Morey's is the crown jewel of the New Jersey seaside parks. I was really looking forward to Morey's thanks to its reputation for having crazy flat rides, great dark rides, a beach-side CCI, a recently renovated SLC, and a lively atmosphere. And Morey's definitely delivered. I gave myself 6 or so hours, but wished I had given myself a full day since the park really does have a great lineup and the boardwalk between piers was littered with arcades, food, and every tourist activity you could think of.
The culmination of my Jersey Shore Tour finished with the crown jewel, Morey's Piers.
Consisting of three piers, all 3 piers had noticeably different attractions. I was shocked that each pier was a solid 10 minute walk between them. I always thought they'd be closer, but that allowed me to truly experience the atmosphere of Wildwood...and hear the tram rolling on by throughout the evening. Of the Piers, I liked Surfside Pier the best since it had 4 of the top 6 rides there (AtmosFEAR, Zoom Phloom, Great Nor'Easter, & "it"). Mariner's Pier was anchored by the Ghost Ship, but lacked the thrill rides of the other piers. Adventure Pier is home to the solid Great White and a ton of up-charges.
Surfside was the best of the piers in terms of the rides. It also seemed to have more of the newer rides there.
Mariner's was my least favorite of the piers but it had the most rides. The wheel and Sea Serpent dominate from a distance.
Adventure Pier had the upcharges like the Screamin' Swing.
And this messed up Boat Tag ride I had only seen previously at Knoebels.
While I expected the Great White to be the best coaster at Morey's, the coaster I was secretly most looking forward to was the Great Nor'Easter. Usually the three letters SLC send fear down an enthusiast's spine. But this one had recently undergone a multi-million dollar renovation that promised to provide a ride so smooth your grandmother could ride. Naturally I was skeptical since I've been abused by all too many SLCs, but this one did have the vest restraints so even if the ride still rode rough, I wouldn't get any hay makers to the head.
It's truly impressive that Morey's was able to squeeze a SLC onto the pier. The ride narrowly dodges water slides, the flume, and buildings. The only apparent modification was shifting the loading area to where the block brakes are on most SLCs. Because of the ride's tight fit and close interaction, the park enforces a strict no loose article policy. While Six Flags uses the honor system, Morey's goes full TSA with metal detectors and wanding. I don't mind in this instance since Morey's does provide free fluffy, fluffy bunnies filled with medicine and goo so I can tell it's genuinely in the interest of patron safety. Unfortunately the no loose article policy did prevent me from meeting up with boldikus since my phone was locked away when we tried to meet up by the ride.
So the 5 million dollar question- was the Great Nor'Easter smooth? I couldn't believe it but the answer was yes! At no point was the ride rough so I was actually able to enjoy the layout. The ride doesn't let up. In this case, that was a good thing. Normally it's just relentless punishment. The close calls with the ride's own track and nearby attractions heightened the ride's speed. All 5 inversions had really strong snap to them, in particular the final inline twists. I would still take every B&M invert over the Nor'Easter, but it's not far behind Silver Bullet. Surprisingly the SLC was my favorite coaster at the park. That is something I never thought I'd say unless it was at a park where the only other coaster was a Chance Toboggan. 8 out of 10
Would the Great'Nor Easter be great or beat me to a pulp like all other SLCs.
This one probably has the best setting and the interaction with everything is truly impressive.
Are those riders smiling on a SLC? It's a sign of the apocalypse.
Yes the renovation actually made a SLC smooth! I couldn't believe it.
When you aren't getting your skull destroyed, you have to admit SLCs have a really intense, action-packed layout.
Great White was a pretty good coaster as I had expected, but I think I expected it to be a little better than it was. The ride looks absolutely fantastic from a distance and it always brings a smile to my face to see a boardwalk woody. Great White is particularly noteworthy though since the ride extends beyond the boardwalk and actually stands atop sand for portions of it.
With two trains, the ride never was more than a 1 train wait. Despite two trains, they were being sent out rather slowly because of the most elaborate staple jobs I have ever seen from operators. Typically ops only staple by pushing the lap bar down as far as humanly possible. Morey's took it an extra step by tightening the seat belts to the max before jamming down the bars. The ops were bending over people and pinning the seat belt down to ensure it was tightened. After a few rides, I realized resistance was futile and just did it for them to save them some time.
The drop under the boardwalk was definitely unique. The thing that shocked me most was that the following turn was unbanked so the laterals were pretty strong there. The lift gave great views of the ocean. I didn't get any air in the first half thanks to the stapling, but there were some solid laterals. The return leg to the station had pretty good air though. I thought the layout reminded me a lot of Silver Comet. It's a fun coaster with a marvelous setting, but I just wish the restraints weren't quite so tight so I could appreciate the air a little more. 7 out of 10
Boardwalk woodies are great. The Great White is greater since it extends even further and goes right onto the beach.
The first half is turnaround heavy.
The second half has some nice air on the bunny hills. It also looked beautiful at sunset.
