ILoveRides

Here's EPISODE 2 of Gertrude's 100% Official Bay Area Bash Adventure!!! Special thanks to everyone at The Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk for the awesome ERT, open bar, and tasty dinner (with lots of vegetarian options! - Bonus points for that). CONTENT WARNING: If you are easily offended or aren't old enough to view "adult" topics... please stop reading now! TPR members suggested some racy topics for this story . After a nice long bus ride, the party bus pulled up to the much-anticipated bonus park: The Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk TPR had a private beach deck. Gertrude and Beth played beach volleyball with some other TPR members until it was time for ERT. After volleyball, it was time for ERT on The Giant Dipper! Gertrude and Beth rode The Giant Dipper a bunch of times with no wait! Gertrude thinks to have lasted so long, the giant dipper must be really strong and manly like her! After ERT, everyone hung out on the beach deck. Gertrude started drinking at the open bar. She clearly didn't know when to stop drinking. Some people worked on their photo bingo cards. Check out the coolest square ever that we found on fatdaddy's card. But Gertrude just kept drinking and drinking. Here are Gertrude and Beth partying with a bunch of other TPR members. As the night wore on, Gertrude started feeling really drunk, and she stumbled away from the party. In a drunken stupor, Gertrude wandered to a seedy part of town where she happened upon "Kuntz Books," owned and managed by the famous baseball player Rusty Kuntz. She decided to look inside. Once inside, Gertrude was deeply disturbed by one of the customers who enjoyed hitting flying semen with a tennis racket. She was disgusted, and swore to never go to an adult bookstore again. (The customer, Robb Alvey, was later arrested by police for trying to steal a copy of "Six Fags Magic Mount Him" to add to his large gay porn collection) Gertrude left Kuntz Books, and luckily managed to find her way back to the party bus. By this time she was so drunk that she was mumbling incoherent sentences, and trying to start fights with anyone who would come near her. (PS - "I have a life. Do you?" is the winning Friday trip report quote chosen by someone on the party bus!) The world was a blur to Gertrude as the party bus drove to the hotel. After the bus ride, she just barely managed to walk to her room before passing out. Hopefully she sleeps well, because there's still tons more to come in Episode 3 of Gertrude's 100% Official Bay Area Bash Adventure! Check back to see what happens!

Sorry about the HUGE delay posting the Bay Area Bash trip reports!!! I've been crazy busy with all sorts of things (and unfortunately school has to take top priority). But don't fear... more Gertrude insanity will be coming soon! Very soon! And it will be amazing! In the meantime, here's a Bay Area Bash stop motion movie I made: [coastertube]http://www.themeparkreview.com/coastertube/play.php?vid=bayAreaBash2010_aims[/coastertube] And if you're a clubTPR member, go complete my "games and puzzles" section in the magazine! More updates coming soon, and sorry again for the delay!!! Gertrude loves you!

Did they close down the rides on Paradise Pier as it had been reported they would? If so, what time did they close them? And did any re-open - or were they closed for the night? Also, did anyone check out glowfest? How was that? I'm going tomorrow for World of Color! *excited*

That's such a neat event they put on! I'm glad I got to see it through your pictures.

I love your TRs! You always have unique photos and the captions are hilarious! Keep it up!

Please re-upload the video, I missed it! Please, please, pretty please?

