robbalvey

^^ Dbru, yes of course. No where does it say we are retiring the RAW series. ^ DenDen, we actually haven't been using the sticker labels now for about 2 years. We are thermal printing all of our DVDs now and haven't had a single bad one returned since! --Robb

^ No. It has to do with the additional amount of work it takes to create each DVD we do. The Coaster Footage series DVDs have been impacting the rate at which we can release more Coaster Expedition DVDs, Roller Coasters in the RAW DVDs, etc. I want to start up Roller Coasters in the RAW Blu-Ray and Dark Rides in the RAW which will require a significant amount of work so somethings gotta give! As for if we will still have the Coaster Footage DVDs available as downloads after Feb 1st, 2010, it's not been decided yet. --Robb

Hello readers of Theme Park Review! We have some good news and some bad news... As of February 1st, 2010 Theme Park Review will be "retiring" our "Coaster Footage" DVDs that we started producing in 2001. To celebrate the Coaster Footage DVD series going into retirement we will be offering for the first time ever a 12-pack DVD featuring ALL TWELVE DVDs from the Coaster Footage DVD series *AND* a 12-pack DVD featuring ALL TWELVE DVDs from the Coaster Expedition DVD series for one low price of $99.99! That's 24 Theme Park Review DVDs with the ENTIRE Coaster Footage and Coaster Expedition series packaged in two 12-disc DVD sets! This INSANE collection features over 400 rides & roller coasters and more than 160 different parks! This will ONLY be offered until February 1st, 2010 so order this special DVD set NOW! Click here: http://www.themeparkreview.com/store/index.php?productID=81 Thank you to everyone for your support! --Robb Alvey www.themeparkreview.com ps. Coaster Expedition DVDs will still be available, but after February 1st, 2010 the Coaster Footage discs will no longer be included. Here are a few examples of what to expect from our Coaster Footage DVD Series: SheiKra Coaster Footage Segment: Hades Coaster Footage Segment: The Voyage Coaster Footage Segment:

^ Meh...Does it really matter? --Robb "If it looks like a duck...it's a duck..." Alvey

Please keep in mind that the whole Club TPR thing is still being figured out. We included the joined date as a "worst case" for what we may need on the card to get an idea of layout styles. It probably will not actually make the final cut. --Robb

I think some people keep forgetting that, while roller coasters are a very important part of theme parks and this website, TPR is *NOT* a "Roller Coaster Site" and Club TPR is not a "Coaster Club." I really do not feel we will have a card that features a roller coaster as a main focal element of it. Yes, it may be included, but if you're drawn to that image over anything else, it's not going to win. Gumball, jcrouse and n7, looking more and more at printers, we may need a version where we print in black. Just FYI. --Robb

Salad, Dance Rape, and Shots! Today's cruise update is all about the "salad that's better than normal sex!" "We are big fans of normal sex so we are looking forward to this salad!" Russell - "This is also better than midget sex!" "Yes it's true...this is better than sex with Robb." "Ok let's put this salad to the test!" "Om nom...oh ice bat...oh baby baby... Om nom nom...." "I've never had normal sex, but this salad is pretty good..." "It's better than normal sex but not better than sex with Big Mike!" This is the ingredients for better than normal sex. "I will still respect you in the morning." Robb demonstrates "Salad Oral". Since KidTums is too young for the salad she got balloons! KidTums is about to get an amazing balloon! She got an umbrella and a doggie! Russell gets the court jester hat! Ooh! A Jeff Johnson credit! The first drop was pretty amazing but the loop...OMG! Today is an "at sea" day so that means exploring the ship and just hanging out! Cafe Promenade...time to get "second lunch!" Mark had finally found a woman that will change his life! Random cow. Kid on a leash alert!!! Kid on a leash!!! Have we mentioned how awesome the ship is? We spent most of the day out on our balcony doing nothing. It was amazing! Some of us played volleyball. Chris and Elissa played in the Blackjack tournament. (Elissa actually won her round!) Yeah...relaxing on the ship was awesome! ICE CREAM!!! Nom nom nom!!! She's a whore!!! This is better than any Togo roller coaster! Mmmmm....tequila. Elephant with a snorkel or a bong? If you know the answer. Email Dan! mrt0ad13@aol.com Ryan made it to the top of the rock wall! It's formal night again! Once again TPR members scrub up quite well! Tonight was "Drink lots of alcohol out of a whole pineapple" night! "Pineapples for everyone!!!" Tonight a special event was invented... DANCE RAPE!!!! Ryan gets DANCE RAPE!!!! Once someone warms up to dance rape, it's time to move on to the next unsuspecting victim. PINEAPPLE RAPE!!! DANCE RAPE DAVE!!! This is quite normal. Everyone does this. Nothing out of the ordinary is happening here. Which is more interesting? Chris with two drinks or the random hand? To Answer EMAIL DAN! mrt0ad13@aol.com Somewhere down there is Stefanie getting DANCE RAPE!!! (An Allison looks quite disgusted!) DANCE RAPE DAN!!!! Story Time - Ryan was actually hitting on a chick (I know, I know!) and Dan was trying to help him out and encourage him. It was taking Ryan quite a long time to put his moves on the girl and we told Dan "Ryan has 5 minutes to get his groove on with the chick or we are either going to A. Send the dance rape team up to Ryan, B. Send the dance rape team up to the girl, or C. Robb goes and tounge kisses Ryan." Dan chose option C to happen and as you can see the girl on the left was very impressed by the whole event! Chocolate Cake shots anyone? Awww, now this is really sweet. More Brain Hemmorage shots! GULP!!!! --Robb

