Canobie Coaster

^ Mama's is one of the main reasons I haven't had as much of Dollywood's food as other people, but I have no regrets. I'm guessing the haunted houses you're thinking of didn't cost $15-16 though. The only issue with Reverse Time is that it has a limited capacity. SBF has a larger model I've ridden at Quassy, but I oddly thought the smaller one was better. The smaller one has airtime while the larger one focuses on laterals.

^ If your focus is the coasters, you should have plenty of time. The only wrinkle would be Texas Stingray if it isn't on the Quick Queue like some of the newer Busch/SeaWorld rides.

That's a bit concerning they don't have a contingency plan if another mishap happens with a Coaster train.

I'm not surprised Millennium Force was added to FastLane Plus or that Gatekeeper was removed from FastLane Plus. I am surprised Valravn went down to regular FastLane since that has had the longest line on my past few visits outside of Steel Vengeance and Maverick.

Pigeon Forge Fun One of my goals this trip was to knockout some new coaster credits in Pigeon Forge. So I began with the Island at Pigeon Forge, a vibrant and energetic shopping center along the strip. This complex is home to the Great Smoky Mountain Wheel that can be seen for miles away. That would have been a totally respectable reason to justify my visit. But you know me better. I was there for the Spinning Parrots kiddie coaster. Welcome to the Island. Dick would make for a good Scrooge in the Christmas Carol. As I’ve ridden more and more of these SBF Visa spinning coasters, I’ve started to like them less and less. It’s probably because they’re everywhere now. But at least they’re comfortable. 2 out of 10 Most are drawn to the Island by the Ferris Wheel. I was drawn by this dinky little coaster. What I did really enjoy was Reverse Time, this innocent looking junior Trabant/wipeout. I hadn’t seen one that small, so I wanted the new flat ride credit. And let me tell you, this ride does not mess around. Once it reaches its max height of 15ish feet, you get some surprising floater air more akin to what you’d get on a frisbee ride. Combine that with laterals and you have a bonafide, little thrill machine. 8 out of 10 I kid you not, this ride had some serious airtime. I then continued down the parkway to Rowdy Bear Ridge, which was home to one of the most bizarre coasters I’ve ever seen, the Alpine Flyer. Really it’s more like a shooting dark ride with two key distinctions. One, it’s gravity powered. Two, it’s not a dark ride. You see, this ride is entirely outdoors. So you’re given this laser gun to shoot these unthemed targets. The most bizarre thing is that not all the targets are actually targets. WTF? Only like a third of them have a sensor for you to hit. I think the ride system could work if it were themed and indoors. But as it stands, the Alpine Flyer is basically a slow, suspended wild mouse with no drops and a cheap shooting gimmick. 2 out of 10 Cool concept on paper. But the execution felt cheap and flawed. It was then time to finally experience the Jurassic Jungle Boat. There was no way Emily would let me burn money at this train-wreck in past visits, so I took advantage of this solo visit. Most girlfriends have to worry about their boyfriend going to strip clubs when they’re unsupervised. Mine has to worry about me riding kiddie credits and crappy dark rides. I want to start by talking about the ride system. Even though you’re in a boat and a trough filled with water, you are pulled through the layout by a chain. This is especially comical as you struggle to turn a corner. It’s like watching someone move a sofa into an apartment. As expected the animatronics were delightfully awful. They looked worse than Howard the Duck. They were bad on their own, but the fact the ride didn’t even try to hide the hardware made it even funnier. But the funniest thing was how the dinosaurs had banshee-like shrieks instead of roars. Jurassic Jungle Boat was objectively awful. While I certainly chuckled, I can’t justify giving this place any more of my money. But you totally should since it’s a crowning achievement of fail. 2 out of 10 My life is now complete. How did these wax figures beat me into line?!? The animatronics were all downhill from here. And it wouldn’t be a visit to Pigeon Forge without riding an alpine coaster, so I made sure to ride my favorite one, the Smoky Mountain Alpine Coaster (SMAC). I’ve ridden this one a few times, but I’ve never done it at night. Unlike the one at Goats on the Roof which is in complete darkness, SMAC is adorned with more rainbow colored lights than a pride parade. It feels like you’re experiencing a real-life version of Mario Kart’s Rainbow Road. But unlike how I drive in Mario Kart, SMAC had quite a bit of autobraking- more than I remember in the past. That being said, it’s still an incredibly long ride with some decent laterals and maybe a pop of air along the way. 7 out of 10 As cool as the lights looked, I sort of wish it was in complete darkness like the one at Goats. One of the attractions I was most looking forward to was the Mountain Monster. It was home to a thrill tower from Soarin’ Eagle. It’s very similar to the one at Foxwoods up in my neck of the woods or Branson’s Bigfoot Tower. Except this one had a third attraction- this pseudo skycoaster thing. It’s actually the same ride system as the TerrorDactyl ride in Colorado that is a staple in viral videos. However, it wasn’t to be. The Mountain Monster had closed for the season. This was the lone attraction I saw closed for the season. So I ate my sorrows away at Mama’s Farmhouse. If you love southern food and lots of it, you need to make Mama’s Farmhouse a priority the next time you’re in pigeon forge. It’s all-you-can-eat and unlike Old Country Buffet or Golden Corral, the food is actually amazing. Fried chicken, fried catfish, biscuits, and gravy. I love the south. While the anchor of any Pigeon Forge visit will always be Dollywood, I will always make time for these overpriced tourist traps. It’s our civic duty as Americans.

