Electerik

I wear my glasses on everything. No strap, unless the park requires it. And I've never had any trouble. (I do use a strap at water parks, though.) Just a small sampling of the coasters I've worn my glasses on: Top Thrill Dragster The Voyage Manta I've even worn them on slow inverting rides like Hammerhead at KBF and Ranger at Darien Lake. I did use a strap on Steel Hawg for my one ride on it, because it worried me a bit looking at it--but in retrospect, I don't think I needed it. Of course, you should do what makes you comfortable, park rules notwithstanding. But, to me, the safest place for my glasses is on my face. /I do sometimes bring my old glasses on road trips as emergency back-up, in case disaster strikes. But it hasn't happened yet.

Disney's pricing strategy over the last few years has finally paid off (resulting in small attendance gains for them and losses for their competitors this last year), so why would they stop now? The question is, will UO and SWO attempt to follow again, and continue to get burned?

It was very brief. But I should also mention--as if it's not awesome enough already--that they play YYZ before the Sea Lions Tonight show.

SeaWorld After Dark During summer, when SeaWorld Orlando is open late, the hours of 6:00pm to 10:00pm feature rock music throughout the park, live DJ's, and three special shows that you can't see during the day. "After Dark" is included with park admission, and so too is this update included with your normal subscription to Erik & Smisty's Florida Oddventures. The After Dark soundtrack includes many stupid songs, such as Owl City's "Fireflies." However, they also play "Limelight" by Rush, so I can't hate on it too bad. The first stop on our night time adventure, Sea Lions Tonight--which makes fun of all the other SeaWorld shows. No, really, they make fun of their own shows--which is just one more reason why SeaWorld is awesome. The ever popular mime. Sadly, she did not take him up on his offer. If you like the mime normally, you'll love Sea Lions Tonight--because the mime's not just preshow in this one; he's all through it. Here he is making fun of Shamu Rocks, which we haven't even seen yet. (Patience.) Next up to mock is Pets Ahoy. Is Clyde tall enough to ride Manta?? Yay, he is! That doesn't necessarily mean he should, though. (Probably shouldn't have had all that fish before riding.) And now, the wonder of Blue Horizons. "Where anything you wish for, CAN BE...!" "A'Lure: The Call of the Ocean" is up next. Did I mention that they're making fun of their own shows?? And it's awesome? "Wal-rus! Wal-rus!" "And what do you want to be when you grow up, Timmy?" "A rapper." "Did you hear that, ladies and gentlemen? A whale trainer!" No, I don't think orcas can do sit-ups. They can totally kick a walrus's ass though, so I'd be careful. Sea Lions Tonight is now Misty's favorite show at SeaWorld. Actually, probably anywhere. A DJ doing his thing in Penguin Plaza. He played a really whacked- out version of Jessie's Girl that I enjoyed. Can't seem to track it down though. If you want to see the penguins, After Dark is not the time to do it. In fact, you really need to be there between about 9:30am and 3:00pm, this time of year. This is what it looks like if you open your shutter up a bit, though. And now, a quick night time tour of SWO's biggest rides, starting with Journey To Atlantis. Kraken. (Yes, there's a train in this photo. It's that blurry thing behind the rocks. Hey, it's dark out! Let's see you do better!) Manta, with the Sky Tower in the background. Hey, just think of the blurry photos we can get from up there! Manta, JTA, and Aquatica, among other things. Just take my word for it. Kraken, the Sea Lion stadium, and a really bright freaking light. Happy Harbor and Shamu Stadium, where we are headed next. Shamu Rocks. You like a hurricane. They don't use that song. But they should. "I like fish!!!" "Bitch, we all like fish!" Ladies and gentlemen, Yngwie Malmsteen. "Admiral, there be whales here!" Honestly, while it's certainly not a bad show, I don't think Shamu Rocks is as good as Believe. Then again, it may just be that this show suffers more from not having trainers in the water with the orcas. I don't know; I'd never seen Shamu Rocks before this summer. Oh, I don't know; It'll probably be really crowded. /end sarcasm Shamu's Happy Harbor tends to be pretty dead at night--especially if you go DURING a Shamu show. Smisty does her 'we've got the whole place to ourselves' dance. "This is lame. I want to ride Manta." (Don't sweat it, kid. One day you might like coasters so much that Shamu Express will be just as good.) A second DJ is set up at Wild Arctic. "Ah, I didn't see it because it's dark out! And now it's got my leg! Curse you brown night bear!" As I understand it, there used be a water ski show here. Now, the only thing it gets used for is special events and the summer fireworks show. A guy warms up the crowd. Maybe I'm just getting old, but he's no mime. Fountains and fireworks. Let's open up the shutter a bit. "Ah, I'm blind!" From the other side of the lake. Center-left is Bayside Stadium. Center-right is the Renaissance hotel across the street. The Waterfront area. SeaWorld After Dark.

