dandaman

Dear God... I know this happened when I was just starting out online, but how could I have MISSED that? That's all kinds of pathetic hilarity.

8/22/09: Partners, Polynesian and a "Parking Lot 101" And finally, a flamingo in a Mickey sombrero. I don't know why, either. Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oy Oy Oy! Cheese-on-a-stick < Mickey-on-a-stick ( Went on Dinosaur. Hammed it up. Life's good. (That's "unnamed friend" in the blue.) Rode once in front, twice in back. Still as great a ride as ever. "Eeeeeeexcellent." So we decided to go to Animal Kingdom on our park-hoppers after lunch. We were waiting for the AK bus when a guy apparently at the end of his vacation gives us SEVEN unused Fastpasses for Everest. After the car trouble, I think I believe in karma now. Or something. (Just realized now that they're actually for two days before, but the CM's must not have caught it either or didn't care.) Eh. S'decent. Found at the cafe bartop. Following our mini-crisis, we went to the Polynesian for some grub. Ohana's wasn't open yet (or it was a long wait, can't remember) so we went to Kona Cafe and had some pretty decent burgers. So the friend who very kindly drove me here for the day remembered she'd left her fog lights on from earlier. Sure enough we get back to the car and the battery's dead. On top of that, we tried to start it and the alarm wouldn't shut up. About 5 minutes of this went by before a Disney security car pulls up and the guy tries to jump the battery, but alas, not enough juice on the pack. So another 10 minutes of incessant wailing goes by (before you ask, there was no panic/reset button we could find) and another security guy comes up, stuffs a towel in the siren, and jumps the car for us. Needless to say it was one of those hilariously bad experiences you just have to shake your head at. (To the entire parking lot security detail... you guys ROCK!) Also, empty tram. Best ride in the park. Started to put up the castle lights the week I was there. Crane's pretty ugly against the castle but a necessary evil nonetheless. Fast Train is FAST Hooray for Big Titty Mama Railroad! [/subtle] Part II: Something Goes Wrong Life Cycle of a Disney Ride Part I: What Could Go Wrong? "Y'arr, appears t' be many a buccaneer havin' a battle out yonder! Set sail for Chicago!" I hope they get the point in the end. LOVE ME FOR MY WIT. Hi Wes 5 seconds later: "You maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! Damn you all to HELL!" Hidden Fact: It's written in Cast Member blood. We hit Jungle Cruise first. 'Cause we're smart. Five Dan Smith Fun Bucks to whoever knows what the preceding captions referenced. "HEY!" "Yatatata, yatatata..." "A-cause, a-nobody, a-loves, a-me..." "IIIIIIIIIII ain't got no-boooooo-dee..." Happened to be passing by as the trolley show was performing the Superbowl Shuffle. "...And we'll put gift shops all the way along that side. But there will always be some attraction-specific merchandise up for sale. Got that?" If this were California, the building at right would be fully obscured by a palm tree. Welcome back to the location where wish-like experiences come to fruition.

^We're all awesomely shameless?

Using the inverse of the moon having 1/6 the gravity of Earth, it would be 6 times the fun.

+++++++Manta. Thanks for reading, all!

Oh sweet zombie Jesus, now there's incentive to keep posting TR's!

My first thought when I read the article. Steeped tea, as it were.

This should be added to RAW 4 just to back up the whole "coaster porn" thing.

I'm a college student and my dorm has no pots and/or pans, therefore I readily accepted the challenge of not caring about posting in 10 other threads.

Part II: [insert witty title] So overall an awesome first visit to SeaWorld, and now that I've upgraded my ticket, I'll hopefully be going at least a few more times before the year is up. Thanks especially to Carlos for driving/recommending/putting up with me the whole day, to Joe the AWESOME Shamu Express ride op, and to all the wonderful and friendly park employees. 'Till next time! After a night ride on Manta, Carlos and I got some prime seats for their fireworks show, Reflections. I gotta say, I wasn't expecting much, but I suppose SeaWorld couldn't let me finish my visit without blowing me away one last time. Though this doesn't do it nearly enough justice, even the lighting on the splashdown effect was very well-coordinated with the train. Kraken + nighttime + front row + outer left - lines > doing Batman in the rear. (But ONLY by a very slight margin.) Placeholder pic for Clyde and Seamore's awesome parody of SeaWorld attractions. Highlights: Clyde yelling while riding Manta, the walrus doing sit-ups, and of course the awesome mime. Back at the park, I find myself surrounded by sea creatures. I look calm, nay happy, but my head is screaming "OH DEAR GOD I'M TRAPPED IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION!" Dan's Tip For Today: Try to refrain from looking directly into the hole when it goes down or you get extremely wet. Also, the preceding was not innuendous in any way whatsoever. Not pictured: M-C-A. Scared the crap outta me when I walked by. NOT a Dan-approved water feature! OM NOM NOM Carlos somehow turned his orange ball invisible. That or he got a hole-in-one, which would never happen. Except on those three other holes. "You little S.O.B. ball! Why you don't you just go HOME? That's your HOME! Are you too good for your HOME? ANSWER ME!" I see TPR's "Drink Around the World" has made its way back on property. UMMMMMMMM... This classical music-themed course is 100% Dan-approved. And the Lord Yensid saw the Tower, and it was GOOD. Around 4:00 we decided to make a quick trip over to Fantasia Rdens for some discounted mini-golf.

