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"Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Thu May 11, 2017 6:45 pm
by DoinItForTheFame
I came across this ridiculous story, and thought it was worth sharing with you all!

Just when I thought I had heard it all... I swear, if he wins the $10 million I will officially give up on society.

Man Claims The New Unicorn Frappuccinio at Starbucks Made Him Gay

Queens, New York-

Charles Woodson, age 43, is claiming that a beverage he ordered at Starbucks has turned him into a homosexual. Woodson claims that he was dared to try the new Unicorn Frappuccinio from fellow co-workers and now believes that he is in fact gay.

“I don’t know what to do, I’ve got a wife and three kids but thats all out the door thanks to Starbucks.” said Woodson

“My construction buddies dared me to try it and I did, it looks like it’s a drink for daisies and believe me it is. As soon as I drank it I felt a difference in my body, I saw an attractive gentleman in the store and thought, wow I’d love to get up in that!” said Woodson

Woodson is preparing to sue the Starbucks company for this whole ordeal and is looking for a settlement in the range of $10 million dollars.

“It’s not fair yah know, tough guys can’t enjoy a beverage like that without being called gay and then something like this happens.” said Woodson


Source.

When life gets you down just remember: you could be the guy who is dumb enough to believe a Starbucks drink turned him gay. :lol:

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Thu May 11, 2017 7:02 pm
by Nrthwnd
Really? I mean REALLY?

Well, we'll take them, any way we can get them, you know. ;)

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 3:25 am
by MayTheGForceBeWithYou
Disclaimer

SADFLAG.com is a satire and parody site. Names are fictionalized unless we are parodying something or someone real.

Satire sites are still always a fun read regardless. Onion's still the king of that genre, but some of their other stories were still pretty funny.

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 5:12 am
by DoinItForTheFame
^ Well damn!!

However, even though it may fictionalized, I feel like there is still someone out there dumb enough to actually attempt a lawsuit like this! :lol:

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 7:48 am
by boldikus
You really thought this was real with a line like:

“My construction buddies dared me to try it and I did, it looks like it’s a drink for daisies and believe me it is. As soon as I drank it I felt a difference in my body, I saw an attractive gentleman in the store and thought, wow I’d love to get up in that!” said Woodson


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 9:09 am
by PKI Jizzman
I can see the headline tomorrow:

"Man claims Budweiser (not Bud Light) turned him straight"

....

"I got roped into going to a sports-ball game and my boss bought us all a round of beers. I thought it was a cider, but it was really a full calorie Budweiser. Before I knew it, we were in the 9th inning and I was 8 beers deep and bought a Bryce Harper jersey and downloaded Bumble and swiped right on 1,947 women. What is my life now?"

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 11:01 am
by Nrthwnd
^ :lmao:

But hey - might be worth a try, right?

:cool:

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Sat Sep 16, 2017 3:40 pm
by Nrthwnd
Is Starbucks selling that "Gay Coffee" still? :Pr

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

PostPosted: Sat Sep 16, 2017 4:39 pm
by Dombot
^ :lol: Not in the US at least, it was a one-week only thing. Sad, I actually was in the minority that kinda enjoyed the stuff. Oh well.