Sexual Orientation

[alilstronger]

I don't think that sexual orientation is something that people need to make into a big deal.

 

as long as there are not equal rights?

 

yeah, it needs to be made into a big deal.

 

I realize you are young, but did you know that my partner and I, who have been together 9 years, and own a House together, cannot file our taxes together? nor can I leave him anything untaxed in my Will. Nor do I have any right to visit him, or make any medical decisions for him in terms of treatment/medical care (god forbid)if something were to happen that required hospitalization?

 

those are just a few rights -- of the top of my head -- that I don't have.

 

but if you were to go to Vegas, meet a girl, and marry her that night? You'd have all of those rights immediately.

 

so yeah. . until things change? Yep. .it's a big deal.

 

Visibility = acceptance

acceptance = rights.

 

I was talking about on a personal level rather that gay rights. I'm all for anyone of any sexuality having the same privleges and not being cast out because of one small part of what a person is. I was also refering to how in society a majority of people make being gay into some huge horrible thing. People need to just calm down and realize that sexual orientation isn't something that should be a huge political debate but that's what it has turned into. What I should've said was that I wish we weren't in a possition to where it needs to be made into a big deal and that nobody really cared about things like sexuality, skin color, ect. But alas we do not live ina world with full of rainbows and happiness for all and discrimination is still a major problem on both a governmental and social level.

 

 

I personally could not agree with you more. I HATE when I see even gay people saying things like that - about why are we making a big deal out of this. Well I tell them I want the same rights as a straight couple. The gay people who say this are usually the ones that do not care for getting married but there are many of us who want to get married. I for one would LOVE to get married AND have the same rights as everyone. I am glad that we as a public made gay marriage legal in MD this past election.

[GayCoasterGuy]

^But then we though in the issue of internalized homophobia (a REAL issue in our community) and things get more complicated.

 

I totally understand, alilstronger. I get annoyed by stuff in our community as well. Mine would probably be the gay men I know where *everything* they talk about MUST related to who and how HOT they think so and so is. Everything is a sexual innuendo... It's at an acting out level in some cases. Of course, I totally understand why people do it, but it's still very annoying. I surely can't go around controlling how people act and hating on them, so I tolerate. But I can tell people "look, I don't care who you think is HOT, and I don't need to hear about your sexcapades last week." I'm 39 years old, I can still be 100% *gay* (and say I'm gay) and not have to talk about sex or who I think is hot.

[John_RN]

Coming from a Texas gay man also, I feel pretty darn happy that my workplace organization recognizes same sex partnerships and I can have my partner of almost 10 years on my health insurance. And he is also my beneficiary on my life insurance. Although after we worked out the math, it would be more sensible for him to stay on his work's insurance plan and for me on mine since my insurance is basically free and adding him would take out $300 a month. Also, when he was in a local ICU for almost 4 days about 6 years ago, even before Obama, I was never not allowed to see him or stay the night in his ICU room. Maybe it is just because I live in Austin, not sure. They spoke to me like I was his "legal spouse".

 

I would be beautiful if we could file our taxes together and get the other legal rights that straight married couples do though. Maybe one day.....*sigh*

[Zem]

Maybe it is just because I live in Austin

 

I believe it is Texas law or just the hospital's policy. The Austin area seems like the one of most gay friendly cities in Texas and the majority of residents seem fairly open minded. This may be inaccurate since I don't live there but I do visit for extended periods of time each year. Here in Houston it seems not as much considering a large portion of the population hold more conservative views. One thing I want to bring up are two of my friends as well. One good friend of mine has told her parents, who didn't mind, as well as couple close friends, including me, while the other is afraid to tell her parents because they would practically disown her. Both are girls who have parents that are strict Catholics as well but I guess it varies on a case by case basis. Do you think parents have a lot to do with how some people despite being gay will hide it in fear of how their parents will react? Also, a girl who sits with me on the bus thinks she might be gay but isn't sure. Do you think although possibly being straight, some teenager go through a phase being unsure of their sexual orientation? I've never had any doubts myself but I find t'his a very interesting subject and would like the opinions of others.

[bert425]

^^ You're just not seeing the part of Houston where the majority of the "acceptance" (my word, not yours ) is.

 

ie: the Montrose.

 

I lived off of Montrose and Richmond for about 4 years a long, long time ago. . and yeah, it was like the gay ghetto, but I felt very accepted there.

 

of course, this was years before Paul Broussard

 

and for you younguns, here's the wiki entry on that:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Paul_Broussard

 

I had moved to Austin 4 years prior to this. . but it still shocked the hell out of me (the fact that I so easily recall his full name speaks to that )

[GayCoasterGuy]

Maybe it is just because I live in Austin, not sure. They spoke to me like I was his "legal spouse".