^ "Marriage. Amiright fellas?"

Can't say I blame you; CM's who have to deal with the public get my absolute respect and/or sympathy, let alone deal with the crazy crowd control involved with the shows.

The scariest part of that is using the "Bighead" cheat on Willem Dafoe!

Well, even though I haven't finished last weekend's report yet, I felt this was more important. So I had no idea I'd be going to SeaWorld until the night before, when Carlos ("Frade" on TPR) and I happen to run into each other at the campus pub. (By the way, going to the same school as another TPR member has to be one of the most awesome coincidences in history.) Anyway, one thing led to another, and the next day I find myself with three new credits and 90 new pictures. (The sad part is that's WITH whittling it down.) So, without further adieu, I present my usual visual/bandwidth onslaught. (Also, is this an acceptable amount of parentheses?) This one didn't even turn out, but I'm leaving it in here because I can. More later, including a bonus trip to both Fantasia and Olive Gardens. And now, I present to you an excessive and entirely unnecessary amount of flower shots. Roll the montage! A new innovation in transportation: whale-powered flight. They should advertise ponchos on the big movable screens 5 seconds before this happens just to be cruel. Believe = good. Clyde & Seamore's parody later that night = better. Who turned 40? Way better timed than Maverick's cannons and 10 times as cool. Using the French I've learned as a Canadian, I can conclude that the bottom text says, "Attention! Your porridge and Pert shampoo are vying for your votes!" Carlos kindly gives a tourist possible directions to the restroom. Colder than Canada and your ex-wife combined. Meet Joe. Joe recognized my TPR shirt from when he worked at HHN's Interstellar Terror last year and found pics of himself in subsequent TR's. Joe is, therefore, awesome. There. Enjoy your Shamu Express ELT. *Excessively Long Train So we went to Happy Harbor to try and get some good pics of Shamu Express feat. Joe, which for a guy with arthritis, can generally be described in hindsight as a "bad idea". Had I known I had to crawl through those damn tubes to get to the exit, I wouldn't have done it, but since I love you guys SO much... Is it a bug or a whale? SHRAK! "i now haz a fish" "i can haz fish?" I have no caption for this. Uh... puffins. That is all. "...And all the West Antarctic penguins, they sleep like THIS." Since I know you're dying without having a Manta fix in 30 seconds, here you go. MORE FLAGS MORE FUN OMG, "The Simpsons" was RIGHT! They've been plotting to overtake humanity all along! Can your water skis do THIS? (If they can, you're either this guy or under investigation by PETA.) "Take me with you!" "Little help?" "Snorky... talk... man!" Saw some shows after we got all our credits (minus the awesome Shamu Express feat. Joe the ride op). Blue Horizons was very well done, but as Carlos said as well, it seems like SeaWorld's following suit with a certain other park down the road with the whole "dreams/believe/wish" thing. Also, center stage looks vaguely like a Disk-O. "Well, 'KRAH-ken' is how it's pronounced in the original Scandinavian, and 'KRAK-ken' is closer to that." "Well, we ain't original Scandinavians, are we? It's KRAY-kin." "It's a mythological creature, I'll call it what I wants!" Not pictured: Peanutbutterfish. They put aquariums in the gift shop so people are interested in the novelty and care less about their wallet quickly losing weight. Journey to Atlantis is a perfect TPR ride, in that you think "WTF?" but it comes out as "This is awesome for reasons unexplained!" I must say, pretzel loop aside, it's more fun than intense. SKLOOSH! Hadn't even noticed the little rays between the cars until just now. Being on the front outer left my first time, this deviously close waterfall soaked my left knee and possibly my pants shortly thereafter. Ze goggles! Zey do NOZZING! Also the only station I personally have seen with dual loading platforms for one track. It struck me that, for once, you have a comparably intense ride which isn't hyped up as "evil" or "near-death"; rather, it's touted as a uniquely uplifting experience (which it totally is). Okay, so Manta has firmly taken up residence near the top of my coaster list. Everything about it is perfect: the queue is amazingly themed and entertaining, the ride would be incredible even without the water effects, and I fully approve of the film score choices. Let's start the TR by making you think your monitor is fogged up. Surely I'll win your undying adoration then.