Today was the "Quest for the Mexican Wal*Mart..." Our current view - Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. TPR rocks out the tribond trivia! What does a dog, a pillow, and a fist have in common? Tribond trivia WINNERS!!! Welcome to Puerto Vallarta! We have a specific quest in mind... "We are on a quest to find the Mexican Wal*Mart'l Hmmm....this sketchy bus goes to Wal*Mart...Should we take it? Hurry! American tourists are worth 500 points! Mexican Sam's Club? Nah... YESSSS! Mexican Wal*Mart!!! Everyone ready for some Mexican roll back prices? LET'S GO!!! Oooh! A sale on tostada shells! There is a Zebra, some wrestler dudes, and milk. WTF! Oddly enough this Mexican Wal*Mart was nicer than most American stores. Check out the covered parking! The camping area is themed... Nice looking deli! I want a Mexican Wal*Mart in my hometown!!! We totally found a Mexican knock-off Sega Genesis! Here is what a Mexican knock off Sega Genesis looks like! What a shock! They have Samba de Amigo here! "I've got 40 DVDr's and a knock off Sega Genesis...now I can write this trip off as a work expense!" "I'm just going to get in line behind the woman with the tires..." Sausage anyone? Sausage? Mexican sushi anyone? What are these? If you know the answer ... EMAIL DAN! mrt0ad13@aol.com First 10 people with the correct answer wins a bag-o-crap! (remember to include your mailing address with your email to Dan!) Only $16 for TWO bottles of tequila! Mexican Taxi. Next stop...Mexican shopping mall. Ahh...we have found Elissa Friendly Food! Five days of luxury cruise ship food is no match for McDonalds! "You uncultured swines!" Suck down that Subway Big Mike!!! "When in Mexico, you spike your McDonalds with a little tequila." There is our ship off in the distance. Today's TPR Spanish lesson - Basura means trash! OMG! We have found a Mexican Peter Piper Pizza! Could there be a hidden credit here? Big Mike is bummed...we found a carousel but no roller coaster. But we did find Mexican Deal Or No Deal!!! Exquisite dead guy. The quest for cheap alcohol continues! OMG! We can go see the Predator set??? Take us there now!!! The local natives made us some "family friendly" arts and crafts. (family friendly as in how to make a family using some of your closest friends!) Apparently they double as some sort of whistle? Ryan demonstrates. Colin proves he is the group's biggest nerd as he won every game in the Nintendo Wii Challenge! TPR tip of the day... Never EVER fall asleep when other TPR members are around. If you would like to know what happened to Ryan's hat, text him and ask! (559) 940-3525 This photo is the aftermath of what happens when Ryan was giving Lou a piggy back ride and then when Ryan least expected it, Robb punches him square in the nuts! Ryan and Lou tumble to the ground due to Ryan's now crippled stature while Dan and Hanno fall on the floor laughing thier asses off!!! People walking by thought we were plastered off our gourd when in reality the five of us hadn't had a drop of alcohol all day so far! (apologies to Lou for any damages mentally and physically this may have caused you) "Hey random ferry!!! Check this out!" "There seems to be a full moon tonight!" More photos coming soon! I am wondering...are you guys enjoyin these updates? Would anyone be interested in a TPR Cruise at some point in the near future? --Robb

Sorry for the lack of feedback. We will post more comments on Sunday. Until then, keep posting your ideas! N7 - did you see the comment about a version with a slightly bigger logo?