How? Erik & Smisty, that's how. /Actually, I have no idea.

Okay, we've made you all wait long enough. It's time now for Clermont's other tourist attraction--an attraction which represents, in a very real sense, the reason that this thread exists in the first place. It is that epic. An attraction known as... The House of Presidents ...or, possibly... The Presidents Hall of Fame It's not really clear. Almost literally in the shadow of the Citrus Tower. No, really, it's world famous. We didn't know about it until we walked by, but still. I could stare at this all day. This "parade limo" was allegedly used by Presidents Nixon, Ford, and Carter. Actually, Mr. President, Mount Rushmore was in National Treasure *2*. So there. The Lincoln figure in the back is animatronic. Kind of. He moves around, and his lips move, but he doesn't actually say anything. I think it's an attempt at political humor. The clear-as-mud pricing list. You're given tokens, which you then take two feet from the desk and drop into the turnstile in order to gain entry. Hey, I'm all for showmanship. The first display once inside. If it seems a bit random, hold onto your hats. A model of the construction of the White House. I like the little black dude driving the carriage. Sure.... A photo of the guy who owns the place, along with his wife and President and Mrs. Ford. I'm not sure if this display shows some political bias, or if it was just put up before the election actually took place. I swear these photos are in order. The place is just like this. Come sit on an American flag and watch George W. Bush try to complete a sentence. It'll be fun. Note the restroom, back-left. John McCain is watching you defecate. This is just...wow. Okay. A "Believe It or Not!" display about the guy who owns the place. He apparently spent 20 years working on a highly-detailed model of the white house--which is not here. Smisty, presidential china displays, and faceless first ladies. Presidential Fact: Washington was so vain that he put his own face on the white house china. Fact. 43 presidents in wax. Also, Laura Bush (I guess). Black man gets a cardboard cut out. I like the weak attempt to tie Mark Twain into the place. And also the Green Lantern symbol. (Actually, that last one was my fault. But it's still cool.) Hillary Clinton's first foray into government work. An endless array of awesomeness. Presidential Fact: Though it was often hidden from the public is his day, Thomas Jefferson was an incredibly tiny man. Small enough, in fact, that he frequently sat on book shelves unnoticed. Fact. Recreations of each president's arrangement of the oval office. And also, a video of Reagan telling jokes. This photo is not actually blurry. It is just being distorted by the raw power of PRESIDENT GREEN LANTERN. The Presidential Bed--where all straight presidents up until Clinton were serviced by four presidential "hand maidens" who then got the F#$% out. The President and The King. And then some guy named King. Whatever. Well, I guess if Elvis and MLK can be in the Presidents Hall of Fame, so can H. Ross Perot. Yes, you can even have your fortune read by George W. Bush. FOR FREE!!! These cookies are old. I do not want old cookies. Well...maybe just one. "The Circus--True Americana!" Or, in other words: "Screw it, anything goes!" Sure, why not? This is, like, some kind of English birdhouse or something. But we've pretty much given up on the presidential thing at this point anyway, so who cares? We, of course, exit back into the gift shop. Note the woodcarver sign behind Misty. Ladies and gentlemen, the woodcarver. I have no explanation. Yes, it's a talking Woodrow Wilson action figure. And then some other stuff I can't even begin to make sense of. "Bob Dole is not happy about being here. Bob Dole would like to go home now and watch Matlock." ...and we're still paying for it! Ladies and gentlemen: President Al Jolson! "The World's Smallest Curiosities of Americana" is going to be the name of my next band. God, I freaking love this place!

Best.Name.Ever.

Yes. Well, I think so anyway. The lady who worked there said that it goes all the way to the basement, and you can hear it "hit bottom." But we never actually *saw* anything, and it could quite easily be a deception. Same. If I haven't mentioned it already, you two continue to rock. Robb and Elissa? Yes they do.

