Leaderboard

Bonjour! Erik & Smisty here. You may remember us from such trip reports as Erik & Smisty & TPR do Holland, Poland, and Swedeland. Travel has been kind of weird the past 3 years--and still is--but if TPR was ready to give organized trips a go again, we were down. We went to 12 new-to-us theme parks, rode something like 40-45 new roller coasters (I don't really count) and 30-40 new dark rides. There was less sightseeing on our own this trip, both because of timing and the fact that we flew in and out of the same city this time. But we still got in a few extra things. As a reminder, in addition to being overweight, I have scoliosis. And while my condition has never (to my knowledge) been exacerbated by riding roller coasters, and I can generally fit on most everything, how a particular ride's restraints fit me will often greatly affect my opinion of the ride in a way that often won't make a lot of sense to other people. On the other hand, I tend to be pretty forgiving of general roughness or violence as long as it's not specifically targeting me. So, for example, I find Helix (at Liseberg) awful, but I love Desperado (at Buffalo Bill's). So, just because I don't like a particular ride certainly doesn't mean that you won't love it. Everybody good with that? Okay, great! Also, please bear in mind that I am crafting the first part of this trip report whilst under the influence of European Brand COVID™, so my already often strange captions may or may not end up being total gibberish. Off we go...! Part 1: France in Germany Part 2: Germany in Germany Part 3: Exotic Belgium Part 4: America in France Paris! Okay, enough of that. Wait, this is my first coaster of the trip?! I don't even ride s#!t like this! But the park was so nice to us that I didn't want to appear rude. Which, I guess I'm kind of being rude now. Sorry. Let's start again. The first official park of the trip was originally meant to be Europa. But since that's a 10-hour drive from Paris, and European labor laws required a fairly lengthy break in the middle of that for our bus driver (fair enough) it just made sense to stop at Walygator Grand Est. Just one problem: Walygator was closed that day. But Robb somehow convinced them to bring in a few people to walk us around and let us ride a couple of their coasters. So that's kind of amazing. This is Anaconda. A William Cobb woodie with a super-interesting layout and a super-bad reputation. However, the park has recently put quite a bit of work into it, and that reputation needs to be reexamined. Sure, it's not particularly wild, but it's very smooth. How smooth? Well, I started with a front seat ride to get a feel for it, and then happily hopped into a wheel seat towards the back--which was also good. This ride is tons of fun! I mean, it doesn't really have airtime or significant laterals or anything, but it's certainly not the second-worst coaster in Europe or whatever. Great job, Walygator! I skipped this, but Misty loved it! Here you can see her having convinced the poor Walygator PR guy to ride with her. If Anaconda is not intense, it's only because this ride has sucked all the intensity to itself. I'm not sure that makes sense, but basically this is Raptor except somebody forgot to install brakes on the mid-course brake platform, resulting in a first half of Raptor-ish intensity, followed by a second half of holy-crap-Raptor-is-a-kiddie-ride intensity. I respect it, but once was enough for me. It wasn't part of the plan, but Smisty asked Elissa if she could talk the park into letting her by a stuffed Waly Gator. So they opened up a gift shop for us. Now, I had pretty much convinced Misty to buy a gator that would fit into her bag. But then Elissa (who is now dead to me) was all Satanic-influence with, "Hey, they opened this gift shop for, you have to get the big one!" But it gets worse. See, Misty was then talking to one of the park managers and thanked him for opening up the gift shop so she could buy a stuffed alligator, and he responded by gifting her a frigging Monster road wheel. Happily, they also gave 9 other wheels to the group, and I'm pretty sure that everyone who wanted one got one, so I'm not the only one who knows the joy of trying to get what (out of context) looks a bit like part of a nuclear reactor through airport security. But hold on, there's lots more parks before we start worrying about heading home! Our first day at Europa began with ERT on the indoor CanCan Coaster, followed by Silver Star (in the rain). CanCan Coaster (inside the golf ball) was fun and well-themed, though the restraints/seat horns weren't entirely ideal for me. Still, I rode it three times (once with the lights on) so they weren't that bad. I liked Silver Star a lot, despite a bit of rattle. That rattle was a deal-breaker for Misty, though. And yes, the golf ball is rather Epcot-like--except they put a roller coaster in it. Good artists borrow. Great artists steal. Now on our own, we headed for the park's newest dark ride, Arthur. But, really, Arthur is more than a dark ride. It's an indoor/outdoor powered coaster dark ride with a whole indoor area built around it. And it's great. We rode it 3 or 4 times over our 2 days at Europa, which required some effort and commitment considering how popular it is. I honestly had no idea that Europa had a fairy tell walk-through and push-button area! See, after the last trip, I was left with a conundrum: did