Philrad's 2010 (mostly) small park adventures

[Philrad71]

^You're right...in all fairness, I guess he is sorta sexy in a Yul Brynner sort of way.

[Philrad71]

Knoebels - Part Two...

Chuck says Michael's potato cakes are sensational!

Boobs in a family park? Why no beer then??

Kozmo?? Kozmo! Yep...go ahead and laugh...it's Kozmo Kramer!

Hey, I live about an hour from North Ton-a-wanda. I know TPR loves them a whole ton-a-wanda!

Michael LOVED this old Wurlitzer organ...but not enough to run away and elope with it.

And I loved the old shooting gallery!

I especially loved hitting the old hag on the crapper! I can't remember what she did when I hit her though...I was expecting a fart or a plop or something, but it wasn't that.

Now...onto 'The Little Ride That Couldn't'.

I think that they should just let people ride it on one of those creepers the mechanics use...wouldn't that be awesome?

I think I can, I think I can! This ride is still better than Son Of Beast without a doubt.

I so want to do this next year!

Black Diamond with a test car thingie on the track! See, now why can't they use those on Flying Turns?

New or used...a dark ride always rocks!

Speaking of the awesomeness of dark rides...

The Haunted House is almost as good as Devil's Den!

Eff the super heroes...Knoebels has the best characters of any amusement park - hands down.

Quick trivia question...who sang that ultra-crappy song 'Toy Soldiers' in the 80's?

 

A). Quarterflash

B). Debbie Gibson

C). Martika

D). Who cares, cause they all fail.

If sliding down on a giant silver vibrator is your idea of a good time....get to Knoebels!

Or if you're a Michael Vick wannabe and like balls in your mouth....get to Knoebels!

Oooooh...I've heard good things about this place!

We decided on the pepperoni, pepperoni and mushroom and the BLT. I would recommend against the BLT pizza and stick with the basic pizza. Lettuce on pizza=fail.

Although if you like shrooms, they certainly don't short-change you on the toppings! If they could put Delgrosso's sauce on this pizza, I would definitely think of asking for it's hand in marriage.

 

Thanks for reading...more Knoebels coming soon, including blurry night pictures you won't want to miss!

[eddie200330]

The answer would be C - Martika. fail yes, but Debbie Gibson was and still is pretty hawt. Trying to talk the family into a couple of days here this summer. The Cabins look pretty enticing. Is there much else to do in the general vicinity of the park that would warrant 2 - 3 days?

[imawesome1124]

Nice pictures so far.

 

^ I also am trying to convince my family to go to Knoebel's. And right now there is a good chance we are going. As long as I keep my grades up and don't pi$$ of my parents too much.

[Philrad71]

The Cabins look pretty enticing. Is there much else to do in the general vicinity of the park that would warrant 2 - 3 days?

 

As far as families, Knoebels is in a pretty remote area so not too sure of other activities. We ended up going to a local golf course (Knoebels advertises one that they own as well) for a round in between the Knoebels visits, which was a lot of fun. But unless your whole family is into golfing, that might not work for you.

 

The Susquehanna River is nearby and would probably offer some water-based activities. We drove down to Shamokin Dam one day expecting, well...a big dam. Even though it was a little unremarkable, there was a nice area of the Susquehanna that looked like it would be a nice area for boating.

 

Perhaps some of the other readers might have some suggestions? I know there are some people on here that live fairly close to Elysburg.

 

If you are only going for a couple days though...Knoebels probably has enough to offer to keep the family going with the pools, waterslides and (of course) the great rides!

Edited January 16, 2011 by Philrad71

[Philrad71]

The answer would be C - Martika.

 

 

Ooops - I forgot to add...you are correct with Martika!

[Josh Linn]

The Cabins look pretty enticing. Is there much else to do in the general vicinity of the park that would warrant 2 - 3 days?

 

As far as families, Knoebels is in a pretty remote area so not too sure of other activities. We ended up going to a local golf course (Knoebels advertises one that they own as well) for a round in between the Knoebels visits, which was a lot of fun. But unless your whole family is into golfing, that might not work for you.

