Fun Spot Kissimmee- This time starting in the daylight
I've already written two relatively recent reports for Fun Spot Kissimmee, but this report is different for two reasons. One, I actually spent some time at the park during broad daylight. With the park's incredible schedule that has it open until midnight every single day, it's hard for me to justify going during the daytime while the other parks are still open. But in this visit, I had some time to kill while I waited for my buddy to run some errands near Old Town.
Secondly, I rode the single most terrifying attraction in Kissimmee.
Believe it or not, the SkyCoaster isn't the most terrifying attraction in the park. It's terrifying, don't get me wrong. Staring 300 feet straight down at the ground while only being supported by a wee little cable will make most people sweat. The height was even more daunting this time since I remembered a glasses strap. I call that the Falcon's Fury effect.
I think I rode it twice, once during the day and once in the evening. The feeling of that initial plunge is exhilarating. Once you pull that ripcord, you bow forwards 90 degrees and plunge towards the ground like a missile. Actually it may be more than 90 degrees since I start to just feel my legs beyond my body before the cable corrects my position. The sheer length of the plunge is the most impressive part. It's probably only a second longer than the smaller SkyCoasters, but that added 100 feet feels like an eternity. 10 out of 10
So I continued my way around the park, coming across another candidate for the most terrifying attraction in the park.
I came close to 30 laps on Mine Blower, each better than the last. Every seat is outstanding on this unbelievably compact coaster, but the money seat is the back row. The whip over that sneakily steep first drop results in some wicked airtime. And that's followed by an aggressive zero-G roll doing its best RMC impression. The start of this ride really does remind me of a smaller Wildfire.
The ride does shuffle a bit around the corners, but when you see how tight the turns are, you really should be impressed Gravity Group was able to fit any sort of coaster into this spot, especially one that's as intense as this. The rest of the layout probably has another 9-10 pops of airtime with the airtime of each subsequent hill becoming more and more abrupt. The last 2-3 leading into the brake run really do feel like a buckling bronco. 9 out of 10
Ok I know my title was a bit deceptive. I said I rode the most terrifying ride in Kissimmee and you probably thought it was Fun Spot's SkyCoaster. You also probably thought it was at Fun Spot. The Vomatron is not located at Fun Spot, so it cost an extra $15-20 to ride. Since work had covered my hotel and flight down to Orlando, I decided to spend half of the cost of a Spirit flight on the Vomatron. I've ridden similar ones in a portable KMG Speed, the Zenobio at Coney Island, a miniature one at Skyline Park, and the oddly resistant-to-looping CyperSpace at Oktoberfest.
But this one was a bit different. At the end of each arm, there were only two seats instead of the 4 person back-to-back seating arrangement. I wasn't sure if the seating arrangement would result in a wilder ride. It's hard to say whether or not it did. While the others were much more unpredictable, Vomatron performed the same flip in the same location every time. So while I knew exactly when the flip was coming, it was one heck of a fantastic flip. It was much longer and more drawn out than flips on similar rides.
The operator also ran a nice, long cycle for this type of attraction. Not sure if that's the norm or not, but I was literally the only person by this attraction and the Slingshot. I think I prefer the more unpredictable nature of the KMG Speed, but this was still one heck of an intense flat. 9 out of 10
Yet it still wasn't the scariest ride in Kissimmee. Ok I've drawn it out long enough. It was none other than...their go karts! I kid you not. The most terrifying attraction at a park with an inverting wooden coaster and the world's tallest skycoaster is a go kart track. Specifically their Vortex track.
But these are no ordinary go karts.
These are the fastest go karts I've ever ridden. I remember hearing stories about the old Action Park how employees wedged tennis balls into the governors to increase the speed of the carts. I'm not saying Fun Spot is circumventing the governors, but I am saying that these carts have significantly more power than the others I've ridden.
