Unanswered/Dumb Question-Dumb Answer game

[wumwip]

You wanted to make you post both interesting and hard to read.

 

Where did I put my keys?

[MayTheGForceBeWithYou]

Check your crack...in the sofa. Crap falls in there a lot.

 

Do we REALLY need these big ass harnesses to go through one loop?

[ebl]

The people with big asses do!

 

Why did L-1011s and DC-10s have an engine stuck in their tail?

[4rturo]

because they are gay.

 

should I do all of my homework??

[wumwip]

Only if it matters.

 

What time does the next rocket go to the moon?

[MayTheGForceBeWithYou]

They stopped doing it in 2005. They go to the edge of the galaxy now.

 

Why is my cat so annoying?

[cal1br3tto]

Because you hate really affectionate cats.

 

Where did babies come from in the old days before they invented storks?

[wumwip]

They came from sea gulls.

 

Where can I find the men's clothes section?

[ebl]

^ If they were male, they came from buoys...

 

You'll find the men's clothing section tucked away in a little corner of the store, while the women's clothing takes up the rest of the space---just like how it is when you share a closet!

 

Why did they call it a "Mars" bar instead of "Saturn?"

[kcsteve]

Because they knew Saturn would go out of business.

 

Why do Peter Paul Almond Joys have nuts, but Mounds don't?

[ebl]

Because it would be complete and total McStupidation for a candy bar called "Almond Joy" to not have any nuts in it. "Mounds," on the other hand, is rather vague because "mounds" could be mounds of anything, even pork rinds.

 

Why do most Wendy's restaurants have their soda fountain behind the counter where only the employees can reach it to fill drinks, while almost every other chain has their fountains out so diners can fill their own?

[mightbeawannabe]

Because they like doin' things backa$$ward. Square burgers and mayo on 'em too. I can't think of anything more different than that about Wendy's.

 

Why is my drum major such an A$$?

[wumwip]

Because he took lessons.

 

When are they going to build an amusement park in my town?

[ebl]

Your town is bankrupt, so...never.

 

What kind of liquid do they use in liquid crystal displays?

[wumwip]

They call it "Liquistal"... it's a strange mixture of the two.

 

Do fast food places use real meat in their products?

[mightbeawannabe]

Only in extremely small amounts.

 

What's the rest?

[wumwip]

The stuff that doesn't matter.

 

Where did I park my car?

[ebl]

In that space that's now empty because you left the car in gear and didn't set the brake.

 

What exactly is in sludge?

[mightbeawannabe]

Sludge: it's - it' + lunch - nch + fudge - fu = sludge

 

Is it sinful to eat like 10 pounds of meat at a brazilian steakhouse?

[ebl]

Ten pounds, no. But don't go to town and eat a "brazillion" pounds!

 

Why does the city's library close at 5pm on a Sunday?

[MayTheGForceBeWithYou]

Because the 9 to 5 is long enough for them.

 

Why are my crookneck squash growing all crooked?

[ebl]

If your squash weren't growing crooked, they couldn't be called "crookneck" squash. So if you called them that, they'd be insulted and wreck your house in the middle of the night.

 

Why can't you see through sand, but you can see through glass, which is made from sand?

[mightbeawannabe]

I don't know, but I think the answer's clear.

 

Why is the grass browner on the other side of the fence? I thought it was supposed to be green!

[gisco]

Because they forgot to water.

 

Why are they called cookies? You don't cook them, you bake them. Shouldn't they be called bakies?

[kcsteve]

Baking is a form of cooking, so cookies is acceptable. Should we call buildings builts instead?

 

If Helen Keller fell in the woods, and no one was around, would she make a sound?