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Do you think you can handle more Shanghai madness? Are you prepared for what may be the trippiest attraction since Nights in White Satin: The Ride? If not, look away now! You have been warned. Welcome to Luxun Park. One of my biggest fans was there. (Ha! I am on fire! Or maybe I should just be set on fire for that one. Sorry.) I think the guy who was doing the gymnastics on the bar here has strong kung fu. Or maybe he's about to fall on his head. There was some sort of "festival of lights" going on at the park. Of course, it's a bit hard to appreciate in broad daylight. "Rub mah belly, yankee dog!" Lucha libre! (Actually, they're masks from Chinese opera, which probably doesn't involve body slamming people or ramming them into turnbuckles.) This is part of a very long sculpture of a dragon made entirely out of dinner plates. How long to you think such a sculpture would last in the U.S.? Behold the splendor of the Gliding Dragon--which is not made out of dinner plates. We went to yet another Peoples Park. I think. Another park, another Gliding Dragon. There was an enormous mall across the street--and it had a Carl's Jr.! Western Bacon Cheeseburger! Hot damn! And now, our last park of the day. Hmm--I guess an inactive bike could be said to be "fallow." Or perhaps, in China, bikes grow like weeds in fallow fields? I don't see any bikes sprouting out here. Nice flowers, though. And now, "The Curious Incident of the Coaster with a Wedgie." Cheryl and Divv were spared the horror of this occurrence. But others were not so lucky. "Aw, crap! It's happened again. Best get to pokin', pushin', and pullin'!" I'm pretty sure that this procedure is in the Golden Horse operator's manual for this attraction. Good luck, folks--looks like you're gonna need it. Divv is evidently shocked by something at this tea house. I have no idea what it could be. No thanks--maybe some other time. And now, the Chinese version of Nights in White Satin: The Ride. This conveyance goes through a tunnel at the bottom of the river. Marijuana smoke and vaporized LSD are pumped into this capsule while you ride. "Nights in white satin/Never reaching the end." "Letters I've written . . . never meaning to send . . ." "Beauty I've always missed . . ." Oh, wow . . . Aghh! Bad trip! Must have dumplings! That's all for now.

Chapter 12: Still More Shanghai Credit Whoring--or How to Fix a Golden Horse Spinning Coaster with a Big Stick This was another marathon day for hitting coasters in Shanghai's city parks. As you've probably gathered by now, nearly every city park in China seems to have some sort of amusement park with either a Spinning Coaster, a Jungle Mouse, or a Sliding Dragon, or perhaps all three. This day really is a bit of a blur for me--we just hit so many parks! But it does stand out for one amusing moment: "The Curious Incident of the Coaster with a Wedgie." Yes, our last park of the day, Century Park, was home to a Golden Horse spinner dubbed "Rotating Pulley." One of the cars on this ride didn't always reset itself properly after completing a circuit, which caused it to get wedged in place just before making the turn into the station. In a amazing show of Chinese technical prowess, two park workers freed the car by 1) poking at it with a very large stick from below and 2) pulling on it from above. It was easy to tell that this was a common occurrence on the Rotating Pulley--the stick was already in position when the car became stuck. I imagine the two guys running the coaster took turns in this procedure, too: "OK, I'm the stick man today. You get up on the track!" Never in America (or most other countries). Well, there were two other memorable high spots to this day: a hallucinogenic trip under the river via the Bund Sightseeing Tunnel and dinner at Elissa's favorite dumpling place. (And damn good dumplings they were, too--thanks, Elissa!) Off we go. You know, I'd really like to buy a kite. Anyone around here sell kites? Welcome to Gongqing Forest Park--looked like a nice place. Well, I don't know if I'd go as far as "luxurious," but it was a pleasant park. This ride, the Inertia Roller Coaster, had strange effects on people. Some were simply overwhelmed by the experience. Bill was transformed into a many-armed god! As for Brian and Robb, well, . . . . . . they're just having way too much fun. I think you can guess the effects that the Loop and Spiral Coaster had on people. We've all experienced that moment where one realizes, all too late, that a fatal mistake has been made: Robert E. Lee when he ordered Pickett's Charge at Gettysburg, us when this train left the station. I hate it when a lawn pretends to be something it's not! Stupid, specious lawn! Oh, China, you're just asking for it now! Remember what happened to Golden Horse at IAAPA! Now you may think this is a powered Sliding Dragon. But the Golden Dragon Roller Coaster is, in fact, Big Worm Inertia Train in disguise! One might say that it is a "Specious Sliding Dragon." This is Peace Park at Heping Park. Or was that Heping Park at Peace Park? Or maybe it was neither. Hmm . . . Whatever its name, the park did have the Outer Space Flying Car! Eat your heart out, Space Mountain! Yes! A dark ride! Larry can scarcely contain his excitement! My god! It's a Chinese lamp! And it's red--like blood! The whole ride was worth it just for this. More to come.