After one good Vekoma, could there actually be a second good one? Yes! Sea Serpent was surprisingly smooth for a boomerang. The first drop as usual packed quite the punch in the back and the inversions are very forceful. But the most memorable thing about Sea Serpent for me was how the ride is crammed into the boardwalk. I couldn't believe how there was a store/restaurant in the middle of the ride. 6 out of 10
Like the Great Nor'Easter, Sea Serpent surprisingly was not a Vekoma death machine.
Smooth and forceful. Usually boomerangs only do the latter.
Does the Morey's wheel always have those missing cars?
Doo Wopper is an ok wild mouse with an interesting theme. The fast food theming seems very carnivalish and reminded me of Primeval Whirl. While the theming didn't work for the latter, I think it worked well for Morey's since it was at a boardwalk as opposed to arguably the most well-themed, detail oriented resort out there. As far as wild mice go, the Zamperla ones are my least favorite. The turns are pretty brutal without braking and the drops are noticeably less steep than their Arrow, Mack, or Maurer brethren. Doo Wopper mitigated the first issue through extensive braking, which wasn't too bad since I could enjoy the view of the water. 5 out of 10
Doo Wopper was an ok mouse. The Zamperla ones aren't my favorites.
I'm pretty sure Six Flags would have called this McDonald's the Ride if they tried the same theme. It's all about sponsorship, right?
I was a Flitzer virgin as I entered Wildwood but by the end of the night Morey's had popped my cherry there. Flitzer definitely looks like a carnival ride from the minimalist supports to the facade to the compact layout. Despite each car only seating 1-2 riders, Morey's kept sending trains out every 20-30 seconds even though the ride seemed to lack the block brakes you find on newer coasters. The ride was smooth despite its compact nature, but the turns didn't have the force to them that I had expected. I knew the ride didn't have any real drops going in though. Overall it was quirky and moderately fun, but one ride was enough. 4 out of 10
Flitzer looks like the perfect carnival coaster in every way.
Time for the whipping boy of Morey's coaster collection, Rollie's Coaster. It truly has it all. Unnecessary restraints? Check. Why a simple galaxi/zyklon layout has cars with OSTRs is beyond me. An awful name? Check. This one really needs no explanations. Putrid capacity? Check. While the other coasters were all less than 5 minute waits, Rollie's Coaster managed to have a 15-20 minute queue. While that isn't a particularly long line, it is relative to everything else there. The ride itself wasn't as awful as I expected; it was just meh. It is smooth so the restraints don't cause any discomfort. The drops were ok, quick but no air. Then the helices were pretty forgettable. It was a pretty mediocre coaster dragged down even further by those OSTRs and its capacity. 3 out of 10
Only Pinfari could screw up a galaxi so badly that they put OSTRs on the ride.
Surprisingly it wasn't rough, but it wasn't all that good.
"it" was one of those flats that I always heard about. Morey's took a standard frisbee ride, but replaced the OSTRs with lap bars and ran a very long cycle. While frisbee rides don't have any headbanging, the added freedom from the lap bars was fantastic and made the airtime feel that much more pronounced. While smaller than maXair, I think that cycle combined with the lap bars have vaulted it atop my list for best frisbee rides. 10 out of 10
I could handle "it".
Fatty couldn't handle "it". This is one of the best signs I've seen at a park!
Seriously the lap bars made a huge difference along with the crazy long cycle.
The flat I was most looking forward to was AtmosFEAR. After the false promise of Gillian's Larson/ARM tower, I was able to get my fill at Morey's Piers. These towers have an absolutely terrifying drop and kick the butts of tower 2-3 times its height. I still can't believe how much air there is during the full length of the drop. But the real differentiater for AtmosFEAR is the setting. The views of the boardwalk and Atlantic Ocean were breathtaking. I also loved the sound effects. I didn't get them on my first ride, but I got them on my second ride at night. The effects made the ascent more nerve-racking and also prevented me from hearing the "giveaway" that proceeds the drop. This was probably my favorite ride at Morey's. 10 out of 10
Absolutely terrifying. Drops like a rock and I thought the vehicle would plunge right through the boardwalk.
The sound effects were much better than expected. They hid the "giveaway" that precedes the drop.
I had heard very good things about Zoom Phloom but didn't realize just how good this flume would be. Going in I knew the flume had a pretty long elevated portion and had close interactions with the water slides and Great Nor'Easter. Zoom Phloom delivered that and much much more. What I didn't know was that Zoom Phloom had a section below the boardwalk and had two drops larger than those you'd find on most flumes. Both drops were excellent and very zippy. Finding some riders to join took a few minutes since I rode it earlier in the afternoon before the piers started getting more crowded at night, but it was worth the wait. Zoom Phloom really is the perfect flume and I can't believe they could fit a ride that long onto the boardwalk. After the insane drop tower, this was probably my favorite ride at Morey's. 10 out of 10
Zoom Phloom exceeded all of my expectations. I can't believe they fit a ride like this on the boardwalk.
The big drop.
The "small" drop which is still bigger than the big drop on most flumes out there. It leads to the awesome section below the boardwalk.
