Photo TR: Super Fun Disney Time of Joyful Happiness

[dandaman]

So, a little backstory: As you may or may not have gleaned from my avatar, I'm currently a freshman student at Florida Tech out here in Melbourne. As such, I now reside about 90 minutes from the Orlando area, which is completely B-A. So far since I've been here (flew down on the 8th) I've been to WDW twice with a Park Hopper:

 

A) Sunday the 9th, AK/DHS

 

B) Saturday the 22nd, MK/AK

 

As I've survived the first two weeks of classes and finally have a little time on my hands, I wanted to start this before I have to wait for an inordinate amount of time (see: Christmas) to do so.

 

So, because you've clearly stopped reading (I know I would), here's the installment from Sunday the 9th. Enjoy.

 

EDIT: Helpful Links:

 

1) Sunday August 9th '09: Scroll down, you lazy bastard.

 

2) Saturday August 22nd '09: "Same."

 

3) Saturday January 23rd '10: Here, I think.

And we wrap tonight with the amazing KITCHEN OF FIRE, of which this picture does no justice. Had my first chicken-fried steak; was pretty damn good. Animal Kingdom coming shortly.

"Wait, maybe it's big necks? Damn. I need better pickup lines. Like 'Y'arr, I'm lookin' for treasure, could I see yer chest?'. Or, 'You'll do.'"

"Hey ladies... you know what they say about big tusks... no, seriously, tell me, I've no clue."

...Until of course the meteor shower hits every half-hour, then all digital/lighting/animatronic hell breaks loose.

Sat near the ice caverns, which slowly segued between blue and purple tones...

Rawwr, I'm a crazy T-Rex, GIMME SOME TOURISTS!

Rounding out the evening was the new-ish TREX restaurant. Very similar to Rainforest Cafe (same company), only this involves dinos and is therefore a great improvement.

Disney snow > regular snow.

Hi Elissa.

You know how some people refer to having an "inner child"? I think Carl Fredricksen is my inner old-man.

I've never really considered myself an art lover until a few years ago, when I discovered the Art of Disney store. I always spend at least an hour in this place every trip, as this is probably the only "art museum" I could ever get behind. Peter Ellenshaw and Thomas Kinkade FTW.

Even Disney's CEO thinks Micro Disneyland was a bad idea.

...And at the very end of Main Street lies a castle that, unlike California's, a flea can actually enjoy without making "I'm crushing you" jokes.

Aah, but you can see it now... fleas from all walks of life coming to enjoy the whimsy and wonder of Disney. A family of fleas passes by, heading right for the biggest rides in the park. A travel group from the back of a Brazilian terrier, 1500 strong, waits for the signal to head to Mad Flea Party.

Disney has actually created a Disneyland exclusively for fleas. This was a poorly-planned venture, as fleas lack the money or pockets required to carry said so Disney may take it. As a result, this is the most crowded Main Street has ever been.

Oh my lord, it's another sad attempt at "artistic". NEXT.

It should be noted that we took the boat over from Port Orleans, wherein my sister and I listened to "I'm On A Boat" at unnecessarily loud levels on her iPod. One of the most pathetically, shamefully awesome things we did that weekend.

I'm starting at Downtown Disney the night before because I can and so there.

Edited February 27, 2010 by dandaman

[dandaman]

Part II: Sortuvazubutnotreeli

P.S. The preceding was brought to you by delicious and refreshing Chichi Chimi.

Finally for this installation, I propose a game of "Let's Find The Dedication Plaque Error." Disney's Hollywood MGM Studio Place for Movie Films up next.

Got the best seats in the house for the best show on property. This afforded me to set up my camera tripod and take this, as when I normally attempt photos of the show, the result resembles something akin to visual diarrhea.

Tragedy struck the park today, as a wild animal escaped from its cage and attacked various small children.

I seem to have an unspoken quota to meet with hibiscuses in updates, so... here you go.

I then proceeded to commit mass ownage on the water gun game and won a chameleon. Gave to my sister. Named it Karma.

Rode Dinosaur next. We were in time rovers and I saw "capacitor". I felt compelled.

Oh, sure. Let's all mock Dan's arthritis.

Oh, and now we have a bank angle. A non-regulation highly-banked curve on a public rail system? Screw this, I'm out.

