Photo TR: Dan Smith's WDW Birthday Bash Stunt Spectacular

[dandaman]

"How soon hath Time, the subtle thief of youth,

Stolen on his wing my eighteenth year!"

 

Well, it's time for another WDW photo TR, straight from my twisted mind to your desktop. Brace yourselves for all of the joygasms that are sure to be experienced by all Disney fans, and also purveyors of shameless puns and that's-what-she-said jokes.

 

For 18 years I've made it a point to let my parents know that I'm the only family member who hasn't celebrated their birthday at Disney; February just wasn't a convenient time for me to pop out of a vagina, apparently. So, as calculated and intentional corporate luck would have it, Disney decided to give me a free pass for my 18th birthday this year. Besides my awesome day at the Magic Kingdom on the 12th, I was at Epcot for Valentine's Day, and in between I took a campus tour at (my official new place of residence as of August) Florida Tech, which is like more awesome than Vader driving in a Delorean playing "Don't Stop Me Now" with a nuclear explosion in the background.

 

Let's see you figure THAT one out, Einstein.

 

So, without further delay and slightly more entertaining blocks of text, I present my Floridian travels.

...Oh, fine. Preview picture.

Presenting my Pin of Ultimate Power which would be responsible for 62 b-day greetings the following day.

 

I hate to cut off here, seeing as how there's no actual park action yet... and I know how you hate it as well... but bear with me for a day and you won't regret it. The Birthday Bash Stunt Spectacular starts in just 24 hours!

I found a Blatant Mickey!

...And the nephews are playing a decidedly different sport.

Thought this was funny... Donald's waiting for the serve...

America's "super-sizing" craze is getting freaking ridiculous.

"That's no moon... that's a long fly ball to left field!"

"Colour! Number! Random saying! HIKE!"

I stayed at the "Star Spor" for the next couple of nights...

Since my sister wouldn't see me on my actual birthday, she made me an awesome card... and I'm sure only Disney/coaster enthusiasts would understand the acronym.

Our bitchin' ride for the week. Silver Mazda 5. Pretty decent if the air conditioning worked.

30 seconds earlier: "JOCK! START THE PLANE! START IT!"

Sorry, even if you DO pet this, I have no Bag 'O Crap to send you.

1. I finally escaped 15-below weather.

2. It's actually really freakin' windy up there.

3. I asked for raspberry lemonade but instead they gave me raspberry iced tea, which wasn't that bad anyway.

4. That photo looks nothing like me.

Canadian pirates unite!

 

"And it's a heave-ho, hi-ho, comin' down the plains,

Stealin' wheat 'n barley 'n all the other grains!

And it's a ho-hey, hi-hey, farmers bar yer doors,

When ya see the Jolly Roger on Regina's mighty shores!"

No one ever travels to see the Leaning Tower of St. Pete...

Good. It's good to know I've arrived. Thought I was having an out-of-body experience. (13 minutes early, too.)

"Welcome to Tampa, where the local time is... DAMN you, Dali!"

For all those Tampa Airport POV enthusiasts of which I'm certain exist out there...

The shot that no other traveller has.

Tunes all set.

All you Losties out there can imagine how wary I was of my seat number...

...And yes, in case you were wondering, I share my birthday with Mr. Stovepipe up there. My 18th was his 200th. (I was also born in Lincoln Hospital in Lincoln, Ontario. Seriously. Surprised I wasn't named Abe.)

We're gonna start this out right... getting RCITR II for a present was great enough, but those random guidemaps from all corners of the globe (globes have corners?) were icing on the ice-cream cake.

[mcjaco]

 

So we started the day by seeing each other, and you were just in front of us during wishes?

[dandaman]

Actually, that was taken after Wishes... I was at the back of the park right between the Speedway and the Toontown sign, on my stomach, trying to set up my tripod to take some decent shots of the pyro off the train flatcar.

 

Currently working on MK...

[dandaman]

It begins...

The weather enthusiast in me appreciates the fact that I looked up to see this.