Morey's also had dark rides galore. Dante's Dungeon was the first one I tried and it was solid. Like the one I rode at Gillian's earlier in the day, Dante's Dungeon was well maintained so the scares didn't look tacky like those you find at carnival dark rides. There were a ton of gags, but none of them in particular stood out. 7 out of 10
Dante's Dungeon had an awesome facade.
Unfortunately Pirates of Wildwood was closed. I heard this was a must so I was bummed. I guess I'll find out next time if it's because it's really that good or if it's so bad that it's good.
Closed so I guess I'll have to wait until next time to see why people said this ride was a must in a visit to Wildwood.
Chamber of Checkers was the most messed up ride on the pier. First I hope you aren't scared of clowns. The demonic looking clown has blood red eyes and you enter through his mouth. The whole attraction was WTF. The first room was definitely interesting and would suck if you had an awful memory with all the fake pathways. Then the outside seemed unfinished. Does the outdoor portion typically only consist of metal chain link fences? There wasn't really any challenge and it just looked tacky, so it was perfect for Wildwood. I didn't find the maze too hard, but I left the attraction dumbfounded. 5 out of 10
The entrance was freaky and the walkthrough was just so WTF.
Ghost Ship was a walkthrough I didn't know much about before arriving and I was absolutely surprised how well done it was. Ghost Ship is more or less a permanent haunt you'd see at a park around Halloween. Not only does the ship have outstanding detail, but the ride had a good amount of scare actors who genuinely seemed to take pleasure trying to scare the poop out of you. The thing that most shocked me is that the scare actors were allowed (yes you read that right) to touch the guests. I have never seen a haunt that allowed it before and that made it all the more frightening. The whole attraction was pretty long too, probably about 10-15 minutes. I'm glad I saved this for the night since it heightened the eeriness of the ship. 10 out of 10
Ghost Ship was outstanding. It's more or less a permanent Halloween-style haunt.
Read the second warning. Yes you read that right. The actors can touch you. My draw dropped when I read that.
Morey's really came alive after the sun went down. All 3 piers had extensive lighting packages on all of the rides. This combined with the busy piers gave the park an energy level I haven't seen many parks match. My camera struggled to capture the beauty of Morey's at night. I tried but the only way to truly experience it is to go yourself.
My favorite lighting package was on AtmosFEAR.
All of the blur.
The Sea Serpent sign looked pretty intimidating at night.
Even the most basic of rides looked great at night.
A visit to Morey's Piers is more than just the rides. It also includes the massive Wildwood boardwalk. Since I only had the evening, I only had time for one meal. The decision came down to Mack's or Sam's. Based on this forum's recommendation, that meal was at Mack's. I went with a basic slice of cheese pizza and thought it was good, not great. I wouldn't object to eating it in a return visit, but I also may look to try somewhere else. That somewhere else may be Grab a Wiener for reasons I don't think I need to explain on this board. That's such an awesome name!
This name is very fitting for the Jersey Shore.
After the food, arcades are the second most abundant businesses on the boardwalk. I saw many modern arcades with games similar to what I'd see at Dave & Buster's, but eventually I stumbled upon an old-fashioned classic arcade in the Boardwalk Mall. I had no idea the place even existed prior to my visit, but while I may not return to Mack's the next time I'm in Wildwood, I will definitely be returning here. Unfortunately I don't have photos of the inside since they had a sign restricting photos, but the inside was a treasure chest for gamers. I found lines of pinball machines that emptied my pockets of all my loose change. They also had a lot of the older games I used to find at local arcades before blown up versions of apps like Crossy Road and Candy Crush started taking over every arcade near me.
I wasn't in this mall for shopping; I was there for the old-fashioned arcade.
No way I could stop in this arcade after finding all the pinball machines and classics in the Boardwalk Mall.
There were other things such as water parks, Ripley's museums, and laser tag. Though the most interesting thing I saw was beach zorbing. How does that even work? Do you literally get in the giant hamster ball and ram into others or just roll around mindlessly? I didn't get a chance to see anyone doing it but I'd love to people watch that activity during a return visit.
Beach zorbing looked interesting.
After I left, I was hoping to sneak a ride on the coasters at Steel Pier before going to sleep since my hotel was only 15 minutes from Atlantic City and I saw on the site they were sometimes open until 1 depending on the crowd levels. I tried calling the park but of course no one answered. Being a coaster whore I had to try to get that kiddie credit and generic spinning mouse. Having never been to Atlantic City, I felt a little uncomfortable there after midnight. I parked on a random side street behind the Hard Rock Cafe, prayed I wouldn't run into anyone, and then made a beeline for the park only to find the lights turning off. Sure enough it was closing. Instead of lingering around, I hightailed it back to my car and got out of that city as quickly as possible. So unfortunately for you that means no photos.
Great update and some incredible photos! Glad you liked Moreys overall and still bummed we couldnt link up. Love hearing others first time visits to my home away from home. While GreatAdv is technically closer I really consider Moreys to be my main home park as its where I grew up going all the time, and now with my folks living just a short walk away I'm always there. Your report is making me want to go this weekend!