I prefer Efteling or Gröna Lund? Thankfully, I now have an answer: I prefer Europa. Look, they even have self-operated rides! (Well, one. ) It pretty much rained the entire first day. But that was fine by me! It kept it from getting too hot and scared most of the locals away. No lightning, though. So we rode lots of stuff, including some water rides--including this splash battle, which also had indoor dark ride sections. Because everything at Europa is a dark ride. Of course, the weather wasn't ideal for photography. But that just gives me an excuse for my crappy photos! So, again, a win. This powered coaster intertwines with the log flume and then they both intertwine inside a man-made mountain along with a walk-though attraction about elven slave-labor gem mining. The nice gentleman working the log flume asked if we wanted to stay on and ride again and we did. Is a dive show in the middle of a water ride safer if the guy misses the pool or less safe? There was a small language barrier with the guy in the ice cream shop on account of the fact that I am an American and do not speak any other languages secure in the knowledge that I will never need to understand any other culture and his English was only almost perfect. But it did result in this amazing waffle cone sundae thing and my new motto: "Yes to everything." Actually, this might be the park's newest dark ride: Snorri Touren. It's easy to find as it's located in a basement through a random door in the Scandinavian section of the park. And Misty had a stuffy of Snorri shipped to us in the states months before we visited this park. Josefina's Magical Imperial Journey might be the snootiest name for a ride ever. It also has a fascinating narrative, in that it's utterly unburdened by conflict or adversity. Basically, a princess meets a prince, their respective families approve, everything is what it seems, they get married, and everything is wonderful. See? They don't just rip off Disney. We didn't eat at Food Loop because Elissa said the food was bad. But I don't why I should listen to her "buy the big gator" slander. Oh right, the line was also long. Looks like I'll trust her opinion after all and just take a photo instead. I'm told that folks around these parts like pictures of roller coasters. So here are two in one photo. Can I go back to pictures of foliage now? Wodan is my new favorite GCI, by the way, and probably the best coaster I rode on this trip. For anyone who doesn't know, Europa Park was ostensibly started as a showcase for Mack Rides. But there's clearly more to it then that. Indoor spinning ride? Check. Okay, I do have one minor complaint. This is a Mack water coaster. Essentially, it's the same ride type as Journey to Atlantis at SeaWorld Orlando. Except what's cool about that ride is that it's a log flume and a dark ride and a coaster. This is just out in the open, and mostly unthemed (outside of the station). Which is doubly odd as everything at Europa is a dark ride. Except this, which really should be. It's like, a duck is cool because it can walk and swim and fly. But a duck just walking is kind of lame. Get a goat or a cheetah or something. I insist that this is a perfect analogy and will not hear otherwise. By my count, Europa has 6 proper dark rides. Including this one, Geisterschloss, which roughly translates to "Moist Cattle." I'm sorry, that should've been "Clothed Hassle." Damned auto-correct. This ride is just a bunch of things that Germans think Italians are into, but it ends with a gelato room, so I like it. And also the Russian dark ride is worse because it's so much about snow and ice and cold that penguins actually show up at the end. But those all pale in comparison to this one. As near as I can figure--and I did zero research but don't correct me--there was an existing dinosaur themed ride but they wanted to retheme whatever this section of the park was before to France and this was how they bridged the gap: an old French women collects weird things, including and mostly consisting of live dinosaurs. The best part of this ride was that a live squirrel wandered into it and was just as confused about the whole situation as I was. Ireland is the park's kid section, which seems kind of insulting if you're Irish...? Except that when I say "kid section" I actually mean completely awesome family section filled with more tracked outdoor scenic rides than I can count. I mean, I would give a lot of parks half credit for having a dark ride if they had anything half as good as any one of these indoor/outdoor scenic rides, and this area has like 4 or 5 of them. And also one of those Lindt chocolate stores that Ireland is so famous for. God, I love Europa so much. But mostly because I'm not Irish. This nightmarishly-themed water cups ride is called (and I'm not making this up) "Puppet Boat Ride." Note that the sign in the background reads "CIRCUS MACK'S IMUS" because Mack. Old Mac Donald's Tractor Fun Yes, that's its actual name. Note the observation tower in the background, as we're going there next. I am the master of transitions. You know how people are always like, "They should have benches in the queue." Well, these crazy bastards went and did it. Also, Misty representing. Her favorite ride manufacturer was Mack before we went to Europa. Yes, she likes this park, A view from the observation tower of the 3 coasters we'll have ERT on the following day. Back to our on-site