I'm not sure if you want to add the Island in Pigeon Forge since it has a coaster plus a few other attractions. 7D Adventure Flying Horse Carousel Great Smoky Mountain Wheel Great Smoky Mountain Wheel Island Bumper Cars Island Bumper Cars Reverse Time Spinning Parrots Wave Rider (now removed)

Dollywood Mountain Slidewinder has closed. I know you told me to lay off the kids balloon towers, but I saw an empty listing for Treetop Tower. Feel free to include these photos or remove Treetop Tower.

^ I know my frustration with it is that I rode the superior version in Sweden that actually flipped so I knew what the ride was capable of if run correctly.

That sign looks fantastic!

^ It was the same for me a few weekends ago. I asked the employee at the entrance if they'd close the queue early and they said they'd only do it if it were in excess of 3-4 hours.

The fact that Lightning Rod exists at such a well-rounded, top notch park like Dollywood makes it even better. There isn't a bad time to visit Dollywood, but it's even better at Christmas. Thanks! And more is likely on the way since they still have a huge plot of cleared land by Wildwood Grove. I certainly wasn't complaining that Smoky Mountain Christmas started before Thanksgiving. I figured temperature related closures would have been less likely early in the season. It took me several tries to finally get on Lightning Rod, but it was a game changer for Dollywood's line-up.

According to an article on the OC Register (Link), Disney's CFO is assuming both Shanghai Disneyland and Hong Kong Disneyland will be closed for 2 months, resulting in a $175 million loss. https://www.ocregister.com/2020/02/04/disney-expects-coronavirus-outbreak-to-keep-shanghai-and-hong-kong-theme-parks-closed-for-two-months/

According to an article on the OC Register (Link), Disney's CFO is assuming both Shanghai Disneyland and Hong Kong Disneyland will be closed for 2 months, resulting in a $175 million loss. https://www.ocregister.com/2020/02/04/disney-expects-coronavirus-outbreak-to-keep-shanghai-and-hong-kong-theme-parks-closed-for-two-months/

^ After foolishly declining the poncho, I effectively scared a few TPR members out of the queue line when they saw how drenched I was. But it was well worth it since it was a really unique and terrifying rapids ride.

^ That'll be nice before the 4th of July weekend!

^ The only reason I'd say to keep refreshing is what happened on 1/24 when the boarding passes went online a minute early. But the tell for me was when people started cheering so I still had plenty of time to react and get one.

^ I'll be interested to hear what people think of the launch since the acceleration looks great off-ride.