 

The Susquehanna River is nearby and would probably offer some water-based activities. We drove down to Shamokin Dam one day expecting, well...a big dam. Even though it was a little unremarkable, there was a nice area of the Susquehanna that looked like it would be a nice area for boating.

 

Perhaps some of the other readers might have some suggestions? I know there are some people on here that live fairly close to Elysburg.

 

If you are only going for a couple days though...Knoebels probably has enough to offer to keep the family going with the pools, waterslides and (of course) the great rides!

 

I live in Bloomsburg, which is about 15 miles from Elysburg. There's really nothing to do around here, it sucks. If you come during the last week of September, the Bloomsburg Fair is worth a visit, but other than that, visiting Centralia is the only thing I can think of.

[beatle11]

That pizza looks so good!

[Ccron10]

For the last several years my family and me would usually go up and stay around the park for several days. One of the days would usually consist of going to the park, another would be a trip to Lycoming County above Williamsport where the Pine Creek is. This area is very picturesque with many mountains and valleys (including the Grand Canyon of Pennsylvania). It usually takes 1 to 2 hours to get up to this area (3 hours and a long, boring, drive on Rt. 287 to get to the Canyon), but it's worth it if you love nature.

Other attractions are Reptileland and a Coal Mining Tour in Ashland.

[CardCraze]

So should we give up on any hopes of "Flying Turns" opening?

[Philrad71]

Other attractions are Reptileland and a Coal Mining Tour in Ashland.

 

I forgot about Reptileland! We passed it driving down to see my sister on New Years and thought, "that looks like a cool place to visit." It wasn't very big looking from the outside, but interesting that they would just have a reptile zoo out in the middle of nowhere!

 

As far as Flying Turns opening...no clue. The picture of the sign I posted in the trip report had a bunch of history on the old turns below it and how they wanted to resurrect a classic ride. It did mention all the problems they have encountered and assured guests that they were doing everything in their power to get the ride up and running as soon as possible.

 

To be honest, while I think it would be great for the park to get the ride open, I personally don't see it as being a fixture ride that I would personally set as a specific goal for visiting Knoebels. Go for the food, atmosphere, Skooters and Phoenix...and if they happen to get FT open in 2011, even better!

[Josh Linn]

For the last several years my family and me would usually go up and stay around the park for several days. One of the days would usually consist of going to the park, another would be a trip to Lycoming County above Williamsport where the Pine Creek is. This area is very picturesque with many mountains and valleys (including the Grand Canyon of Pennsylvania). It usually takes 1 to 2 hours to get up to this area (3 hours and a long, boring, drive on Rt. 287 to get to the Canyon), but it's worth it if you love nature.

Other attractions are Reptileland and a Coal Mining Tour in Ashland.

 

Ashland's a bit off the beaten path and could be hard to get to if you're not from this area. Still a cool place to visit if you're into that stuff.

 

We went to Reptiland for a field trip in like 2nd grade. It was cool, but like was said above, it's really small and there's not a ton to see.

[palmerleeberry]

Hey ya, it's me once more to comment on you recent photographs you have posted online for our viewing enjoyment.

 

-Upon seeing that side of the building that will soon be the Black Diamond ride, I went like this -

 

- About that metal pole inside the campground, I think that two sets of see-saws used to be placed on the pole before they all rotted and had to taken away. Now its "Pole of Death -the ride"!

 

- The opening tunnel of the Phoniex can be intimidating (because it's so dark you cannot see the hand in front of your face).

 

- Knoebels has a pool??? I wonder why I didn't notice that the last time I was there?

 

- And finally, people who posts skulls and demons in their campground sites do it for a reason and it's not to attract visitors either.

 

"Yes, Knoebels has a pool just as you also have a very lonely pillow on a bed you hardly use. If you use me more often than you do, then you wouldn't keep forgetting me!

[Philrad71]

"Yes, Knoebels has a pool just as you also have a very lonely pillow on a bed you hardly use. If you use me more often than you do, then you wouldn't keep forgetting me!

 

^THIS is awesome...more cool comments like this, please.

