Bubba83 Posted January 19, 2008 Posted January 19, 2008 The english gentlemen's driveby. [pulls up next to another car] "Oh Reginald, I disagree!" [speeds off]
chmilo24 Posted January 20, 2008 Posted January 20, 2008 Peter- Meg it's about time that you need to start carrying protection. Meg- Dad that's a trash bag. Peter- I know, Hefty Hefty Hefty. (holds condom) Wimpy Wimpy Wimpy.
Adrenaline_Rush Posted January 21, 2008 Posted January 21, 2008 Peter - "Am I am I supposed to paint the penis?" "Am I am I supposed to sculpt the penis?" "Am I am I supposed to conduct with my penis?"
XLRBR Posted March 5, 2008 Posted March 5, 2008 "I see London, I see France, I see Stewie's unsightly chapped @$$."
sfotkid Posted March 5, 2008 Posted March 5, 2008 < I'm not going to call the Hospital because you won't learn your lesson.
downunder Posted March 5, 2008 Posted March 5, 2008 You know why Tom Cruise runs in movies? > you know the rest...
chmilo24 Posted March 6, 2008 Posted March 6, 2008 Stewie-Go ahead and feel free to say no to this, but can you shave my coin purse? Brian-What? Oh God! NO!!! WHAT?!?! OH MY GOD NO!!!
Yankee cannonball Posted March 6, 2008 Posted March 6, 2008 Stewie- apply the lotion! random old dude- BRIAN!!!!! Chris: I'll pay you a dollar a day to sniff my feet! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...I peed and pooped.
bspellx5 Posted March 6, 2008 Posted March 6, 2008 Peter[holds out credit card] Little Girl at lemonade stand: But Mr, I need real money. I can't take a credit card. Peter: Oh I see cash only eh, eh!No paper trail eh! What are you selling? Reefer? Crack? Smack? Horse? Ex? Shrooms? Dust? Meth? In my neighborhood?! I dont think so!!
the ghost Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 The fire truck slowly stalks its prey It advances on the vicyim The ambulances will wait there turn for their share. Im a tumor im a tumor
BlackHole2005 Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 Louis: All I have to do is take brian to the park and he'll forget about it (Whilst driving to the park) Brian: Oh my god louis I think I know where were going! Hey I pee on that tree! Theres another dog in that car! Hey Other dog! Other Dog! Hey other dog, F**k you!
chmilo24 Posted December 31, 2008 Posted December 31, 2008 Stewie-"Wait, Germany has weapons of mass destruction? So why doesn't America go in and kick their asses?" Brian-"Maybe because they don't have any oil." Stewie-"Oh clap clap clap clap." --Chris
kamikazewatermelon Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Lois: Well, the only upside is that it's given me time to think about why I ended up in here. I guess I was stealin' because I was so sick of the same old routine. I felt like I had a void in my life, like, like, there was a secret hole in me... Quagmire: Oh God! Lois:...and I was tryin' to fill that hole with all kinds of expensive objects, and things... Quagmire: Oh God!!! Lois: ...and I felt wonderful with all those things fillin' that hole. Quagmire: Oh God!!!!!! Lois: I did this to myself, so I'm just gonna have to lay back and let the penal system teach me a lesson. Quagmire: That one is also sexual.
chmilo24 Posted January 1, 2009 Posted January 1, 2009 Brian-Oh look a trail of used tissues. Stewie-Yeah that should lead us to Mort. Brian-Or Quagmire Stewie-Ewwww! He is so nasty. --Chris
TheHulk Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Stewie: "Lois! Lois, Lois, Lois, Lois, Lois. Mom, mom, mom. Mommy, mommy, mommy. Mamma, mamma, mamma. Ma, ma, ma, ma. Mom, mom, mom, mom. Mommy, mommy. Mamma, mamma, mamma. Lois: "WHAT?!" Stewie: "Hi." *laughs and runs off" _________________________________________ Meg: "....so I baked you a pie." Brian: "Oh wow. Hey, that looks delicious. Mmm, wow, this is good. What's in there? Meg: "Well, there's some apples, and some cinnemon...and my hair." Brian: "What?" Meg: "My hair is in the pie Brian, and now it's inside of you. Part of me, is inside of you Brian. Do you feel me Brian? Do you feel me inside of you?"
paintballer Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 And then an EVIL POTS AND PAN ROBOT SHOWS UP!
chmilo24 Posted January 2, 2009 Posted January 2, 2009 Kiss-"I'm gonna rock and roll all night..." Lois-"And... have a wonderful time?!?!" --Chris
alpengeistdude321 Posted January 3, 2009 Posted January 3, 2009 Peter: Well guys, my vasectomy is tomorrow. Cleveland: You poor bastard. After all, sex is pointless without potency. Quagmire: That's right, you take the venom out of a cobra and what do you got? You got a...a belt.
chmilo24 Posted January 3, 2009 Posted January 3, 2009 Herbert-I know what boys like. I know what guys need. I know what boys like, boys like, boys like me. --Chris
N8BGR8 Posted April 1, 2009 Posted April 1, 2009 Tom Tucker: A bit of breaking news. A local family is forced out of their home by ghosts. Who are they gonna call? Diane Simmons: Ghostbusters, Tom? Tom Tucker: No, Diane. Their insurance company. That's just stupid what you said.
TPDave Posted April 1, 2009 Posted April 1, 2009 Stewie: "So is there any tread left on the tyres or at this point is it just like throwing a hot dog down a hallway?" Dave "I'm a tumor i'm a tumor i'm a tumor" Wilson
Xpress Posted April 1, 2009 Posted April 1, 2009 Think this has been posted before, but that makes it that much more awesome. Gigity.
Guest Posted April 1, 2009 Posted April 1, 2009 My two favorite family guy quotes ever: "Hey baby, want some Adam West penis?" and "I thought you said we was gonna see hairspray?" "B*tch I thought I said just shutup and be lookin fine!" Pretty much anything the "oh no" guy says is gold also.
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