Dollywood- Smoky Mountain Coasterfest Smoky Mountain Christmas is an amazing time to visit Dollywood. It’s especially amazing if it’s during Smoky Mountain Coasterfest, an event through ACE that is the best time of year to get night rides on the world’s best coaster. Lightning Rod played hard to get with me, but once I finally rode it, I was addicted. It immediately became my number one coaster. And after an additional 40 rides on this masterpiece in the span of 28 hours, it only separated itself further from the pack. Santa- "What do you want for Christmas?" Me- "An empty station on Lightning Rod." Lightning Rod is perfection from start of finish. There isn’t a single moment of dead track. Just look at these elements. - Surprisingly forceful launch - Ejector pop 200+ feet in the air - Big drop that’s as good as any other RMC drop - Gargantuan wave turn with 3-4 seconds of sustained, sideways airtime - WTF turnaround with 3-4 seconds of sustained, sideways airtime - Off-axis airtime hill with powerful ejector airtime - A rare straight hill with even more powerful ejector airtime - The legendary quad down with even more powerful ejector airtime - A speed hill that makes the quad down feel like a quint down - A half loop that has (you guessed it) strong airtime When the worst part of a ride is an ejector pop almost 200+ feet in the air, you know a ride is unbelievable. And this all takes place on a heavily wooded mountain at what feels like 100 mph. Even better is the fact that most of my rides occurred at night. Beast fans will be triggered, but Lightning Rod is easily the world’s best night ride. The entire back section is pitch black and when you finally emerge from the darkness, you rocket down the quad down with dazzling Christmas lights before you. It’s magical. Part of the event included free cinnamon bread, but I couldn’t pull myself away from Lightning Rod. The coaster is that good. I’m breaking my rating system for this one because Lightning Rod deserves it. 12 out of 10 I'm still not used to seeing the door open. What a beautiful sky...and an even more beautiful ride. Even at the end of the ride, Lightning Rod is still hauling. Funny story about this photo. I accidentally took a wrong turn on the way to Dollywood and ended up in some apartment community...which just happened to have some sweet views of Lightning Rod. Not only did I ride Lightning Rod an unhealthy amount of times in normal park hours and an energetic ERT session, but the event also included a rare photo walkback for the coaster. Even during the walkback tour, Lightning Rod was harder to photograph than Bigfoot. Part of the reason why Lightning Rod is such a great night ride is exactly why it’s a royal pain to photograph. It's all tucked away in that valley. But I did get some nice shots of the elusive first second drop. Good luck getting these shots on a regular day. We actually had ERT on two coasters. And because of the plunging evening temperatures and Lightning Rod’s history, I figured if one ERT session were to have a hiccup, it would have been that one. In fact, Lightning Rod only went down once over two days. And even that was just for a protein spill. So what ride crapped the bed for our ERT session? Blazing Fury. Some riders even had to be evacuated. And honestly, I think that was the highlight of their day. But it did reopen later in the day and I got my ride. As a coaster, it’s nothing special outside of one surprising pop of air. As a dark ride, it’s a nice, retro attraction. 