 

Okay, back to more Knoebels...

Knoebels is so purdy! Trivia question: How many amusement parks have a covered bridge over water?

 

A) One - Knoebels

B). Two - Knoebels + one other park in Finland.

C). Donkey

Any park that has a dirty looking building called 'The Loaf' is easily the best park in the world.

Has anyone posted a pic of this ride before?

How about a trip on the Skyway before dark?

Skyway takes you over the road & up the mountain...doesn't look that high, does it?

Random UFO? Anyone know what this is and why it's stacked on pallets?

While I didn't mind this ski-lift too much...the one at Lake Compounce scared the living CRAP outta me!

Yay...we hit the summit!

Yowza...we are frickin' high! A lot higher than it looks from the ground!

The awesomeness that is Phoenix.

Almost back down to earth!

This ride looked crazy fun, but we didn't ride it on this visit.

Hey, babe...ya wanna get a room with me and Phoenix later? Might be your last chance for some fun before you tie the knot.

Awwww....who am I kidding? The pool is way sexier than 1001 Nacht! And I will NOT toss it to the side like some unused pillow, damn it!

Okay, minds out of the gutter...I spy me another coaster over there.

I was gonna have Michael take a pic of me making out with the Golden Bolt, but I was afraid of getting in trouble.

Is this not one of the coolest coaster signs ever?

We really liked this coaster at night. A unique layout and very fast! No where near the airtime of Phoenix, but just a really fun coaster that isn't overly rough.

Mmmmm....sexy Flyers. God dang it...I'm gonna outdo that darn lesbian-looking woman and just marry this entire park!

Goodnight, Knoebels...I love you now and forever....always and always.

[imawesome1124]

Wow, Knoebels looks awesome at night. Thanks for posting the pics.

[Philrad71]

Had enough Knoebels yet?

 

 

If not....here's some more!

We're baaaack...and so is everyone else!

The tricky part of this update is trying to remember what pictures I have posted already. Well, I'm pretty sure I haven't already posted this random bug on a tree.

ZAMPERLA!!!

This ride looked crazy, but seemed to have the shortest looking cycle of all the rides at Knoebels.

Seemed to have a decent line for it and it was in a very centralized location.

Being that we wanted to see Kozmo's Kazoo, we decided to wait and watch the parade.

Hey, there he is - KOZMO! Now show us your kazoo!

Okay, here's the golf cart carrying the sound system. The floats and characters must be behind them, right?

Huh? Wait...characters....gone...floats...nothing but people...and woman with balloons. This is the parade? WTF? Oh, I see....you are supposed to BE the parade and follow Cozmo around the park dancing with your ballon. Nowwwwww, I get it........I think.

The Flyers went up high enough where you could almost spit on the track of Flying Turns. Don't worry, I didn't though and you shouldn't either, because that would be be very rude and disrespectful....listen to your elders now, ya hear!

Lot's of cool classic flat rides here...

...including one of my all-time favorites!

The log flume looked on par with the one at Waldameer...but more woodsy.

Hmmm...you don't say?

I guess if Kozmo says their good...just as long as it it's not as lame as his parade!

This almost beat out Phoenix as the funnest ride at Knoebels. I don't think I have laughed this hard in years. You can just sense the aggressiveness in everyone on this ride! Michael got his hat knocked off on the first hit and then some little girl ran it over and smiled with glee as she did so. Some granny in her 70's laughed and laughed when she caught me on a head-on. It was no-holes-barred craziness! I could easily see someone getting whiplash on this ride if they weren't careful. This is just a classic ride that hasn't been tamed down by sue-hungry idiots...you must get to Knoebels and ride these bumper cars!!!!

Woo-hoo...look at me rockin' the Loop-O-Plane, Roll-O-Plane...whatever the eff O-plane it was, it was awesome!

And this is what everything looked like when I got off for the next fifteen minutes.

I think Michael bowled over several kids and their grandparents to get this horse on the Merry-Go-Round. He wasn't leaving till he got an outside horse so he could go for the brass ring!

Success?

