cal1br3tto

I totally forgot Volcano was the Enterprise; guess that means I won't miss it. I often skip them, but do try to check them out every now and then. Now Auto Race...that's a must-ride.

^I approve...wait, no, I think I just like the car. To each their own, but I just can't help but be a little surprised that people are wanting to get last rides in. No, I didn't hate it, but it is decidedly...not good...at the very least. I do hope they'll either incorporate aspects of the ride's former glory, or design something that will make us forget all about both the early days and the current suckiness. Not sure when I'll return, but looking forward to this new reason!

On Sunday, May 20, I headed to Lakeside Amusement Park to complete my run of all (erm, both) "major" Denver parks. In case you didn't read what I JUST SAID. And hopefully PTSA doesn't stand for Post Traumatic Stress Amelioration, 'cause that won't happen here. Try "Aggravation." The park immediately started giving off a VERY strong Indiana Beach vibe (though, admittedly, I don't even remember if any part of Indiana Beach actually looks like this photo). Also, to help set the scene of this park, I must inform you there was a dead bird lying on the entryway. Besides its Midwest cousin Indiana Beach, the park shows similarities to several other traditional amusement parks. Knoebels, without the overwhelmingly lovable, tucked-in-the-woods atmosphere. Kennywood, with fewer major rides and no hint of a corporate feel. And it's closely comparable to Rye Playland, though that park might have the edge in ride selection. Anybody know how it compares to Conneaut Lake Park? "Daaamn gurl, you lookin' FIERCE!" Meet the infamous Tower of Jewels (what jewels?). This stunning, um, structure, is visible throughout much of the park. I was surprised to see a sign this iconic in such poor shape, and partly blocked. Give me an axe and a can of pink paint, stat. As you can see, the park has fostered a mutually beneficial relationship with the Disney Corporation, securing the rights to use likenesses of such beloved characters as Chip 'n' Dale. Lakeside has the admirable policy of opening a few sucky rides first and then gradually starting to open the good ones an hour later, or something like that. But today they were nice and opened Wild Chipmunk early. If you enjoy moderate physical discomfort, THIS IS THE RIDE FOR YOU. My fourth and final old-school Miler Mouse (thank goodness), this seemed heavier on the lats than those at Adventure City, Texas Wonderland, and Snooki-Land. Let's ride the Scrambler! Because it's there. It was good, but not amazing. Yes, there is absolutely a such thing as an amazing Scrambler. Fact: if you stare at this long enough, it begins to look misspelled. Wait, on second thought, that's probably just me. I got a slightly short cycle and an extra-long cycle on this, because somebody made a boo-boo. Sadly, my second ride was WORSE (people were trying to get the "good" cars, and I failed very badly at this, as I thought finding a seat not covered in dirt was a slightly higher priority). Lakeside even has a big pretend spider to go with all their real ones! Or at least, this strikes me as the kind of place that WOULD have a lot of creepy-crawlies. It sure gave me some! The Spider was closed for repairs. SULK!!! Here is a theater-style sign that reads "CYCLONE," in case you can't read...err...can't read photographs? And over there is a roller coaster train with fixed position lappy-things. <3 I about spit out my gravy when I read this (okay, it isn't funny...but I had to make a gravy joke somehow and that seemed to fit). As you may have noticed, the park has a massive white toothpick sculpture near the entrance. Not sure what that's all about, to be honest. There is an early Parker carousel (that doesn't look ANYTHING like your typical Parker machine, as you no doubt will notice) right by the main ride ticket booth. I took exactly FIFTY merry-go-round pictures, but narrowed that down to a much more appropriate number. Warning: this ride will deliver an a$$-kicking...TO YOUR SANITY. But it's the TPR-approved kind, so it's okay. Or is it? Am I really okay after all this? I don't know anymore. The most beautiful figure on the world's finest carousel. A genuine and moving masterpiece. I developed a crush on this hauntingly alluring young lady. I know you think I'm joking. I...I truly have no words. But I wouldn't be surprised if this chariot does. I'm pretty sure every night at the strike of midnight all of these...things...party it up for exactly one hour. Looking at these pictures makes me at least as uneasy as actually riding the thing. Which I did. Twice. I was simply unable to resist The Force...or would that be The Horce? I don't know what this is, but I'm pretty sure it's NOT a band organ. The music was recorded, but still infiltrated my addled mind and swirled around as part of The Horce. HA, HA, that says "wagon." Tee-hee! Cats and rats and elephants, but sure as you're born, you're never gonna see no...actually, at Lakeside, I don't doubt that