Glad to see "IT" lived up to the hype - that thing is insane. Nice to see you managed to get into the Boardwalk Mall - that whole place is strange and if you're into classic arcade games the basement is where its at. Interesting tidbit: the guy that runs that arcade and owns all the games is this eccentric named Randy thats locally famous in Wildwood and even appeared on a episode of Hoarders. I'm certain he was hanging around in there while you were there, as he always is. He'll scream at you if you take photos or videos of anything. (I'm not kidding)
Speaking of arcades, you totally should not have skipped Gateway 26 (across from Surfside) - fantastic arcade with a mix of new and old, and the only place I can find anymore that still has $.25 crane machines (my favorite - and they probably have 100 of them). It's so huge in there you can get lost, and its also one of the only boardwalk businesses that stay open all year. I've been in there totally alone on Christmas Day, cleaning out their cranes.
I've noticed the extreme stapling on Great White and it is a new thing. They've always a been a little overzealous but my rides that same weekend they were really squeezing us in there. Not sure what thats all about but didnt take anything away from it. I'm a little disappointed you found the ride a bit of a letdown, as while its certainly not the greatest woodie, I find it to be running fantastically and a good bit faster since the retracking over the 2015/16 winter. Did you ride it at night? In the back? The first half of the ride is definitely about laterals but in the rear I typically get some really great air down the drop out of the station, the big drop, and the drop into the bunnyhops. The setting and I'm sure some nostalgia play a big part in why I love it so much.
Canobie Coaster wrote:But the most memorable thing about Sea Serpent for me was how the ride is crammed into the boardwalk. I couldn't believe how there was a store/restaurant in the middle of the ride. 6 out of 10
And bathrooms and guest services! The way Moreys manages to squeeze stuff in is truly something to marvel at.
Canobie Coaster wrote:Does the Morey's wheel always have those missing cars?
Yes, usually. No idea why.
Canobie Coaster wrote:Though the most interesting thing I saw was beach zorbing. How does that even work? Do you literally get in the giant hamster ball and ram into others or just roll around mindlessly?
We've sat and watched these and it seems a little bit of both. It's fun to watch but I don't know if I'd ever spend the $20 or whatever it is to try it. I've been told the insides are hot and smelly, further solidifying my decision to try them.
Canobie Coaster wrote:The decision came down to Mack's or Sam's. Based on this forum's recommendation, that meal was at Mack's. I went with a basic slice of cheese pizza and thought it was good, not great.
Sad face. I get it though, Macks is just too amazing for some people. Next time try Sams or Franconis, they may be mediocre enough for you.
I only got evening/night rides on Great White. I rode it twice in the front and twice in the back. Of the two seats, I think I preferred the front by a slight margin. I did enjoy the coaster, just not as much as I thought I would. The setting was great, but compared to the other CCIs I've been on, the air didn't seem nearly as strong.
I'll have to check out Gateway 26 next time I'm down there. I love crane machines but am morally against paying $1-2 per attempt since I know I'll lose. I think the only time I ever won a crane machine was at Quassy since the entire machine only had like 2 animals in it so I had a clear, unobstructed shot. Though the new machines really frustrate me how the crane will randomly open up even if you manage to grab onto something.
I'm really impressed the retro arcade was still there. I really wanted to take photos of the place to give them some added publicity but respected the guy's sign. I'm just thankful the sign was there. I've been paranoid about taking photos at parks/entertainment complexes after a security guard questioned me last year for taking a photo of a building from the unnamed park's midway and subsequently had me delete those photos from my phone.
Sesame Place is arguably one of the most expensive stops for credit whores. With a $70 gate price and another $18 for parking, visiting Sesame Place is a badge of shame. That is unless you have a SeaWorld/Busch Gardens Platinum Pass...which I admittedly do not have. So feel free to judge me for this visit. I did find discounted tickets but Sesame Place still was much higher than it should have been for the amount of time I spent there. I always said I would never stoop so low to venture to Sesame Place until I have kids, but I had an hour to burn before Clementon opened and Sesame Place was within driving range so I broke my rule.
Until last year I always thought Sesame Place would have been awkward to visit without any kids. However, last year I visited New England's two kids parks alone in Santa's Village and Story Land and had a really good time since those parks are well-themed and adults are accommodated on almost every attraction. From the website and the few trip reports I've seen, Sesame Place seemed similar in that regard. So I bit the bullet and was the creepy guy who went to Sesame Place alone. Is it odd? Yes I would say that. I was the only person I saw in the entire park without any kids. But I don't think I got any odd looks from staff members or other patrons (or if I did they kept it to themselves).
The universal symbol of credit whoring.
Despite getting there just 10 minutes after opening, Sesame Place already seemed very crowded. I had to park much further away in the lot than I expected and I could see waves of people walking into the park. I had a game plan for the park. Ride Vapor Trail, ride Sky Splash, and take photos for the Park Index all in less than an hour. Ultimately I was successful despite hitting longer lines than anticipated that close to opening.
My first stop was of course going to be the credit, Vapor Trail. Conveniently located right next to the entrance for all you credit whores out there, Vapor Trail is actually a custom roller skater which is about the only reason I could justify the visit. I was expecting there to be no line, but I actually had to wait about 20 minutes since the ride seemed to be the first stop for many families and it had painfully slow dispatches. I was able to get on a train earlier since they had an open seat in the back and (not) surprisingly I was the only person in line who wasn't a family of 3 or more. How lucky was I getting the best seat in the house on the park's marquee attraction.