7 out of 10 If you told me this ride would have more downtime than Lightning Rod, I wouldn't have believed you. Another big reason for my return visit was to finally experience Wildwood Grove. In my March visit, I saw the new area sitting idle from atop Thunderhead. This time, I finally got to explore the area. Wildwood Grove is an excellent family area. Almost every ride there can be experienced by parents and kids simultaneously. And the tree that’s the centerpiece of the area looks stunning at night. This so perfectly Dollywood. The one attraction I did experience was Dragonflier. If you told me a decade ago that Vekoma could produce an inverted coaster this smooth, I wouldn’t have believed you. It’s glass smooth. Dragonflier is a family coaster with bite. That overbank is a borderline inversion and pulls some serious Gs. I can’t believe that element is on a family ride. Then the helices came close to making my legs tingle. 6.5 out of 10 Dragonflier is 90% family coaster. And the other 10% is this completely awesome and out-of-place pseudo inversion. Usually I go back and forth whether or not Tennessee Tornado or Wild Eagle is the second best ride in the park. Thunderhead ended that debate. These were the fastest rides I’ve ever gotten on Thunderhead. While it had a bit of a shuffle to it, the airtime was fantastic. The drawn out hills had some nice sustained floater airtime and the turnarounds (big and small) had powerful pops of ejector air. 8 out of 10 I don't remember Thunderhead ever running this well. Wildwood Grove offers some new shots of Thunderhead. Tennessee Tornado is a big “What If” for me. What if Arrow hadn’t gone bankrupt shortly after this ride was built? Because Tennessee Tornado is a wild and immaculately smooth ride. That drop through the mountain is incredible. Getting sustained airtime like that in complete darkness is dreamlike. And then you have a floaty first inversion and forceful second and third inversions. 8 out of 10 Dollywood definitely doesn't skimp on the lights. It's weird actually being able to see the loop. Wild Eagle is still one of the weirder wing coasters if you ask me. In many ways, it feels like your usual B&M floorless layout just with wing coaster trains. And that isn’t a bad thing if you ask me. I love the straight first drop. It feels more like a drop on a hyper coaster. It’s a shame B&M doesn’t have more of these on loopers. And then the rest of the ride is quite scenic and floaty. 8 out of 10 Fly like an eagle. Or if you're an enthusiast, whine about the vest restraints and forcelessness. Another shot courtesy of the Lightning Rod walkback. After the mine was closed in my March visit, I made sure to take a ride on Mystery Mine. While I love the drops and theming, it really is an awkwardly paced coaster. 7.5 out of 10 This is the prettiest looking mine I've ever seen. I love the ending...and am confused by the start. While Dragonflier helped take the burden off Firechaser Express, I’d still argue the latter is the park’s premier family coaster. It’s really impressive how many pops (albeit very, very tiny pops) of airtime this ride has. And then it mixes in multiple launches, some laterals, and even a backwards bit. It really is a jack-of-all trades. 7 out of 10 I just wish something like this existed when I was a kid. The only non-coaster I rode was Drop Line, which is a seriously underrated drop tower if you ask me. I think everyone agrees the view is amazing, but I find the drop as good as an Intamin tower. 9 out of 10 Plus Drop Line is an absolute tank and will only close if Hell freezes over. Drop Line takes you way above Wildwood Grove. With each visit to Dollywood, I love it more and more. It goes without saying I’d love the park that is home to my favorite roller coaster, but Dollywood is so much more than just Lightning Rod. It has a boatload of other high-quality attractions, well-produced shows, great theming, friendly employees, yummy food, and I could just keep going on and on. What I’m trying to say is that Dollywood is one of the best parks in the world. And going during Smoky Mountain Coasterfest and making some new friends was just icing on the cake. Goodbye from Dollywood