Thanks for the replies, folks. Always appreciated. I should have the 8/22 photos up sometime next week. However, I might post pics from SeaWorld tomorrow; going for the first time with "Frade" who posted up there, who's also a Florida Tech student. Which is awesome.

Highlights: Amazing. That was, what, two weeks or three after the surgery? I think I stopped doing the saltwater rinse about at about 10 days and I was (surprisingly) fine. Glad to hear it went OK; we need you at the top of your game to post such wondrous items as this.

Part III: DHS incl. RnRC/ToT/TSM/ST/BLT/OMG/WTF/BBQ The preceding was brought to you by delicious and refreshing Bo. Finally, we see multiple Disney characters... ON A BOAT. Hopefully I'll have some time in the next few days to do the 8/22 installment. 'Till then, folks. Is this how Californians drive? This gentleman looks so classy I almost WANT to be glove-slapped by him. Two things to note (aside from the obvious Halloween 1939 reference): A) The Twilight Zone premiered on 10/2/59. B) In the episode "Escape Clause", a man is visited by the Devil, calling himself Mr. Cadwallader. This is either a nicely eerie courtyard or a horribly crappy plot to the next M. Night Shyamalan movie. "What is, what TPR members get when riding Good Tower?" Even Good Tower itself knows it's awesome. Woo! Which makes less sense: RnRC presented by underwear, or Iron Wolf presented by mayonnaise? "99 telephones walk into a bar, and start getting angry at the bartender. He says, 'Hey, fellas, what's your hang-up?'" I chuckled. Then I felt shame. This is the coolest man in Hollywood. Who Framed Roger Rabbit = awesome movie. Go see it. I COMMAND YOU. IT'S A TRAP! I was tempted to buy this and post it on my dorm room wall with quotes like "Anal Bum Cover" and "The Rapists" surrounding it. Hello ladies. Do you like my big organ? The historic plane from which Walt said, "See that giant swamp down there? That's where we'll make a whole buttload of money." (NOTE: actual quote.) Bad photo taken from Backlot Tour Is Closed. Ignore. Keep moving. Oh, Herbie. You were my favourite car/movie star back in the day. Then you got all Lohan'ed up. *sigh* If this were really Don Rickles, he'd have jokes that would make a professional comedy roaster blush. Retroness

Part II: Sortuvazubutnotreeli P.S. The preceding was brought to you by delicious and refreshing Chichi Chimi. Finally for this installation, I propose a game of "Let's Find The Dedication Plaque Error." Disney's Hollywood MGM Studio Place for Movie Films up next. Got the best seats in the house for the best show on property. This afforded me to set up my camera tripod and take this, as when I normally attempt photos of the show, the result resembles something akin to visual diarrhea. Tragedy struck the park today, as a wild animal escaped from its cage and attacked various small children. I seem to have an unspoken quota to meet with hibiscuses in updates, so... here you go. I then proceeded to commit mass ownage on the water gun game and won a chameleon. Gave to my sister. Named it Karma. Rode Dinosaur next. We were in time rovers and I saw "capacitor". I felt compelled. Oh, sure. Let's all mock Dan's arthritis. Oh, and now we have a bank angle. A non-regulation highly-banked curve on a public rail system? Screw this, I'm out. ...Aaaand now I'm calling the company hotline. What kind of railway has a 60% grade down the side of a mountain? Safety 101 should probably tell you that ain't right. ...That's it. I'm calling pest control. Oh for the love of God, the Anandapur Rail Service had better fit "track maintenance" into their list of "Crap We Should Pretty Much Always Do" soon. Jeez. Well, almost at the peak. And now to careen heedlessly around this bend, and we'll be... Now who the hell designed the railway to go straight through a shrine? Seems a right bit disrespectful to me. Better get some tea before we make the climb. ...Oh, wait, we have to go up THAT? Damn, why do I keep forgetting to hire sherpas? Mount Everest seemed a lot bigger when I was a kid... Oh, look. A tea train. I like tea. (Not really.) Let's ride. The award for World's Largest Chia Pet goes to... Anyone named Captain Bob commands my respect by default. Also, it wouldn't quite be Disney if the animals didn't talk. Welcome to Show. Here is News. And now a word from our sponsor. ...To get on Wes' good side. I'm only riding Kilimanjaro Safaris for one reason... Early morning sun + humidity + long distance = this. Getting to Animal Kingdom at 8:55 a.m. entitles you to a privileged look at humans in captivity. Now I'm just showing off to you mere mortals. WORSHIP MY SKILLS. No one has this shot. I am awesome.