 

Part II will come in a few hours, so go do something... eat... sleep... have sex... I really don't care. But be prepared to interrupt all three when Part II is posted!

This would be an awesome Old West iron-horse shot if it wasn't a roller coaster. Or an artificial mountain.

The Big Thunder Mining Company doesn't instill me with a lot of confidence.

No trains in one shot!

Ooooh, alternate view.

A goat on a roof? I thought those existed only in European mountain towns! Or on the walls of Applebee's!

This is what cartoon characters see when they try robbing a train: a comically-placed heavy or sharp object.

Brace yourself for temporal displacement!

Switch track enthusiasts the world over just creamed their pants.

Can you tell I love BTM? (Fill in your own acronym.)

Celebrate improper grammar!

...I don't think they're sure.

Raise your hands... if you're sure!

Celebrate white balance! (With respect to the Bryan and Adam Show)

It's probably Big Thunder Mountain. Or it could be Big-Titty Mamas. I vote the latter.

This would be better with the lamp lit...

Best I could get on the fly.

For the surprising amount of TPR train buffs.

Oh, yeah, and I caught this hidden... thing... outside of Tony's. Celebrate 1950's Disney references!

...OK, I can see the mini-parade going once, but this is the third time in 90 minutes I've seen it. Foot traffic issues much?

This is a Dan-approved birthday dessert!

Tony's also popped my gelato cherry! (Though it's not a cherry gelato.)

If anyone goes to Tony's, get the spaghetti with Italian sausage instead of meatballs... you get two whole full-sized sausages! I could barely finish half of the meal!

And so, upon turning 18, I sat down to an equally dignified meal.

 

...OMG OMG OMG CONFETTI EVERYWHERE

Rollin' in my '71

I'm still waiting for a "Great Moments With Mr. Disney" Animatronic attraction to make its way into the parks.

Awwww...

Hurry! We can still catch the...

Disney Corporation meetings are serious business.

OMG... Ollie LIVES! [/companyreference]

Plus I got acknowledged by Robin Williams himself!

Elissa's friends even said hi.

Kinda cool to have a parade with giant gift boxes premiere on my birthday...

My Delorean allowed me to jump four days into the future, play some mini-golf here, take a picture of a pirate ship and insert it into the same part of the TR. I'm an f'ing genius.

"Dead men tell no tales!"

 

"What about over at that mansion?"

 

"...Shut up, wench."

"...Have ya ever, like, looked at your hand? I mean really LOOKED at it."

 

(He would later find out that rum makes a poor substitute for munchies.)

"And actually, I've got a question for you, love..."

"...No ma'am, I'm not actually Johnny Depp. Please stop asking."

More Canadian piracy!

 

"A swingin' sword, a skull-and-bones, and pleasant company;

I never pay my income tax and screw the GST!

Prince Albert down to Saskatoon, the terror of the sea...

If you wanna reach the co-op, boy, you gotta get by me!

See, you can tell this isn't a TPR lunch... no meat-on-a-stick.

"World's Most Inaccurate Road Map"

Anyone else ever wonder what happened to the rest of the tree? Damn loggers.

Hey ladies... care to play my organ?

I've never hiked the Swiss Family Treehouse before... but yeah, 'twas kinda lame. Not many views besides foliage and more foliage. And "Bad Tiki Room".

...OK, if I actually had a Bag 'O Crap to send, I might do it if you post a picture of you attempting to devour this. Dole Whip > Strawberry Swirl

Celebrate that guy!

Celebrate MILF!

 

(This is actually a pretty awesome show! Though it'd be lame but the amazing technology even made it possible to make pop culture jokes. Sweeeet.)

Watch out, ladies... I'm quite experienced at scoring.

Celebrate semi-hidden Mickeys!

Trolley Show guy gave me a really big, really invisible birthday present on the way in.

...But can I celebrate tomorrow?

Celebrate Myspace stalker photos!