Will do! No worries! And guess what? We made a fun book and button bag for you and Lady Bebe and Justin too! If you want them now, you can PM me your address, otherwise we'll just give them to you the next time we see you at an event. It's a little late to participate with the fun book... but the buttons are still sweet! _________________________________________ AND NOW... thanks to participation from tons of TPR members, here's EPISODE 1 of Gertrude's 100% Official Bay Area Bash Adventure!!! ... 4 MONTHS BEFORE BAY AREA BASH: Our story begins with Beth, the lesser known and lesser loved half of Gertrude and Beth. Jealous of Gertrude's fame on TPR, Beth decided she was going to go to Bay Area Bash on her own and keep it a secret from Gertrude. Here she is collecting change from the fountains and water rides around Magic Mountain to save up enough money for a party bus ticket. FAST FORWARD TO THE PARTY BUS DEPARTURE DAY: Beth and Gertrude talk outside Magic Mountain. Beth then made an excuse so that she could sneak away for the weekend to get on the party bus. Instead of going to goose bed like she said, Beth snuck out to the party bus departure spot. Little did Beth know, Gertrude wasn't going to give up on the party bus that easily. Gertrude had devised a plan to sneak onto the party bus without a ticket! She called her friend Towelie to help her get to the departure spot. Towelie pulled up in his AMC Pacer, ready to help Gertrude get to the Party Bus. Towelie raced through traffic to get Gertrude there in time. Meanwhile, Gertrude found all sorts of pills and needles in the passenger seat of Towelie's car that she began experimenting with. Towelie pulled up to the departure point only to find that the bus had already left! He quickly raced onto the 5 freeway to catch it! Meanwhile, Gertrude began growing muscles from all the pills and needles. She was getting WAY more manly than usual. Towelie caught up to the bus and told Gertrude to jump. Gertrude jumped, barely squeezing her huge muscles through an open window on the bus. Fortunately, the TPR members were busy snacking, and didn't think twice about a talking goose jumping into the bus. The TPR members may not have cared about Gertrude, but when Beth noticed Gertrude she nearly shat herself. Beth quickly threw on a disguise. Gertrude and Beth were now both on their way to Bay Area Bash on the party bus! But to what bonus park are they headed, and what craziness will happen next??? Check back when episode 2 is posted to find out!

Awesome trip report! I'm looking forward to more crummy pictures and bad captions! BTW I think you captured the best manly pose picture we've ever taken. And yes, we were sober. Completely sober.

Hilarious!

The Party Bus and Bay Area Bash rocked!!! It was such an amazing weekend... thanks to everyone who helped put it together! It's going to take a few days to create the trip reports (Spoiler: Gertrude made it to Bay Area Bash!!!), but in the meantime here is what Hilary and I did for those who were on the party bus... We surprised everybody on the party bus with a "Party Bus Fun Book" filled with games and some chances to participate in the Bay Area Bash trip reports. We also made "Gertrude Approved" and "100% Official Manly Pose" buttons for everyone on the bus. The results of the participation parts are below. Thanks to everyone on the bus who participated! NOTE: Some people may consider some of these responses inappropriate. Please don't read on if you're offended easily. 1. Choose Beth's Disguise: The options were: fro, clown nose, long hair, sneakers, glasses, moustache, shirt, and pipe. Two people also added their own options, which were: "Gold watch on a chain", and "pipe in the ass" The number of votes each option got: Fro: 6 Clown nose: 2 Long hair: 4 Sneakers: 4 Glasses: 3 Moustache: 7 Shirt: 3 Pipe: 6 Gold watch on a chain: 1 Pipe in the ass: 1 The top 2 options were supposed to win, but there was a tie for 2nd place... so we took the top 3. FINAL RESULT: Beth will disguise herself with a fro, moustache, and pipe. 2. The last thing Gertrude says in the Friday trip report: We drew the winning quote at random from the responses we got. We decided to save the winning quote as a surprise, but here are all the responses we got that didn't get chosen (some may still show up in the trip report): "You're cut off!" "Stiff wood plus open bar - epic win" "The Giant Dipper is as much fun as Bette White" "Then she called me a lap dog and I don't even know what that is" "It's not a party until someone sticks their dick in the mashed potatoes" "People are like M&M's... They come in a bunch of different colors but they all taste the same when you bite into them" "When there's a bonus... don't question!" "I like small boys in tights" "Now, how can I sneak into David's room to eat his puke" <<< NOT FUNNY! "I swear I was no where near that Tilt-a-whirl!" "Christ Jo, is that what you think it did?" "Father, Father - why have you forsaken me?" Check back when the Friday trip report gets posted to see the winning quote! 3. The last thing Gertrude says in the Saturday trip report: Again, we saved the winning quote as a surprise, but here are all the responses we got that didn't get chosen (some may still show up in the trip report): "I regret to inform you that the fetus survived" "Debris, Dusty we got debris!" "That's how TPR rolls" "Remember fellow TPRers, Bay Area Bash is better than sex" "They wouldn't let me on Demon because they said I was 'too short.' We all know it is because I'm black... well half... I'm like Barack Obama" "Took a side trip to the Oakland Zoo. They had a tiger roller coaster that actually had an Ass-end! An Ass!!" "My stomach hurts!" "I like small naked boys" "Bitches Please!" "With great moustache comes great responsibility" Check back when the Saturday trip report gets posted to see the winning quote! 4. The last thing Gertrude says in the Sunday trip report: Here are all the responses we got that didn't get chosen (some may still show up in the trip report): "I had a great time at Bay Area Bash but there are too many gay geese in San Francisco!" "Stay in drugs, don't do school, and always, ALWAYS! listen to your grandparents." "The Holocaust was not as fun as it looked" "Free Willie? I got 9mm's of freedom for him right here" "Me no want to go home, me love theme park trips" "I like little Hitler babies" "I want my - I want my - I want my 'Bag of Crap'!" "Be back next year with manly poses" "Crushing isn't hot until you've seen a goose do it" "LEROY JENKINS!!!!" "Food, fffood, food, food, food!" Check back when the Sunday trip report gets posted to see the winning quote! That's it for now. See you in a few days with photo proof that Bay Area Bash was all that and a bag of chips!!! PS - If you weren't on the party bus but still want a button, don't worry - we have extras and there will be more chances to get one in the future! The designs for the buttons we gave out on the party bus! The first 4 pages of the fun book! A sample of some of the fun stuff that was included.