YES! I asked him to hold the rings up to his ears and act like a gay pirate. Somalian pirates take note...don't mess with crazy American gay pirates at an amusement park!

Best wishes to you too, Knoebels! We love you, miss you and we'll be back soon...with or without Flying Turns!

[beatle11]

Great stuff. Best bumper cars in America may be an understatement. Will get there this year!

[DJeXeL]

These Zamperla Powersurges are intense. Rode one at a fair and gave me the worst headache.

[cal1br3tto]

The more I see of Knoebels, the more amazing it looks! Can't wait to go there!

[larrygator]

The more I see of Knoebels, the more amazing it looks! Can't wait to go there!

 

It's a shame your Lusse Bumper Cars at Oaks run only half as fast as the ones at Knoebels. Seeing your taste in parks and rides you would love Knoebels. Phoenix rivals the Coaster at Playland for airtime.

[cal1br3tto]

^I'm definitely expecting the phamous Phoenix to be my type! But there is one thing that really sells me on this park, and that would be the ring carousel.

[Philrad71]

I thought the ring carousel was cool too even though I stayed behind to eat my kettle corn and snap pictures of Michael trying to grab the rings. I think he got about four or five of them, so there will be plenty of free rides for next time!

 

As far as the Skooters, it really is too bad that almost all of the parks have tamed them down to the point of utter ridiculousness. I was hoping that the one's at Conneaut Lake this fall would have been as good, but they were pretty slow. I wonder if Knoebels is the only park left that has bumper cars that go "full bore"?

 

What about the one's in Europe? I have never been on any at the parks I have visited.

[Philrad71]

Today's report brought to you by Kings Dominion (Yep, this is one of the "not so small" parks)...

Lift hill of the bobsled while in line for Volcano. It was about 90 degrees and this little girl in front of us barfed into the garbage can. Whoever she was with phoned her parents and said "So and so just barfed into the garbage can...can you believe it?" Poor girl may have been suffering from heat exhaustion or dehydration and the adults were laughing at her...classy-n-sassy.

I think they should rename this ride the Invertalon...maybe even have a watermark on the ride sign?

Oh, there's that thing...

Lots of hot action down there, but the t-clouds are rolling in. Guess we better barge our way onto the ferris wheel.

I actually liked Shockwave this time and caught some major air on one of the hills!

Ackkk...I think I would rather lick the shellac off one of Ricochet's wheels than ride Hurler again.

I'm thinking that this could have been that airtime hill.

Only because everyone can appreciate a furry tunnel.

This one's called "find the swear word"

I think these should all be called: Troika, Troika, Troika

We got absolutely soaked on White Water Canyon. Note Michael's shameless plug t-shirt for WCB 2009...if you have not been, get to one now!!! We missed ECB here by one week....dammit!

Always have to stop for the obligatory Grizzly photo op and a quick ride on the front seat. Still would love to ride this at night sometime...not the most thrilling, but it ain't Hurler, so that means it rules.

That's it from KD. We got a ride on Dominator in between the coasters shutting down from thunder & lightning in the area. That's still one of my favorite floorless looping coasters.

 

Next stop - back to the small parks fun with the ghettoness that is...Rye Beach!

 

Tonks for readin...

[Generic Name]

Man; I haven't been to KD since 2003 and probably won't go back there any time soon since I moved north, but these are some great photos.

 

Avalanche is a great ride; sure, it isn't fast or intense, but it's fun, and if I hadn't ridden Trace du Hourra in France I'd say it'd be my favorite Bobsled coaster (well, Avalanche and TdH are my only Bobsled coasters ). Anyway, thanks for the pictures. I hope I can make it back down there one of these days and ride Dominator.

[eddie200330]

Great pics from the Ferris Wheel! I loved the comment about Hurler and Ricochet!!! Shockwave is definitely an under rated stand up, sure it may be rough if you don't know how to ride, but it has been there long enough for people to figure that much out. Grizzly at night is kinda like Beast at night, WAY more insane than daytime. Definitely love the horizon pics looking out towards the turn around on Rebel Yell now that the skyline has changed.

 

Keep up the great reports and I love following this thread.