 

I would be beautiful if we could file our taxes together and get the other legal rights that straight married couples do though. Maybe one day.....*sigh*

 

It will happen, just a matter of time But how cool you have a seemingly stable partner. It's hard to find a good boyfriend/girlfriend, no matter our sexual orientation. (I guess I won't slip in the part that we have 1/10th or less the pool to pick from... oops messed up not mentioning it!) But in reality, it makes it all the better. Kinda like when we adopt kids, they were picked - they were chosen, so they are very special.

[alilstronger]

^But then we though in the issue of internalized homophobia (a REAL issue in our community) and things get more complicated.

 

I totally understand, alilstronger. I get annoyed by stuff in our community as well. Mine would probably be the gay men I know where *everything* they talk about MUST related to who and how HOT they think so and so is. Everything is a sexual innuendo... It's at an acting out level in some cases. Of course, I totally understand why people do it, but it's still very annoying. I surely can't go around controlling how people act and hating on them, so I tolerate. But I can tell people "look, I don't care who you think is HOT, and I don't need to hear about your sexcapades last week." I'm 39 years old, I can still be 100% *gay* (and say I'm gay) and not have to talk about sex or who I think is hot.

 

I could not agree with you more! So many gay guys base EVERYTHING on looks or what brand of clothes you wear, car you drive, where you went to school, or where you shop in general. I am no where near this and I pride myself in not being like this. There is A LOT of animosity within our community and I hate it. Some gay guys think they are so much better then others and it sucks! I was out dancing this past weekend actually and two guys pushed me out of their way on the dance floor because they simply did not want to walk around me or say excuse me.

[bert425]

So many gay guys base EVERYTHING on looks or what brand of clothes you wear

 

But you only have that one Hollister shirt!

 

(not that you don't look good in it. . but. . . . )

[GayCoasterGuy]

^Doh! Touche'! He got you there, alilstronger. It's ok, we love you anyway

 

I'll have to post a picture of the home made AnF shirt I made in the late 90s (does anyone even wear AnF anymore?) It was very popular in the gay/yuppie crowd back then. Seriously annoying and all about surface (since we're talking about that). I made it with a 50 cent shirt from a thrift store and a black sharpie. Funny thing is, the joke worked! People thought it was real.

[John_RN]

^Doh! Touche'! He got you there, alilstronger. It's ok, we love you anyway

 

I'll have to post a picture of the home made AnF shirt I made in the late 90s (does anyone even wear AnF anymore?) It was very popular in the gay/yuppie crowd back then. Seriously annoying and all about surface (since we're talking about that). I made it with a 50 cent shirt from a thrift store and a black sharpie. Funny thing is, the joke worked! People thought it was real.

 

LOL!!! Oh man I tried to be a part of that late 90's early 2000's A&F crowd. Awful!! Now that I've paid my way through nursing school and have established a career I look back at myself back then and just shake my head. The things that I used to think were so important are just so ridiculous now. I could not let a weekend go by without going to the gay glubs. Every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday you could find me at many bars in San Antonio. Now I hardly stay awake past 10pm! Went back to the same bars a year ago just for the hell of it.....wow. Seriously, same people, same old song and dance, different decade. No thanks! Fun yes, but only about once every few years maybe.

[GayCoasterGuy]

No thanks! Fun yes, but only about once every few years maybe.

 

Got that right! Thankfully, there is "more for us to do now" than bars. Progress is good!

[alilstronger]

So many gay guys base EVERYTHING on looks or what brand of clothes you wear

 

But you only have that one Hollister shirt!

 

(not that you don't look good in it. . but. . . . )

 

Thank you! Honestly, I do like name brand but for people that don't know me to judge by that name on my shirt (not saying you are - I mean in general)... I only paid $3.00 for that shirt at a Goodwill! I am a HUGE thrift store, Goodwill, second hand store shopper. Also I frequent Marshalls, TJ Maxx, and Ross A LOT. Why shop in a mall when you get all the same name brands else where A LOT cheaper. If I shop in a mall - its straight to the clearance racks for me. A lot of gay guys would not be caught dead in something from a thrift store. But when I question them by saying its no different then going to a store and buying something that someone else has tried on they quiet up.

[bert425]

^^ I was *totally* just teasing you, since every pic I've seen on TPR you seem to be wearing it

 

 

and hey, I did say you look good

 

 

 

I actually buy a lot of my clothes in Thrift Stores, or at Concerts (I'm very much a T-shirt & shorts person. . that's why I love the Tech Industry. . I get to wear those to work every day).

 

if I have to go "nice". .then we just shop at Kohl's.

 

honestly tho. . I have a lot of weird/fetish stuff that I only wear at conventions (like Dragon*con, or Las Vegas Fantasy Fetish ball). . so if you asked me, i'd absolutely say that I'm not a fashion snob and don't really own anything "name" other than a couple of Polo's I've had for many years.