Yay! All the questions are complete! Thanks to everyone who participated. Here are the all the questions and answers from part 2: 1. Q: What is Gertrude's catch phrase in the trip report? (must be original - not an existing catch phrase) A: The phrase is "I am made of tasty cheese. And fire." 2. Q: What does Gertrude wear during at least some of the trip report? A: Gertrude will wear a tutu. 3. Q: Is Beth in the trip report? If so, what's her role? If not, why isn't she in the trip report? (Beth is Gertrude's goose friend - if you didn't know) A: Yes, Beth got tickets by collecting change from a fountain. She planned to keep it a secret and ditch Gertrude. After seeing Gertrude on the bus she must quickly disguise herself. 4. Q: Is Robb in the trip report? If so, what's his role? If not, why isn't he in the trip report? A: Yes. Robb is in the trip report. He is the guy who Gertrude meets in an adult book store who enjoys hitting flying semen with a tennis racket. He doesn't actually have a role other than to deepy disturb Gertrude into never going into another adult book store again. 5. Q: Multiple choice: How manly is Gertrude during this trip report? a. Very manly (more than normal) b. Not at all manly (she loses her manly powers) A: a. Gertrude is WAY more manly than usual. 6. Q: Yes or No - Does Gertrude's plan to sneak on the party bus succeed? A: Yes. Once the party bus starts serving food, a nuclear holocaust could start and no one on board would notice. Thus, Gertrude could sneak on the party bus. 7. Q: Yes or No - Should I include Rusty Kuntz in the trip report, even though he didn't win in part 1? A: Rusty Cuntz is the manager of said bookstore. The name of the bookstore is Cuntz Books. Meaning Rusty Kuntz should be in the TR! 8. Q: What is Gertrude's favorite ride from the Bay Area Bash parks? A: Bertie the Bus in Thomas Town at SFDK. But she's so disappointed that the name is only one letter off from her's, so she turns Bertie the Bus into Gertie the Bus. 9. Q: What kind of car/bus/train/plane/etc. does Towelie (the winner from part 1) drive? A: AMC Pacer 10. Q: Does Gertrude get Beth a souvenir from Bay Area Bash? If so, what does she get Beth? If not, why doesn't she get Beth anything? A: No, because she forgot to bring her Goose change.

Did anyone go to the private party? I'm curious how empty the park was.

Yes. Robb is in the trip report. He is the guy who Gertrude meets in an adult book store who enjoys hitting flying semen with a tennis racket. He doesn't actually have a role other than to deepy disturb Gertrude into never going into another adult book store again. Lol, excellent.

Ah, you answered them all larrygator! You were only supposed to answer 1 hehe. Which one should I count as your 1?

