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"Pointlessness: The Ride."

So over the past few months, the girlfriend and I went on a mission to carefully rate and come up with our end-all-be-all list of the more 'iconic' burger places... Since we had trips out to CA/Texas, and living in the Midwest, this has included In-N-Out, Culvers, Five Guys, Shake Shack and a local place Swensons here in Ohio. All double cheeseburgers judged with similar toppings primarily (fully loaded, basically), but also animal style, w/ peppers and other variations as well offered. Not judging fries or anything, but some notes on that in the misc. areas. At the end of the day, it's hard NOT to include price as a factor… Especially when some of the more ‘upscale’ options if you will, can be nearly double in price, but not twice as good if you catch my drift. So I will say this, #1 and #2 are basically neck and neck. One strictly overall quality/taste, while the other because the value and quality offered. So it’s tough. So some of our comments/notes/scores below, in order from our favorite to least favorite, with notes. #1 – Shake Shack At the burger level alone, they reign supreme. The best flavor, thanks to their cooking method and seasoning. Does not taste processed. The cheese factor here is excellent. Melty and compliments the patties perfectly. It was a gooey, delicious mess. Toppings were all fresh. Really dig the cherry pepper option for some acidity/mild heat added. Bun is really soft, tastes great. While toasted, did not notice any real ‘flavor’ from the bun, in terms of char or anything. Burger is juicy, meaty/cheesy and is exactly what you want/expect in a burger. I think out of them all, this takes the grand prize for sure. Misc Notes – Pricing is high… Probably double that of In-N-Out, Culvers and Swensons. Menu is a bit more diverse. Shakes are good. Fries are decent, nothing special. #2 – In-N-Out At the patty level, the beef does have a bit more processed/fast food character than say Shake Shack or Five Guys. But it’s not a negative, just a flavor characteristic. Overall, the complete burger is delicious. Very fresh toppings, fresh and crisp, always looks ‘perfect’. Cheese melts really well… No complaints here! Animal Style, Peppers, 3x3’s and 4x4’s offer more flexibility. Love me some animal style or traditional with the peppers added. Both delicious! Price is excellent… You get a lot for the money. Bun is the best of the bunch. For some reason, the buttery/char character is always prevalent and adds so much depth to the entire burger. Misc Notes – I dig the atmosphere of these… The hustle/bustle inside, watching them fresh cut potatoes in the window while waiting in the drive-thru and the long lines wrapped around the building. It just has a cool ‘vibe’. I also really dig the neapolitan shake… For me, it beats the shakes I have had at Shake Shack… About half the price, to boot! Fries are ‘boring’, I wouldn’t consider them better or worse than Shake Shack plain… But animal style? Yeah, easy win. #3 – Five Guys Very close to Shake-Shack on the burger patty front… High quality patty with a *touch* of that processed/fast food taste. Not as much as In-N-Out, but certainly more than Shake Shack. Slight smash burger char character, but not as much as Shake Shack in that regard. Bun is good, but offers nothing to the rest of the burger. Cheese melt is fantastic. Becomes another beefy/cheese goop of wonderfulness. Veggies good, but a bit more subdued compared to the top two. Doesn’t seem to ‘pop’ as much in visual or taste. Nothing special. Overall, can’t go wrong here! I prefer the top two more, but this is a damn solid burger at the end of the day. May not look as ‘commercial ready’ when served, but it’s the taste that matters here! Misc Notes – More pricey like Shake Shack. Plenty of topping options to customize. Best fries of the bunch, IMO. #4 – Culvers Beef reminds me of In-N-Out, salt/flavor wise, but with some additional complexity from being a smash burger (char). So +1 there. Cheese is weird here, doesn’t want to melt well. The whole point of processed American cheese is to melt well, what is going on?? Intense raw onion (way more than other places), multiple visits. Getting the caramelized onion helped… I don’t like it lingering for hours, as much as I love onion. Just behind In-N-Out in the value front, pricing is good. Bun is soft, but doesn’t add any real char/flavor to the rest of the burger. Nothing special. Overall, Culvers comes across a bit ‘boring’ overall. Good, solid burger, but I’d pick any of the others if I had the option and price was not an influence. They are just better. #5 Swensons Local place here in Ohio, dating back to 1930’s. It’s a Drive-In style place where they run out to your car and all that… So wanted to throw them into the mix! Beef is the most processed/fast-foody of them all. Most like say, Mcdonalds in texture/flavor. No char/grill flavor. Burger is smaller. Bun is soft and quite sweet… Not a bad thing, just quite different to the rest. Veggies OK. I do like the green olive toothpicked through the middle of the burger. Nice touch! Price/value is good. Overall, the burger comes across more sweet/salty mix, which is interesting. Not bad, just again, different! Not the same caliber as the other four. But it’s fun and unique in it’s own way, it’s taste is quite unique. At the end of the day when you do factor in price, In-N-Out is our overall winner. Always solid, value is great, burgers are delicious. Can’t go wrong and always a must-visit (or a few visits…) when one is nearby. Yes, it’s still fast food (any of them are), but it is just a special/fun treat for us to splurge on junk food wise on trips/vacations because it’s super rare we ever get burgers/fast food in general. But man, Shake Shack burgers are something else... Ignoring price/value, it’s the clear winner. The beef quality, cooking method, veggies/sauce. Five Guys is also an overall better quality beef/taste in that regard, but lack in the veggie department and presentation compared. Shake Shack or Five Guys for overall burger quality if you want no/minimal fast foody taste, but In-N-Out as the well rounded all-star.

Ugh, I hope not. With how crazy multi-launch coasters have gotten, not to mention Pantheon being literally RIGHT THERE, Drachen Spire looks extremely uninspired.

SWO teasing track! Surf coaster...???

Man, it's so weird to just see that big empty plot of land in the middle of that prime real estate. I know Goliath typically didn't run much at all, but it really drew your eye. Here's hoping they figure out something to go there sooner rather than later.

Chilly? B**ch please. And by the way it turns out Shenendoah Lumber Company had no minimum temperature limit. Can you believe our luck? What a great day at Kings Dominion.

Some stupid unexperienced medical network bought out all the local hospitals and clinics, and a year later, our hospitals and clinics are now closed. With no heads up whatsoever. I have got to get out of this hellhole.