Sexual Orientation

[DATman]

^^Why are you waiting? You keep saying "one more thing, one more thing" and one more thing happens and you say it again! Go tell, because this jerk is not worth your time or stress.

 

And complain that your school isn't really teaching acceptance when everyone is telling you that you chose to be gay when you quite obviously didn't.

[christianscoasters]

^Here's something interesting about my school. The Sophomore, Junior, and Senior classes are FULL of gay/bi people. Like, half the freaking school is gay. But everyone is so nice to them, and treats them equal. A lot of gay people come to this school because it's a special school, meaning that you have to apply to get in, so you can go here, instead of your base high school. People don't want to go to their base school because in middle school they were made fun of, and they don't want to be around the people who were always laughing and taunting them. But anyway, my class (Freshman), everyone is straight, and extremely homophobic. So, four years left is this crap...

[terrancew_hod]

^Then do something about it.

 

Send people to the principals office for harassing you. Knock someone in their jaw. Do something! Don't just stand there and take it. That's how people get power over you. Complaining to people that can't directly help you accomplishes nothing. That's why I caution people not to out themselves before they're out of high school and on their own. At that age a lot of people aren't ready for the emotional consequences of their actions. Everyone wants to be accepted and loved but really don't know how. That time is better spent learning how to love yourself and making yourself strong. Gay life ain't easy. And you need to know who your friends really are before you tell them really personal stuff... some will stop talking to you or worse yet, go tell everyone in the world your secret. You have to be prepared for that. If you aren't ready for that, then you aren't ready to have a boyfriend. That opens another can of worms. If you don't have the thick skin needed to get people off your back, you certainly aren't ready for anything else. That's why it's easier to do it after high school. You don't have to see people on a daily basis and it's easier to avoid those that give you problems.

 

Think about that for a second. I'm betting that you and your new boyfriend will get caught by your or his parents... and you think things are bad now... just wait until they find out. Be prepared for that. I've seen plenty of people do all kinds of stuff and get embroiled in massive drama for the sake of getting a man. Don't add to the list.

 

This is not to totally scare you, but you need to start getting yourself together for the life you're heading into. Either make yourself strong for the life ahead or start saving for that therapy or detox you're gonna need in your twenties.

 

Terry

[jynx242]

^^ It also might be a good idea to make friends with some of the Sophomores, Juniors and Seniors who are gay / bi. Just because you are a freshman doesn't mean that you have to hang out with only freshmen. Find yourself a "big-brother" or even better, a "big-sister." Someone who has been where you are right now and made it through it without getting expelled or having to "pull a Terrance " on someone.

 

The experience, strength and hope of others really can help us through most situations, and enable us to help others who go through the same things after we have.

 

Once again, this is just my humble opinion, but it has worked WONDERFULLY for me in the past.

 

D.

[coasterfreak101]

^Everything he said. Just find the right friends, and they'll get you through. I've got 'em, and they make my life so much better than what I've heard of life as a gay high-schooler.

 

And yeah. Tell on him, beat him up and lie (now known as pulling a Terrance), or ignore him. The latter works for me, though I haven't had to use it much since we matured in the 2 years since 8th grade.

[terrancew_hod]

Someone who has been where you are right now and made it through it without getting expelled or having to "pull a Terrance " on someone.

D.

 

C'mon, you love it when I raise my voice after someone acts up and it gets quiet in the room. Nothing but crickets... Full Diva Fits! Takes years of practice to get to that level. Can't wait until Thanksgiving at Disney, huh... call me so I can find out what hotel to book and when.

 

Terry

[christianscoasters]

beat him up

Hell no! I ain't beating up a football jock! I'm just a wimpy kid!

 

BTW, more things happened today, my friends tried to work it out, but that dude kept going, so I'm going to Student Services tomorrow!

[JuanSe_Colombia]

Hi a last weekend this guy from Miami get into my school. He is the cousin of one of my best friends so she introduce me to him. We have been becomin' friends since then, he si really handsome and great personallity. I think I kind of like him, the things is in not sure is he is bi or somethin.

This situation is like freakin' me out.

[terrancew_hod]

beat him up

Hell no! I ain't beating up a football jock! I'm just a wimpy kid!

 

I was wimpy too when I beat up that jock too. But then nobody expects me to tear a place up like I did that day. But then when they're bigger than me, I fight dirty... remember: crotch kick when he leaves himself vulnerable then grab anything heavy and beat the heck out of him!

 

Terry

[christianscoasters]

^I've heard rumors that he might be gay . Well, 1) He has a lot of "girl" friends. 2) He tries to avoid me, which a lot of "closet" homosexuals do, and 3) My bf has "Super gay-dar" (as he says) and he KNOWS he's gay. But gay-dar can lie...

[coasterfreak101]

^I wouldn't go jumping to conclusions...1) I have a lot of straight friends who have a lot of "girl" friends, 2) Some (straight) people are just like that...someone from my middle school comes to mind, and 3) Gay-Dar isn't the most trustworthy tool...though it's accurate 75% of the time.

 

Sorry, I'm really big on debunking rumors. They really suck, and they aren't true 95% of the time. And they can really kill you when they're about you...unless you can ignore (note allusion to earlier post) them.

[BiCoastal Kid]

4) You are 14.

[christianscoasters]

^^Yeah um, I didn't say he was gay...I just said that some people think he is.

 

^Duh. I'm taken anyway...Wait, being 14 doesn't even fit in with what I'm saying...