We have a winner! The Mega Ball was #40... which means Gertrude's partner in crime will be... drum roll.... Towelie!!!!! Thanks to everyone who participated! All of the suggestions were really great... but only 1 could win... so look for Towelie in Gertrude's 100% Official Bay Area Bash Adventure! Moving along, here's part 2!... Part 2: 10 Questions! Below are 10 questions about things that will happen in the trip report - and the answers are totally up to you! After a question is answered, I will mark it as "taken". So it's first-come-first-served... Pick your favorite unanswered question and answer it! Please only answer 1 question per person, since there are only 10. Also, please be sure to note which number question you're answering in your post. Have fun! (TAKEN) 1. What is Gertrude's catch phrase in the trip report? (must be original - not an existing catch phrase) (TAKEN) 2. What does Gertrude wear during at least some of the trip report? (TAKEN) 3. Is Beth in the trip report? If so, what's her role? If not, why isn't she in the trip report? (Beth is Gertrude's goose friend - if you didn't know) (TAKEN) 4. Is Robb in the trip report? If so, what's his role? If not, why isn't he in the trip report? (TAKEN) 5. Multiple choice: How manly is Gertrude during this trip report? a. Very manly (more than normal) b. Not at all manly (she loses her manly powers) (TAKEN) 6. Yes or No - Does Gertrude's plan to sneak on the party bus succeed? (TAKEN) 7. Yes or No - Should I include Rusty Kuntz in the trip report, even though he didn't win in part 1? (TAKEN) 8. What is Gertrude's favorite ride from the Bay Area Bash parks? (TAKEN) 9. What kind of car/bus/train/plane/etc. does Towelie (the winner from part 1) drive? (TAKEN) 10. Does Gertrude get Beth a souvenir from Bay Area Bash? If so, what does she get Beth? If not, why doesn't she get Beth anything? The answers are up to you!

Awesome trip report!!! Ever since Robb posted a trip report from this fair awhile back (I'm pretty sure it was Robb who posted it), I've wanted to go. The rides where you can stand just look insane, and that kid's ride with the witch - wtf!? Thanks so much for posting another look at this really unique place.

AWESOME! The list is complete. Thanks to everyone who participated... I can't wait to see who will be chosen! Check back on Friday night for the final result, and to see part 2! Here's the final list: 1. Ice Bat 2. Kristen 3. Rosie O'Donnell 4. Chuck Norris 5. Tim Tebow 6. Keanu Reeves 7. Anthony "Goose" Edwards 8. Goose Gossage! 9. Lady Gaga 10. Stephen Colbert 11. Sam Cassel 12. Handy Manny 13. Shiriki Utundu!!! 14. An Intamin Cable 15. Gary Sinise 16. Donkey Kong! The original arcade/NES pixel version NOT the 3D rendered "Donkey Kong Country" version. 17. The TPR Donkey! 18. Mothera 19. Ronnie James Dio! 20. Manute Bol. 21. Huey Lewis 22. Barry Bonds' Head 23. Fabio 24. Shouka 25. Barrack Obama 26. The Tijuana Toads (Toro and Pancho - or like we call them Sancho and Pancho) 27. Tilly 28. 12oz. mouse 29. Muhammad 30. Family Guy Pope! 31. Leslie Hall 32. Bing Crosby 33. Edward D. Wood, Jr. 34. Quay Lewd (aka Fee Waybill of the Tubes) 35. Lurch 36. The Aflac Duck 37. Mega Piranha!!!!! 38. Mr. Bitey 39, Wolfgang, The Clinically Depressed Gator 40. Towelie 41. Fatty Patch Robb 42. The artist formerly known as Prince 43. Kermit 44. Jesus 45. Rusty Kuntz 46. The Title Fairy NOTE: THIS LIST IS COMPLETED! Check back on Friday night for part 2, with more chances to participate!

^^ Hilarious! Only 1 more open spot... who is it gonna be!?

Great suggestions everyone! (and a few I've never heard of - so I'll have to do some Googling if one of those gets picked). Here's the current list (I had modify some of the numbers to insert a post that got skipped): 1. Ice Bat 2. Kristen 3. Rosie O'Donnell 4. Chuck Norris 5. Tim Tebow 6. Keanu Reeves 7. Anthony "Goose" Edwards 8. Goose Gossage! 9. Lady Gaga 10. Stephen Colbert 11. Sam Cassel 12. Handy Manny 13. Shiriki Utundu!!! 14. An Intamin Cable 15. Gary Sinise 16. Donkey Kong! The original arcade/NES pixel version NOT the 3D rendered "Donkey Kong Country" version. 17. The TPR Donkey! 18. Mothera 19. Ronnie James Dio! 20. Manute Bol. 21. Huey Lewis 22. Barry Bonds' Head 23. Fabio 24. Shouka 25. Barrack Obama 26. The Tijuana Toads (Toro and Pancho - or like we call them Sancho and Pancho) 27. Tilly 28. 12oz. mouse 29. Muhammad 30. Family Guy Pope! 31. Leslie Hall 32. Bing Crosby 33. Edward D. Wood, Jr. 34. Quay Lewd (aka Fee Waybill of the Tubes) 35. Lurch 36. The Aflac Duck 37. Mega Piranha!!!!! 38. Mr. Bitey 39, Wolfgang, The Clinically Depressed Gator 40. Towelie 41. Fatty Patch Robb Only 5 more spots left... WHAT ABOUT BETH!??! Nobody likes Beth?

