What's your timeline?

[Thrillrider15]

I was just wondering what your timelines were of your whole life.

[dj snow]

And if I may add: In 500 words or less, please.

[Meteornotes]

Well, let's see...

 

1962 - Found by group of penguins in a crater. Raised by them and taught their secret ninja skills. And learned of their near-insatiable desire for cheese

 

1975 - Embarked on my journey to the moon.

 

1976 - Finally realized that you cannont, in fact, walk to the moon. Settled for my second choice: Shippensburg, PA.

 

1980 - Watched a lot of TV

 

1984 - Graduated college, after majoring in pool and TV watching

 

1997 - Began to train my cats to perform various tasks related to my eventual conquering of the Earth and installing myself as Ruler Of All. Plan abandoned a few minutes later when cats doze off during my first lecture about how after I take over the planet, I'm going to sterilize anyone that talks during a movie.

 

2002 - Started to construct a giant killer robot out of Diet Coke cans. Project continues unsucessfully, as I just can't get it to actually kill anything.

 

2005 - Working on a time machine. First thing I'll do with it? Stop American Idol from ever getting on the air.

 

My mission here is accomplished...

 

dt

[Louise]

^ There's a couple of big gaps there..... He said your "whole life", I think you owe us more information.

 

"Dave Thomas: The Lost Years"

 

Louise "my timeline would be heinously dull" Royle

[Luxo]

Fine, here are the true details of my life:

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Quite standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shawn scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there I joined Theme Park Review and the rest is history.

[niiicolaaah]

Well, let's see...

 

1962 - Found by group of penguins in a crater. Raised by them and taught their secret ninja skills. And learned of their near-insatiable desire for cheese

 

1975 - Embarked on my journey to the moon.

 

1976 - Finally realized that you cannont, in fact, walk to the moon. Settled for my second choice: Shippensburg, PA.

 

1980 - Watched a lot of TV

 

1984 - Graduated college, after majoring in pool and TV watching

 

1997 - Began to train my cats to perform various tasks related to my eventual conquering of the Earth and installing myself as Ruler Of All. Plan abandoned a few minutes later when cats doze off during my first lecture about how after I take over the planet, I'm going to sterilize anyone that talks during a movie.

 

2002 - Started to construct a giant killer robot out of Diet Coke cans. Project continues unsucessfully, as I just can't get it to actually kill anything.

 

2005 - Working on a time machine. First thing I'll do with it? Stop American Idol from ever getting on the air.

 

My mission here is accomplished...

 

dt

 

 

ahhaha lol

[niiicolaaah]

you want it, you got it.

 

september 13, 1983 - born in niagara falls ny

1984 - did stuff one-year-olds do

1985 - had really curly hair. liked to run around in my undies with a bucket on my head.

1986 - went to Canada's Wonderland for the first time. I loved the swan boat thingy.

1987 - went to Crystal Beach; was terrified of Laff-in-the-Dark

1988 - went to skool

1989 - Crystal beach closed; I mourned I would never ride the Comet

1990 - while on the lazy river at martin's fantasy island, i saw the comet track in storage... damn them for not building it there!! but i guess it will never be as cool as it was when it was against the water

1991 - i was still in school and i learned stuff

1992 - i went to disney world for the first (and only, so far) time. rode my first "real" (non-kiddie) coasters... space mt and big thunder

1993 - i started playing the clarinet.

1994 - got my first computer, and text-based internet. went to cedar point for the first time. rode raptor in the front row, joygasmed. was hooked on coasters. magnum in the pouring rain, however, was not so great. i think we waited something insane like 2 hours for raptor.

1995 - um, what can i say about 7th grade. we had a power outage and my earth science teacher made us still take notes with just the emergency lights on, the room had no windows

1996 - went back to cedar point, rode mantis which my dad loved, got stuck on the 1st lift of draggin' iron ("i can barely tell the difference!" - my coaster nut mom).. haven't been to CP since

1997 - had my first band, we were "goth rock" and had no drummer... our dog died when i was at Darien Lake

1998 - my favorite part of the band trip was the side trip to PKD... I got pulled up to play in wind ensemble cuz one of the clarinets couldn't go... i was the only freshman and it was very scary but cool... watched the construction of Silver Comet

1999 - Watched them build Silver Comet some more (WHY THE HELL didn't i take any pictures??!!??!!)... rode Silver Comet and found my favourite woody ever <3 .... heard that Prince song a lot. made conference all state.

2000 - went to NYC for the first time with the Greater Buffalo Youth Orchestra... made conference all state... i hosted a Y2K alien-themed new year's party

2001 - graduated high school, went to college. got first digital camera, became camwhore. did typical college student things. made a hilarious video with my friends.

2002 - played my guitar at lots of open mic nights. went to chicago for the first (only) time.

2003 - was finally in college symphony, rejoiced at flambouyantly gay conductor. we also had a grad conductor guy from Germany who was very cool and sometimes said things nobody could understand

2004 - took Technology in Music, fell in love with imac G5s... played principal clarinet in pit orchestra for Bernstein's "Candide" which was AMAZING.... dated one of the leads lol what a groupie.

2005 - rung in the new year wasted on Long Island, had champagne for the first time, went to Chinatown for the first time, went to Little Italy and had old Italian guys hitting on us... i love NYC!!!

2006 - ????? What I know for sure... I will be going to NYC for new year's... I'm going to the University at Buffalo for my graduate work in music ed starting in january... interviewing for teaching jobs here and in Virginia (friends there), visiting my crazy brain-twin Liz in Virginia and breaking coaster #50... maybe she'll break #10 LOL... hopefully getting an apartment with my weird-and-awesome Bosnian friend Elbisa... making some random friends and hopefully a few bucks too as I teach at the music school and the retail hell... i'll be doing the greenhouse in the summer and making mad cash, hopefully I'll remember sunscreen more often this summer

 

 

As you can see, my life is pretty hilarious, and filled with lots of music and a couple coasters!

[Carnage]

Fine, here are the true details of my life:

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Quite standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shawn scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there I joined Theme Park Review and the rest is history.

 

Austin Power's fan?

[waterviper]

1973-Present: To damn drunk to remember anything!

[Luxo]

Fine, here are the true details of my life:

My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Quite standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shawn scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there I joined Theme Park Review and the rest is history.

 

Austin Power's fan?

 

Guilty!