There are also moving obstacles known as the employees. While every other go kart track I've seen usually has a nice grassy pathway adjacent to the track for the safety of their employees in sue-happy America, Fun Spot doesn't have room for that. Since they have multilevel tracks that (in many cases) are built right on top of each other, the employees must play a game of Crossy Road to help stranded carts. And because of the track design, crashes are abundant. Why?
Vortex was designed by a mad genius. The track begins innocently enough with a 4 story helix. I've seen that before. But what I have never seen any park have the balls to construct is a colossal (by go kart standards) 30 foot plunge followed by a banked turn. Yes you read that right. I'm not describing a coaster here. I'm describing a user controlled set of go karts.
Every single time I crested that hill, I prepared for one of the most terrifying moments of airtime ever. I've definitely experienced more negative Gs on roller coasters, but there the train is fastened to the track. This felt more like airtime on a water slide. When you physically feel the cart go slightly airborne and bounce wildly down a 30 foot ramp, it's truly a unique experience. I prayed every single time that I gunned it over that hill that there wouldn't be a multi-car pile-up at the bottom because quite frankly, I don't know if I could stop in time.
The banked turn afterwards is perfectly designed such that almost everyone fishtails around it. And if you take the turn really tightly, there's a decent chance you'll still be skidding as you careen down the subsequent 15-20 foot plunge. That alone is insane. Honestly any of the last three elements are insane. But Fun Spot added a fourth in another hairpin turn after this second drop. I laughed how the park had helmets available upon request, but I honestly wouldn't blame one for taking one after driving Vortex.
It was one of the most wild and unexpected experiences I've had at any amusement park. I can't believe I skipped Fun Spot's go karts in my past visits, but I'll never make that mistake again. After I got my driver's license, go karts sort of lost their luster. They felt slow and boring. Fun Spot restored my faith in go karts. 10 out of 10
With a renewed faith in go karts, I had to try Chaos. Now you'd think a track named Chaos would be wilder than something called Vortex, but it wasn't. The carts were equally as fast, but it lacked the signature WTF moment of Vortex. Instead of building up to a crescendo, Chaos was consistently great. I honestly couldn't recollect the layout as it was an endless array of turns and drops with seemingly no coherent pattern. 9 out of 10
I was stunned to see the park's screamin' swing operational. This was my fourth visit to the park and this is the first time I've seen Hot Seat open. And if I remember correctly, I think the board actually listed it as closed. I certainly wasn't going to complain about one of the best style of flats being open.
I rode twice, both times facing the water during the maximum swings. The ride's Achilles heel is shared by all screamin' swings- the cycle length. These things are always short, but you get 3-4 really great moments of floater air. 8 out of 10
All kidding aside, the employees of Fun Spot Kissimmee are quite good. But I still found it hysterical that this cat basically set up camp inside the flying scooters. As I waited for an operator, I began to think the cat was the ride operator. Eventually an operator did arrive and joked the cat was the park's mascot. I guess they wanted a mascot that can hunt mice.
I visited the park on a very windy day. Flyer fans like myself lick their lips for conditions like this. With the added boost of 20-25 mph wind gusts, I was able to get some light snapping. Granted everything is light after experiencing the insanity of the Knoebels Flyer, but this was still a really fun ride. 8 out of 10
I did ride the Rockstar Coaster twice. As far as these Zamperla/Reverchon wild mice go, Rockstar is among the best. It's quite smooth and tends to spin a ton. I can say the spinning is consistently wild on this one because of the park's crowd levels. While most parks try and load these vehicles to the max to compensate for their 4 person cars, Fun Spot is perfectly fine sending out single riders, which results in spinning levels rivaling those of tea cups. 6 out of 10
Every time I visit Fun Spot, I discover another awesome reason to love the park. This time I discovered the insane go karts and the park's lovable unofficial mascot. Not sure what I'll discover next time, but I'm guessing it'll involve more rides on Mine Blower, that SkyCoaster, and the go karts.