 

(And yes, I took this BEFORE I actually met him. Just to make sure I wasn't hallucinating the TPR bit. Everyone say hi to "mcjaco"!)

...NO, dammit, I've been 18 for a half-hour now!!!

Happy birth-time to me...

...With a strategically-placed American Idol Experience GMA cameo. This is the kind of weathercasting I want to do... toting around the country with a little weather on the side!

[Electerik]

Nice TR (so far). It looks like you put extra effort into your captions!

 

Lots of good shots of BTMRR, too.

[gotdane]

Loved the Big-Titty Mamas shots! Can't wait for more!

[dandaman]

Part II... you can stop having sex now. Just sayin'.

So overall a pretty awesome birthday... crowds were kinda thick but all the great CM's and surprises (and very-mini-TPR meet!) were more than enough to make my 18th the best one yet.

 

More action from Epcot later, but tomorrow, a sidetrip to my future campus, Florida Tech! (I *ahem* GREATLY appreciate any and all comments!)

One final Main Street Station-based shot for good measure.

Classical joygasm

I saw two whole people in Tomorrowland about 15 minutes after Wishes... if you want some good night shots I recommend sticking around a bit.

Elissa's rodent friends got bronzed.

Only two months 'till Earth Day, people! Get recycling or else Captain Planet will kill you in your sleep!

Best castle shot I could get with a flat surface.

Aaaaand freeze-finish!

The D.S.D.B.B.S.S. proudly presents Wishes! in glorious Blur-O-Vision 3000.

"...All right, who's the wiseass who put a Delorean on the Speedway? Also, where the hell has Ryan been?"

Holy f***in' asscrackers! Whatever Dumbo's on, STAY AWAY from it!

"Now which four of you are gonna be responsible for the end of the world?"

Poor Sir Topham Hatt. All they found after the meltdown was his namesake.

...Oh, wait, it's just Pegasus escaping from the APOCALYPSE CAROUSEL!

Celebrate the Rapture!

Instant nighttime, just add Michael Bay!

A lot more castle pics to come shortly.

Cinderella Castle... THROUGH THE HEDGES!

If this is what people are comparing Disneyland Paris' castle grounds to... I really wanna visit Disneyland Paris!

...All right, fine. Here's ONE decent shot of myself that I'll post, but that's ALL you'll... oh, right, the gelato.

Celebrate Walt references!

 

(This is what Mickey would look like if he watched Matlock and yelled at kids to get off his cartoon lawn.)

No trains in one shot AGAIN! I'm just that damn good.

Hot logo action!

#3 Roger E. Broggie goes so fast, it's a blur. Yep. Nothing whatsoever to do with my unsteady hand.

Aaaaaand back to music!

Flag starting to be lowered by a member of the Army.

I love me some instrumental bands.

I'd never seen the flag-raising ceremony; it was a nice surprise. (And my camera went from out-of-commission to beautiful photos in one shot.)

Celebrate Disney concert music! ("Hidden" Mickeys in the corner, too.)

Drop shot fail

I've always liked the word 'elixir'...

This is about one second before the water cannons decided to break my camera for an hour, though about 15 minutes AFTER it got wet in the first place... it really ISN'T a Dan-friendly water ride!

The following will be presented in Briarvision 2-D.

THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID

[cprocks22]

Awesome TR so far, well I'm pretty much a sucker for ANY Disney TR but still, great pictures. I believe I got the same card for my birthday last year...its one of the ones that has sound correct?

[dandaman]

Sure is. I haven't even seen it at any of the card shops... you ever walked into Hallmark just to see what funny cards they have with no intention of making a purchase? That's usually me. Funny how my parents pick out the one card I've never seen.

[Jayjay719]

Awesome trip report so far! I have only been to Disney once and it was when I was little. Go figure...I want to go back so bad. But your pictures are helping me with that so thanks. Also...I go into Hallmark all the time and read those cards with sounds. Yet I don't buy any lol. Anyway I'm looking forward to the rest of your trip report.