While Vapor Trail has no real drops (the first one's angle of descent is so gradual that it was barely anything), it does have 3 good helices. I s**t you not but I actually started to grey out a bit in that first helix which really took me by surprise. It's like the unsuspecting helix at the beginning of Backlot that has no business doing something like that. The next two helices were considerably tamer, but the whole ride was quite smooth and a pretty fun ride. I'm not going to be forking over admission to Big Bird again anytime soon to ride it again, but it is a very good family coaster and I'm always happy when parks opt for unique layouts as opposed to the carbon copied layouts. 6 out of 10
Dear Sesame Place, thank you for placing Vapor Trail next to the entrance. Sincerely, every credit whore low enough to visit this park.
No joke. The first helix actually did start to cause me to see grey which it had no business doing.
One helix of death after another.
You can kind of see the first drop on the right. It's no Skyrush to put it lightly.
Note the age demographic in line. It's exactly what you would expect.
After Vapor Trail, the other ride I wanted to hit was Sky Splash, the park's family raft slide. Most famous for having the giant rubber ducky towering over the slide, Sky Splash is a very interesting slide. Sky Splash is the park's tallest attraction by a pretty wide margin and I probably waited 15-20 minutes for the slide, which wasn't bad considering it is also located at the front of the park.
I can safely say that I've never been on a slide quite like Sky Splash. It's one part lazy river, one part water slide, and one part river rapids ride. The first section is a very tame series of turns, but about halfway down the slide you splash into a pool, hence the name Sky Splash. The park used these two splash pools as a pseudo block braking system to up the ride's capacity which was really cool as I had never seen anything like that before on a water slide. The entry into each of these pools sent a wave of water cascading into the raft like you experience on a river rapids ride. On the way down the slide, there are several well themed sprinklers that are sure to get you even wetter such as an oversized shower head.
The part of the slide that really shocked me was the finale. After the last splash pond, there's a pretty large double down. I wasn't expecting this slide to have a large drop going in so that was already a pleasant surprise. What was even better was that the drop was surprisingly fast and forceful. The first drop built up quite a bit of speed and the second one actually gave some airtime which completely caught me off-guard. As far as family raft slides go, Sky Splash is definitely one of the best ones out there for its uniqueness and great drop at the end. I would highly recommend checking this slide out if you do find yourself at Sesame Place. 8 out of 10
Sky Splash is a very well themed water slide. It also features the park's iconic supersized rubber ducky.
The ride features two of these splash ponds that serve as pseudo block brakes, hence the name Sky Splash.
I kid you not, this double down actually had very good airtime on the second drop.
While walking around, I did see one interesting flat in the Honker Dinger Derby so I broke my plan somewhat and opted for a ride. Honker Dinger Derby (I'm just calling it HDD instead of that ridiculous name) was one of those orbiter rides. While run a bit slower than the ones I see at my local carnivals, this one ran a pretty long cycle since kids seem to have a higher tolerance for spinning than adults. These are one of my favorite types of spinning rides out there so finding one at Sesame Place was a pleasant surprise. 7 out of 10
No clue what a Honker Dinger Derby is but this is a pretty fun spinner.
90% of the park's mechanical rides are located in the park right corner of the park. The only exception is the Vapor Trail coaster at the front of the park (I swear the park knows how to cater to us credit whores). While the ride collection seemed pretty standard, the park did a very good job theming each one individually to a different Sesame Street character. Most of the flats looked to be about a 1 cycle wait.
Captain Cookie's High C's Adventure is a bit of a mouth full to say.
I'm not kidding that the park custom themed all of their flats. That's a seriously big thumbs up from me.
Blast Off was a cute looking drop tower. While a kiddie ride at most places, this was one of the park's tallest rides.
Lucky Elmo got two rides themed to him. This one being Elmo's Cloud Chaser.
Whoops I may have spoken too soon. Elmo has 2.5 rides themed after him.
Flyin' Fish looked a lot like the One Fish, Two Fish ride minus the water sprayers and infectious song.
I skipped this one, but the Zamperla balloon rides are amazing. Those tubs are super easy to spin.
The totally groovy tea cup ride.
I just can't get over how well themed each flat ride was.
Every horse on the carousel was themed to something from Sesame Street.
Sesame Place is compact, but it has one of the weirdest layouts I've seen. The central midway is completely wide open and empty (it's also blue but that's an entirely different point). I believe they do this for the parades. This results in all of the rides and attractions being tucked away in corners of the park off the midway. I also found it odd how Sesame Place didn't have a designated water park area like most parks, but rather they mixed the slides in with the ride section. It makes sense considering the park is pressed for space, but still it did have an odd feel. In one area you'd see a water slide, but right next to it you'd see a spinning ride or a roller coaster. Whatever works for the park, but I can't think of another park that has a layout quite like it.
This is the park's main midway. It's very blue and wide open.
