Tanks4me05 Posted November 28, 2011 Posted November 28, 2011 How many tuba players does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the light bulb and two to drink until the room starts spinning. What do you get when you drop a tuba out of a 13 story window and it lands on a seven year old? A flat minor. So a tuba player walks into a bar... and he ends up paying $175 to fix the dent. Can anyone guess what instrument I play?
cfc Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Here's a copy editor joke for you. How many copy editors does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Vague. Do you mean to replace the lightbulb or to have sex in it?
STR8FXXXINEDGE Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 While we're doing lightbulb jokes... How did the hipster burn his hand? He unscrewed the lightbulb before it was cool.
Masquerade Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Did you hear that McDonalds is introducing the McSandusky Burger? It is a piece of old meat between fresh buns. I am going to Hell.
Rollercoaster Rider Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Do you remember that kid at Six Flags Over Georgia who got Decapitated? He'd lose his head if it wasn't attached.
Bryce232 Posted December 1, 2011 Posted December 1, 2011 There is an old restaurant that has a magic mirror that if you tell a lie while looking at it, it will suck you in. One day, a red head walked up to the mirror and said "I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world" and it sucked her in. The following day, a brunette walked up to the mirror and said "I think I'm the most beautiful woman in the world" and it sucked her in. Finally, the next day, a blonde walked up to the mirror and said "I think-" and it sucked her in.
MayTheGForceBeWithYou Posted December 1, 2011 Posted December 1, 2011 Two men walked into a bar. A third saw it and ducked under.
Philrad71 Posted December 4, 2011 Posted December 4, 2011 Did you hear that McDonalds is introducing the McSandusky Burger? It is a piece of old meat between fresh buns. I am going to Hell. Yep, definitely!!!
Thecoasterrus Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 This jokes is a bit dark so you will have to bear with me... I was upset because my friend had died. and i felt gulity for months until i just decided to give it up. I had a rope around my neck and i was ready to jump. then my mum ran in and told me not to do it, I replyed "What have i got to live for"? then she said "well were going to six flags america,do you want to come with us?" I kicked the stool away...
FJM8 Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 Why the skeleton didn't go to the party? Because it had nobody to go with. I know, I'm extremly ridiculous.
Rollercoaster Rider Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 What's the difference between Bridesmaids and Showgirls? Showgirls was funny
STR8FXXXINEDGE Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 A guy goes to the store to buy a box of condoms. The cashier says "Do you need a bag, sir?" The guys says "No, she's not THAT ugly!"
pdcon Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Did you hear when Michael Jackson died, since his body was 80% percent plastic from plastic surgery, they decided to melt him down and turn him into legos, that was little boys can play with him.
caffeine_demon Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Millenium force is the worlds number 1 steel coaster... Makes me laugh every time......
theonetheonlyJT Posted September 1, 2012 Posted September 1, 2012 SFStL getting a Boomerang sorry I meant boomerbang
imawesome1124 Posted September 1, 2012 Posted September 1, 2012 The only time it's bad that Jesus loves you is if you're in a Mexican prison.
imawesome1124 Posted September 10, 2012 Posted September 10, 2012 An Irishman walks out of a bar... That's the joke.
paintballer Posted September 12, 2012 Posted September 12, 2012 ^ racisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst
imawesome1124 Posted September 17, 2012 Posted September 17, 2012 ^ racisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst I'm Irish so I can make fun of myself.
bert425 Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 Q: What do you call 100 lesbians with assault rifles? A: Militia Etheridge
bert425 Posted September 19, 2012 Posted September 19, 2012 While we're doing lightbulb jokes... How did the hipster burn his hand? He unscrewed the lightbulb before it was cool. how many Jewish Grandmothers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? zero. "if you vant me to sid in the darrk, I'll sid in the darrk"
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now