Today we made a stop in Mazatlan, Mexico! And this starts our day in Mazatlan! We are traveling about 45 MPH in the back of a truck! There is a 37% chance we will not make it past today! We were all given a pretty blue string...Welcome to Mexico! "OMG! I just dropped a two pound burrito!" Our current view. "We're going on a boat trip..." Our ship and the Sapphire Princess are having some interesting boat sects. From one sketchy Mexican transport vehicle to another. Yes, that is correct...TPR is being pulled by a tractor! Our four star accomodations for tonight! (Hey...it has a trampoline...how bad could it be?) Time to ransack a Mexican village! There are some really horrible people in the world...and these are some of them. Now THIS is how to spend an afternoon in Mexico! (Although the ATV's need a cup holder for the beer!) ATV POV!! Correction...THIS is the way TPR spends a day in Mexico! Yo dudes, what's up? Beach ATV POV! Chris has to stand because his butt still hurts! Russell on the beach at 45MPH. What cute little turtles! Too bad they are aligator food! NICE COCK!!! Back on the ATV road again. We have found a beautiful resort town for Hot Fuzz Rich! The final stretch home! Amazing!!! And now.. The "massive drinks in huge glasses on the beach" part of the day! Awwww....how cute. However Mark would rather share with his sugar daddy! KidTums approves of the beach! When in Mexico...Quesadillas! Next group of ATV gringos READY! Our current view. We got the uber posh speed boat back from the island. It says "Titanik!" "Same!" This statue depicts Elissa's life - naked in the kitchen making me food! Sailing out of Mazatlan...another amazing day! To follow us LIVE check out our Facebook updates! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Lots more new photos just posted to FaceBook! Check out the new update! Click in the Facebook link below then click Photos -> 2010 Cruise!

Sorry to report you'll have to live this one through photos. I haven't taken any video as I'm trying to have fun on this trip!

Here is our current view! We are all getting deported to Mexico! Our first port - Cabo San Lucas! Screw the Kogi truck, it's all about real Mexican tacos served from a dilapidated shack! Walking up to our first excursion. What could it be? Does Lou look nice and sexy? Respond back and say "LIKE!!!" Preseting the 2010 Theme Park Review Special Olympics Zip Lining Team! Screw roller coasters... This kicks A$$! Who the f**k invited Ryan??? Dios Mios!!! 55 miles per hour about 500 feet in the air! Now THAT is how TPR does a cruise! Have you ever done the "Mexican Butterfly" at 55MPH? CACTUS!! SHARP!! Group sex on the zip line! "Don't get wet. Don't feed sugar." TPR Mexicans feeling right at home! Mmmm...burrito. Check out my hot meat! Awesome! Vekoma made zip line! Our current view! This is going to RUIN quite a few TPR members in about 45 minutes! The best tequila is the free tequila! Shot number 16....and yes, that is a penis balloon on you are seeing on the screen! You really can't do a Mexican port town without a quick stop to Senor Frogs. Would you believe that Joey can seriously hold his liquor??? "Do you got anything with a little more girth?" Colin on the other hand...cannot hold is liquor! Everyone gets a fruity drink in a phallic glass! Who here would like a nice pink penis balloon in their face? Chris? Anyone else? Just Chris??? Penis balloons for EVERYONE!!! Over the counter Viagra? SURE!!! And everyones favorite super hero... SUPER VIAGRA!!! Which wrestler mask would YOU wear? Mexican boob credit! Hay tamales! We have tamales! Joey is clearly jealous of Colin's big balloon! "Ball---oooooon!" Hey everyone. Check out my sexy wings! WTF!!!! It was time to head back to the ship. Holy crap that thing is huge!!! Yeah. The ship is amazing! Would you believe this is ALL for Elissa??? A cruise ship...the perfect place to go ice skating! The girls of TPR! Ice skating edition! "After we take the picture can we eat this dolphin?" Hey! It's balloon boy! "Robb is correct. This salad IS better than normal sex!" "What you mean this is ALL the food I get??? Bring us a second round!" This Mexican baby tiger will whore himself out to you for an easy twenty bucks! (the tiger is the kitten shaped object NOT the woman with the giant mouth!) Whale watcing is a popular activity in Cabo San Lucas! Mexican puppets - maracas, symbols, and guns!!! How many TPR members can you cram in an elevator? Lou just said "Why is there a penis with sunglasses on my bed?" Here is what Cabo is famous for...a bunch of rocks! I wonder why Colin isn't feeling so good? Maybe because he puked up half of his internal organs on the balcony below? Why so serious??? Sunset looks amazing from the back of our swanky stateroom. Today was a GREAT day!!! To follow us LIVE, check out our Facebook update! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Many many new photos have been posted to our Facebook page. Link in my signature!

