CaptainUnknown

I burnt my hand trying to put out my pants.

^Well, according to RCDB, the people of Central Florida are in for some crazy airtime and a beating.

So Kisses decided she wanted to be a parrot. Yo ho, yo ho! A pirate's life for me!

I'm not sure what the writer was on when they wrote about Goliath, but can I get some too?

That moment when you stop for ice cream at a gas station in a suit with a band-aid on your forehead after a wedding reception with an open bar.

National Cheeseburger Day was Wednesday, and while this wasn't the burger I had that day, I present to you the Buffalo Wild Wings Cheese Curd Burger.

The Fun Spots are awesome and I wish more people knew about them/went to them. But with Disney/Universal/SeaWorld/Busch Gardens, why would they even know about it/care? They should because they're awesome, that's why. As for Oz, yes it was creepy. Those statues I posted, there were dozens more that I didn't get pictures of. Death by Weeping Angel that looks like Cinderella. #dontblink. It would be worse if you didn't even get the credit like me. The one that was abandoned is somewhere in the Carolinas and is open for a couple weeks out of the year for special events. It's a destination on my bucket list.

I don't know if I would call it awesome, but it will make a good story to tell. Even if it's just as the joke in a stand-up routine. It was a wedding with an open bar. #drinkupmeheartiesyoho

While I didn't get my knees smashed on the ride, they were jostled around and the ride wasn't the smoothest. In the words of Doing it for the fame: La Vibrator.

It was 5 minutes from closing at a kiddie park in the middle of nowheresville, South Dakota. The park doesn't exactly know what a crowd is. It was 5 grown-a$$ adults, so I don't know if that makes it better or worse. And there's a whole lot of the park I didn't get pictures of, including a castle surrounded by storybook and assorted fairytale creatures.

Journey 7: Storybook Land & The Land of Oz AKA Locked in a Theme Park. You read that right. It's not clickbait. I literally got locked inside a theme park. But more on that later. My cousin was getting married in the middle of nowhere, aka Aberdeen, South Dakota. Just out of curiosity, I scrolled through Google Earth just to see what exactly was in this particular part of flyover country. I come across Storybook Land and the Land of Oz. Curiosity piqued, I looked into the park and lo and behold, it did have a kiddy coaster. Knowing this, I began my plotting to get to the park. I realized it would be easy since my sister was currently in rehearsals for a community theatre production of Wizard of Oz as Glinda/Auntie Em. So I could rope her in to my scheme. For whatever reason, I always get sick around the time I go to a wedding. So, I'm just sitting in the backseat of the car with a swollen head and a death wish. When we got into town, the family was having a picnic party in a park. At that point, I just wanted to stay in the hotel and sleep. I was dragged out to the park for some family time. I grabbed a plate and sank down into a chair, just waiting until I could go back to the hotel. Some food in my belly, I regained enough consciousness to realize that Storybook Land was across the street from where the picnic was. I excused myself from the picnic and made my way over, immediate family saying they'd follow shortly. At the gates of the free-to-enter park. And of course, you gotta follow the yellow brick road. So I made my way to the ticket booth to be informed that the rides were about to close in the next couple minutes, so that if I had purchased my credit-whoring tickets, I would not be likely to get to use it before the ride closed. But that the park does remain open 24 hours. (Spoiler alert, it wasn't) Coaster sign. I at least got a picture of the coaster's sign, but not the ride itself. Why? There were still little kids riding the coaster with parents nearby. And I realized it wouldn't be in my best interest as a sickly looking, childless, adult male to be taking pictures of not my children. Since sister wanted a picture with a Glinda statue, I had to find it before they got over to the park, so I headed over to the Land of Oz section of the park. And it started with a mini-walkthrough of the Gale house as it was being swept up by the tornado. And the damn thing had an honest to God jumpscare that got me. But on the other side of it, I did find the statues I was looking for. The whole gang Just Dorothy And Glinda, herself Family got over, we got our pictures, and then decided to follow the yellow brick road through the woods. Since I wanted to go through the Tornado house again and show the family, I lead us back to the entrance of it. It was now locked. This should have been a clue that something was amiss. But since we had yet to realize we were in a 1980s slasher movie, we started walking along the yellow brick road. We passed little vignettes re-enacting scenes from the story. Like finding the Tin Man. I don't remember him having a house, though. Since it was dark and late, we made plans to come back out to the park to get a good look around in the daytime. My coaster-starved self was happy about that. (spoiler alert, that didn't happen) Some spooky old trees They're not too happy about their apples being plucked. The Cowardly Lion had a fun little cave. The Witch's Castle. Oh noes! Dorothy's been captured by flying monkeys! Spooky ghost. (I was working with a new camera, so I was still toying around with the flash) I wish I'd taken this sign's advice. We finish the trail through Oz and there was no Emerald City. Bummer. Since it was dark, late, and mosquito season, we realized it was high time to head out and back to the hotel, talking about coming back later. So we get to the entrance to the park and find that the gate has been closed and locked. What? Let's backtrack a minute here: I was told the park would remain open 24 hours. So why is the gate closed with a chain bolting it shut? We were locked in. The ticket booth/gift shop/restaurant was closed with the lights off. Did that really just happen? On the park map, there looked like another entrance on the other side of the park. So we started heading back that way before realizing that there was no other exit. So we headed back to the main entrance hoping to spot someone that could let us out before we resorted to camping in the Lion's cave overnight or attempting to pole vault over the fence. Luckily, we did find a member of park security on a golf cart who was able to let us out. Well, four out of five of us anyway. Somehow, dad got separated from us and security had to find him and usher him out. After escaping Alcatraz Storybook Land we all decided that we would not return to the park on our way out of town. P.S. Larry, if you're reading this, take what you want (if anything as this is a small park and I got no actual ride images) for the index.

