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Posted

^Because you went to bed two hours too late the night before.

 

Why is a "free" range chicken so expensive?

Posted

^The chicken is always expensive - it is the Range you cook it on that is free - usually hidden behind the check out though, you have to ask for it.

 

Why don't we call sunglasses anti-sunglasses?

Posted

Because then we have to order "Depressiva-" instead of "Anti-Depressiva-Medication" at our Analysts desk!

 

Why do fat people at McDonalds or BurgerKing or.... always order a Diet-Coke to their XXL-Meal?

Posted

Because the No Cal drink justifies their High Cal meal. Balance. Yin and yang.

 

Why isn't there a green monorail at Disneyland?

Posted

Because we listen too much to the late great George Carlin.

 

Why can I remember a phone number I learned when I was like eight years old, but I cannot remember where I put my keys in a ten by twelve kitchen just minutes ago?

Posted

Because back when you were a kid, phone numbers only had two digits in them!

 

Why did Walt Disney decide to build Disneyland in Anaheim?

Posted

He needed "happiest place on Earth" to be true in some way, shape, or form.

 

Why can't everyone just call it "pop" and be done with it?

Posted

Because if you called your mom "Pop," she'd pop you...

 

Why is the rail gauge on North American railroads 56-1/2 inches?

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

^

As long as there is no animal product in it, and if they don't eat it because of the animal shape, I gladly will

 

If you can't trust yourself, can you trust anybody?

Posted

Because the more times they post, the more chocolate they get to eat!

 

What does the "i" stand for in "iPhone," "iPod," etc.?

Posted

Because you often come in contact with the Men in Black but don't remember it.

 

...and who do you think split the dogs head...in half...?

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

If they keep taking their baths in the mud, yeah, they'll stink all right...

 

Why does the U.S. Mint keep changing our change?

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