robbalvey

Hoodies are going to ship on TUESDAY of next week, so order yours now! http://www.themeparkreview.com/store/index.php?categoryID=3 We have made a VERY limited run of hoodie sizes this year so order yours NOW before they are out of stock! --Robb

Universal Orlando and Halloween Horror Nights! Piers says "Hurrrah!!!" Hooray! Hooray! It's our Universal Orlando day! Omg! Omg! The ringy dingy ding-a-ling dings are up! The ringy dingy ding-a-ling dings are up! "Grrrrr! I'm angry penguin guy! I'm gonna EAT THIS BABY!!!" "I'll take the fat penguin...he's kind of like Robb!" PLEASE DONT EAT ME MR.LION!!! We recognize this guy. Do you know who he is? If you do... Today, Elissa Alvey will be playing the role of grouper on "Good Mummy!" VIP Tours for TPR! We are doing the "Unmasking the Horror" tour today. If you are a fan of HHN or just like seeing "behind the scenes" at theme parks, we highly recommend this tour! Is it real? Or is it Memorex? The HHN 19 "model" on display for the tour was VERY impressive! Creepy! If it's Halloween... And my personal favorite! The tour gives you a behind the scenes look at the layout of all the houses and how these guys produced all this scary stuff! This should be a pretty cool scare zone tonight! "Hey Litterbug! In the clown's mouth!" "Now before we go in these houses, we have to perform an HHN ritual..." "Body Cavity Search!!! SPREAD 'EM!!!!" Just kidding guys... Why, yes, we will take the VIP entrance, thank you very much! This year's group of TPR Halloween fans! And everyone say thank you to Michael Roddy, Mark Patterson, and everyone at Universal who helped put our event together! First up on "Unmasking the Horror" tour was the Frankenstein house. VIP tour guide Mark Patterson gave us an amazing behind the scenes look at three Halloween Horror Nights mazes. Anyone need a casket yet? "Hey guys, what do you want us to do with this extra boohole?" Ooooh...Frankenstein likes Chinese Food! Piers, NO LOVE MAKING WITH ANY PROPS!!!! YES! SAW THAT LEG RIGHT OFF!!! CUT RIGHT THROUGH THE BONE!!! PIERS!!! RELEASE!!!! Now THIS is the kind of treatment you get on TPR Tours! Sign up now! "Shhhh...don't tell anyone, but this guy has no penis!" Anyone recognize these props? If you do... Poor, poor Victor... Universal Creative Director Michael Roddy tells us about Dracula. "This is not the Boris Karlof Dracula you may remember but more Vlad the Impaler." The sick and twisted Roddy likes to sit and watch the impaled bodies slump over and slowly die. He's into that sort of stuff! Lenticular portraits made just for this maze...very nice attention to detail! This is what happens when you miss the TPR bus on a tour! "Ok, guys, we know you like to eat, so we've set up the buffet!" The detail in all of Universal's mazes is just incredible. You would think you're in these actual locations! Thank you again to Michael! (He seems to be very worried about something up in the sky...hmm.....) Hollywood Rip Ride Rockit was AWESOME!!! I picked Moving Right Along by the Muppets and it was the silliest roller coaster ride ever! The entire ride was fantastic! The drop produced great airtime... ...the "non-inverting loop" was actually more intense than most inverting loops! And there were surprises around every corner. This ride is a HUGE WIN for Universal Orlando! This takes me back to my days of working on Call of Duty! "My hero!" Universal Orlando is Big Mike approved!!! Harry Potter construction update!!! Ooohhh...Aaaahhhh... Piers is having a few pre-HHN beers at Moe's. Piers has found his new husband! One of the best mazes of the event! One of the best mazes of the event! (Oh, who are we kidding, they were ALL good!) That's right..TPR gets VIP...I mean RIP treatment! A bit of drinking before our RIP Tour to calm the nerves? R.I.P. Tour. The ONLY way to do Halloween Horror Nights! Seriously, it's a night of great fun. Front of the line to all the mazes and rides. We highly recommend booking this tour with Universal's VIP Tour Department! Even before it gets completely dark, Universal Orlando is transformed into something creepy and weird. Looks like this production isn't going so well... Hot chicks serving booze are everywhere! HHN Signature shot!!! Leave it to Cleaver has been a TPR favorite so far! "Whatever you do, don't go into the green colored fog..." "Look! It's a drink! And it glows! Ain't that cool?" Hey Doug! Thanks for helping keep us safe in Amity! The Spawning - very bizarre! Cirque Du Freak was one of the many scare zones this year... Yeah, there were some pretty freakish monsters hanging around in here... I can't decide if I'm turned on or freaked out... OMG! There was nothing more freakish than these two deformed creatures! Rat lady...she's HOT! "Hey Ladies, I'm Jon...and when I'm done with you two I've got a special place to take both of you..." "...that's right, I'm gonna chop you up and put you in these two coffins. Because I'm just that weird!" Yay! More VIP awesomeness at the Bill & Ted Show! Hey look! We got our own private Bill & Ted show! Well not really, Joey Fatone was there too. This will be the last photo you see of Bill & Ted, because if you take a picture, they put you in that "leg sawing off thing" you saw in the Frankenstein maze. We made a pitstop at Simpsons... More mazes... ...more rides... ...more chainsaws! Another AWESOME Halloween Horror Nights!!! Remember you can follow us LIVE on Facebook! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Today was a day of epic proportions. TPR has done Food & Wine Festival as a group for the last 4 or 5 years now, but NOTHING has ever been as amazing as Joey drinking 17 drinks "Around the World" today. So now, we present to you, an epic TPR day at Epcot! (ps. If you haven't seen all the "Postcards from Space" that we emailed Dan today, scroll up three posts...WATCH THEM ALL...they are amazing!!!) Today is Epcot - the best theme park in the world! Piers would like to point out that Epcot has highlighted the "N" in IllumiNations as to not confuse it with IllumiGaytions. Piers also would like to point out that IllumiGaytions is also sponsered by semens. Epcot employees all have these deformed giant hands. Does Mark Wyatt owe you money? Refunds this way... "Dear Epcot. We will never forgive you for destroying Horizons...but Mission: Space is pretty cool too!" We would like "unknown heart condition" side please. Epcot is empty today! Nerd shot!!! Are we ready for Gary? "Hey Wes...lube up and bend over!" You guys ready for Lunar Orbit "insertion?" Elissa did insertion as she has a much larger penis than the rest of the group. Hmmm...we can send an email to anyone? Who do you think we should email? "Dan is going to have a LOT of emails from space!" Want to join in the fun? EMAIL DAN and tell him "hello from space!" mrt0ad13@aol.com Welcome to Epcot Food And Wine Festival! Time for copius amounts of food and alcohol! Frozen Dragon Berry Coloda, please! Can Joey drink around the world? Can he really do it? Drink #1. Frozen mojito! Elissa friendly food! Food and Wine is Icebat approved! Canada has choup! And that's all I need! Joey Drink #2 moosehead beer! Yummmmm....sausage! Hey Dan! We have "choup!". Everyone EMAIL DAN and tell him "You have no choup!". mrt0ad13@aol.com Ewww...New Zealand....SKIP! Take a WILD guess what we are having here! Warm chocolate gooey Bailey's cake... ...and Guiness! You can find Piers and Emily in here! Ummmm...what a cute little pussy. Oh Man. Lots of money will be spent here! Joey Drink # 3 pomegranite Kir! OH! MY! GOD! I need a tissue. Joey Drink #4 Grolsch Lager. (Hanno approves!) Half of you don't have drinks! FAIL!!! Baklava!! There's going to be a party in MY tummy! I miss Japan! Joey Drink #5 Mimosa from Morrocco! More pita = happy Elissa! Joey says "hello from Japan!" Chuck highly reccomenda the New Orleans Praline Bread Pudding! The stain on Joey's shirt says "Drink #6 New Orleans SazzaRazz" Matt, this ones for you! Joey Drink #7 Sam Adams 14th Anniversary Festival Beer. Swallow that creme! Drink #8. Some sort of sparkling wine...Joey thinks! Larry says "baby cow tastes gooooood with beer!" German stuff!!! YUMMMM! Joey Drink #9 Beck's Oktoberfest! Larry asks "Would you rather be a blind mermaid or have your leg amputated but if your leg is amputated you can get a fastpass to ANY ride you want!". To answer EMAIL DAN. mrt0ad13@aol.comAdd a captionLarry asks "Would you rather be a blind mermaid or have your leg amputated but if your leg is amputated you can get a fastpass to ANY ride you want!". To answer EMAIL DAN. mrt0ad13@aol.com Jon loves (to) Bangkok! Joey is double fisting drinking #9 (Beck's) and holding #10 Singha Beer! What should Piers put in his mouth during IllumiGaytions? If you think you know...EMAIL DAN!!! mrt0ad13@aol.com Should Joey get his face painted like the "Tricky Troll?". EMAIL DAN! mrt0ad13@aol.com Drink #10 and Drink #11 King Fisher! "11 drinks later it's time to break the seal!" Drink #12 Chinese Heavenly Clouds. "Better than normal sex." We took a break from eating and drinking outside and continued eating and drinking inside! Proof that Joey is drunk - He left a 24% tip! Piers give you a surprise look at the costumes for IllumiGaytions! Piers got the parasol boob credit! Joey says "Yay Poland!" Joey Drink #14. Some red fruity slushy with vodka! Drink #14 and #15 - a shot of tequila and a sangria chaser! "There is a very good chance...that...after I drink this... I am gonna die!" Mexico City! We are almost done drinking around the world! Joey Drink #16 Dos Equis. HE DID IT!!! Joey had CONQUERED DRINKING AROUND THE WORLD! Girls...bow down to him! Worship him! Take his penis into your person!!! (who are we kidding?) But still! THE DAMN JEW DID IT!!! Congrats Joey! BTW, if you would like to congratulate Joey for drinking around the world. EMAIL DAN!!! mrt0ad13@aol.com OMG! A new Robocoastet attraction has opened! How come no one told us about this??? I can't believe we can't rely on anyone on TPR to report this kind of stuff! Yup Design-your-own robocoaster simulator ride. It's a robocoaster arm with a video screen! Could we have found a giant A$$ bathroom stall BIGGER than the one by Rock N Roller Coaster??? Alternate view of potential biggest ever bathroom stall. Noooo! Giant electric skull attacking Piers! NOM. NOM. NOM. IllumiNations - not as epic as IllumiGaytions is going to be on Friday! As you can see...it was an EPIC DAY at Epcot!!!! Tomorrow is Halloween Horror Nights with lots of "behind the scenes" stuff! Follow the LIVE UPDATES on FaceBook! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Joey has conquered Epcot's Food & Wine Festival! 16 drinks around the world! Live Updates on Facebook - www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Live updates from Epcot's Food and Wine Festival going on NOW!!! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Yes, please leave the moderating duties to the mods, thank you!

