cfc

Well, might as well post the latest picture of me. I call it, "A Geek's Smoky Mountain Adventure." Chuck "No threat to Grizzly Adams" Campbell. Just moments before the bear tore him limb from limb.

Tragically, the world's entire allotment of department-store Santas was lost today when this rollercoaster derailed just moments after this picture was taken.

^^Now that is a shirt that begs to be purchased.

I wonder it this concoction is Atkins Diet approved? It isn't surprising that Americans embraced Atkins--can't beat a diet that promises unlimited bacon! Chuck "I'm not a vegetarian, but I have cut back on red meat" Campbell

^Then only your "Male Nurse Action Figure," with "super CPR action," could save you!

That is really taking a meatloaf sandwich too far.

Think I'll have the green salad tonight, thank you. But I am going to invest in companies that make anti-cholesterol drugs and de-fibrillators--these pictures should raise the value of that stock considerably. Chuck "Did you know that pig salivary glands are a principal ingredient of chorizo?" Campbell

Good job, Derek. How does the Great Wolf in Willy's Burg stack up to the one in the Poconos?

I caught The Aristocrats (which is not to be confused with Disney's The Aristocats) at a late show last night at the Kimball in Williamsburg. How many of you are familiar with this one? It's a documentary about a notorious dirty joke that has been passed down from comedian to comedian for god knows how long. The flick is basically just a series of conversations with different comedians about this infamous joke, their versions of it, and their different philosophies regarding comedy in general. George Carlin, Bob Saget, Robin Williams, Marin Mull, Drew Carey, and even Larry Storch (Corporal Agarn from F Troop), among others, offer their take on the joke (I thought Gilbert Gottffried told it best, and Storch was pretty funny, too). I won't repeat any versions of the joke, mainly because it would violate the "PG-13" restriction of TPR and the basic joke itself wouldn't translate well here--the humor is in the telling (and how disgusting the teller can make it). But the punchline is "The Aristocrats." Catch this one--it's hilarious.

Rebel Yell (PKD)

No. Do you admit to being a fan of the movies of Ed Wood, Jr.?

^Perhaps too many party-hardy Vegas types bumbled into the "World of Coke" expecting the powdered variety.

I'm number 19! I'm number 19! Somehow, that doesn't really "sing" as a cheer.

^Yes, Soren--you haven't lived until you enjoyed the pleasure that is Beverly. Wait, that sounds like title of a porn movie. You haven't lived until you've tasted the exquisite Beverly. This is getting worse and worse. Chuck "I'd better quit before it gets any worse" Campbell

Thanks for the Funderland link--looks like the place has expanded a bit since I last set foot in it (a long time ago).

This looks a helluva lot better than the old facility, which was just a gift shop with drink dispensers. Bit more personality, I think. Too bad the ice cave is gone, but all things must pass. Ah, Beverly . . . I tell you Beverly is a soft drink! No, Beverly is an aftershave lotion! It's a soft drink! It's an aftershave! Hey, settle down you two! Beverly is a soft drink and an aftershave lotion!

Mighty good pancakes, too. I didn't realize there was a credit at Funderworld. My brother used to take my nieces there all the time when they were little--then over to Vic's for ice cream.

Have you ever eaten at the Tower Cafe? Pretty good eatin' there, last time I checked.

Good stuff. I'll be flying into Sacramento around Christmastime (my brother and his family live near Land Park, and my parents live at Kings Beach up at Lake Tahoe). Too bad you couldn't sneak a trip over to Sac's teeny amusement park--Funderland (or is it Funderama?) at William Land Park, near the zoo. No coasters, just a bunch of old, vintage flats (like the Tilt-a-Whirl).

^^ Thanks for the extra insight, Wally. I don't follow the politics of beer very closely. Busch waved the flag quite a bit at BGW last summer--an orgy of American patriotism in a European themed park. And yet, Great America has a water park with an Australian theme. It's a wacky world.

Sam Adams--a brewer and a patriot--salutes you, Wally. Speaking of Busch's reign of terror and abuse of hops, the company started posting the "Great American Beer Company Challenge" in their men's rooms at BGW and Water Country USA (and, I presume, their other parks). At the beginning of the season, many of these signs were attacks on SOUTH AFRICAN-OWNED Miller Brewing, but most of those signs mysteriously disappeared as the summer wore on. Now they mostly tout the excellence of pure Bud . . . Yep, Busch will get you coming and going. Yes, I just couldn't resist getting a picture of this. Who thought stopping to take a leak could be so educational? How about posting the sports page next time, like they do at Chili's?

I hear that if you google "Google," the resulting loop will tear a hole in the space-time continuum, which will suck the entire universe into another dimension where we will all be ruled by a ruthless cabal of omnipotent opossums, woodchucks, and vampiric squirrels. Tried it. Whew! What a relief!

I've been living in Virginia since the late 1980s, but I come from central California, so quakes and tremors were just part of life's rich pageant when I was growing up. I remember playing under the Christmas tree when I was a kid. The tree started swaying back and forth, and I thought that Christmas was going to come crashing down on me like Santa through a termite-ridden roof. Then the tree snapped back into place--didn't lose one single ornament, either. We actually had a quake in Virginia last year (a 3.2, as I recall), somewhere in the Shenandoah Valley in the NE part of the state. People still felt it in Williamsburg, roughly 150 miles SE of the epicenter. I was sitting in my office, working away, when people started gasping because of the "jolt. " I didn't feel a thing. As I told my coworkers: "I grew up in California. If it's less than a 4, I don't even notice it." Oh, and Happy Belated Birthday, Elissa. A California quake is the gift that keeps on giving.

Hmm--might just make me consider checking out the Studios park. Looks like a cool addition.

Arghh! This be goin' in pyrate's sea chest!