hotel, El Andaluz. A large contingent of the group headed to Europa's new indoor waterpark, Rulantica, for the evening. But we're old and tired and I'm under court order not to be seen in a bathing suit. This tapas at the hotel restaurant was so good we ended up going back and getting it again the next evening. Yes, we got this two nights in a row, also. The big bed is for gauchos and donkeys. The top bunk is for little boys. The bottom bunk is for maracas. Day 2 started with ERT on Euro-Mir. This was Mack's prototype spinning coaster. It's kind of weird, it doesn't free spin, and some of the transitions are a bit...Arrow. But I like weird, the spiral disco lift and the mirrored towers are fun, and it's not overly painful. I rode twice, once experiencing the bulk of the ride forwards, and once experiencing the bulk of the ride backwards. So I figure I pretty much got the full experience. I'd hate for them to get rid of this ride. But I also feel like they could do better now. Maybe like a full-scale revamp/refurb? Make it spin freely and reprofile some of those transitions? I'd say they might just go full Ride to Happiness, but I don't think Mack wants really extreme rides in their park. Still, they have two water coasters, so who knows? Voletarium is their flying theater ride. You know, like Soarin'. But when was the last time you rode Soarin' and there wasn't a seam or a blemish on the screen or a bit of trash at the bottom? Everything at Europa works. Buttons actually activate things, screens are pristine, animatronics move like they're supposed to, operations are top notch, and policies actually make sense. Also, the transitions were really good. (I hate smash cuts.) And the ending? Oh yeah, you end at Europa with fireworks going off. I don't carry a big camera. I just use my phone. Both because I want to travel light, and because I don't want to fall into focusing so much on photography that I miss out on just , you know, experiencing things. But I did want to bip out the front gate for some quick photos of the park entrance and Silver Star. So here's an example of what I was talking about before. If you leave the park, and wish to return that same day, there's an automated system that takes your photo and attaches it to your ticket. Now, obviously, that's to prevent people from giving their tickets to others. But, you just know that if a US park were to do something like this, they'd make everyone attach their photo upon initial entry. But why? Most people don't leave in the middle of the day and come back again. So Europa only does it when it matters. And, yes, I suppose you could go with a traditional handstamp instead, but kids were defeating that when I was a kid, and I'm old as dirt. A small Mack/Europa museum at the front of the park. And a much weirder "Narrenscheune Museum" (whatever that is). Just a weird garden-y section near the front of the park. I imagine that a lot of people miss it. And again, this park is so much more than just a Mack Rides showroom. How am I supposed to drive this thing?! The steering wheel is on the wrong side!? Also, there are no guns on this thing! That's like an America joke, right? I have no idea. I'm way too handsome to be an ugly American. Sex joke...? Wait, maybe this is the park's newest dark ride. Yes, it's a Pirates of the Caribbean rip off. But really, I think of it as more of a companion piece. Like, I honestly think you'd enjoy it more if you were already familiar with PotC. Quality-wise, it's pretty much on par (or maybe just a slight notch below) but has much more of an Asian-vibe. Or, to put it another way, how can you improve Pirates of the Caribbean? If your answer is "add a tiger," then this ride might be for you! Honestly, what kind of lunatic makes an otter in a tiny pirate costume walk the plank? Is this theming Disney quality? I dunno, I'm not that into Disney. This is good enough for me, though. Raclette. The hype is real. Was excited to see this football bumper car thing, but it's apparently been replaced by some kind of virtual garbage. Boo. How about some ERT on my new favorite GCI? It's just so good. Plus, no seat belts, so operations are lightning fast. Speaking of which: This story is second hand, but I don't think anyone would object to my paraphrasing it here. Essentially, the ides is that Europa feels that they have to have excellent operations because they want to sell these rides to other parks, and they don't want those parks to think they make low-capacity rides. Of course, this isn't a Mack ride, so I guess maybe they just want to take care of their guests, as well. Everything is a dark ride. I haven't really talked too much about Blue Fire. I dug it. The restraints were mostly pretty okay for me, but that last hangtime inversion was a little owie, so I stopped after about 3 rides. Still, that's a pretty decent amount for me. In fact, I rode all 5 of their big coasters 2-4 times. There really wasn't one that I rode once and was done with. Which, if you know me, is pretty good. We asked Robb and Elissa if they could just leave us here, but apparently Europa insisted that we go experience some other German parks...? Seems a bit insulting, but I guess we have to respect their wishes. Anyway, is Europa the best park in the world? Well, I haven't been to every park in the world, and we still have 10 more parks to talk about from this trip, so technically it's too early to say. But yes.