NOTE!!! There are a lot of "EMAIL DANS" in this update. We really need EVERYONE to do this! Please, when you see an EMAIL DAN prompt, DO IT!!! Thank you! Smile if you're from California! (Renee stop that!!!) Here is where we parked at Sea World. New credit!!! You guys excited about Manta? It's a bit like making sweet love to Cher. It's tall, sleek, sexy, makes you a bit nervous at the start, calms you down with soothing curves then give you that hint of intensity you needed. JUST like making love to Cher! Penguins are always sexy! Macaroni and Penguin will be served during Illumigaytions. Look everyone! I won three penguins! "Nobody ever wins a giant A$$ squid." ringy dingy ding-a-ling dings AWAY!!! One of these things is not like the other. One of these things does not belong. If you know... EMAIL DAN! mrt0ad13@aol.com First ten people with the right answer (and your mailing address) will get a bag o crap! Some more Manta hotness for you! Manta is an amazing piece of work. Great ride. Amazing themed queue and area. Zero G goodness. SKLOOSH!!! KidTums climbed the entire net structure...ALL BY HERSELF! Awww.... How old do you think Hanno is? If you know... EMAIL DAN! mrt0ad13@aol.com First 10 people with the right answer get a bag o crap. Frog Hopper Enthusiats. Coaster nerd shot!!! Just in case you forgot the name of the ride already. Hey look! "Pizza" finally has a real name! Bye. Bye Sea World. Thank you for making awesome rides and having lots of fish. Should Jon buy the chicken costume? To vote EMAIL DAN!! mrt0ad13@aol.com That's right bitches we are at Carrabbas! They even made the best pasta dish EVAR for us - Rigatoni Campagnolo. This dish is comarable to "kinky sex". It's THAT good! Gaarrrrr. Me. Eats. Rigatoni. Gaaaarrrrr! "They served Rigatoni Campagnolo at the last supper!" Hey everyone. I'm eating amazing Carrabbas mozzarella and you're not...SO THERE!!! Can everyone please EMAIL DAN and tell him - "TPR is at Carrabbas and you're at home watching porn! HAHAHAHA!!!". mrt0ad13@aol.com For LIVE UPDATES from this trip, follow us on our FaceBook Page! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