Slide up above, tiny little train ride down below with an emphasis on tiny.
I don't think I've ever seen a tube slide this small before.
I know most of this report was spent making fun of myself for being a credit whore, but all kidding aside Sesame Place is a nice park...if you're their target audience. The whole park was immaculate and very well themed. All of the rides were kid-friendly and also accommodating for adults at the same time. I really appreciated how the park took what would have been standard rides and custom themed all of them to different Sesame Street characters as opposed to just placing little bits of theming in the queue lines. I can't see myself coming back unless they add another custom coaster or I have kids (I know the latter will happen someday, but that's a loooong way off) simply because of the price and the other parks nearby.
OK so I always say Moreys and Great Adv are my home parks but really the two closest parks are Clementon and Sesame Place.
I haven't been to either because all I ever hear is how much of a sh*thole Clementon is (the parks lineup isnt doing itself any favors either) and Sesame my sister always seems to forget to hit me up when she's taken the nephew and I absolutely refuse to go alone. Especially wandering around alone and taking pictures. LMAO!
But kudos to you for being a braver (and possibly creepier) man than me.
^ I can confirm Clementon is a complete and total dump. Just wait for that report. It's going to be a doozy. I have never been to a park that has been that empty on a perfectly sunny weekend day. When that happens, you know something is seriously wrong. I am shocked you've never made the trek to Clementon at least once since they do have a custom wooden coaster that may or may not try to kill you if you sit in the wrong seat.
It's probably especially bad since I had a beard and everything. I like to think of myself as a big kid. Granted sometimes places just view me as a creep. Like who would have thought it would have been creepy to try and go into Chuck E. Cheese's alone to play pinball while waiting for a bus? Turns out you need to have a kid if you're over the age of 18. In some ways, I am kind of shocked Sesame Place doesn't have a rule like that but in this case it worked to my advantage.
Sesame Street isn't a half-bad park... if it's not too busy. Otherwise, it's a friggin' nightmare to navigate and to ride anything.
I remember going back when I was a kid and loving it. When I visited with the family late last year during their Halloween season, I couldn't get out of there fast enough. But the kids enjoyed it, and that's what was important.
Looking forward to the Clementon report, one of the few area parks I still haven't checked out either.
That coaster dad  and that coaster kiddo .Road trip buddies for life. Dad's faves: Fury 325. Phantom's Revenge. Intimidator 305. El Toro. Skyrush. Kiddo's faves: Banshee. Top Thrill Dragster. Valravn. Apollo's Chariot. Twisted Timbers.
I have a feeling if I wasn't there right after opening, I could have been waiting in a decent sized line for Vapor Trail and Sky Splash.
The park nails everything they need to for their targeted demographic which is what's important. Every kid I saw there was having an absolute blast. I just found that the two kid-focused parks in New England (Story Land and Santa's Village) had more rides that could be enjoyed by adults than Sesame Place. I could spend a day at either of those two parks and have a great time, but I'd struggle to spend a whole day at Sesame Place.
Funplex is a gigantic family entertainment center that I had on my radar for the past year. It had all the makings of a perfect pit stop- right off a major highway, free admission, and an adult-sized credit. After leaving Sesame Place, I stopped in at the Funplex for a total of 15 minutes. Honestly the most time I spent was trying to figure out how to get out of their labyrinth of a parking lot. Actually the parking lot wasn't a labyrinth. I was just a blind idiot and couldn't see the exit signs anywhere.
Half the property is a humongous indoor arcade. Most of the games look to be of the newer variety and something you'd find at Dave and Buster's. They also have a decently large bowling alley (though they have big ball bowling instead of my beloved candlepin). There's also a food area that the park probably gets good business from since they restrict outside food and drink. That's something I haven't seen much at arcades/FECs.
This is my type of casino. Who needs Vegas for anything but roller coasters and buffets? That may be the most ACE thing I've ever said.
Bowling with balls that big is a foreign concept for me.
The other half is an outdoor ride park that reminded me a lot of Quassy. They have a collection of SBF rides (including the same mini inverting frisbee), some classic spinning rides, and a tiny water park.
Fun Twister is one of those bonkers mini inverting frisbees. The hang time over the top on these is fantastic if its anything like Quassy's.
The always classic Tilt-a-Whirl.
Fun Force. Yes everything here basically has "fun" before it since it's fun.
Guess I won't be riding Free Fall today.
The water park seems like the Funplex's newest addition. The slides aren't tall but they offer both body and raft slides.
But the main event (for coaster enthusiasts at least) is the Fun Coaster. Everything at this park had "fun" in the name which automatically makes it fun. While at first this may look like your standard spinning wild mouse, there's one major difference, the manufacturer. Instead of being from Zamperla or Reverchon, this one is from our good friends over at SBF. I only bought a single ticket for the coaster and it set me back $6.
While less popular than the Zamperla or Reverchon ones, I honestly found the SBF version to be slightly better. The turns were a little slower but that also eliminated the uncomfortable sections plaguing the other models. The drops were just ok, but the spinning was pretty good, probably because I had the whole car to myself so it was definitely off balanced.
Looks like this will be a long wait.