[the ghost]

This is an awesome TR so far. The castle at night looks simply awesome, so does ours. Just out of comparison(if you or someone in this thread has been to DLR, how do the fireworks compare.) I just remember Illuminations(that's the show at Epcot, correct?) and, although I was only in second grade, the show was stunning.

[Chrissie]

Great TR! I really love you castle pictures and your ones of Walt and Mickey. Looking forward to seeing the rest!

 

Oh and Happy Birthday!

[Not For Sale]

Love it. Shoot me a PM next time you're in town.

[dandaman]

Thanks, guys! Oh, and Bryan, I might be better to avoid you for a couple of weeks for fear of being dragged into the Idol audition.

 

ghost, I haven't ever been west of the Mississippi but I desparately want to go out to California. (California Zephyr, anyone?) Based on video I've seen of DL's fireworks, which is never a good substitute for actually being there, theirs seems to be a bit better IMO. However, like I mentioned before I'm a huge fan of classical/film/anything-that-tells-a-story music, so Illuminations gets my vote as the best nighttime show in the U.S.

[Erik Johnson]

One of the best MK trip reports I have seen. Thanks for posting.

[dandaman]

Mini-update from the Atlantic Coast. Sadly no park action today, but I did end up touring (and officially signing up for) university next year at Florida Tech, of which I am so excited for it's insane. For landmark purposes, it's about a 45-minute drive from the Space Center, meaning every time a shuttle launches the sky lights up like a hundred 4th-of-July's at once. (Almost as cool as that Vader-in-a-Delorean scenario.) Anyway, I'd be going into the lucrative field of meteorology, so let's hope in a few years you'll see me on your hotel TV when you're on vacation in Florida. Hopefully not telling you that a hurricane is coming to destroy you, but still...

If you don't tune in for tomorrow's Epcot segment, you are WAKKIE NU NU!

The beach is under 10 minutes' drive from campus. This is already an improvement over Canaba as no matter how close you are to the beach, it's either closed due to E. coli or too damn cold to wear a light jacket let alone flip-flops.

I want this rug.

Theme park tie-in! It was rumoured a couple of years back that Animal Kingdom was willing to pay a five-figure sum to have this unusual cluster of trees in the park; all of the trees appear to be coming from the same root. The rumour had since been disproven, though.

This is either the recreation center or one of the engineering buildings...

The Crawford building was designed to look like a shuttle on the launch pad, and I guess with all the aspiring technicians running around campus the image is pretty believable.

This is a library. Libraries have books in them. This one has three floors of books. Yep.

I think I'm in love.

...Holy crap, this is a university?! This is the memorial garden on campus, appropriately nicknamed the Jungle. Sure as hell beats a foot of snow walking to classes (uphill both ways) in Canaba!

Meet Zeke. Zeke was found one day by a student who thought this particular tree stump had a discernible face, so students carved it to make Zeke's features stand out more.

This is part of a larger complex which was nearing completion in early 2003 when the Columbia shuttle disaster occurred. Student council unanimously decided to name it Columbia Village, with each of the buildings named after one of the seven astronauts on the final mission. Florida Tech was originally founded as NASA's official place for educating their employees, so you can imagine how closely tied the campus remains today with the space program.

rawr

Celebrate post-secondary education in paradise!

[revilolee]

Great trip report! Haven't been to Disney in almost 2 years. Looks like you're having fun over there, and I can't wait to see more.

[dandaman]

What better thing to do on Valentine's Day than honor your passion for Epcot?

And that's all he wrote from Epcot. There's a few more various ones I'll post tomorrow, but if you're a Disney fan, I cordially invite you to stop reading now. (If you were ever reading before. Damn.)

 

Any comments still appreciated, even if they're bad!

Little-known fact: All Mark IV monorails come equipped with tractor beams.

Celebrate 11,324 Alucobond triangles!

More Mission: Sinise.

Whatever amount of bright signs you show me, I still want my World of Motion back.