This is something Tusenfryd really needs--looks like a good mix of 3D projections and physical sets and effects (at least from what I can see on the concept art). The old attraction in that building was fun, and I was sorry to see it go, but this is shaping up to be a great replacement.

Great photo, Hanno. I still have yet to check out the Christmas stuff in Orlando.

^The Chinese also seem to be fond of the words "inertia" and "sliding" when it comes to ride names.

Carousels and donkey rides.

^The special effects in the original Terminator are pretty damn good, considering that it was fairly low budget movie made in 1984 before CGI started taking over special effects. Then again, I'm a fan of the old-school techniques, such as miniatures and stop motion.

Hard to say. I'm leaning toward Premier, mainly because of the Mummy rides (but that's hardly a sure thing).

^I don't find this "curious" at all. There are many factors that go into a park's success (or lack of it)--for example, service, appearance, perceived value to the public--rather than just the presence of a 200-foot coaster. Each park finds its own way to succeed or fail.

I doubt that any particular type of ride is a "guarantee" of success. It all depends on the park's audience. For example, Holiday World is very successful with three woodies and one steel coaster (and a kiddie ride, at that). Holiday Park in Germany, however, needed something like Expedition Geforce to put it on the map.

I was rather intrigued that there's a possibility for an extended layout for Intamin's Zac Spin coaster. Now that would be one insane ride.

I tried to see Lincoln tonight, but it was sold out. Nice to see that our 16th president can hold his own against a bunch of sparkly vampires. Then again, he is ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER!

^Vekoma has been coming on strong lately. I look forward to the IAAPA coverage every year and appreciate that it's not all just fun and games. There's a hell of a lot of work that goes beyond just visiting the show floor, taking video and photos, and checking out new park-food offerings. It also gives us a good look of all the hard work that goes into making sure people have a good time. Again, great job all around.

This was my favorite of all the IAAPA videos. I always look forward to seeing what Sally Corp has been up to, and the Vekoma segment was particularly interesting (I agree that it's been a great year for them).

I think you've answered your own question. The Six Flags parks aren't building rides for the enthusiast community, per se. Their outlook is more "regional"; that is, your average Six Flags over Texas customer is unlikely to to "drive over 600 miles" just to experience another Six Flags park. That being said, I think that SFOT and SFSL have different "feels" to them and are both enjoyable parks. I do agree with you about Boomerangs overall--they're just not very good (but the newer trains have helped).

As long as there aren't any dragon "poetry slams."

The villain in The Amazing Spider-man was the Lizard, not the Green Goblin.

"Where liquor in a mug/Can warm you like a hug . . ."

I'd love to see Liseberg over the Christmas season--I bet they do it up right.

Yeah, I'm not seeing how a stage show with acrobats is going to pull in more guests. It reminds me of when Disney brought the Electrical Parade to California Adventure to try and beef up crowds.

I guess "bad" is in the eye of the beholder. I would rate a front-seat ride on Ghost Rider as "tolerable," at best.

That surprised me, too.

Hmm--I think the first "Boomerang" type coaster I'd ever ridden was Two-Face at Six Flags America. The first "normal" Boomerang was probably the one at Hersheypark. Two-Face was the better of the two.

I'm glad that you found and rode the uber amazing Hollywood Tour!

I fianlly quit watching the Simpsons two years ago, but I like the idea that Srpingfield is, finally, coming to Universal (beyond the simulator ride and Kwick-E-Mart). I wonder if they'll do any special Halloween stuff there, being as "Treehouse of Horror" was usually the most anticipated Simpsons episode each season.