Of course we did! Stay tuned....

About 25 miles west of Orlando is the city of Clermont, which has exactly two tourist attractions. Here's the one you might have heard of. No, it doesn't look like citrus--and no, you can't see any citrus from it. For that matter, you can't even buy any there. Nevertheless, it is...The Citrus Tower! The tower is 226-feet tall, but honestly doesn't seem all that big in person. This photo becomes much funnier once you know that the tower entrance is to the right. The Citrus Tower was built in 1956 to give visitors a panoramic view of the area's copious orange groves (which no longer exist). "...that you are not invited to." High quality models on display on the ground level. To get to the top, you enter and exit through the gift shop. Here's a look inside the gift shop, which features standard gift shop crap. Hours and prices, for those who care about such things. Smisty, waiting for the elevator. The inside of the elevator door is chock-full of useful Citrus Tower information. The observation deck. You can stay as long as you like. However, there is no air conditioning up here. And it's glass-enclosed. And did I mention, Florida? "Cypress Gardens"? The city of Clermont, in all its glory. Orange trees, as far as the eye can see! (Really, a better name would be "The Scurvy Tower.") The coolest, goofiest thing here. Drop a coin all the way down the tower. Or so we claim. No, you can't see it. But you can listen to it! Ooh, there's a Friendly's! I push the button. And back down to the gift shop. The Citrus Tower isn't bad, just kind of pointless. And also, it robbed me of my ability to write funny captions. Curse you, Florida Citrus Tower!

An interesting question, and one I've given some thought to in the past. Are we assuming that you'll only go to "local" parks, or are short trips a possibility also? Keep in mind that both Central Florida and Southern California are fairly isolated from most other areas. On the other hand, when I lived in Pigeon Forge, not only did I have Dollywood in my backyard (which operates about 9 months out of the year), I also had a whole range of good seasonal parks within a day's drive: Busch Gardens Williamsburg, King's Dominion, King's Island, Holiday World, Lake Winnie, Six Flags Over Georgia, Carowinds, Beech Bend, Kentucky Kingdom--even Cedar Point if I really pushed it. From Central Florida you might make it up to SFOG--but that's about it, realistically. Southern California is perhaps a bit better, with some parks to the North and Las Vegas to the East. But still, how good are Southern California's actual parks these days, anyway? Speaking of which, what kind of parks do you like? If you're more of a traditionalist, Central Florida may not be your best choice, dominated as it is by high-tech family rides and theming. Is the actual area (you know, like, nature) important? Personally, I can't imagine ever moving back to Southern California (where I'm originally from), because I dislike concrete and the color gray. On the other hand, someplace like Eastern Pennsylvania might be loaded up with great parks within close driving range, but can you handle only having access to them for half the year (and being a Popsicle the other half)? There's more to life than parks, you know. But, for the record, I live in Orlando.

Wow, lots of love for T-Rex! I think I meant all the different animals, as opposed to just dinosaurs. Oh, and good to know there's another T-Rex Cafe. Thanks, dandaman!

The T-Rex Cafe at Downtown Disney is a dinosaur-themed spin-off of The Rainforest Cafe. To say that the two are similar is, I think, an understatement. Essentially, they are the same--just with a slightly different menu, dinosaurs instead of jungle animals, and an extinction level event occurring every fifteen minutes instead of a thunderstorm. They're both fun, overpriced experiences--but you could probably get away with just doing one. Which one? Well, Misty slightly prefers T-Rex for the food selection, whereas I slightly prefer Rainforest due to the more varied decor. Or, you could choose this way: There are Rainforest Cafes all over the world, but, so far as I know, there's only one T-Rex Cafe. A rare shot of the T-Rex Cafe not swarmed with people. Must have just opened for the day. The bar area. Like at Rainforest, there are various differently themed seating areas. I'm not sure what this face means. "Yay, I'm at T-Rex Cafe"? Or perhaps, "Hurry up, I'm hungry!" Misty got whatever kind of wussy stuff this is. While I choose the manliest meal possible. Of course, we also had to have dessert. This is called "Ice Age Indulgence." Smisty went with "Meteor Bites" (which I'm pretty sure is the real reason she prefers T-Rex to Rainforest). Time to go exploring. Here's the ice age room. THE KITCHEN OF FIRE!!! Didn't see any actual cooking being done there, though. Yay, the bathroom! Can you guess what the ladies' is called?? There is, of course, a gift shop. Build-a-dino, split a geode, that kind of thing. This photo is basically just here for the "glad you saurus" sign. Attached to the gift shop, but slightly outside, is this archeological dig play area thingy. The T-Rex Cafe, at Downtown Disney. An awesome place to eat--if you're a little kid with a lot of money.