...Aaaand now I'm calling the company hotline. What kind of railway has a 60% grade down the side of a mountain? Safety 101 should probably tell you that ain't right.

...That's it. I'm calling pest control.

Oh for the love of God, the Anandapur Rail Service had better fit "track maintenance" into their list of "Crap We Should Pretty Much Always Do" soon. Jeez.

Well, almost at the peak. And now to careen heedlessly around this bend, and we'll be...

Now who the hell designed the railway to go straight through a shrine? Seems a right bit disrespectful to me.

Better get some tea before we make the climb.

...Oh, wait, we have to go up THAT? Damn, why do I keep forgetting to hire sherpas?

Mount Everest seemed a lot bigger when I was a kid...

Oh, look. A tea train. I like tea. (Not really.) Let's ride.

The award for World's Largest Chia Pet goes to...

Anyone named Captain Bob commands my respect by default. Also, it wouldn't quite be Disney if the animals didn't talk.

Welcome to Show. Here is News. And now a word from our sponsor.

...To get on Wes' good side.

I'm only riding Kilimanjaro Safaris for one reason...

Early morning sun + humidity + long distance = this.

Getting to Animal Kingdom at 8:55 a.m. entitles you to a privileged look at humans in captivity.

Now I'm just showing off to you mere mortals. WORSHIP MY SKILLS.

No one has this shot. I am awesome.

[dandaman]

Part III: DHS incl. RnRC/ToT/TSM/ST/BLT/OMG/WTF/BBQ

The preceding was brought to you by delicious and refreshing Bo.

Finally, we see multiple Disney characters... ON A BOAT.

 

Hopefully I'll have some time in the next few days to do the 8/22 installment. 'Till then, folks.

Is this how Californians drive?

This gentleman looks so classy I almost WANT to be glove-slapped by him.

Two things to note (aside from the obvious Halloween 1939 reference):

 

A) The Twilight Zone premiered on 10/2/59.

 

B) In the episode "Escape Clause", a man is visited by the Devil, calling himself Mr. Cadwallader.

This is either a nicely eerie courtyard or a horribly crappy plot to the next M. Night Shyamalan movie.

"What is, what TPR members get when riding Good Tower?"

Even Good Tower itself knows it's awesome. Woo!

Which makes less sense: RnRC presented by underwear, or Iron Wolf presented by mayonnaise?

"99 telephones walk into a bar, and start getting angry at the bartender. He says, 'Hey, fellas, what's your hang-up?'"

 

I chuckled. Then I felt shame.

This is the coolest man in Hollywood.

Who Framed Roger Rabbit = awesome movie. Go see it. I COMMAND YOU.

IT'S A TRAP!

I was tempted to buy this and post it on my dorm room wall with quotes like "Anal Bum Cover" and "The Rapists" surrounding it.

Hello ladies. Do you like my big organ?

The historic plane from which Walt said, "See that giant swamp down there? That's where we'll make a whole buttload of money." (NOTE: actual quote.)

Bad photo taken from Backlot Tour Is Closed. Ignore. Keep moving.

Oh, Herbie. You were my favourite car/movie star back in the day. Then you got all Lohan'ed up. *sigh*

If this were really Don Rickles, he'd have jokes that would make a professional comedy roaster blush.

Retroness

[Frade]

Hey Dan, great photos man!

 

I really like the on-ride photos you took on Everest, they are neat and not shaky.

 

Good job, keep it up. I am looking forward to see the rest of the update.

 

Later amigo

[coastersrule85]

Wow, gorgeous photos, and a great report!

Love the post titles. LOL

[ebl]

Very clever captions...I enjoyed this Photo TR.

 

Eric

[Mr. Starr]

I'm pretty sure that I've sat at the exact same table at T-Rex, but I'm not sure. Definitely a worthy restaurant, and awesome captions!

[dandaman]

Thanks for the replies, folks. Always appreciated. I should have the 8/22 photos up sometime next week. However, I might post pics from SeaWorld tomorrow; going for the first time with "Frade" who posted up there, who's also a Florida Tech student. Which is awesome.

[dandaman]

8/22/09: Partners, Polynesian and a "Parking Lot 101"

And finally, a flamingo in a Mickey sombrero. I don't know why, either.

Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oy Oy Oy!