Glad you guys are getting so stoked for another new turn-around for Timber Wolf.

We have to hand back the compliment! It was a pleasure to spend the time with you!

I think for those wondering if this is an RMC or GCI it should be noted GCI did comment on this and also confirmed they won't be working on it on their Facebook page. With a send off post of sorts to their first creation, everything says RMC and let's be honest, any hope of GCI doing a titan track recreation is out the window. I mean, you gotta look at this from a business perspective. Go with GCI who is known for their wooden coasters now to replace their first prototype design that's largely agreed that's horrible now? Or go with a proven manufacturer that is guaranteed to be a huge success for the region? I get why people hoped for a GCI conversion, but it would of been a poor business decision on Hershey's part only for the sake of nostalgic. I would hold hopes out for a smaller park willing to take the discount on a prototype. I could really see Funspot or similar doing this, but even they opted for an RMC over GCI's new product for their next major coaster.

GREAT start to the trip report. . . loved it, and sad that I missed going out the front gate of Europa - there just wasn't enough time! So I love seeing your pictures, as that area looks lovely. I did make it to the Soarin ride - I liked it too - and the Berlin Wall piece, but never out the front gate. . so it really makes me sad I missed it (but thrilled to see it in your pics). also agree that Woodan was my favorite wooden coaster of the trip (tho some did come close to snagging that spot. . Woodan took my heart and I did every ERT ride, plus a few extras). And I was blown away by how smooth Anaconda was! as you noted, not the most exciting, but it was pretty smooth and a fun ride. Loved that Wallygator was so kind to us, and were willing to open up after Robb approached them! was so nice meeting y'all and can't wait to see the rest of your report!

So what you're saying is Velocicoaster is better?

Did you bring a notepad with you? I don't understand all of the clientele comments. Are people specifically looking for a certain demographic to judge, or is it across the board? It's one thing to be comically critical of parks, but there seems to be a growing trend of self righteous coaster enthusiasts. It's the worst kind of toxicity.

In the context of the RMC era, Maverick doesn't hit quite as hard as it used to, but I remember my first ride being a total shock to the system. Maverick was a big risk to take at the apex of the Coaster Wars and it disrupted the whole industry because nobody else was doing that.