I like SeaWorld San Antonio, but its animal exhibits are a bit weak when compared to, say, SeaWorld Orlando's. All of SWSA's dolphins reside in what is basically the equivalent of SWO's dolphin nursery area!

I haven't seen a lot of detailed PTRs from this park. Thanks! Some really nice photos in there. I especially like this one:

Never seen it. But obviously, it must be comedic genius.

The Bird Gardens area of Busch Gardens Tampa has undergone quite a transformation over the last year or two. Paths have been moved, a new show added, the Hospitality House changed its primary function, Land of the Dragons was revamped and expanded into Sesame Street Safari of Fun, and most recently, a whole section of it was Australian-ized into Walkabout Way. Not traditionally the most exciting area of BGT, but it's getting better. The Garden Gate Cafe They still serve beer...it's just no longer free. But we were here for pizza. (Protip: the pizza is slightly better at Crown Colony Pizza, which is also a nicer restaurant than this one, for the same price.) The Garden Gate store sells garden stuff, much like the one at BGW. Misty pretends to drive a remote control boat (since we would never actually waste money on such nonsense). Note the entrance to the Bird Gardens Theater in the background, as that's where we're headed next.) Yes, the Bird Gardens Theater, home to the new Critter Castaways show. Ever seen Pets Ahoy at SeaWorld? While watching it, did you think, "this needs more humans, and they should sing"? You did? Awesome, then you'll love this! This cat tried to get away, but was caught by its evil captor and sent scurrying back. The lesser anteater seems content enough, despite being saddled with the designation "lesser." While the humans are all backstage for a moment, the kangaroo stages a desperate plea to the audience. Having failed to secure help from the audience, the animals at last turn to explosives. A dark ending, but a fair one. After the show, there's a meet and great with the animals. This human character is supposed to be annoying. Note to show producers: Characters who are supposed to be annoying are not actually funny, they are instead (shockingly enough) annoying. Thank you. After the hell that was Critter Castaways, I wanted to get as far away as possible, so we headed to Australia. Wow...this is how people in Australia live?? No wonder they produced Hitler! This employee asked us if we were teachers. (I guess because we were both wearing shirts from Indiana parks and were taking pictures of this educational crap.) Misty responded, "No, we're just nerds." This is pretty. Why would Hitler want to leave this? There are two animal exhibits in Walkabout Way. Can you guess what animal this one features? Please read this sign in its entirety. It is now my favorite sign ever. Kudos to BGT for having a sense of humor. Kangaroos! The kangaroo exhibit is nice enough, if a bit sparse, foliage-wise. I blame Australia really. Not all the kangaroos survived the arduous journey. But hey, BGT paid for 'em, so here ya go. I'm not sure if the building on the right used to be an eatery or not, or if it ever will be. But it sure looks like one. The second animal exhibit is an aviary. Let's review the use of quotation marks, shall we? Putting them around a single word indicates suspicion or irony. For example, if you say that you are "world" famous, you mean that no one outside of your immediate family has ever heard of you. Which, as a citizen, I would forgive you for not quite understanding. However, I do expect a large corporate park--which employs proofreaders and other learned people--to at least have a rough grasp of this concept. And therefore I assume that BGT is purposely saying, "We know you stupid fudgers aren't actually going to stay on the walks, but we're putting this sign up anyway." Because that makes me feel better about it. And now, baby ducks. Leaving Walkabout Way (which needs a bit more, by the way--if not koalas, then at least some venomous snakes or something), we encounter this blast from the past. It's a nice touch that it's still here. Flamingos! And some kind of big white bird! Possible a goose! Every zoo in the world has these things. And now, so does Busch Gardens Tampa. Ducks and turtles. In case you were unaware of what these strange creatures are. Did you know that the plural form of topiary is topiaries? Well, why doesn't my spell check? Safari of Fun, like Land of the Dragons before it, is sort of an annex accessible only from inside the Bird Gardens area of the park. "A is for Africa." That's the name of the show. Air Grover welcomes you! (You dirty, dirty credit whore.) The drop and first helix. The second helix and brake run. (This photo also shows off the ride's somewhat-controversial desert theming.) I can't believe I just gave a play-by-play description of a kiddie coaster. Cookie Monster gets his own store. As is only appropriate. Sometimes my camera goes insane. Equally odd, Breakfast with Elmo & Friends, rather than taking place in an actual restaurant, appears to happen in this tent--which then sits empty for the rest of the day. Bert & Ernie's water play area. (I spent like 10 minutes trying to come up with a gay joke here, but then I gave up.) Yes, they have one of those "only kids who really shouldn't be riding anything by themselves can ride it" flumes. Really, except for Air Grover, there's not much here for adults. Although, they look like they're having lots of fun. Adults must be accompanied by a child. I feel I should say, my complaints are purely selfish. BGT never intended or advertised this area as anything more than a kiddie land. I just think that's pointlessly limiting. Gimme Camp Jurassic or If I Ran The Zoo at IOA any day. You can stand in the midway, though. There is lots of stuff to do if you're a kid, though. Which I guess is the point. This car ride is themed to The Count. Duh. Three monkeys. Three, ah-ah-ah-ah! Okay, so they're hiding in the bushes. Gay joke now? Nicely themed snack shop and restrooms. Safari of Fun's main gift shop. Where you can buy plush and slushies. "Wait, plush or slushies?" They misspelled "baby." This is cool, though. Instead of buying a physical video, it comes on a souvenir flash drive. And now, back to our regularly scheduled Bird Gardens. Now, the last time I checked, the Komodo Dragon was not considered a bird. This guy's a bird, though. The big aviary between Safari of Fun and Stanleyville. Usually, employees hide when I start taking photos. "I'm a parrot. You wanna fight??" Also, poop. I don't think I'd ever actually been in this aviary before. It's pretty cool. This shot kind of shows how the paths around the aviary head up (in order to cross a bridge over the train tracks). A few more birds are kind of off in their own little ghetto area, as seen from the bridge. From the other side of the bridge, you can see this full-sized anteater. (Or, as I like to call it, "greater anteater.") Well, that's our Bird Gardens update. What did you think? Oh.

