dr.gumbo Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 ^ That one was a bit uncalled for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supertrooper Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 ^ That one was a bit uncalled for. I'm gay, and I don't rollerskate, but I thought the joke was funny. Lighten up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ash.1111 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 I'm gay and haven't rollerskated either. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DBru Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 What's the hardest part about roller skating? Telling your parents you're gay LOL I don't get it... Are you implying that you are homosexual if you roller skate? Not trying to be mean or anything, just wondering... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ash.1111 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Yeah, it did. Not alot of people do get it, but it's damn funny if you do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astroworldfan1 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 So if I Ice-Skate, does that mean I am Gay? I had to think about the "joke" a couple times. -Tatum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ash.1111 Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 I have no idea? Are you? Seriously, who cares. It's a joke. If someone calls me straight I wouldn't mind if it's in a joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcjaco Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Disclaimer! You need a sense of humor to view our site, if you don't have a sense of humor, or are easily offended, please turn back now! That is all. Even if it is a dumb joke. Let's move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
astroworldfan1 Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Yo' mamma is so fat, when she goes to a buffet, she gets the group discount! Yo' mamma is so ugly, the whole neighborhood pitched in for curtains. What's dumb? Directions of Toliet Paper What's dumber? Reading the Directions on the Toliet Paper What is the dumbes of them all? Reading the Directions and finding out you've been doing it wrong until you've the directions on the Toliet Paper. -Tatum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheStig Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 What is the dumbest of them all? This whole part of your post! What is the dumbes of them all? Reading the Directions and finding out you've been doing it wrong until you've the directions on the Toliet Paper. LOL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DBru Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 ^^I think you should have stuck with the "Your Mom" jokes, Tatum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scaparri Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Did you guys hear about the bombing in Kentucky? Yeah, somebody bombed a library. All four books were destroyed. The sad part is, only two of them were colored in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pkd freak Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes. The first man said, "My Benny loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky." The second man said, "My Carl was a good fisherman, so I'm going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake." The third man said, "My Jim was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Sock Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 While I was driving down the M1 the other day, (going a little faster than I should have been) I passed under a bridge, only to see a policeman on the other side with a radar gun, laying in wait. The policeman pulled me over, walked up to the car and with that classic, patronising smirk, asked: "Runway too short"? To which I replied. "I'm late for work" To which he asked, "What do you do?" "I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded. The policeman was surprised and confused. "A what" "A rectum stretcher" "and just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well," I said "I start by inserting one finger then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four then with my whole hand in, work side to side until I can stretch and stretch and then I slowly but surely stretch the hole until it's about 6 feet" Then the policeman asked questioningly and cautiously. "And just what do you do with a six-foot arsehole?" To which I politely replied, "You give it a radar gun and park it behind a bridge..." Speeding ticket: £105, Court Costs: £45, Look on copper's face: Priceless.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ash.1111 Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 Your mum's so fat that when she put on a yellow raincoat and walked down the street, someone yelled out TAXI. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ttd rox Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 I have the most corney ones ever! One jock in the locker room says I have a 6 pack! The other jock laughs and says, "Well I have an eight pack!" A nerd walks by and says "Well I have a 2 liter!" Which book of the Bible makes the best coffee? Hebrews I know they're stupid but that's all I can think of at the moment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Team Thriller Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 This is acually a honest-to-god story I read about: Defendant: Your honor, what would happen if I called you a son of a bitch? Judge : Your sentence would be longer and would include a plenty cost. Defendant: What if I think you are a son of a bitch? Judge : Nothing. There is no law against thinking something about another. Defendant: Okay, in that case, I think you are a son of a bitch. ========================================== There are three people stuck on an Island. A brown haired, a black haired, and a blood. The closes land is 10 miles away. The brown swims 3 miles and drowns. The black haired swims 8 miles a drowns. The blood swims 5 miles, got tired, so swam back. --James "Thats all folks" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phazan Posted May 30, 2008 Share Posted May 30, 2008 What's the worst part about joining the Coast Guard? Telling your mom your GAY!! HAHA (I'm actually not against the Coast Guard...don't take me seriously..) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rolercstrluvr Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 womens rights Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cycamps Posted May 31, 2008 Share Posted May 31, 2008 ^Ha! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King of Ka Posted June 1, 2008 Share Posted June 1, 2008 A horse walks into a bar, and the barman asks him, "Why the long face?" Two jumper cables walk into a bar, and the bartender says to them, "You can come in here, but don't try to start something." A priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?" Two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've seen it coming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bgeguy Posted June 1, 2008 Share Posted June 1, 2008 A rather bad man dies and meets Satan in a room with three doors. Satan explains, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that you have to spend eternity behind one of these doors. But, the good news is that you can take a peek behind each and take your choice." So, the man opened the first door and saw a room full of people, standing on their heads on a concrete floor. Not very nice, he thought. Opening the second door, he saw a room full of people standing on their heads on a wooden floor. Better, he thought, but best to check the last door. Upon opening the last door, he saw a room full of people, standing waist-deep in shit and sipping coffee. "Of the three, this one looks best," he said and waded in to get something to drink while Satan closed the door. A few minutes later the door opened, Satan stuck his head in and said, "Ok, coffee break's over, back on your heads!" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There were three men who were lost in the forest. They were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass the trial. The first step of the trial was to go into the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits. The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples." The king then explains the trial to him - you have to shove the fruits up your ass without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten. The first apple went in...but on the second one he winced in pain, so he was killed and went to heaven. The second guy arrives with ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him, he thought to himself that this should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...but on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter, therefore also was killed. The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it. I saw the third guy coming with pineapples." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PoisonedPirate Posted June 5, 2008 Share Posted June 5, 2008 A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. 'Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday.' Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral. The frog says, 'Sure. I have this,' and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, 'There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral.' She holds up the tiny pink elephant. 'I mean, what in the world is this?' The bank manager looks back at her and says... 'It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan, His old man's a Rolling Stone.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalepi_Konei Posted June 7, 2008 Share Posted June 7, 2008 Ok a man in Germany goes into a bar and orders 3 pints of beer, he does this because it reminds him of the times he and his 2 brothers used to drink together but now they are apart. So he drinks all 3 beers and orders another 3 the bartender walks up and says "When I serve them they go flat I think you should just drink one at a time" The man explains the perdicament and the bartender understands. Well after a while the man became a regular at the bar and then one day he walks in orders 2 pints of beer, the bartender realizing this walks up to him and says "Im sorry for your loss" The man thinking about this eventually gets it and goes "Oh no one died, I just quit drinking!" That one cracks me up like you crack an egg in an all you can eat egg breakfast. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ash.1111 Posted September 25, 2008 Share Posted September 25, 2008 A police officer told me this one today during work experience at the station: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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