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PRINCE DESMOND'S BIG DIPPER COASTERS


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My Big Dipper Coaster seeds came in today! I was very excited to get started, but I had no clue what to do to grow my own Big Dipper, as Prince Desmond did not include any instructions. For your instant-pleasure, I have included a picture tutorial on how to grow your very own Big Dipper Coaster in 4 simple steps!

 

WARNING: Keep coaster heavily guarded from buttered-popcorn yielding women from Ohio.

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I received two packages in the mail today. It was very hard deciding which one to open first =)

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But it turns out that my Big Dipper seeds had arrived from Prince Desmond straight from Nigeria!

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Step 1: Dig a hole large enough to place teh Big Dipper seed into.

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Step 2: Place your seed in the hole. [stop giggling.]

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Step 3: You are going to need to water your newly planted seed. Water from Ohio works best, but anything will do.

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Step 4: Water your Big Dipper seed. Now you must wait 45 seconds for your brand-new [old] Big Dipper coaster to fully bloom!

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And voila! You can now start riding your old and decrepit Big Dipper coaster!

Edited by Mr. Starr
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Here's my Big Dipper coaster trip report.

 

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I received a package from Scamjoubi, Nigeria, yesterday. I'm not sure why he used U.S. postage. Let's hear it for the USPS for getting these to me.

 

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I'm just following instructions.

 

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I opened it up and found these.

 

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There are six of them! That means I helped save teh Big Dipper coaster six times more than those of you who didn't buy any.

 

I don't think I'll be planting these. I'm going to save them for after the the predicted apocalypses. Harold Camping's predicted day is coming up on May 21, 2011, and of course who can forget December 21, 2012.

 

Besides, with my luck, they'd either grow into Prowler, or, worse, Mean Streak.

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A magikal parcel has arrived...

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What's this I see amongst the usual junk mail... could it be a parcel from the great Prince Desmond Himself?

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Hmm... best do what it says; I don't want to anger the spirit of Mujabubukins!

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It's such a shame, I was engulfed in a cloud of nigerian majik as I opened the envelope but it didn't come out on film!

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Thank you Prince Desmond and your servant Rubb Ulvey for this kind gift, my table has been blessed by the light of 34,780 Suns and my life feels more fulfilled!

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The Big Dipper Coasters have arrived in Williamsburg! Angus McNasty's heart is filled with joy!dipper_2_0.jpg

 

If the Co stars make Angus' heart filled with anything but anger and spite, I suspect they will do wonders for my warring kitties. I have ordered a foursome to bring peace to my household.

Edited by Moose
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So I recieved this really strange letter in the mail today... I'm not yet sure what it means.

 

 

 

U.S.A. Internal Revenue Service Department.

Bureau of Consular Affairs

Washington , DC 20520

Greeting from USA I.R.S,

 

Attention Please Cristean Konnolly,

 

We write to inform you that your package with reference number 2661428 has been in Customs facility custody waiting for resolutions of the clearance to further the delivery to your delivery address by the delivery Agent who came all the way from Africa. We have been waiting for you to contact us regarding your consignment box which the agent suppose to deliver to you which was on hold by USA Customs Department and they are requesting for clearance certificate which will be obtain from the origination of the consignment box before it will be released from the Customs to the delivery agent to complete the delivery.

 

After the phone call we made on your behalf to the USA Customs Authority and the Government of Republic of Nigeria, it was resolved that the delivery of your consignment to your address must be complete within two (2) working days upon your compliance to our directives; You should send the sum of $350, 00 usd to obtain the needed Ownership-clearance certificate from Republic of Nigeria,

 

The clearance charges which was initially on the high price has been cut down by the US Embassy in Republic of Nigeria, considering the poor economic situations that make it difficult for the middle class citizens to meet up with the clearance of their entitlement.

 

We will upon the confirmation of your clearing charge assign our Diplomat Agent (Mr.James Desmond) to travel to USA and collect your package and proceed with the delivery. Meanwhile you are advice to reconfirm the below information upon contacting us to avoid delivery to wrong person after obtaining the needed Ownership-clearance certificate from Republic Of Nigeria because that is what the Customs here are waiting for .

 

1- Your Full Name

2- Your Delivery Address

3- Your Contact Telephone Number

4- Your Occupation

5- Your Identification (Passport number or ID Card number)

 

Once you notify us with the above information and the needed Ownership-clearance certificate from Republic of Benin, the USA Customs will release your consignment to you and it will be delivered to you by the agent,

 

Note that you are expected to pay only $350, 00 usd for Ownership-clearance certificate and you are to pay it to Republic of Nigeria as the origination of the package in favour of Prince Desmond as our esteemed ruer in Republic of Nigeria Send the $350, 00 usd through western union or Money Gram once you receive this mail with the information below for immediate release of your package,

 

Receivers Name:==== Prince Desmond

Country/City:=======Republic of Nigeria

Test Question:=======Majububkins

Text Answer========Diper

Amount:===========$350, 00 usd

 

Once you send the money to Republic of Nigeria to this name , please try to notify us with the MTCN so that we can contact Prince Desmond for easy pick up and for immediate action on the release of your Ownership-clearance certificate.

 

So you are urgently advised to comply with our directives so that the Customs will release your consignment.

 

Yours Sincerely

 

Mr. Rub Elvey Commissioner of Internal Revenue Service.

 

U.S.A. Internal Revenue Service

Department Washington,

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After sending $350, 00 US Dollars to the above parties, my dreams have come true. My $4 Million in Nigerian Millenium Duckets came in the mail today.

 

I'm looking forward to finding out where I can spend my new found riches tomorrow. Check back!

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Feel free to send all your hate mail and or anthrax to the above address.

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It's all about Desmonds Baby.

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