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The "Post Your Favorite Family Guy Quotes" Game!


robbalvey
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Went through all 42 pages to make sure this wasn't up here already:

 

"Well, I'm a pompous little anti-Christ who will probably forget about his plans for world domination when I fall in love with a rough trick named 'Jim'"

 

--Brian playing the part of Stewie when the family role plays for anger management class.

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(Brian and Stewie are on a German tour bus.)

German Tour Guide: You vill find more on Germany's contributions to ze arts in ze pamphlets ve have provided.

Brian : Yeah, about your pamphlet... uh, I'm not seeing anything about German history between 1939 and 1945. There's just a big gap.

Tour guide: Everyone vas on vacation. On your left is Munich's first city hall, erected in 15...

Brian : Wait, what are you talking about? Germany invaded Poland in 1939 and...

Tour Guide: We were invited. Punch vas served. Check vit Poland.

Brian : You can't just ignore those years. Thomas Mann fled to America because of Nazism's stranglehold on Germany.

Tour guide: Nope, nope. He left to manage a Dairy Queen.

Brian : A Dairy Queen? That's preposterous.

Tour guide: I vill hear no more insinuations about the German people. Nothing bad happened. Sie werden sich hinsetzen. Sie werden ruhig sein. Sie werden nicht beleidigen Deutschland. You will sit down. You will shut up. You will not insult Germany. (Throws his hand up in a Hitler salute.)

Brian : Uh, is that a beer hall?

Tour guide: (Snapping out of it) Oh yes, Munich is renowned for its historic beer halls.

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Peter: I call to the stand the ghost who never lies.

People: Ooooh

Peter: But only I can see or here him

People: Awww

Judge: I'll allow it but you better be going somewheer with this

Peter: Dont worry Judge I will. Ghost who never lies will you point out the culprits or culprit if he or she is in this room. Hey why are you pointing at me

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Old Lois-"So Quagmire, hows your arthritis?"

 

Old Quagmire-"Well fine, ever since you walked in the door I have been felling stiff. Giggity Giggity OH! Oops just pooped a little."

 

_______________

While Tom Brady is taking a shower, Stewie looks at him through a peep hole-"BING BONG HELLO!!!"

 

_______________

Chris-"Why is that scary clown looking at me at the end of my bed?"

 

Shows Ronald McDonald.

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