you'd find ALL of those animals. And, excepting the unicorn, I don't mean on the carousel. I wasn't even drunk yet at this point and I already believed I was riding around in circles on the back of a giant purple rabbit. Thank goodness there is photographic proof that this REALLY happened. The park had each carousel figure write down a little about itself and its favorite activities, so we could get to know them better. Oh, and again with the TPR approval. I KNEW IT. The carousel is possessed by the spawn of Lucifer Himself. Yeah, I don't really get the whole "Satan is goats" thing, either, but I always assumed it's because they're pernicious little devils who eat EVERYTHING, including your soul. I am honestly surprised I have never read anything bad about this Terrousel. Please note: I am NOT paying for your therapy. QUICK, LET'S RUN TO THE OPPOSITE END OF THE PARK. Oh, and tragically, these are NOT, in any way, shape, or form, Lusse Auto Skooters. Ummm...(So many questions. What is that? Why the hell does he look like a Popeye character to me? And what on earth is he is wearing, a DRESS???) The BumperCarena Dance Floor. Which, I would hope, does NOT double as a Macarena Dance Floor. I adore the beautiful and artful sign on the Dragon at Lakeside Amusement Park. He looks pretty chipper for being unemployed long-term. Choo-choo tracks. And a "LAKES DIE" sign...wait, no, that just says "LAKESIDE." But somehow "LAKES DIE" seems equally fitting to me. This must be Lakeside's "Bad Tower." There was a Hurricane. Thankfully, everyone survived. These were sadly unsnappable, but I did manage to get some funky noises and angles during my ride. I still maintain that this ride has legs, though. Cute! That is a Ferris wheel. Now you know. It's a good old-fashioned Eli Wheel with a bonus bird's nest (that's a literal statement, not carnie slang). ZOOM (away from the park, as fast as you can). Not surprisingly, this was a really fun tower, with superb junkyard-esque views. Fact: every year they open up this ride (and no others) for Valentine's Day. It funds their entire operating budget for the rest of the year. Okay, I made that up. Just what many TPR members LOVE. Maybe this is what should be open on Valentine's Day? This was pretty wild (and pretty pretty, too). Worse than: Rye Playland. On a level with: Dorney and Kennywood. Better than: Knoebels and stupid Hershey. Here is a picture of the Sensational Round-Up. Just kidding, but here's the real thing. Explain to me how Round-Ups defy gravity? I seriously mistook this for a Roll-O-Plane and was terrified to ride. Thankfully, it's just a harmless ol' Loop-O-Plane. BIG difference in ride experience. Another example of the thriving Disney partnership. Matterhorns are typically charming as all get-out, and this was only a partial exception. The cycle was decent, but not excellent (common Lakeside theme). It was, however, DISGUSTING. Believe me, I spared you the worst. This photo looks sparkling and spotless in comparison (well, partly because there ARE sparkles, but whatever). Here you can catch a glimpse of the affluent neighbors who use their clout to shut down any and all expansion proposals. This charming dining space showed off a bit of the park's history. During last century's clean-up and maintenance day (next one TBA), the park uncovered all this junk and put it on display. How thoughtful. Yes...I imagine that playing with your "wacky duck" here would get you a ticket. I got lost in the mirror maze and had to follow little kids, who came in long after me, in order to get out. But more importantly, A RANDOM CREEPY MAN ASKED TO GO IN HERE WITH ME. That's Lakeside for you. These will get you wet. At least, if you're into that sort of bumping, they will. Yes, prepare for unacceptable amounts of wetness here. "They say it takes two to tango. If that's the case, then would you like to be my tango partner?" --actual Lakeside resident. I think they got jealous of Deja Vu at Six Flags and had to get their own version. It's just like at Grandma's house! Obligatory picture of the lake you are on the side of. And a lighthouse. Note the picturesque mountain background. Unsurprisingly, the boats here are powered by speed. Because we all know cars can climb stairs. Mini Go-Karts, anyone? Yeah, me neither. Lakeside is a very accepting place and won't judge you if you're interested in doing both. AS LONG AS THEY CAN WATCH. I know many of you are quite proficient at operating your own controls, so this should be no trouble for you. Sadly, this ride is not allowed on the New Texas Giant. I got myself stuck upside down on this TWICE. Completely intentional, and completely terrifying. When will I ever learn? Also, I got my car stuck in continuous-slow-flip-mode. Not my worst ride ever (a flip is still a flip), but very annoying. A fire happened at an undisclosed location near the park. The infamous "REDIT" sign (I prefer MetaFilter). If you studied Latin, you already know what this means. And before you say "YOUR MOM studied Latin," well, my mom minored in Latin. So there. And goodbye.