The second hill looks very wrong but it's surprisingly smooth.
An overview of the coaster.
Based on the newer rides present at the Funplex, I think it's same to say the park has been doing quite well. Along with the arcade, water slides, and rides, they also had a mini golf course as well. I hope to see them keep growing into something larger as the facility is very well kept and has a large variety of attractions already.
As a theme park enthusiast, you never want to see a park fail. There's nothing like the energy of an amusement park. Seeing the coasters fly by, hearing the screams of riders, and seeing the excitement on everyone's faces. However, if someone put a gun to my head and said that one park needed to be eliminated, I may very well pick Clementon. Everything about the park seemed ghetto and off.
Is that a first aid symbol above the T? Maybe that was a sign...
Usually when you approach parks, there's plenty of signage. Whether it be billboards or signs off the highway. For Clementon, there was zilch, nothing, nada. As my GPS took me through town, I was getting a little worried whether or not my GPS brought me to the right place. But after a quick turn, I finally saw the water slides and entered into what may be one of the worst parks I have visited.
Splash World had way more people than the ride section. And as you can see Splash World wasn't exactly bustling. This was on a 90 degree, sunny weekend day too.
The park almost felt like the aftermath of a zombie apocalypse. Actually I think it was the aftermath of the zombie apocalypse. When I visit parks, I never want to deal with lines. But there's also something unnerving when you can look down the entire midway of a park on a sunny weekend day and see no one. I honestly thought all of the rides were closed when I arrived, but they were really that empty that the rides didn't even have riders to start them up. I honestly think the park had a 2-3 employee to park guest ratio on the day I visited.
Anyone in green is an employee. I think the park had a 3:1 employee to park guest ratio.
I'll start with the park's saving grace, Thunder Drop. Despite only being 90ft tall, Thunder Drop is one of those crazy ARM/Larson towers that are more terrifying than S&S towers that are 2-3 times this ride's height. This one was extra terrifying since I wasn't sure if the brakes would engage after seeing the state of everything else in the park. As usual the drop was intense and provided fantastic ejector air the whole way down. On some of the larger towers, I can't notice too much of a difference after a certain height, but in this case I could. Still this was easily my favorite ride in the park. As a side note, I love how the ride still says Super Shot above each and every seat even though it's called Thunder Drop. 9 out of 10
What a cute little drop tower.
Don't let the cuteness fool you, this ride is intense.
The sign says it's Thunder Drop.
The vehicle says otherwise.
Along with the woodie and the drop tower, the other ride I was looking forward to was the flume since it was built over the lake. Unfortunately like Zoom Phloom I was greeted with a sign "No Single Riders". Usually that just means I have to awkwardly ask a family to join them. However, Clementon saved me that awkward moment since there wasn't a single soul to ask. I watched empty log after empty log float down the trough. After about 10 minutes I saw a guy stroll into the queue. The dude was alone and smelled like booze, but desperate situations call for desperate measures and that guy became my new best friend for all of 3 minutes. We had a jolly ole time on the flume. I enjoyed the scenic views of the brown lake while my good friend sat in back rapping to himself.
King Neptune's Revenge (cool name but zero theming with it) was cool in the fact that a majority of the layout situated over the water. I still prefer flumes that hug the terrain but it's nice to have a change of pace every once and a while. The ride had two drops with the first one being so short that it barely qualifies as one in my book. While flumes are usually relatively smooth other than some bumps around the turns, Clementon somehow managed to get their logs to jackhammer as you crest the lift hill. How every other flume gracefully crests the lift and Clementon's butchers this transition is a true feat. Maybe it was intentional to distract you from the brown water that you plunge into? The second drop was decently tall but the angle of descent wasn't very steep. One ride was enough since I had to break off my newfound friendship, but it was a solid flume outside of the weird vibrating thing before the drops. 7 out of 10
The flume is built almost entirely over the crystal clear water of Lake Clementon.
Note the excited riders.
These were the only other riders I saw on the flume all day.
Now the primary reason any enthusiast would visit this dump of a park would be for the S&S woodie, Tsunami. Sorry I mean J2. Actually I mean Hell Cat. When I arrived, at the park and didn't see the ride run, I figured it just had slow dispatches. When I still didn't see it run after 10 minutes, I was worried the ride was down. Surely the park wasn't that empty that its only roller coaster had no one in the queue? Actually it was exactly that.
Is it even open? The park's star attraction surely can't have no one riding it, can it? Actually that's precisely it.
I was greeted by a laughably long queue line. I am going to go off on a limb and guess that line has never been filled once in the entire time the ride has been there. Atop the stairs right before the station is a wonderful little sign warning riders that Hell Cat is riding "extremely aggressive today." The only other park I have heard having a sign like that is Mt. Olympus. Anytime you can be compared to Mt. Olympus is probably a red flag.
Nothing blocking the queue, so I guess it's open. It's funny the park thinks they need that many switchbacks.
In hell cats are half feline, half plane.
