ash.1111 Posted September 25, 2008 Posted September 25, 2008 What's the worst thing about shitting your pants on the train...? ... forgetting to wear pants.
PoisonedPirate Posted September 25, 2008 Posted September 25, 2008 Why do women get married in white? To match the kitchen appliances! My German teacher used to tell us lots of these lol
KPWoCkAxX Posted September 25, 2008 Posted September 25, 2008 Not really a joke but what the heck! Margaret Thatcher is going to be buried at the bottom of a man made lake, At least she will have been when we're doing urinating on her grave. I would use the bad words in that but I would get banned.... AGAIN!
Disney Dood Posted September 26, 2008 Posted September 26, 2008 Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Huh? Neither has he!
Manny In England Posted September 26, 2008 Posted September 26, 2008 Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I
pkd freak Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 John, a biker, walked into a sports bar around 10: PM. He sat down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The news was just coming on.. The crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump. The blonde looked at John and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" John says, "You know, I bet he'll jump." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." John placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!" Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 to John, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money." John laughed, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and so I knew he would jump." The blonde replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again"....... John took the money....
BeemerBoy Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle.
gerd.muller Posted April 10, 2009 Posted April 10, 2009 Q: Why do women rub their eyes in the morning? A: Because they don't have any balls to scratch.
KnottsDisneyFarm Posted April 14, 2009 Posted April 14, 2009 newscast:ten brazillian soldiers died in an avalanche blonde:(breaks down crying) man:why are you crying? blonde:how much is ten brazillian
gerd.muller Posted April 15, 2009 Posted April 15, 2009 A circus owner runs an ad for a lion tamer and two people show up. One is a good looking, older retired golfer in his late sixties and the other is a gorgeous blonde in her mid-twenties.. The circus owner tells them, “I’m not going to sugar coat it. This is one ferocious lion. He ate my last tamer so you two had better be good or you’re history. Here’s your equipment — chair, whip and a gun. Who wants to try out first?” The girl says, “I’ll go first.” She walks past the chair, the whip and the gun and steps right into the lion’s cage. The lion starts to snarl and pant and begins to charge her. About halfway there, she throws open her coat revealing her beautiful naked body. The lion stops dead in his tracks, sheepishly crawls up to her and starts licking her feet and ankles. He continues to lick and kiss her entire body for several minutes and then rests his head at her feet. The circus owner’s jaw is on the floor. He says, “I’ve never seen a display like that in my life.” He then turns to the retired golfer and asks, “Can you top that?” The tough old golfer replies, “No problem, just get that lion out of there
KnottsDisneyFarm Posted April 15, 2009 Posted April 15, 2009 Can you give us a picture of the blonde?
rollerboy Posted April 20, 2009 Posted April 20, 2009 ¡ʎɐqǝ ɟɟo pɹɐoqʎǝʞ ɐ ʎnq ı ǝɯıʇ ʇsɐl ǝɥʇ sı sıɥʇ
rollerboy Posted April 21, 2009 Posted April 21, 2009 Haha. You just click here. The rest is pretty simple.
KnottsDisneyFarm Posted June 13, 2009 Posted June 13, 2009 Joke=What do you call a 3 headed anorexic monkey having a seizure? Answer=A 3 headed anorexic monkey having a seizure!
onewheeled999 Posted June 13, 2009 Posted June 13, 2009 Joke=What do you call a 3 headed anorexic monkey having a seizure? Answer=A 3 headed anorexic monkey having a seizure! It's so funny I forgot to laugh.
rollerboy Posted June 13, 2009 Posted June 13, 2009 Microsoft recently announced that they're releasing Windows 7 in Europe without an Internet browser and users will have to download and install one for themselves. Anyone else see a key flaw with this? And... I once had an atom that lost an electron. The police charged me for it. How ionic. I have loads. But I don't know how American humor works.
PoisonedPirate Posted June 13, 2009 Posted June 13, 2009 A salty old seadog I'm told Drank beer as the weather got cold As he lifted the cup NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP! And you just got limer-rick-rolled
STR8FXXXINEDGE Posted June 14, 2009 Posted June 14, 2009 Q: Why do Mermaids wear Seashells? A: Because B-Shells are too small, and D-Shells are too big! Zzzzzzzing!
KnottsDisneyFarm Posted June 14, 2009 Posted June 14, 2009 ^My dad told me that one...that's his kind of humor. Chuck Norris got bit by a snake...two days later, the snake died.
TheStig Posted June 14, 2009 Posted June 14, 2009 You know what's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Being raped.
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