Standard stuff, am always telling my wife I want to leave half an hour before I actually want to leave, that way, she has to be nice to me for the whole day cause she made us late and I am happy knowing I'm not late mwahahaha seriously, I don't do this every day!
The MLIA is funnier if when reading it in your head, you read My Life is AWESOME at the end instead of Average, you can imagine them being really boring and telling you this awesome story, makes the whole thing funnier somehow!
Yeah I guess I don't read them right because when I read them its just boring.