So, a little backstory: As you may or may not have gleaned from my avatar, I'm currently a freshman student at Florida Tech out here in Melbourne. As such, I now reside about 90 minutes from the Orlando area, which is completely B-A. So far since I've been here (flew down on the 8th) I've been to WDW twice with a Park Hopper: A) Sunday the 9th, AK/DHS B) Saturday the 22nd, MK/AK As I've survived the first two weeks of classes and finally have a little time on my hands, I wanted to start this before I have to wait for an inordinate amount of time (see: Christmas) to do so. So, because you've clearly stopped reading (I know I would), here's the installment from Sunday the 9th. Enjoy. EDIT: Helpful Links: 1) Sunday August 9th '09: Scroll down, you lazy bastard. 2) Saturday August 22nd '09: "Same." 3) Saturday January 23rd '10: Here, I think. And we wrap tonight with the amazing KITCHEN OF FIRE, of which this picture does no justice. Had my first chicken-fried steak; was pretty damn good. Animal Kingdom coming shortly. "Wait, maybe it's big necks? Damn. I need better pickup lines. Like 'Y'arr, I'm lookin' for treasure, could I see yer chest?'. Or, 'You'll do.'" "Hey ladies... you know what they say about big tusks... no, seriously, tell me, I've no clue." ...Until of course the meteor shower hits every half-hour, then all digital/lighting/animatronic hell breaks loose. Sat near the ice caverns, which slowly segued between blue and purple tones... Rawwr, I'm a crazy T-Rex, GIMME SOME TOURISTS! Rounding out the evening was the new-ish TREX restaurant. Very similar to Rainforest Cafe (same company), only this involves dinos and is therefore a great improvement. Disney snow > regular snow. Hi Elissa. You know how some people refer to having an "inner child"? I think Carl Fredricksen is my inner old-man. I've never really considered myself an art lover until a few years ago, when I discovered the Art of Disney store. I always spend at least an hour in this place every trip, as this is probably the only "art museum" I could ever get behind. Peter Ellenshaw and Thomas Kinkade FTW. Even Disney's CEO thinks Micro Disneyland was a bad idea. ...And at the very end of Main Street lies a castle that, unlike California's, a flea can actually enjoy without making "I'm crushing you" jokes. Aah, but you can see it now... fleas from all walks of life coming to enjoy the whimsy and wonder of Disney. A family of fleas passes by, heading right for the biggest rides in the park. A travel group from the back of a Brazilian terrier, 1500 strong, waits for the signal to head to Mad Flea Party. Disney has actually created a Disneyland exclusively for fleas. This was a poorly-planned venture, as fleas lack the money or pockets required to carry said so Disney may take it. As a result, this is the most crowded Main Street has ever been. Oh my lord, it's another sad attempt at "artistic". NEXT. It should be noted that we took the boat over from Port Orleans, wherein my sister and I listened to "I'm On A Boat" at unnecessarily loud levels on her iPod. One of the most pathetically, shamefully awesome things we did that weekend. I'm starting at Downtown Disney the night before because I can and so there.

I've always thought that my main concern for going on a full TPR trip would be concentrating every fiber of my being to finishing the subsequent photo TR in under two months. Awesome shots/captions as usual Nat. Need to add a Canon Rebel XTi (or whatever the slightly cheaper SLR is) to my Christmas list. Completely OT, but how did you do with the wisdom teeth recovery?

Yes. Well, he'd kicked out holes in the casket so he could run and terrorize the campus yelling "SMILE YOU SONOFA..." all the while. A shark was chasing after him/us, but it ended up looking pretty fake. That's right. Old... and stupid. (And yes, for the record, I know Roy Scheider's dead. )

I was unfortunately in class when this was posted. When I saw Roy Scheider run by the window, I knew something was up.

From what I hear, X2 and Terminator come awfully close!

^Where's the BUFFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET?

The difference between sex and analogies is that I get analogies.