PHOTOSHOP CONTEST!!! PHOTOSHOP CONTEST!!! We all know that Chris really wants to go down on something OTHER than the shot glass. What else could it be? Everyone that enters a photoshopped version of this picture to our Cruise thread on TPR gets a Bag-O-Crap! Be sure you post your photo and EMAIL DAN with your name and mailing address! mrt0ad13@aol.com Irish Car Bomb for the jew...not a big deal! These two shots will make EIGHT! NO CAPTION NEEDED! Chris is faking it! You want me...just admit it! I said it on our Transatlantic cruise and I'll say it again now... This salad is better than "normal" sex. Elissa and Colin have entered the slut tournament. If you get a high score you win a slut. OMG! They won!!! "Tap that button as fast as you can. Just like you do in the shower!" --Royal Caribbean Slut Tournament Host Ooooh! If only it was real! Joey and Big Mike and going to win some sluts! Joey made it to the final round of the Slut Tournament!!! It's easy to spot our groups cabins! We have the "Royal Family Suite!" Our balcony...amazing view! And yes Quaker is totally crashed! It's formal night! Elissa shows off her dress. How will she ever fit into that? We are just hanging out in our stateroom! Royal Family Suite Stateroom room #1. Royal Family Suite Stateroom room #1. Watching the sunset from our stateroom balcony. I'm cute dammit! Send me presents! (gift cards will do!) Wow! TPR members all cleaned up! Very...very sexy! Moinab and her family look amazing! We pressure washed the California Table and look what happened! "Hey baby, can I fork you?" This is the happiest moment in Hanno's life! More to update tomorrow! SUBMIT YOUR PHOTOSHOP ENTRIES NOW!!!

Yeah, I've lost about 30 pounds since the beginning of November...only about 30 pounds left to go! BTW, I just posted a few more "Chris drunk" and "Quaker Dancing" photos in the update above!

WARNING! This update contains content that some people may find offensive or crude. If you are easily offended, turn back now! If you're not, be prepared to read an AWESOME update! Robb's Fantastic 40th Birthday Cruise! Part 1 - Arrival and checking out the ship Part 2 - Photoshop contest, Chris gets drunk, & all dressed up! Part 3 - Ziplining and getting smashed in Cabo San Lucas! Part 4 - ATV's and other randomness in Mazatlan! Part 5 - "The Quest For The Mexican Wal*Mart!" Part 6 - "The Salad that is better than NORMAL Sex!" & Ryan gets kissed! Part 7 - The Farewell TPR Party & Group Photos Hey everyone! Short version of the story! (Short version because I'm on a 55 cents per minute internet connection!) Elissa planned a week long "Surprise Birthday Party" cruise for my 40th birthday and invited some well known TPR regulars! And the rest is what is happening on the cruise right now! If you want to keep updated, Follow us LIVE on Facebook! Welcome to Robb's Fantastic 40th Birthday Surprise Cruise!!! That's right bitches! Time for a TPR cruise 2010! Follow this for regular updates! Our very first TPR Group Cruise! What familiar faces do you see? As always...a TPR trip comes complete with lots of sausage. And wherever there is sausage there is always Guy's A$$! (That's a great place to hide a sausage!) TPR loves these Royal Caribbean Voyager class ships. Perfect for our group! And this photo validates this entire update as a "theme park" trip! Hanno gets the BOOB CREDIT! Did Dave decorate this ship??? Sail away...goodbye Los Angeles....good riddance! Time for some mini golf. KidTums has this down! "Meh...screw using the damn club!!!" Hanno! Jump on that boat! It will take you home! And thus starts a full week of the "drink of the day!" Thumbs up for the drink of the day! It's the "California Table!!!" Mmmmmm...plain pasta! The WINNERS of the first trivia contest of the cruise...this table full of TPR lunatics! S'Mores = The best themed slot machine EVAR!!! (well next to Chainsaws & Toasters) Stilt walkers on the ship??? William would be so jealous! And now...it's time to party!!! "Hey, what's with the starfish? Remove those suckers!!!" "This is only my 8th long island iced tea if the night!" "Wait...IS that William???" There's a party on my cruise ship... One of these dudes likes women...can you guess which one? "Hey look! It's Fire and Ice shots!" GULP! "That was not a good idea!" For those of you who have been wondering what happend to "Quaker" he's now a topless go-go dancer on Royal Caribbean cruise ships! Go Quaker! Go Quaker! Go Quaker! WE LIKE TO *DANCE!!!* This is the "heart of the ship". I think I'm creeped out by it? Time to work off all those shots! More updates soon! If you want to keep updated, Follow us LIVE on Facebook! --Robb