Reverse.

it has a single rider line tho, right? And it is awesome. I had near walk-ons using the single rider line last month, bypassing what was easily a 30 minute wait. Of course, that could just be my luck with it.

I saw It: Chapter 2 on Saturday night in a mostly full theater. I have never seen so many phones out in a movie before. At least a couple people filming. One person took a photo with the f**king flash on. At least Bill Hader was good in the film.

You're the nasty egg people who ate all my waffles.

Hey, I was looking at the SEAS Platinum pass for next year, and I see that it includes 2 free guest tickets (on select days). So my question is, could I use those at a different park than I got the pass from? E.g. purchasing it from SeaWorld San Antonio, using the free tix at BGT/SWO.

Hey, I was just looking at the SEAS Platinum annual pass for next year, and was wondering if it was usually that ridiculously low if purchased from this park? It's nearly a third the price of the annual pass if purchased from BGT/SWO. Also, I assume I could easily spend a morning at ZDT before staying until close at SeaWorld San Antonio?

^Dammit. I was going to post that exact coaster. Going to have to go with Kumba, then.

^The press release says nearly 5 stories, so about 50 feet.

^^Sorry I've been so late on thanking you, Bert, but I was hiding my face in embarrassment because I somehow forgot that SeaWorld, which is adding some GCI hotness next year, is ridiculously close to Six Flags. So thank you for the advice, but I've officially postponed my trip to next year and go to SeaWorld, too.

Narcissism.

Turns out there is a slight chance I could make my first visit to the park the weekend of September 13th. I know that's a fright fest weekend and would expect crowds, but is it possible to do a weekend at the park, hit up everything (minus the houses) without Flash pass? I would likely do Friday night, all Saturday, Sunday morning/early afternoon.

New Texas Giant. After I got off, I pretty much immediately went to the airport to fly home.

Runaway Mountain--Six Flags Over Texas. The apparently not as awesome cousin to Skull Mountain.

Sorry to quote my own post here, but now that the ride has been officially announced, above all I think that it will be fun. It's a great addition to the park and one that most parks could only dream of. I've been wanting to get out to Kings Island for a while now, and while that may yet be a few years away, I am very excited to have another world-class coaster being built. Congratulations to Kings Island on your announcement!