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Everything posted by Nemmy

  1. Nemmy


    I really love seeing my threads bumped. It makes me feel important.
  2. I blew through Rated R. Now Chcolate Cross-Ant has been overused. It's time for my new title: M-Oral Violations P.S. When I get sick of it, my next one will be "Take Off Your Pants And Jacket", a popular Blink 182 album. Do you get the joke?
  3. I suppose that this is the precurson to the "Google Grid" (watch EPIC 2015).
  4. I JUST got my internet back. Here is a diary I took while at my cousin Zach's house. My apartment's windows blew in, and it is uninhabitable. 8:00 A.M. – I woke up 8:17 - the power goes out 8:21 – Zach’s screen patio completely blows down 8:24 – I look through the safe window, the one that’s in the opposite direction of the wind right now, and a huge tree came down 8:29 – the attic door actually shifted inside the attic 8:33 – the patio fan starts to revolve…A LOT 8:36 – the eye wall comes? 8:50 – radio says that Boca is getting the “smack-dab middle” of Wilma 8:58 – part of the patio is banging on a window, I go out in the middle of the eye wall to remove it 9:28 – The eye starts to come in; it gets lighter 9:53 – Where the hell is the eye? It’s calm outside but not sunny at all, and it’s still raining. 10:26 – The entire neighborhood has met outside. Apparently, everyone’s patio has fallen in. Ouch. 10:39 – The winds start to pick up again 11:07 – The last part of patio came down, and I got it on film 11:37 – Winds are dying down
  5. What's the saddest thing to do? Strap a bomb under someone's wheelchair and shout "Run!" How do you kill a retard? Strap a knife to his hand and ask him who's special.
  6. Tech Support: Host: Hello? Caller: It says "Click Here To Finish". What do I do now? Host: Hello? Caller: Is this Mike? Host: Huh? This is Carmen Electra Fan Club tech support! Caller: What? This isn't Mike's house? Host: Please hang up, I'm trying to enjoy myself right now. And how did you confuse a 561 area code with 1-800-HOT-GIRL?
  7. And so ends the tragic tale of the man with enough balls to perform Village People songs with lots of chicks... Jeff "Maybe he was a hermaphrodite" Arons
  8. You mean to tell me that you, without any dental training, are using orthodontic tools to attach brackets and wires to your teeth that will straighten them? I am shocked! Jeff "I love finding literal meaning for things" Arons
  9. The Greatest Game Ever Played...sucked major softballs. I only went to see it because...wait, I didn't even go to see it. I got a torrent of it to save the $8 for the ticket, plus popcorn and soda.
  10. I sure do love craving pumpkins, just like I do crack.
  11. Wow. I guess Israel really IS dangerous, huh? How to flush a toilet in Israel. 1. Push the button with 300 pounds of strength...
  12. A man walks into a bar with a chunk of asphalt tucked under his left arm. He says, "Bartender, I'd like a root beer for me and one for the road." Baroom ching. Two men walk into a bar. One of them ducks.
  13. LOL @ your last one. A boy from Boston was beat by his parents. The authorities were going to send him to another family member, but the boy said that they all beat him. He was eventually sent to be taken care of by the New York Yankees, because the boy said they couldn't beat anyone. A man goes to a doctor. He says, "Doctor, I have this problem with nosebleeds." The doctor says, "Try cutting your fingernails shorter, son."
  14. So, my math teacher. He assigns us homework on adding and subtracting fractions on Friday…and we have a hurricane coming! So, I did the homework in class. The math teacher tells us, “I will take no excuses. You need to have this done.” Well, I walked home that day and kept the homework in my binder, in my backpack. Wilma hits. We’re huddling in the interior closet. We hear a tree fall on the house. My mother goes out. She says it hit my room. I say, “I gotta get my math homework!” I run in there while the storm ravages. I start unzipping my backpack. I don’t care about the other contents of my backpack or binder. Just my math homework. As I reach in to get my binder, a cinderblock falls through the roof. It cuts off my arm. My pitching arm. I send my brother in to get it. He is no longer with us. My father goes in to rescue my math homework. He comes back with my backpack. I yell at him, “What are you doing? I said just my math homework!” I grab the backpack and throw it into the cracked window. It shatters completely. It gets really loud all of a sudden. The wind rages up, blowing debris inside the house. A 2x4 hits my father in the head. He falls down, unconscious. My mother tries to rescue him and gets blown through the sliding glass door. No one came to remove the dead bodies. The house is starting to smell really bad. I had to hitchhike to school today. I was mugged four times on the way, three times by old people. I tell this story to my math teacher. Then I say, “May I be excused from homework?” “Yeah, let me contemplate that…NO.”
  15. I could understand Ridder and Tatsu, because they're both huge-ass coasters. But classic Revolution dueling with Tatsu...weird...
  16. your just stupid... jk, those markers are for Tatsu! but seriously, do people just read the title and immediatly post 'I THINK _____ IS BETTER CUZ this, and this, and this!? READ THE FIRST POST! anyhoo, It seems that these two parks, for one reason or another, have stopped their coaster wars. Both of these parks havn't put in a new ride in awhile. I'm, just wondering how high the count can get, i see places for rollercoasters at SFMM, but not so much at CP, i wonder when were finally going to have to rip out something big to put somthing else in, one thing is for sure, were only a few coasters away. Yeah, but that'd be kind of weird to have Tatsu interwining with Revolution...
  17. Um, yeah, they have construction markers and footers around Revolution, so that gives me reason to believe that a demolition might be on the way. But maybe I'm stupid.
  18. Oh, Soren gets in and I don't? Waaah! I'm telling my mommy on you! s
  19. What happens if somehow, the hurricanes go past Omega? Do they start using Morse Code or the Hebrew alphabet?
  20. Yep. Screw karma, I'm out of here, if I can even get a flight. I was supposed to be going to Vegas, anyway, for a poker tournament, but a miscommunication of information had me miss it. Oh well.
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