Cheese-on-a-stick < Mickey-on-a-stick (

Went on Dinosaur. Hammed it up. Life's good. (That's "unnamed friend" in the blue.)

Rode once in front, twice in back. Still as great a ride as ever.

"Eeeeeeexcellent."

So we decided to go to Animal Kingdom on our park-hoppers after lunch. We were waiting for the AK bus when a guy apparently at the end of his vacation gives us SEVEN unused Fastpasses for Everest. After the car trouble, I think I believe in karma now. Or something. (Just realized now that they're actually for two days before, but the CM's must not have caught it either or didn't care.)

Eh. S'decent.

Found at the cafe bartop.

Following our mini-crisis, we went to the Polynesian for some grub. Ohana's wasn't open yet (or it was a long wait, can't remember) so we went to Kona Cafe and had some pretty decent burgers.

So the friend who very kindly drove me here for the day remembered she'd left her fog lights on from earlier. Sure enough we get back to the car and the battery's dead. On top of that, we tried to start it and the alarm wouldn't shut up. About 5 minutes of this went by before a Disney security car pulls up and the guy tries to jump the battery, but alas, not enough juice on the pack. So another 10 minutes of incessant wailing goes by (before you ask, there was no panic/reset button we could find) and another security guy comes up, stuffs a towel in the siren, and jumps the car for us. Needless to say it was one of those hilariously bad experiences you just have to shake your head at. (To the entire parking lot security detail... you guys ROCK!) Also, empty tram.

Best ride in the park.

Started to put up the castle lights the week I was there. Crane's pretty ugly against the castle but a necessary evil nonetheless.

Fast Train is FAST

Hooray for Big Titty Mama Railroad! [/subtle]

Part II: Something Goes Wrong

Life Cycle of a Disney Ride

 

Part I: What Could Go Wrong?

"Y'arr, appears t' be many a buccaneer havin' a battle out yonder! Set sail for Chicago!"

I hope they get the point in the end. LOVE ME FOR MY WIT.

Hi Wes

5 seconds later: "You maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! Damn you all to HELL!"

Hidden Fact: It's written in Cast Member blood.

We hit Jungle Cruise first. 'Cause we're smart.

Five Dan Smith Fun Bucks to whoever knows what the preceding captions referenced.

"HEY!"

"Yatatata, yatatata..."

"A-cause, a-nobody, a-loves, a-me..."

"IIIIIIIIIII ain't got no-boooooo-dee..."

Happened to be passing by as the trolley show was performing the Superbowl Shuffle.

"...And we'll put gift shops all the way along that side. But there will always be some attraction-specific merchandise up for sale. Got that?"

If this were California, the building at right would be fully obscured by a palm tree.

Welcome back to the location where wish-like experiences come to fruition.

[RCTfan]

Those are really great photos! I especially enjoyed the Splash Mountain one!

 

I would've loved the Festival of the Lion King ones...but uhh... you missed the best part of the show... the stilt walkers. Shame.

[dino]

Great TR. Loved the captions, I was just lame enough to actually get all of them.

[dandaman]

^It helps to be a little lame on this site!

[tnguy]

1. I still have not seen Festival of the Lion King.

 

2. I must have a flamingo in a mickey sombrero

 

3. Great TR

[larrygator]

Dan - You're Just a Gigolo. Keep you Fun Bucks and spend it on your Gigoloness.

[dandaman]

^ Rollin' in my '64

 

 

(If I had time before class I would so make a personalized old-man rap.)

[dandaman]

It's... ALIIIIIIIVE.

 

The first of these two updates is from January 23rd and consists almost solely of Epcot goodness, while the second from February 14/15 features Animal Kingdom, Magic Kingdom and losing my Old Town virginity and getting my first new credit since September. Enjoy the usual insanity.

Welcome back to EPCOT, or as Walt stated in his vision, “Everybody Purchasing Crazy-Overpriced Tickets”. (Yeah, I'm sure you have your own alternate acronym. Deal with it.)

So, because my friend drove me today but didn’t stay for long, I decided to go the long way to Epcot (i.e. drop-off at TTC, experience “grimy-version” monorail beam for final time). Took about as much time as the regular parking would have anyway, though in hindsight, parking at the Boardwalk would’ve made more sense… but if there’s anything you should know by now, it’s that making sense has no place in my reports.