The next minute was probably the weirdest experience I have ever had boarding a coaster. When I reached atop the stairs, I walked over to the front row. What few reports I have heard about the park warned how violent the ride was, so I sure as heck wasn't going to mess with the back for my first ride. The employee opened the air gate, watched as I buckled my seat belt and pulled down my restraint, and then poked my lap bar almost as if he was testing whether or not a pot on the stove was hot or not. At this point, I came to the realization that the employees were totally silent and hadn't even read off the standard safety spiel. Actually I couldn't recall hearing a word uttered by any employee at the park thus far. This furthered my thoughts I was experiencing a zombie apocalypse. Before dispatching, the two ops looked at each other, gave a thumbs up, and I was off on my journey to hell.
The first drop is still one of the steepest on any wooden coaster, a fact that becomes even more impressive when you realize most of the woodies ahead of it are RMCs or Intamins. As the train crested the hill, I felt a trim hold the train back with all its might. "Uh oh. Trims on the first drop usually mean the ride is rou..." Before I could finish that thought, the train shuffled as it ascended the large second hill. This hill did give a good pop of air and gave a nice view of the lake. It's probably the most photogenic feature of the ride. The middle of the ride is much like the Voyage's turnaround only it tracks as well as scooter over a cobblestone road. There was one hidden drop that gave a powerful moment of ejector air, but the turns shuffled pretty badly. In front, it was tolerable but in the back...well I'll get to that. The finale had 2-3 hills that gave solid pops of air and this was actually really smooth since it's the one part of the ride that doesn't push the envelope in terms of intensity. It wasn't painful and did have some good air sprinkled throughout. I would have loved to ride this the opening year pre-trim brake since I could have seen this easily being a 9/10 or 10/10 kind of ride if it was smooth at the start. From my front seat ride, I'd give Hell Cat a 7 out of 10.
When I got back to the station, I asked the ops if I could ride again. They looked at the queue line, which was empty so I figured I could stay on. They then shook their heads. Why look back at the queue line then ? Anyway I walked down the exit ramp and was greeted with a bag check station? Hell Cat's queue causes you to leave the ride park and it dumps you off in the picnic grove area. So in order to re-enter the ride area, you need to pass through the bag check area again. Really Clementon, you couldn't have routed the exit to actually be inside the park? This is truly something special here.
Being an idiot, I decided to try Hell Cat in the second to back seat. I may be stupid, but I wasn't going for the holy grail of torture in the back seat. I figured I could give myself the luxury of avoiding a wheel seat. Again the ops silently and daintily checked my restraint and then I was off. The first drop, even though it was braked the first half, gave a pretty good pop of air once the trim disengaged. I really wish I could have experienced that drop unaltered. Then the pain began. I have been on some bad coasters such as Predator and Mean Streak in the very back, but Hell Cat passed all of them. After the first drop, there wasn't a single moment where the train wasn't violently shaking. When I finally hit the brake run, there was great relief. Other than the worst SLC, I honestly can't think of a single coaster ride I have had that comes close to rivaling Hell Cat. Most rough woodies don't sustain their speed like Hell Cat, which just amplified the roughness. I shudder to think how bad the very back would have been, but if you want to find that out you're a braver man than me. From my back seat ride, I'd give Hell Cat a hellish rating of 1 out of 10
Oh how I wish I could have experienced this drop pre-trim brake.
The second hill is really picturesque and gives a great view of the lake.
The return leg had some good air.
Is this a mirage? It's actually a train. The only one I saw dispatched without myself in the hour I was there.
I would have cried if I had mistimed this photo.
This ride is absolute hell if you aren't in the front. It tracks about as poorly as any woodie I've ridden.
The park has a few other standard flats such as a Wave Swinger, Sea Dragon, and Ring of Fire. It was tricky to get their flats in action since each of them probably ran once every 15-20 minutes. I didn't try any rides other than the 3 listed above, but managed to grab a few photos.
I think this is what constitutes a full load for Clementon.
I had to look hard to spot the rider.
Sorry I forgot, Clementon had two coasters.
I'm glad I got an amazing discount for this park through Club TPR/Tickets at Work (it was half off!) since I would have felt ashamed paying full price for the park. I didn't go into the water park since I wanted to get out as soon as possible to ensure I was at Hershey for the start of the twilight ticket at 5. I always love Hershey, but after Clementon, Hershey looked even better.
I think there's a good park hidden somewhere in Clementon. Hellcat could be a really good wooden coaster with some TLC based on the accounts I remember hearing during its initial year. The park just needs to improve their operations and overall friendliness in order to take the next step.
These pages are in no way affiliated with nor endorsed by SeaWorld Parks & Entertainment, Cedar Fair, Legoland, Merlin Entertainment, Blackstone, Tussaud's Group, Six Flags, Universal Theme Parks, the Walt Disney Company or any other theme park company.
photos and videos on this website were taken with the permission of the park by
a professional ride photographer.
For yours and others safety, please do not attempt to take photos or videos at
parks without proper permission.
You need a sense of humor to view our site,
if you don't have a sense of humor, or are easily offended, please turn back
Most of the content on this forum is suitable for all ages. HOWEVER! There may be some content that would be considered rated "PG-13." Theme Park Review is NOT recommended for ages under 13 years of age.