Hansa Park was one of my favorite parks on my recent Europe trip. I could gush all day about it. The landscaping is beautiful. The park had way more theming than expected. And the rides are great too.
Except there is one problem when it comes time to write a trip report. Their major coasters have spoilers. If you want to avoid having the surprised ruined, I recommend the following three things.
1) Do not go to RCDB.
2) Do not read the ride signs outside the attractions.
3) Avoid the spoiler section at the end of this report.
My train arrived an hour before Hansa Park even opened so I had to kill some time. Since the park is located atop a hill overlooking the Baltic Sea, I took a scenic walk down to the water. I also got excited when I found a Banana Museum, but it was closed.
Once inside the park, I anxiously waited to Karnan to open. Skipping all the spoilers inside the building, I'll just start with the first drop. It’s incredible and one of the best in the world. The fact that a 200+ foot drop is entirely enclosed is sweet in its own right, but the sustained ejector air and laterals are insane if you’re towards the back. This drop felt like Expedition GeForce’s first drop on steroids.
When you emerge, you’re blinded. It’s similar to an on-ride photo blinding you on a night ride. You then rocket into this funky sea serpent thing. If you’re towards the front, you get some amazing airtime and laterals on the first part and a smaller pop and lats on the second part. Reverse that if you’re in the back.
You then charge through an overbank that has laterals exceeding that of Skyrush’s Stengel dive. It’s downright wild. Karnan then hugs the ground and eventually whips around this ridiculously tight turn that will have your legs number than a Batman clone.
Karnan then returns to the airtime with this incredible camelback with some powerful and sustained ejector airtime. Karnan gives you a second to catch your breath as you return towards the brake run, but it does have one last bunny hill with some more sustained ejector.
I also want to take a moment to talk about Karnan’s smoothness. It definitely has a bit of a shimmy to it, but the lack of OSTRs leads to zero discomfort. It’s still smoother than most wood coasters.
I had very high expectations for Karnan. And you know what? The ride met them! The combination of an immersive story, incredible airtime, and strong laterals. And when you mix in the surprises detailed below, you truly have one of the best coasters in the world. 10 out of 10
One of the park’s funkiest rides is actually their frisbee ride as this is the park home to the one themed to a giant bell. I made sure to hit Glocke early since the capacity is putrid. I think it’s 6 riders per cycle.
And fortunately it rides as cool as it looks. This one spun surprisingly fast, even on max swings. These max swings had some nice floater air plus a cool visual of water geysers below your feet. 8 out of 10
Next door was Stortebekers Kaperfahrt, a spinning raft slide. Like most of these rides, this one spun better than a tea cup. And it’s a good thing too because the rest of the layout is pretty tame.
The slide itself is dry, but those who hate water are in for an unpleasant surprise. You know how most parks charge you 25 cents for water cannons? Hansa Park gives its guests free water guns. Don’t try to fight it; you’re getting very wet. 6 out of 10
I then made my way across the park to Fluch von Novgorod. This ended up being my longest wait of the day at 45 minutes. But the queue was very well themed so I didn’t mind too much.
I’m skipping some spoilers, but you eventually emerge from the castle (Hansa Park really has a thing for them) and fly over this amazing camelback. The sustained ejector air feels like something from a hyper coaster. There’s also this awesome barrel roll with a ton of hangtime.
Unfortunately, Fluch von Novgorod has OSTRs, so you need to ride defensively during this pretzel turnaround. Thankfully, that’s the only rough part of the ride.
As good as the outdoor section of Fluch von Novgorod is, it’s the indoor section that makes it standout. See the spoilers below if you want to know why. 8 out of 10
By this point I was dry, but it didn’t last long. The flume, Wildwasserfahrt, had this evil little drop at the start that sent a wall of water over the side of the boat. The big drop was just ok, but the ride did travel past some really nice landscaping and decent theming. 6 out of 10
Now you’d think a ride called Super Splash would get you soaked, but it was ironically the driest water ride in the park. The final splash was huge, but all the water was repelled away from the boat.
Before that splash is a sizable drop that could have been quite good. It was a funky double down with a tiny pop of air. However, it jackhammered worse than most wooden coasters. 4 out of 10
Continuing the loop around the park, I then hit Kleine Zar, the kiddie coaster. As far as kiddie coasters go, this one wasn’t bad. It was smooth and came *this* close to giving airtime on the final bunny hill. 3 out of 10
Space Scooter is one of the oddest bumper cars around. The ride would be notable alone for being indoors with music and lighting, but it also has a game.
Riders are tasked with driving around the arena and shooting each planet. To shoot a planet, you needed to t-bone the wall while pressing a second foot pedal. When I realized I wasn’t going to win, I started obliterating all the other drivers who weren’t paying attention to the other cars. 8 out of 10
The park’s newest ride was Highlander, a colossal drop tower. I figured the views would be spectacular. Doubly so since it was running in “Super Tilt” mode in the afternoon.