Got back from a recent trip to Ohio to visit the two Cedar Fair parks in the area (along with other miscellany). I visited Cedar Point for Tuesday, July 5th after waking up early to drive across the state from Cincinnati the morning of (I had rearranged a decent portion of my travel plans last minute). I still got to the park entrance near opening. My adherence to my ridiculously tight schedule probably wasn't necessary as Cedar Point's crowds were very reasonable on that day, and I think the longest line that I waited for at the park was the drop coaster Valravn at 45 minutes followed by Maverick at 30 minutes. I think the rest of the rides I went on were well under 15 minute waits. Overall, I got one ride on every major rollercoaster and two rides on Steel Vengeance. However, I don't feel like I fell in love with any of the attractions. All of them felt reasonably well designed and thrilling, but I preferred Kings Island's more eclectic lineup. Miscellaneous Major Rides Thoughts Cedar Creek Mine Ride - I typically love Arrow Mine trains for how quirky they are, but Cedar Creek Mine Ride doesn't really use the terrain at all which makes it inescapably obvious how bland the ride layout is. It also was down for much of the day. Steel Vengeance - I thought that the mandatory locker system was fine, and the trains were able to leave the station full. However, I experienced the ride in the early morning on a relatively uncrowded day, and I am sure that the locker situation is much more unmanageable with decent crowds. I rode the ride once in the middle and once in the back. Honestly, Steel Vengeance is intense enough that I don't feel like I need to be picky about seat selection. It's probably my favorite ride at Cedar Point by default as it gives a long intense ride that is smooth enough to be re-ridable. Raptor - I was very confused by how the employee on the station platform was doing seat assignments. They would fill up the entirety of the front row line before assigning people to the rest of the train. On the one hand, this policy wasn't the best at filling in empty spaces on the trains which is bad for throughput, but on the other hand, it does mean that I ended up getting a front, middle seat, which probably helped since I generally don't like B&M inverts. Maverick - I think my expectations were too high for Maverick given all the hype, especially since I rode this immediately after Steel Vengeance. Plus the throughput probably isn't as good as other rides in the park making the lines longer. The ride also seemed to break down a bit during my visit, but I don't think that is unusual for Maverick. Theming While the areas near the back of the park have a decently charming western theme, the front of the park feels exceptionally bland. Cedar Point definitely feels like a boring corporate regional park. It somehow doesn't feel like Cedar Point takes advantage of its lakeside location - probably because the waterfront isn't really that visible from the park's paths. Food I ate at Hugo's Italian Kitchen at the front of the park and had one of the crustiest, driest chicken parmesan sandwich that I have ever had in my life. I suspect that other park food options were better, but by this time in my vacation, I was really tired of all of the carbs and proteins that I had been consuming on my vacation (Ohio doesn't have the most diverse food scene in the world) and was happy to have the side salad that came with my meal. Operations I thought that the operations were fine - good even. The park seems to be very strict about loose articles (and glasses) and doesn't offer station bins on its attractions, which probably helps throughput. I sort of suspect that the real issue that people have with the park is that it is too popular for the types of policies that Cedar Fair loves to inflict on its parks. Clientele I was actually bracing for the worst after some of the issues that I had at Kings Island on previous days, as I assumed that Cedar Point was less geared towards families and more geared towards teens due to its lineup of thrill rides, but it was actually fine. I didn't have any problems with the kids at this park. I am not sure if that is a demographic thing, or a midweek visit thing. I noticed that some of the elderly guests were riding the major thrill coasters, which I thought was odd but also pretty cool.

SAVE TEH DEMON! But really, I do love the Demon. Ours in Chicagoland, anyway. It's the better of the 2 - recording and eyes in lift tunnel, 1980 snap drop intact, disco tunnel, Demon caves, fog in mouth. And no friggin seatbelt things. I guess California will lose it's 3D logos on the train fronts, we lost ours decades ago. Such a shame about Great America... makes me more grateful for ours and that we have many of our classics such as 2 flumes, a Whizzer. I know CF runs the park so well, I wonder what the public will say.

Lots of that for sure but there is some good info around here now and again

"New and unique elements throughout the park enhance the summer fun for guests with new decor elements like the all-new Kite Sky, unexpected splash and play elements, colorful kids play activities in The Village, a bubble foam party in Wilderness Pass, and an unparalleled and interactive art installation that invites guests to spin on life-size tops in Wildwood Grove." I saw a picture on their FB page, but can't find it now - looks like its been pulled down. So - BITCHY - I saw it... didn't post it yet and now it's gone. I was asking if anyone else saw it and had thoughts about it. This site is pretty much pointless now - no one actually has any productive discussion, just unnecessary comments that the poster "thinks" are funny.

^That's a bummer to hear, I really need the parks to get back to where they were pre-pandemic!

Congratulations! You are today's winner of the Alanis Morissette Not Actually Irony Award! LOL I had writers block when I was writing that. My mind went blank as I was searching for the perfect word. Time was lacking and my gut instinct was to use the word "funny". But I decided to try and find something different thus coming up with "ironic" at the last moment. Bad choice of words, my bad. I'm 40 years old and therefore resting up on the knowledge I once gained from the english classes I learned in school. Secondly, hearing all these Trump speeches doesn't help either.

It needs to be replaced with a more reliable B&M Hyper by 2025. Turn the train approach out of the station around & put the lift hill going out over the employee parking lot to run a longer course. Put a fork in LROD already...it's done.

Just a warning for anyone going to the park and getting there in the morning. Apparently there is only 1 security screening area opening, no trams running and it's causing 2+ hour waits to get in. This has been happening multiple times in the past week. Thread from reddit: https://reddit.com/r/BuschGardensTampa/comments/vv4zt4/line_to_get_inside_of_the_park/ Seeing those pictures makes me glad I almost always visit later in the afternoon or early evening when there is no line to enter. Also Cobra's Curse has been closed since at least Thursday.