Thanks for that. I usually hear to hit it first, unless you're one of those people who would rather be soaked on a drive as opposed to throughout your day at the park (I'm not sure I have a preference on this). I'm still not positive what I'll do, but it's very rare that I let an available credit get away from me, so I'm definitely looking to ride it once.

Front is definitely worth it on Storm Runner, Fahrenheit, and Lightning Racer. I personally have nothing against the backseat of Wildcat, but from what I've heard you may love it or hate it.

So I just joined the Six Flags Advisory Panel with SFDK as my home park. If no one beats me to it, I could try to post anything interesting they send me, but somehow I question whether I'll hear anything even remotely tantalizing.

Yeah, "early entry" definitely doesn't translate to "short lines." Last time I used it, all it did was get me my Millennium Force credit more quickly than I would've otherwise. The next two days, I didn't even bother using it.

Precisely what I was thinking about as I read the news on the last page. By the way, I wouldn't mind that at all, as I think the MFlyer grilles are vaguely creepy, and I adore old-school open-front woodie trains (a la Prior & Church). Really, if the views on S:UF are that much greater without the front, I'll just be disappointed if they end up putting it right back on. Oh, well, that's the kind of thing I probably won't even remember when I'm actually at the park.

Yeah. I can't speak for whether they're right or wrong for the park, but the new additions at least look pathetic.

1996: 1 credit 199x: 1 credit 2000: 1 credit 2008: 6 credits 2009: 48 credits 2010: 95 credits 2011: 199 credits 2012: 9 credits and counting Total: 360 The success of 2011 may not be repeated in a long time, if ever. Beating that number would require extensive international travel at this point. This year should most resemble 2009, as I'm expecting about 50-60 credits. I'm glad I once made a similar post, or I would never remember this and would have to go look at my spreadsheet.

^I don't think I'd ever want to be anywhere near any train that once operated on Son of Beast.

Oh, man. I wasn't that interested before, but I think I'm sold now. Hopefully riders will have a fair chance of feeling the tower sway during any given ride. That sounds exhilarating.

^Hopefully...and if not, then they should.

I always love seeing reports from NYC. I suddenly find myself a bit scared to try out the Staten Island Ferry, though... Sounds like a great itinerary you planned out!

So I'm not the only one clinging to a faint hope that the comment you're referencing could've been (tentatively) serious rather than 100% messin' with the person. Though admittedly, for me it's pointless to think about since I have no idea how to get to Knoebels without the help of a TPR bus. Working on figuring that out for future years, though.

That's pretty much what I was getting at in my thinking. I'm not as big on unobstructed views as a lot of people (for example, I rarely go for the front on inverts), but with a lot of Premier and Intamin train designs I need the extra open space in front of me that comes with sitting in the front of a car.

And since there are only 6 rows, from your review it sounds like seating might not matter too much for many people. While I'm often one to completely ignore the front on any given ride in favor of the very back, on some rides I strongly prefer the front and the front of any car, and I'm guessing on this one I might especially like rows 1 and 4.

I thought it looked like the St. Louis Arch in the recent picture posted. But I can understand that maybe it just kind of...looks like that naturally.

I recall Steel Hawg being placed at least a little out of the way. However, I don't remember if I was annoyed by this, or if it just seemed strange and less than ideal. For some reason it took me a while to not get lost looking for Boomerang at SFDK. It's surrounded by flat rides instead of being in a little "coaster section" like the others, and it also doesn't seem to be as visible throughout the park.

Sounds like it might be best to avoid the park when it's crowded? When I was there on a late April Saturday last year, it practically seemed shoulder-to-shoulder packed. However, I don't recall running into any problems on any visit, so I don't know if it's hit-or-miss or if you were just really unlucky. Anyway, nice report! It really is an attractive park with a whole lot to do and some fun surprises.

^Wasn't there a collision some years back? I did hear that the cost to replace the brakes would be exorbitant due to all the necessary changes, unfortunately.

^^^Yeah, I think I've mostly given up on trying to make extensive "park plans" unless they were suggested by others or at least seem really obvious. I found I kept wanting to put favorites and new credits first when that's often far from the best way to hit a given park. Plus, Q-Bots make planning a lot less important and more carefree. I've definitely learned my lesson about staying alert to what rides I need to hit first or at certain times of day at various parks, though, having been burned by the occasional choice to ignore warnings of that sort.

Agreed. It adds to the already stellar atmosphere, and in some cases can help make waiting in line more enjoyable. Wait wait wait...there is bad food at SDC?

If he was truly down with the clown, he'd know that ICP does not take kindly to being billed to perform without their prior consent. Other than that, I think this proposal is good to go!

^^Knew I wouldn't be the only one to think that. I am nothing but stoked about this ride.