 

So… yeah. Mission: Sinise, which my sister finally went on the more-intense side and actually LOVED it, and this is coming from the person who comes close to freaking out at the “drop” in Pirates.

One little spark of inspiration got replaced by a relative lack of imagination. Irony is never lost on modern-day Epcot, is it? (Also that creepy Eric Idle projection I have dubbed "Moonraper."

“Look at all the tour groups! There must be a Brazilian of ‘em!” -- Dan, on the subject of horrible puns

“See, my bro, Jaws? He’s actually pretty nice, good with kids. It was always just that damn Roy Scheider… he wanted a bigger boat, J-Dog wanted more screen-time and to look less mechanical. Guess who won? I mean, for God’s sake, he had a whole monologue written out for his death scene and Spielberg didn’t go for it.”

 

(Moral of the above: You can make any picture/caption combo work, as long as you’re clinically insane.)

Coral Reef for lunch, and holy crap, chicken with Applewood bacon and pasta = love.

Also tasty, but with a noticeably unfortunate lack of bacon.

“But why can’t you rebuild past Epcot instead?” – Fanboys

Tried to duplicate a shot I took last February. I wouldn’t call it a fail, per se, but… sort of.

“Blind taste tests: Nothing bad can ever become of them!”

“Mmmmmyes, an unmistakably bold taste… and do I detect a faint hint of liquid failure…?”

“…OHMUHGUH ITALY WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN MY PALATE?!”

This kid was awesome. It was his birthday, so the mariachi band sang to him while he ate a unicorn pop and didn’t give a crap about said band.

WHARRGARBL.

I really want this roof, if only to have shingle-installers become incredibly confused, then I can yell at them to get off my lawn, and then when they climb down, to get off my lawn again! Ha-HA! I’m old, you see.

Some boats have T-Pain. Some boats have dangerous explosives. Some boats with dangerous explosives need to be overtaken by John McClane. This is one of those three. Choose wisely.

I Like Fish. I. Like. Fish.

HARIBO HARIBO OMG HARIBO… they’re quite good, is what I mean to say.

Pictured: Where I spent an entire half of my first-ever day on Disney property in 1994.

Epcot was smart to build the Italy pavilion on the exact opposite side of the park from their liquid failure substation.

“And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.” Amen. (And yes, I typed that out of memory. I’m a nerd. Again, I must implore you to deal with it.)

The Roman Super Bowl never really caught on, but the losing team was always stoned to death, making it more badass than today’s commercial break with a football game in between.

“Well, boys, the pizzeria looks good enough. Let’s set opening day for next week.”

 

“But, sir, remember what happened with Test Tra…”

 

“Cram it, Luigi.”

Testing your colour settings out of courtesy.

“Our planet has been through a lot this year, but we have not forgotten what is truly important... the great taste of Charleston Chew!” Sidenote: When I typed this originally, I was having my first-ever Charleston Chew. Now I know why Earth President Nixon loves it so.

America! **** YEAH!

Apple pie! Baseball! Bald eagles! McDonald's! The 80’s! Economic recession!

My favourite show on Disney property. (No, seriously. Voices of Liberty first, American Adventure second. These people are awesome.)

“Well, sure, I get the $100, but if it’s any consolation, George, you’ll be featured on a lot of fast-food dollar menus some day.”

Oh, if I had a quarter for every time I've said that... I'd be broke.

“If this car goes under 50 miles an hour we’ll all EXPLODE!”

Mounties! Snow! Hockey! Maple syrup! Celine D… uh… Tim Hortons!

Sadly, this reminds me that I'm now 19 as of a few weeks ago... and I won't be able to take advantage of Canaba's lovely casinos/alcoholic beverages until at least June. (Then again if I had stayed up there for school, you wouldn't be reading this.)

Random night shots to end with.

Oh, and also, the driver mentioned earlier brought 3 other friends of ours along that night, so we went to Beaches & Cream after in order to tackle the Kitchen Sink. There were no survivors.

 

February update coming... sometime. Soon, I hope.

[jray21]

What a finish to a great report! Nothing beats ice cream. Nothing.

[ECZenith]

I love your report, and your photos. I completely forgot that East Coast Thunder Mountain has an indoor station, and therefore, I am now jealous.