Today we will spend some time at Downtown Disney! Ooh. This could be fun. Awww...the Disney licensing people did not approve our new TPR t-shirt design. Next up was the candy store. Everything in here will kill Dan. So if Dan doesn't receive 100 emails from TPR readers we will force him to eat here. So if you want to SAVE DAN then EMAIL DAN!!! mrt0ad13@aol.com Mmmm. Chocolate covered strawberries and blue & creamy smurf cupcakes! Now you bite off Dori's head...just like you've always wanted to! My "make your own cookie" is in there somewhere. Do you see it? That's a peanut butter filled giant Oreo cookie dipped it dark chocolate covered in reese's pieces and peanut butter cups topped with dark chocolate drizzle! "This is much better than 'normal' sex!" Dinosaurs. Wacky drinks. Big food. This place rocks! Gaarrrrr! I'm angry t-Rex dude. Gimme some credit cards. The Cotton-Tini could be coolest drink ever made! If you work/worked at Cedar Point you are required to order this. Good thing America doesn't have an obesity problem! "Do you have asteroids?" "No but my dad had hemeroids once!". Are you ready for the Cotton-Tini? As the liquid death is poured the cotton candy dissolves into a pool of wonderful goo! Worship the cotton tini!!! BOW DOWN TO ITS GREATNESS!!! Illumigaytions will feature plenty of large goblets of beer! Can you spot Jeff Johnson in this picture? If you can...EMAIL DAN!!! mrt0ad13@aol.com I like fish...I like fish! The chicks to dudes ratio is pretty good so far for a theme park trip! Another airport run to pick up more cool people. Here is where we parked...just in case you were wondering. NOTED! "Ive got beer, toothpaste, and a towel...AND THATS ALL I NEED!!!" We ended the night with some of the best wings in the world. NOM! NOM! NOM!!!! But the service tonight SUCKED!!! Like really REALLY SUCKED! We even wrote them a note of encouragement. KidTums loves the Blazin' sauce! Although after four beers and an audios M F she was passed out COLD!! More photos coming soon! Add us on FaceBook for LIVE UPDATES!!! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

^ Whaaaaat? Don't you know that Elissa loooooves seafood??? "Yeah, hi do you have any fish that tastes like plain pasta or McDonalds hamburgers?"

Don't do this. Seriously. This is the last thing the park needs is to hear from some random person they don't know asking them "what's holding it up" as though they don't already know. Here's a thought...I'll bet the ride might get open faster if they didn't have to answer some pointless emails. --Robb

^ Email me your mailing address! You'll get THREE bags of crap!!!

Sorry, guys. This is an "invite only" trip where it's some of our closest friends and family getting together for a week to hang out in Orlando. More fun updates coming soon to TPR or check our FaceBook page for LIVE updates! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

^ He knows. He was on our 2009 Deep South trip to Dollywood. And Michael, to answer your question - it's mainly because it's an awesome park and we are in the area. And for people who did not do our Deep South trip this year, I think it adds a great park lineup for that trip. I mean, think about, when was the last time we visited this many "star attractions" in such a short period of time? --Robb