Great suggestions! Here's the current list: 1. Ice Bat 2. Kristen 3. Rosie O'Donnell

Thanks for your suggestion! I should've mentioned in my original post... but please number your posts, and quote the list from the person before you! Here's the current list... 1. Ice Bat

Note: This thread assumes you know about Gertrude and the Manly Pose. If you don't know who Gertrude is, learn here (Gertrude is in parts 1 & 2): ILoveRides' West Coast Bash 2010 TR If you don't know what the Manly Pose is, learn here (read the comments too): ILoveRides' Adventure City TR _______________________________________________ Table of Contents: Part 1: Gertrude Needs Your Help! - Page 1 Part 1: Result Posted Page 5 Part 2: 10 Questions Page 5 Part 2: Results Posted Page 7 Part 3: Party Bus Fun Book Results Posted Page 7 EPISODE 1: Gertrude and Beth are on their way! Page 7 EPISODE 2: Gertrude and Beth enjoy the bonus park and open bar! Page 9 _______________________________________________ PART 1: Gertrude Needs Your Help! The Bay Area Bash Party Bus is leaving soon! This thread is where Hilary and I will post our trip report from the event. But more importantly... GERTRUDE NEEDS YOUR HELP GETTING ON THE PARTY BUS! She wants to go on the bus, but she can't buy tickets because she only carries GooseBucks (GooseBucks aren't valid in the human world). Plus, even if she carried U.S. currency, knowing Gertrude, she would wait too long to buy her ticket and the event would end up selling out before she paid. So instead, Gertrude has devised a plan to sneak onto the Party Bus! (Please note: Sneaking into any TPR event isn't allowed and will get you in serious trouble. This is purely a fictional story. Gertrude is a talking goose who rides roller coasters - so you should already know this is fake.) THIS IS WHERE YOU COME IN: Hilary and I have no idea how this trip report is going to end! TPR members on the forum (that's YOU!) and TPR members on The Party Bus (that may be you as well) will help finish the story by doing simple tasks. I will then make the story into a photo trip report and post it here. So for part 1 of the trip report… Gertrude needs a friend to help her get to the party bus departure spot. Do you have any ideas who could help her!?!? I was thinking "Cactus Steve" or "Porcupine Pete"… or how about "Robb Alvey?"… but maybe you know someone better? Post your suggestions in this thread. Once 46 different names get posted, I will cut off the list. To pick Gertrude's new partner in crime, I will use the Mega Number from Friday's (5/7/10) Mega Millions drawing. Whichever name matches with the Mega Number will be Gertrude's helper… and a new star in Gertrude's 100% Official Bay Area Bash Adventure! So… Who do you want to see help Gertrude get to the party bus departure spot? Post your suggestions! Gertrude needs YOU to help her get to Bay Area Bash!

Or just go to Parque Espana, which is all of the above: GCI.. err.. B&M quality, Disney style dark rides, quirky, and fun! Excellent TR wrebbit. I'm hoping to go to Hirakata Park on a return trip to Japan someday... it looks like a fun place.

That one I know - and no, there are no inflatable sharks involved. Ah, but inflatable sharks would be so much fun! I could just imagine 40 tourists swimming around the lagoon on inflatable sharks... that would be such a sight.

The Mega Millions jackpot is $224 million. If I win, I'm building a mega-millions-mega-lite and we can all have ERT. Kawasemi is the only mega-lite I've been on. I had huge expectations before riding it, but even so I would say it was way better than I was expecting. Mega-lites rock! Every park that can afford large coasters needs an Intamin Mega-Lite and at least one of: B&M inverted, B&M floorless, or B&M hyper. My vote for the first US park to get a mega-lite: Knott's. Preferably a custom layout like GeForce.