Great report! Europeans really do love the English swears.

People were either going to complain that it didn't always duel (like Twisted Colossus) or complain that the pit stop took too long due to dispatches. I personally would take the guaranteed duel since the other option would have me stacked on the final brake run after a non-dueling ride.

^ Halloween is a much more exciting time at parks than Valentine's Day! I'm really lucky to have the New England parks up my way since they're relatively close to each other and each one has their strength. SFNE for thrill rides, Canobie for charm, Story Land and Santa's Village for cuteness, Lake Compounce for Halloween, and Funtown/Palace Playland if I want a good lobster roll and ride roller coasters while I'm there.

Great report! While there are no coasters, Japan is such a fascinating country that I have no problem seeing a report on their culture.

Six Flags New England- Fright Fest I’m all for anything that keeps amusement parks open past the summer months. Whenever I’ve visited Six Flags for Fright Fest, I’ve never done the haunts. Just the coasters. On this visit, I decided to try something different. I decided to try the haunts. And I’m going to be honest, I was terrified. I was terrified to see just how bad they’d be. Keep in mind, I had low expectations. I wasn’t expecting Hollywood Horror Nights, but if a smaller park like Canobie can pump out decent haunts, surely Six Flags could. I thought that was especially true since they were a $35 upcharge (or free with my membership thankfully). Oh how naive I was. I started with Midnight Mansion, which is in a downright bizarre location- Houdini’s queue line. The queue line is the ride’s exit. The preshow literally takes place on the ride platform. And then the haunt goes through the queue line. It’s so stupid that it’s sort of comical. The indoor portion looks cheap, but at least there’s no dead spots in terms of theming or scare actors. The problem is the outdoor part. There was nothing. No theming, no scare actors. Just nothing. And at the time, Midnight Mansion was in contention for the worst haunt I had ever done. Little did I know that it would be the park’s second best haunt… 3 out of 10 First Canobie and now Six Flags. Why do New England parks like closing their indoor rides in favor of haunts this time of year? Six Flags New England’s other four haunts are in the Boonies…aka SFNE’s Picnic Grove. You don’t even feel like you’re in the rest of the park when you’re there. It’s like the Bat at Kings Island. You have to travel through the woods, down this steep hill, and over a wooden bridge. Believe it or not, this ominous looking path starts in the kids area. For me to really appreciate a haunt, I need to be immersed. This was impossible with Nightmares and Slasher Circus 3D. You see, both these haunts take place in a food stand. Nightmares was a nightmare. The scare actors didn’t look like they wanted to be there and it just wasn’t cohesive. The only thing that made me jump was the employee with an air gun at the exit that blasted me in the face. 2 out of 10 Some high quality theming right there. But the crowning achievement of bad haunts was Slasher Circus 3D. You don those cheap paper 3D glasses Blockbuster used to provide with 3D films. I kept waiting for the haunt to use 3D effects, but it never did. All it did was play off-tune instruments really loudly. Oh and there was another employee by the exit with an air gun. Except this one missed us initially, so she ran down the exit path to blast us. WTF? 1 out of 10 Words cannot describe how bad this haunt was. The final two haunts took place in the woods. I was hopeful SFNE could utilize that setting to their advantage. Terror Tales is a long haunt through half-baked fantasy IPs. Honestly, I really liked the concept. There was just one problem. The lack of scare actors. I think I counted three total in a five minute haunt. And one was so bad it was laughable. As you walked into the castle for the Queen of Hearts, there was a dude dressed in drag. That about sums up the Six Flags scare actor experience. 3 out of 10 I think the last time I was in SFNE's Picnic Pavilion was for TPR's Bizarro Bash back in 2011. The final haunt blew me away. Aftermath: Zombie’s Revenge was a perfectly…decent haunt. Not good, but decent. But for Six Flags, that’s a home run. This haunt uses the wooded setting to its advantage. That setting plus cheap, ragtag set-pieces are perfect for a zombie apocalypse. And there were some neat effects too like quicksand (simulated with a hidden trampoline) and a lighted sea. Like Terror Tales, this one’s weakness was the lack of scare actors. Thankfully what few scare actors present scare were actually quite good. Some even chased people outside of the maze! 6 out of 10 That man in the burlap sack was consistently chasing guests out of the haunt. Fright Fest also brings twists to a few attractions. The most notable is the fact that the New England SkyScreamer runs backwards. One of the most underrated benefits of this is the fact that it protects your face from the chilling autumn breeze. 8.5 out of 10 However, the SkyScreamer queue took an eternity due to a guest altercation. A guest had apparently placed their glasses on the ride platform and the ride attendant accidentally stepped on them. That guest then did the only logical thing they could think of- call the police. Not security, but 911. They then angrily stood on the ride platform refusing to move. Security eventually came, but it took 20 minutes to sort out. Traveling in reverse 400 feet in the car is quite intimidating. The same could be said about an angry guest that required security to escort her away. But my favorite modification is what they do to the Tea Cups, err I mean Terror Twist. SFNE’s Tea Cups are already ridiculously easy to spin, so when you add in fog and lighting effects, it becomes one of the most dizzying rides on the planet. 10 out of 10 I know this looks like crap from the outside. But the Tea Cups overlay is actually awesome. I also got my last rides of the season on Wicked Cyclone and Superman. Unfortunately, I was only able to get one ride on Wicked Cyclone due to one train operations. But my one ride was worth it. Wicked Cyclone may be towards the bottom of my RMC rankings, but it’s still a fast-paced flurry of airtime. And per usual, it was running faster than the summer. This thing loves the cold. 9 out of 10 I have to give SFNE credit that they're usually pretty good about running two trains on the major coasters. And in the rare event they're down to one train, they do usually have a sign like this at the entrance. The undoubted highlight was Superman. Back when it opened, I preferred it in the back row. But something happened during the Bizarro transformation. It started to feel sluggish back there. Because of that, I became a front row rider. But it has been no secret that Superman has been running faster than it has in a long time in 2019. And on this October night, I was reconverted into a back seat rider on the Man of Steel. On this day, even the final bunny hills were giving sustained ejector. Heck, even the little speed hill after the overbank gave a pop of air. That never happens! Superman may never top the Golden Ticket Awards again, but these rides brought me back to my rides in the mid-2000s. Superman made a triumphant return to my top 10 steel list. I’ve long said it has one of the best layouts on earth and when it hauls, it’s a truly special ride. 10 out of 10 Superman was even more super than usual on this night. So in short, come to Fright Fest for the rides not the haunts.

For all the people who complained about "their giga" being too small and too short, that's quite the turnout!

^^ When I called at the end of November, I got the response that they were closed for the season.