Day One - Arrival Day! Day Two - Downtown Disney & T-Rex Cafe Day Three - Sea World Orlando & Carrabba's! Day Four - Disney's Hollywood Studios & Mickey's Not-So-Scary Halloween Party! Day Five - An EPIC Epcot TPR Update! Day Six - Universal Orlando & Halloween Horror Nights Day Seven - IllumiGaytions, TPR House Party, and Blizzard Beach! Day Eight - Busch Gardens Tampa & Howl-O-Scream! TPR's "Official" HHN Update with more photos & a backstage tour VIDEO! ----------------------------------------------------------- Happy Halloween Theme Park Review! We are back in Orlando for our annual "Halloween in Orlando" trip! First off, we will be doing LIVE UPDATES on Facebook! So if you're not following us on FaceBook, ADD US NOW!!!! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey And here is Part 1 of our FaceBook Photo Album: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/albu ... =681415369 Onto some photos!!! Orlando 2009 - Illumigaytions: Reflextions of Piers We are in Orlando. This is Piers. He is gay. His reflex are brilliant! TPR Orlando tradition! Get off the plane and go to Waffle House! THIS is why Waffle House is amazing! My hash browns are "smothered, covered, chunked, peppered, and topped!" I'm CRAAAAZY hash browns eating dude! Gimme some jalapeño. And the coffee here kicks ass!!! (and yes I look disheveled because I haven't slept in a day and a half!) Every year TPR rents out a couple of these "vacation homes" and we hold a week long party of theme parks, nudity, alcohol, and copius amounts of gay sex! The early arrivers are here. When all is said and done there will be about thirty of us between the two houses. Soon the pool will be packed with half naked people! KidTums checks out the theater/game room. Piers has a prop for his Illumigaytions show! OH MY!!! This has to be the biggest Super Target I've ever seen! KidTums says "time to stock up on supplies for our week in Orlando!" We were spotted by a TPR fan at Target! Shout out to Robert and his Super Target! "It sure is bright in this section..." Should I use the "Fantastic Fruity" or "Creamsicle" during Illumigaytions: Reflextions of Piers? To, help me decide! EMAIL DAN! mrt0ad13@aol.com Ooh!!! Fudge!!! This is absolutely part of the show! Emily is not convinced that Robb's driving isn't going to end up in epic disaster. "We have the necessary supplies. Beer and ..." "...SHARKS!!!" In the game of "Choose your twin to make out with while the other commits horrible suicide", Emily chose Tyler because while she felt "he probably wouldn't be as caring or as sincere in bed, it will probably warp my mind for the rest of my life." Robby, on the other hand jumped in front of a bus and splattered "Final Destination 1 style." Beware!!! You are about to enter the TPR house! The TPR house is getting stocked up! The "princess room". I know a couple of guys who would fit PERFECTLY in here! This is the "Disney geeks" room. Nobody ever gets laid in here. Brad is queen #1? Who knew??? The TPR House should be Big Mike approved! Do you know who's room this is? If you do...EMAIL DAN!!! mrt0ad13@aol.com Joey's bed. KidTums is ready for Disney!!! Happy Halloween TPR! Get ready for lots of fun "Halloween in Orlando" updates! Remember, Add us on FaceBook for live Orlando 2009 updates! http://www.facebook.com/robbalvey

This was already kind of answered on page one:

^ If you have Express Passes, absolutely! If not, I think you'll find most houses will have between 60 to 90 minute lines on a Saturday night. --Robb

^ I would love to think that would be the case, but remember that Efteling wasn't the easiest park to get ERT at on the Europe 2008 trip. --Robb

^ I don't mean a screen record. That would look horrible. I meant the people who normally grab flash movies like the ones that have been posted before. --Robb

Is anyone able to grab the flash video and upload it to CoasterTube?

This has been answered many, many times. Stop being lazy!

^ A Dark Ride DVD is absolutely in the works! (But we'll save that discussion for another thread!) --Robb

And this is ALL gmoney's fault!!! Enjoy everyone (and say thank you to GJ for this!) http://sendables.jibjab.com/view/DCgY1573NBq4qMZt

Here is an interesting observation that I noticed when looking at the two guide books back to back. When I look at the Disneyland book from 1978 I think "Wow, this park looks VERY different today" but when I look at the Magic Kingdom book from I'm assuming the same time period, the park doesn't look as foriegn to me as the Disneyland one. And it really makes me think of how much Disneyland has totally changed in 30 years. Even in the 20 years since I originally worked at the park, I go to it today and think "this is not the park I once worked at in 1988." But Magic Kingdom on the other hand seems to have preserved itself a bit better. Many of the attractions I remember from the Disneyland of my youth are now gone (America Sings, Peoplemover, Country Bears, Rainbow Caverns Mine Train, Mission to Mars, Skull Island, Skyway, Inner Space, Circle Vision, etc) are now just memories, but aside from 20,000 Legues, Mickey Mouse Revue, Mr. Toad, Skyway and a couple of other minor things, my memories of Magic Kingdom from my youth are still pretty much intact today. I'm not sure if either is a good or bad thing, just an observation that I made. --Robb

The photos of Disneyland are seriously amazing and all, but I don't think anything can top this... Welcome back Shane! --Robb

^ Robin, thanks for that. Something to note though - a release of a RAW DVD would never impact any other series we are producing. CE 13 is still set to come out before the end of this year! --Robb