^ No, sorry. We cannot offer a discount because you have specific dietary needs. The park offers options for vegetarians, diabetics, kosher, and even vegan customers. Elissa is an extremely picky eater too and she even pays full price for every event we do! When she finds something she likes on the menu, she gets DOUBLE, after all, it's included! You are not paying extra money, you are paying the same as everyone else, and not everyone may like all the options provided. But I'm sure everyone will find something they can either eat or like, even if it's not the full meal. I still think you will be getting an extremely good value for your money even if you only ate the side dishes at the event. --Robb

Right. She knows that. We've done this exact same thing before with the exact same company at other towers. And it's not "2 people per hour" are you kidding me? They take a group in at one time, you all get suited up, you all watch the video, you all go through your little 'training' thing, then you do the drop. It's probably about the same capacity as a Skycoaster or a SCAD tower. The actual drop takes about 3 to 5 minutes with getting each person into place, checking all the cables and restraints, and then the drop, then unhooking you from the cables. The actual experience is very much like the old Knott's Parachute Sky Jump, but instead of the cables being attached to the parachute, they are attached to your harness. But it's about the same speed of descent. --Robb

It would increase the complexity. We would need to have two versions of the card, one with and without the picture. I'm sure some people would have problems with the image and quality is very subjective and it's very possible we'd end up getting in a lot of images that just wouldn't work or we would have to re-print with a better image. This isn't something we would want to do. --Robb

I thought RRR was FANTASTIC! I ranked it #24 out of the 341 steel coasters I ranked on the poll. It was slightly above Manta on my list which I ranked at #26. --Robb "I'm surprised it was so low!" Alvey

I think I really like the larger Club TPR logo. n7, would you want to take another stab at yours with a slightly larger logo as well? I think I'd like to see what that would look like. --Robb

^ Wow! That one really is a contender! I like it a lot. --Robb

It got a lot rougher this year.

Steel results are up! The Top 20 steel coasters are: 1 - Bizarro - SF New England 2 - Eagle's Fortress - Everland 3 - Expedition GeForce - Holiday Park 4 - Diamondback - Kings Island 5 - Goliath - Walibi World 6 - Piraten - Djurs Sommerland 7 - Nemesis - Alton Towers 8 - Katun - Mirabilandia 9 - Kawasemi - Tobu Zoo 10 - Millennium Force - Cedar Point 11 - Pyrenees - Parque EspaNa 12 - Blue Fire Megacoaster - Europa Park 13 - Behemoth - Canadas Wonderland 14 - Goliath - La Ronde Parc Amus 15 - Goliath - Six Flags Over Geo 16 - Apollo's Chariot - Busch Gardens Euro 17 - Maverick - Cedar Point 18 - Montu - Busch Gardens Afri 19 - Nitro - Six Flags Great Ad 20 - Tele2 Insane - Grona Lund Some Notes About The Results From Mitch Six Flags New England's Bizarro is #1 again. Eagle's Fortress again finished #2 (based on rides delivered a year or more ago as it did not operate in 2009) and Expedition GeForce again placed third in the poll. Kings Island's Diamondback leads the Class of 2009 with an impressive fourth place debut. Perennial Top 10 Steel Coaster Goliath of Holland's Walibi World improved three spots to #5 this year. Piraten of Djurs Sommerland in Denmark fell one spot from its 2008 debut to #6 this year. Perennial favorite Nemesis is #7 this year, just ahead of #8 Katun. Kawasemi dropped five spots from its 2008 debut to #9 this year. Millennium Force climbed two spots from 2008 and closes out this year's top ten. Falling out of the top 10 this year were Behemoth, which dropped five spots from its 2008 debut to #12, and Dragon Khan at #22. Other new coasters that debuted well this year include Blue Fire Megacoaster at #12, Tele2 Insane at #20, Manta at #23, iSpeed at #37, and Fluch von Novgorod at #41. "Favorite Wood Coaster" outclassed the top steel rides again this year. It would have finished 4th, losing only comparisons to some European and Australian Steel Coasters in countries where most of the local wood coasters are not as highly regarded. However, the most interesting result is that "Favorite Wood Coaster" beat each of the top three steel coasters by large margins among mutual-riders. The opposite is true in the wood poll as "Favorite Steel" lost by healthy margins to each of the top three wooden coasters.