[speedracer]

^ In my years, I've noticed the ones that scream faggot the loudest (read: I'm not gay!) are the biggest of closet cases (Sen. Craig anyone?). I've got plenty of straight friends that are completely ok with me being gay because they are in turn secure enough with their own sexuality not to feel threatened by me or any other gay person whatsoever. And have no reason nor any need to put down others to validate their own hetrosexuality. For whatever reason, whether it be religious or insecurity with his own sexuality, best to just avoid him and don't allow him to get under your skin. If there is indeed a large GBLT presense at your school, try joining or even forming a gay/straight student group yourself. Always try to surround yourself with people who are a positive and supportive influence, and avoid the ones that go out of their way to bring you down.

 

Being gay here in the U.S. means growing a thick skin, there will always be ignorant aholes that will hate you for just being gay. People are ignorant stupid paranoid animals, nothing you can do will change that, but don't let it change you. Cause they are indeed the ones with the serious issues, not you. So unless you're a big strapping stud like Terrance, I'd personally avoid any physical confrontations. This ahole is obviously doing it to get a response from you, and it's working. Whereas if you grow that thick skin and don't allow him (and all future aholes just like him you'll be meeting in your lifetime) to have that control over you, they lose. Bringing it to the attention of your school though is a good idea, let the adults sort out this prick, you should be focussing on being a kid and getting good grades. Not dealing with crap like this.

[Wes]

How did this thread become smartestcoasterkid's personal teenage angst blog?

 

Honestly, the thread is going a bit off topic. I know what you're discussing relates to you being gay, but this thread isn't a constantly updating sounding board for your personal problems either. A post here or there is fine, but the past few pages have been dominated by you bitching about this bully or whatever. If you want to continue that discussion, go to livejournal.com and open an account. Let's get the thread back to its originatal topic and knock it off with the "OMG WHAT HAPPENED AT SCHOOL TODAY" crap.

[christianscoasters]

^Can do, Wes ! Thanks for the heads-up!

[Bucket]

I am gay and very proud of my sexuality. Unfortunately, it is not as accepted here in Germany as it is in California....

[christianscoasters]

^I'm sure you mean the US in general. But it isn't as accepted as you might think. I know people that were kicked out of their home because they were gay. And if you've read the last couple pages of this thread, I kinda took over about some of the things that were happening. People at my school are either very, very homphobic, or very, very acceptable people. But there isn't many homophobes at my school because you can't go there and be homophobic. THERE IS TOO MANY GAY/BI PEOPLE THERE FOR THAT!!! Ask anyone there. They'll agree

[terrancew_hod]

^^I'm sure my brother would disagree with you. He left the states in 1999 to move to Europe and hasn't been back. Now he's talking about moving back to Berlin from Finland. He almost got legally married, which would have been recognized by the EU. He's been trying to get me to move to Europe as well... he said it's a whole different world over there, especially being gay and black... but we won't go to far into that.

 

When I go on the TPR Europe trip he wants me to come over a week or two early and see what he's talking about. He even said some guys already wants to meet me... and they're looking better than what I have to put up with in the states.

 

Terry

[Loco]

^I'm sure you mean the US in general. But it isn't as accepted as you might think. I know people that were kicked out of their home because they were gay. And if you've read the last couple pages of this thread, I kinda took over about some of the things that were happening. People at my school are either very, very homphobic, or very, very acceptable people. But there isn't many homophobes at my school because you can't go there and be homophobic. THERE IS TOO MANY GAY/BI PEOPLE THERE FOR THAT!!! Ask anyone there. They'll agree

 

The US is slowly being accepting as time goes on. It's better now than it was 5-10 years ago.

[christianscoasters]

^I think the US is becoming more accepting because more and more people are coming out. So straight people are all around gay people, with no choice but to accept it.

[JuanSe_Colombia]

^ Oh cool. Here gay people are just so rejected

[Bucket]

^^I'm sure my brother would disagree with you. He left the states in 1999 to move to Europe and hasn't been back. Now he's talking about moving back to Berlin from Finland. He almost got legally married, which would have been recognized by the EU. He's been trying to get me to move to Europe as well... he said it's a whole different world over there, especially being gay and black... but we won't go to far into that.

 

When I go on the TPR Europe trip he wants me to come over a week or two early and see what he's talking about. He even said some guys already wants to meet me... and they're looking better than what I have to put up with in the states.

 

Terry

 

It sounds like your brother lived in a very liberal part of Germany though! Berlin or Köln (the gay capital of Germany) is maybe very similar to a city like San Francisco, Los Angeles or New York. However, many parts of Germany (for example Tübingen, the city that I live in) is very conservative and old fashioned. For some reason, I always picture the States to be very accepting of all kinds of people, including gays. Sure, there are homophobic people there but that is too be expected! I just think gay culture is so much better in the States than it is here.

[jynx242]

Here in the US I think it is like most places. Tolerance varies from city to city, region to region. I live in the Southeastern United States (redneck country.) This is generally thought of as a rather intolerant area, but I am from Atlanta, GA - which is a large city and has a very large gay population. I now live in Savannah, GA which is a smaller Southeastern city - but with its Historic architechture and large art college (Savannah College of Art and Design) it is very welcoming of diverse people.

 

There are many cities between Savannah and Atlanta in which I CERTAINLY wouldn't wish to be gay.

 

David

[Gnome]

I take a lot of shit for hanging out with gay people, and I"m not even gay. Excuse me for treating people like people...

 

But yea, I guess some one has to set an example.