Canaba: Dark six months out of the year. Frozen beyond all reason the other six.

This section is brought to you by Transition lenses.

Went to ESPN Club to get a foot-long hot dog. Usually you have to go to Castro Street for that. So I hear.

Yep... still there.

"...I could be yours, too."

 

Happy Valentine's Day Wes!

"Y'arrr, I be Wes' butt-pirate, and Wes' butt-pirate only!

 

Just kiddin'..."

This portion of the show is brought to you by Wes' eternal love interest. And Rice-A-Roni.

Da-da-da-da, da-daaaaa... BAAAAAARGE!

The French always make their cheeses even more authentic by adding hidden Mickeys.

 

(Is it pathetic to see someone photographing their cheese? I've been around coaster enthusiasts a long time so I can't tell anymore.)

You don't mind if I put this in here, do you? Thanks, you're all right.

Speaking of balance... I liked this mostly for the Michael Giacchino Ratatouille background music.

France: World-renowned for its theatres, wineries, and white balance.

Celebrate 16x optical zoom!

If they sold SSE balloons I would so buy one. Or a dozen and sell them to other fanboys for extortionate prices. (Yet still lower than "Disney retail price".)

Yeah, I know it's the same as a picture I took last August (shameless plug #1) but I still like it.

This is exactly what Florida Tech looks like on a launch day. Yep.

No joke, the American Adventure is my favourite attraction in the entire park.

Blatant Mickey sighting!

Celebrate more live instrumental bands!

This pavillion needs more Happy Valley.

It's always nighttime in Mexico. Always.

My favourite shot of the trip. Scott/Matt's springtime desktop wallpaper, perhaps?

Couple o' flower pics

I don't think SSE gets the concept of hide-and-go-seek.

I'm REALLY glad they didn't touch the mural during the rehab. Now we need a more dramatic Patrick Stewart-narrated script and we're good. (Descent? What descent?)

Celebrate dedication plaques!

[dandaman]

...More or less ending with a whimper instead of a bang. Not as much viewership than what the August one got, but I appreciate any and all of you who did manage to come in here and post comments and all that jazz!

That's all, folks! *Looney Tunes fade-wipe*

 

...Damn. Still here. Anyway, like I said, I wholeheartedly thank all of you who've been traipsing through this (and possibly other) TR's full of crude humour and nearly-impossible pop-culture references. 'Till next time, TPR!

Passing by the frickin' HUGE Florida State Fair and not going > listening to the Jonas Brothers for over five seconds.

These guys were from Thunder Bay, Ontario. As you can see, they are performing a traditional Canabian dance which we stole from the clutches of Hungary like 100 years ago.

My first-ever Disney ride back in the day. Presumably that day being around early May 1994.

Tasty, tasty plastic.

AT&Squawk: More bars in more places.

San Francisco is of course widely known for their chocolate.

[Sir Clinksalot]

Great stuff.

 

I'm totally having FL Withdrawals. It's been 1 1/2 years (almost) since we've been.

[robbalvey]

The Crawford building was designed to look like a shuttle on the launch pad, and I guess with all the aspiring technicians running around campus the image is pretty believable.

 

 

I dunno man, I'm just not seeing it. It kind of looks more like the Holiday Inn at Downtown Disney:

[mcjaco]

We can officially mark this thread as having the first stalker shot of me.

[dandaman]

^I swear I only took it as a "reference point"!

 

^^ That just opens up too many possibilities...

 

Navigator: We're saved, Commander!

 

Guy: Actually, I'm not even an astronaut, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.

[BeemerBoy]

Celebrate another awesome WDW trip report from you. And a belated happy birthday as well!

[dandaman]

Thanks, Scott! By the way, I didn't even have a Monorgasmic experience this time around... originally I wanted my b-day dinner to be at O-"Meat-On-A-Stick"-hana's but they were all booked, so we never ended up needing the Mark VI Express.

Some hot full-frontal action just for you, though! (And maybe Matt. Maybe)