Six Flags Magic Mountain
Emily hates Six Flags.
I thought the issue was that I took her to the worst of the worst. In the past year, I took her to Darien Lake, Discovery Kingdom, and Great Escape. And she’s sick of Six Flags New England since I’ve dragged her to that park too often.
I had the best day I’ve ever had at Magic Mountain. The park was an absolute ghost town. And the park does an excellent job with Holiday in the Park. As for Emily? She still hates Six Flags.
I’m admittedly blinded by the coaster lineup (and the sparkling lights), but Emily took issue with the inefficient ops (fair, most things ran one train), park layout (fair, the Helpful Honda Express was closed), terrible food (fair, it didn’t seem fresh), and parts of the park smelling like raw sewage (fair, it did).
Our day began with YOLOcoaster. It was a foreign experience for me to see that ride as a walk-on. And this was with it running just one-train (this was a theme for the day).
Me- Love the first and second halves. Not a big fan of the pause in-between. 8 out of 10
Emily- “Short, but sweet.” Thumbs Up
We then rode one of the most underwhelming hypercoasters in existence in Goliath. While most hyper coasters focus on airtime, Goliath hardly has any. The only real bit of airtime is the third hill.
Me- It’s fun, but bad by hypercoaster standards. 6 out of 10
Emily- Not a fan of the helix of death. Thumbs Down
We then planned to ride Twisted Colossus, but it was having technical issues. This ride hates me. I’ve had it close early for the RMC Recall of 2016 and open 7 hours late in 2018. But I always do get to ride it, just not as much as I’d like.
So instead, we hiked up Samurai Summit to Ninja. This wasn’t exactly the walk Emily wanted to make a day after hiking Multnomah Falls, but the path around the mountain was closed due to construction on their “new-for-2019” attraction.
Speaking of West Coast Racers, we visited in mid-December and it was closed. The most activity we saw were water dummies sitting in the trains. But the twisted layout looks cool and I’m sure I’ll be back.
Ninja is one of the last suspended coasters. It’s probably the worst Arrow suspended outside of Vampire, but I make a point to ride it since there are so few left.
Me- A few good swings, but it feels much slower than the posted speed. 6 out of 10
Emily- “Not worth the hike, but an ok ride.” Thumbs Sideways
I thought Apocalypse was still closed, but it was actually open. Better, it had been recently retracked! It’s no secret the ride had become a jackhammering disaster in recent years.
Me- Amazing sense of speed, some good pops of airtime, and smooth. 8 out of 10
Emily- “Best coaster in the park!” Double Thumbs Up
* These were our thoughts if we rode on the left. The operator on the right was brutally stapling riders. I have a bruise from my last ride when the operator jammed the restraint down so far, I was physically unable to push it down any further to unlock it after the ride. The operator had to do it for me.
Tatsu was magical during Holiday in the Park. Seeing all the lights while you twirl through the air was breathtaking. Tatsu really has one of the best settings of any coasters.
Me- The pretzel loop is insane and the rest of the layout is action-packed too. 9 out of 10
Emily- “Great until I thought I’d have an aneurysm (during the pretzel loop).” Thumbs Down
I wasn’t sure if Emily would actually ride X2. She hates rough rides and she won’t touch SFNE’s Joker with a 10-foot pole. I warned her it was bouncy and had flipping seats, but she decided to give it a whirl.
Me- X2 is nuts. This coaster does things other coasters shouldn’t. It’s absolutely insane and I think the elements even crazier. It’s just not perfect because it is bouncy. 9.5 out of 10
Emily- When I saw Emily crying mid-ride, I felt like a jerk. She hated X2, just not for the reason I expected. She actually found it smooth and liked the motions. So why was she crying? The restraints. She didn’t feel secure and felt like she was going to fall out. Double Thumbs Down
Emily still needed to recover from X2, so she sat out Viper. I love the inversions on Viper. The juxtaposition of the forceful vertical loops, floaty corkscrews, and awkward batwing is brilliant. I just wish the transitions between the inversions weren’t as choppy. 7 out of 10
Up next was a coaster Emily was looking forward to for sentimental reasons- New Revolution. Emily loves the original National Lampoon’s Vacation film, so she was excited to ride the coaster where Clark Griswold kidnapped the poor security guard.
Me- Poorly paced, but I like the setting and Schwarzkopf loops are always intense. 6 out of 10
Emily- “Why so many brakes?” Thumbs Sideways
Twisted Colossus was back up-and-running so I eagerly took a few laps on one of my favorite coasters in the world. They were only running two trains, but I consistently got one duel per ride.
Me- I know a lot of people hate the lift hill mid-ride, but I don’t mind it. Both halves of Twisted Colossus are awesome. It’s like having two top-10 steel coasters spliced together. And each half has oodles of airtime mixed with a pinch of hangtime. 10 out of 10
Emily- She liked Twisted Colossus, but it was a one-and-done for her. Emily has a love-hate relationship with the frenetic pacing of RMCs. Sometimes, she can ride Wicked Cyclone multiple times without issue. Other times, the maneuvers make her feel queasy. Thumbs Sideways
We then walked onto Justice League. These are always nice contrasts to the rest of the Six Flags lineup, but the version at Six Flags Magic Mountain is particularly strong.
Me- I love the mix of screens and physical sets. One of the best shooters out there. 9 out of 10
Emily- “Did Six Flags steal this from Disney? It’s too well themed.” Thumbs Up
Emily was still feeling the after effects of Twisted Colossus, so she sat out Riddler’s Revenge and Batman the Ride. Two super forceful, old-school B&M inverts probably wouldn’t have helped.
Riddler’s Revenge is without a doubt the best stand-up coaster. It’s tall. It’s fast. It’s smooth (if you know how to position the restraint). And it makes your legs feel like jelly from the forces. 8 out of 10
Batman the Ride continued the assault on my legs. The snappiness of the inversions combined with those leg-numbing helices results in one of the most intense and draining coasters out there. 8.5 out of 10
I wanted to finish the night with rerides on Twisted Colossus and X2. I had no issue walking onto Twisted Colossus for a few extra rides. And it got better and better each time.
Unfortunately, I was not able to get on X2 again. I was spited by the brutal California weather. Get ready for this. Even Carowinds would poke fun at this.
It was dry and 58 degrees with barely any wind.
For those local to the park, is X2 really that valley-prone?
So as a consolation prize, we took a final lap through the park to admire the lights. Outside of Discovery Kingdom, the chain as a whole does a fantastic job on their holiday lights.
Six Flags Magic Mountain is probably my favorite Six Flags park outside of Fiesta Texas. Emily says it’s the Six Flags park she hates least. I guess that’s sort of a compliment.