Weren't there some MagiQuest rumors attached to this? I guess they were, in fact, just rumors. Seems like a natural fit, though. My thoughts: The area looks much better in person than it does in the photos I've seen. Unicorn's theming has been improved, Dragons' theming has been improved in some ways but weakened in others. Butterbeer is actually pretty tasty (and not really that expensive, if you don't get it in the souvenir cup). They've crammed a lot into a relatively small space, but the stores are way too small (especially considering how much real estate was spent on the Owl Post--which is, ultimately, just a bunch of benches). Lots of cool animatroinic details in the fake shop windows (but will they still work in a year?) The border between WWOHP and JP is awful, with lots of visual spillover between the two. And (*drumroll please*) I am too fat for the new ride! (For the record, I've never not been able to ride any coaster or other adult ride due to my mild fatness problem. Therefore, I predict lots and lots of guest service issues for the park on this one.)

Sure, why not? Doesn't take much to enter.

I always feel so contrarian around here...but I'm still worried about the new trains (especially the 'crotch horn'). Who knows? Maybe this delay will give some people one last chance to ride The Voyage during what will be looked back on as its golden age.

Two reverse-banked hills would be awesome, as you'd get airtime while doing the "high five." The drawing doesn't entirely suggest that, though.

The water will be warm, but not unpleasantly so. What will be unpleasantly hot, though, is the ground. So don't just throw your shoes in a locker and go tearing off. It's a nice park. Smallish, but well laid out and very pretty.

Well, I'm not a CP fanboy, but I think the phrase you were looking for there was "slightly edges out." Thanks for the TR!

For best "themed" US park outside of Florida or California, I'd go with Busch Gardens Williamsburg. But even it is not really what you're asking for, sorry.

I'm sure Dan is a great guy, and I wish Holiday World only the best. I love the park, and I especially love the way it's run. The idea that he'll be running it from Florida is the primary reason for my cynicism. But it is, of course, ultimately, none of my business anyway. Truly sad about Will. He will be missed--even by those of us who only met him once or twice.