actually offend me.

 

Also, grizzly, I have to say that I remain neutral on the subject of the origin of homosexuality. It irks me when people deny the validity of either side of the arguement when there is basically no solid evidence going one way or another. I don't exactly think it's a choice, but I don't claim it to be genetic. There isn't any evidence either way. I think it's a combination of *some* genetics, but I wouldn't be surprised if it were influenced by upbringing as well. In some ways, by combining genetics and upbringing, I can see how in some cases it would come down to some form of a *choice*, but not one so obvious as "I'm gay" or "I'm straight," but perhaps if one's own experiences led them to admire traits of one sex over the other and hence, while genetically not completely homosexual, their admiration for one would lend them to going one way or the other. That may not be a choice in the most common terms, but people usually do decide what interests them and not, and I don't see why those choices couldn't in someway effect their physiological being as well.