[alilstronger]

^ I know! hehe

 

I appreciate your nice comments because anyone that knows me well knows I have the worst self esteem with my looks.

 

I will have to agree with being able to wear comfortable clothes to work! My office is very jeans and tshirt. That is one reason I want to stay with them.

[DCA_Chris]

Nice to see a thread for this here!

 

Gay myself. I've sort of noticed that the coaster community (and definitely the Disney community) seems to generally have a higher percentage of gay people in it compared to the "10%" seen elsewhere. It's cool to see a poll that actually confirms it!

[bert425]

Nice to see a thread for this here!

 

Gay myself. I've sort of noticed that the coaster community (and definitely the Disney community) seems to generally have a higher percentage of gay people in it compared to the "10%" seen elsewhere. It's cool to see a poll that actually confirms it!

 

Add comic book fans to that list too

 

(with a very much higher proportion of us being Wonder Woman fans)

 

 

[John_RN]

Wow, I love coasters, comic books, and Disney.....3 for 3. lol

[GayCoasterGuy]

I have the worst self esteem with my looks.

 

This comes with the territory. I know, shocking!

 

You are perfect just how you are. Like Ru Paul said once "we were born naked, everything else is drag." Your clothes do not matter. And your looks (which are above average) do not matter to the people who care about you and are actively in your life. Our culture/society puts too much emphasis on looks and what you have/accolades; sometimes gay folks (and other minority groups) put even MORE emphasis on it. Don't buy into it, it's b.s.. Being a nice person to others (and ourselves) is more important.

[alilstronger]

I have the worst self esteem with my looks.

 

This comes with the territory. I know, shocking!

 

You are perfect just how you are. Like Ru Paul said once "we were born naked, everything else is drag." Your clothes do not matter. And your looks (which are above average) do not matter to the people who care about you and are actively in your life. Our culture/society puts too much emphasis on looks and what you have/accolades; sometimes gay folks (and other minority groups) put even MORE emphasis on it. Don't buy into it, it's b.s.. Being a nice person to others (and ourselves) is more important.

 

Thank you so much! Once my ex left me with no explanation I felt very unattractive. I am slowly getting over it even though it is taking a long time. I do agree with you though. I accept everyone for who they are. Maybe one day I will find some nice guy who takes me more for then just my looks.

 

Also I need to start watching drag race. I have never seen it.

[bert425]

Also I need to start watching drag race. I have never seen it.

 

one of the best shows on TV.

 

absolutely hysterical, and some of the bawdyness Ru gets away with! OMG.

 

stuff that you have to scratch your head and wonder how the heck it gets past the censors!

 

the main thing Ru always says is that the fierce queens need to stand out by showing their

 

"Charisma

Uniqueness

Nerve &

Talent"

 

(yeah . that's the credo they get away with EVERY week!)

 

 

 

and I can't even post a clip to the over the top "lipsynch" mini contest from last week. . as this is an all ages site here, and the set up for the contest (kneeling behind a divider, with only their lips showing thru a "hole") was definitely not for "all ages". . . LOL. . we were absolutely shrieking with laughter!

 

 

so yeah. . Drag Race is one of the most fun shows on TV

 

 

(oh, and you are absolutely adorable. . . yet I mourn the loss of the Hollister avatar )

[Moose]

^Agreed with everything he said, except for the avatar comment. (I like the new one )

[alilstronger]

^ and ^^ Thank you guys! I will have to see if I even have the Logo channel.

[Stitch_101]

I guess I'm in the minority here... I could never really get into Drag Race. I've watched it on and off because my partner likes it... I guess I'm just more of a blood and guts guy LOL. I love me some Dexter and TWD

[DCA_Chris]

Never got into that show, myself. I live near SF, if I wanted to watch RuPaul's Drag Race I'd just go out to the city.

 

I guess you could chalk me up in the blood and guts category too. HUGE American Horror Story fan, which weirdly seems to also have a gigantic gay following. I guess having Zachary Quinto and Sarah Paulson in it doesn't hurt.

[bert425]

Never got into that show, myself. I live near SF, if I wanted to watch RuPaul's Drag Race I'd just go out to the city.

 

I guess you could chalk me up in the blood and guts category too. HUGE American Horror Story fan, which weirdly seems to also have a gigantic gay following. I guess having Zachary Quinto and Sarah Paulson in it doesn't hurt.

 

^^ having an openly gay creator also helps with the "sensibilities". . not that the show is overtly gay, but it has very gay undertones

 

and it doesn't have to be either/all. . heh. .we love RuPaul as well as Blood and Guts (LOVE Walking Dead, and AHS, and slasher films too!).