However, the ride never tilted. I kept expecting to tilt at the top, but it never happened and we just dropped. So I’m not sure if the tilt feature was broken, but it was a good drop too; my stomach most definitely dropped.
It’s also worth noting the park strictly forbids glasses on all thrill rides even if you have a strap. While the view was blurry, I could still appreciate the ridiculous height since we were on a hill and also towering over Karnan. 9 out of 10
I then rounded out the rest of the park’s coaster collection starting with Rasender Roland, a surprisingly good Vekoma junior coaster. This one winds its way through the park’s Schwarzkopf. And it even has some Gs on the first helix and lats on the second helix. 6 out of 10
Speaking of that Schwarzkopf, Nessie was pretty good. The helices did absolutely nothing for me, but the loop and drops delivered. The second drop in particular had some really strong ejector in the back. And there’s also an abrupt kink into the brakes that gives a pop of air as well. 7 out of 10
One of the park’s most unremarkable coasters was Crazy Mine, the wild mouse. This one had minimal braking on the top section, but it had a very hard brake before the second half. It was able to regain enough speed for a pop of air or two though. 5 out of 10
I also want to point out there’s this 50 foot tower adjacent to the exit that gives some amazing views of both Crazy Mine and Schwur des Karnan. Make sure not to miss that!
The last coaster was a surprisingly good junior coaster, Schlange von Midgard. This one has a little show scene during the lift and some decently strong laterals. Plus it’s located over the water.
Speaking of water, watch out in the queue line. There’s this innocent looking female animatronic. But she will literally spit on you. 5 out of 10
I also made sure to ride Holsteinturm, the observation tower. It was nice to admire the park and its gorgeous location with my glasses on for a change. My only gripe was the short cycle. I think we got one rotation at the top before we descended. 8 out of 10
Hansa Park was the complete package. It was beautiful and had a great mix of rides. And the highlight is without a doubt Schwur des Karnan, a roller coaster that is a complete WTF of awesomeness.SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERSSchwur des Karnan
Schwur des Karnan’s queue line would fit in at a Disney park. The queue tells the story how a king wants an impenetrable fortress. To achieve this, the king used a magic spell that cost him his soul, which is now locked inside the castle. Flash forward to the present day and tourists are now exploring the castle.
The theming inside this castle even exceeds the famous Neuschwanstein Castle (which isn’t hard considering that castle is unfished). The highlight is the throne room, which is complete with a Cobra’s Curse esque projection mapping effect.
For those unaware, Karnan has assigned seating unlike any other ride. You’re put in groups of four. When the floor under you illuminates, a door randomly opens and that’s your row. On one hand, it’s a cool way to assign seats. On the other hand, there’s a chance you never get to experience the front or back. I was stubborn and kept riding until I did.
It’s now time for the super spoiler. What happens in the castle? After you leave the station, you head down this abrupt little drop, rip around a hairpin turn, and then ascend the massive vertical lift. Then the king appears on the ceiling and starts yelling at us in German.
I have no clue what he said, but he’s clearly pissed. The train starts to shake and then you freaking plummet backwards down the vertical lift. The element was awesome! The abruptness yielded a brief stomach dropping sensation and it’s just so unique. It would have been even better had I not been spoiled.
The last spoiler occurs at the very end. After you hit the brakes, you think you’re about to return to the station. But when you re-enter the building, you slowly crawl through a barrel roll that feels similar to the jojo roll of Hydra or Copperhead. And it even includes a crazy handchopper with the floor.Fluch von Novgorod
The coaster actually begins with a dark ride segment. I had barely any clue what was going on, but there’s something about a curse. You then hear riders curse as you dip down this very sudden plunge in total darkness. It has that abrupt airtime of the Mystery Mine shaft drop.
If that drop wasn’t enough, it leads into a launch. And it’s a surprisingly powerful launch. I couldn’t believe it, but it technically has a higher rate of acceleration than Top Thrill Dragster! You then rocket around a banked turn (not unlike Maverick) into the outdoor segment.
When the outdoor segment (detailed above) ends, you re-enter the castle and climb a vertical lift that doubles as a brief show scene. You then plunge down an always awesome beyond vertical drop.
Now keep in mind you’re still indoors. You then whip through this large and extremely disorienting overbank. The castle basically follows the path of the track. You then wiggle around in complete darkness for a few moments before hitting the brakes.
This is where most rides end, but Fluch von Novgorod may have the world’s best exit path. You take this slide back down to ground level and then have to navigate a surprisingly long maze to exit. That’s not a euphemism for a gift shop. You seriously navigate a legit maze with dead ends and such.