Sexual Orientation

[mike541x]

Im straight and always will.

[Token Yankee Guy]

Im straight and always will.

 

Good to know, I'll make sure to make a note of it.

[coasterfreak101]

^ This isn't a dating service... Or is it?!?!?

 

TPR is completely a dating service, have you tried it yet?

[haiderodes]

lately I've been having a lot of dreams about my mom "finding out"...strange

[Vigilante]

I wouldn't bet without a doubt that it is because you are sub conscious about it, therefore having a dream about it.

 

Like, I have weird dreams about me and Dominic.

[Hurricane]

well... my dad found out today, and it didn't end well... thats all i'm going to say right now.

[haiderodes]

I commend everyone that's coming out so young. Its a hard thing.

 

But it does make me wonder, how do you know at 13, 14, and 15 years old. I guess I just went through a period of denial? Or is it just that it takes time to discover for yourself? I know we've had this discussion before, but I think its probably due to your environment how soon you "come to terms".

 

For me its wierd. Most of my friends know, but not all of them. I dont really care if other people know or not...i mean im not flaming but we all have our days and traits. My immediate family proves to me everyday that I cannot just tell them, but I guess subconciously I do, just to get it over with. ah...these are the days of our lives.

[SonOfBeastSucks]

But it does make me wonder, how do you know at 13, 14, and 15 years old. I guess I just went through a period of denial? Or is it just that it takes time to discover for yourself?

I was never in denial. I simply don't want my parents to know right now, and I won't want them to know for a long time. Some parents are simply not accepting of homosexuality, and that is why children don't tell them. IMO, telling your parents at that young age causes unnecessary drama and possible problems.

[CoasterExpert13]

^ Which is exactly why I waited until I turned 19 and then told my parents, siblings & friends that I was gay...just this past Janurary. I didn't think my parents would dis-own me because thats not the type of people they are. However, I did think that they would say it's just a phase, so that they can turn a blind eye to it. Which would eventually piss me off to force them to except me. Instead, I was quite shocked, they said that they always knew and was waiting for me to come and tell them. Jeez...if I knew that I would have told them at age 12. I agree to a ceartin degree with "SonOfBeastsucks", while I do think that coming out to your parents at such a young age may produce a few problems, on the other hand it can very well put your parents at ease from wondering wether you are or not. For the same reasons that we don't ask our parents for details about their sex lives, is why most parents wouldn't just come right out and ask their child if he/she is gay...It's sort of a weird moment.

[HAYASHI]

^^ both posts are on point in situations upon others, and there are many different factors to include. Yet, I also believe peoples outting period isnt so much adversely affected by the people around them, but by the individual locked in their own closet.

 

It basically comes down to how comfortable YOU are with your identity and who you are as a function to society. How secure are you with yourself?

 

The possibilities why we're insecure, is that we discover the importance of being gay(good or bad) at our early teens. In our teens, we are inflicted with life choices to make to prepare us to function in society. Furthermore, choices definately become sensitive and difficult when parents guide you into a direction other than your own (partly, why telling our parents is so hard). We, at the same period, learn our flaws in other peoples perceptions, clouding our confidence and pride.

 

We learn to come out in our late teens or even in midlife, because we later come to terms with our identity, and are comfortable where we stand with the people around us. Thanks to popular culture, young adults and early teens can now feel vindicated and come out at an early age. A great start to learn more about one self.

[sfmmFREAK]

but some people don't understand that just because you are curious or you've had some experiences does not make you homosexual

[HAYASHI]

^being curious is natural and a human behavior EVERYONE has and does. that doesnt determine one sexuality. it really depends on you when you do understand. you have to ask that person who was curious and who had experience(s), is if they liked it or not.

 

but, considering if the experience (im assuming sexual) occured in more than one occasion, it does raise an eyebrow.

[Vigilante]

Or you could be heteroflexible?

 

Ok, I have a dilemma. I probably am bi, but the thing is, I have tried it with other men, but I didn't really care for it, but I still do have feelings for guys. What is up with that? I really don't understand.

 

I did things with many girls, I enjoyed it, but I still like guys too.

[BiCoastal Kid]

RANDOM POST: Hayashi, can I say that I appreciate your style?

[HAYASHI]

Ok, I have a dilemma. I probably am bi, but the thing is, I have tried it with other men, but I didn't really care for it, but I still do have feelings for guys. What is up with that? I really don't understand.

 

One thing i have learned is that there is no such thing as likeing two things equally. There is always one better over the other in a choice that needs to be made.

 

I was in your position, and sometimes i like to think i can be bi. Although, being bi is real, it depends on what level your talking about. You can be bi in a sexual way, where you can have sex w/ both genders. BUT, in a relationship way, there is a choice. You can have sex with all the girls you want, but if what you really want is to be loved by a guy, then in the end, a guy is what you need.

 

go with your feelings. dont force yourself to think otherwise.

 

btw.. thanks for the add!

 

ps.. thanks BiCoastal Kid, yes you can say that

[haiderodes]

That's why some of my friends as well as others keep the saying "bi then gay"

[verticalzero]

Everyone is GAY, just in Denial

[BiCoastal Kid]

Nature is a whore.

[Vigilante]

So is my mum, but I don't go around calling her names. >.

[Krazykral10]

Everyone is GAY, just in Denial

I think it is more of eneryone is BI and just in denial.

Anyhow, my mo found out the HARD way. So I'm definately at the beach for the whole summer staying with my dad (divorceed parents) and the night before I was meeting my boyfriend at the park to say goodbye. I was to be home at dark, but was a little late. So mommy dearest went looking for me. Well she sort of caught me making out with my boyfriend That was the LAST way I wanted her to find out. So I had to come out to my father too, but that wasn't as bad we just sat in silence for a while. BUt things are actually better at my house now that they know.

[map2]

I'm straight.

[haiderodes]

I think it is more of eneryone is BI and just in denial.

Anyhow, my mo found out the HARD way. So I'm definately at the beach for the whole summer staying with my dad (divorceed parents) and the night before I was meeting my boyfriend at the park to say goodbye. I was to be home at dark, but was a little late. So mommy dearest went looking for me. Well she sort of caught me making out with my boyfriend That was the LAST way I wanted her to find out. So I had to come out to my father too, but that wasn't as bad we just sat in silence for a while. BUt things are actually better at my house now that they know.

 

WOW. That sounds like the stuff you see on television. Like an episode of Queer as Folk!

 

That definately sounds like a less than ideal situation, but if it means things are a bit better now then it has to be worth it. At least its off your chest.

 

I think my biggest concern, is not the fact about my family knowing (for all I know they could already know). Its the line of questioning that will come after. My family gives the third degree no matter what the situation. I think that's even more uncomfortable. That's prolly when I say "dont ask questions you dont want the answer to".

[Krazykral10]

Yea my mom got to the question stage. First it was enraged anger, then it was denial, threatening of ''straight-enizing'' me, then questions! Oh the questions...blah! But yea it wasn't THAT bad (i mean the making out ) haha jk. But glad its over with.

[HAYASHI]

the saying usally goes, "moms always know."

 

moms might already have an idea about your orientation, but are either respectful to wait for you to say something, or are in denial and hope its not true. but despite their own reasonings, they already have your orientation on point.

 

its like a secret power moms have on their children. haha

[Hurricane]

WHAT A WAY TO BE FOUND OUT! Don't worry last week the same thing happened to me... so yea, it can be the easiest and hardest way to be found out...