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Erik & Misty's Smoky Mountain Adventures


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When were you guys at Sir Goony's? You were right in my back yard!

 

Two days ago. But it was the one in Knoxville, not Chattanooga. (And this one was even funkier!) Photos when I get around to it.

 

I was about to say. If you were going to the one here, you would have been underwater. Stupid floods.

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Okay, I admit I'm not sure. I thought it was freezing, but I could easily be wrong. It could also be that they have different temps for different coasters. I'll try to find out the official answer and report back.

 

But, for now, we have two remembrances of 40, so let's go with that.

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Parrot Mountain is one of those attractions I've always wanted to check out, but hadn't gotten around to because I was concerned that it would suck. But, that's the beauty of this thread: It gives me an excuse to go to those kinds of places anyway--secure in the knowledge that, at the very least, I'll be able to post pictures about how bad it was.

 

However, suction turned out not to be the case here. All I knew about Parrot Mountain, going in, was that there were lots of birds, it was religious, and that it was so high up a scary mountain road that we'd have to do it when we had a car.

 

I think it's safe to say that we were pleasantly surprised.

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And that's Parrot Mountain. It's actually pretty darned nice. And right next door to Dollywood.

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If you haven't figured it out yet, I'm not religious. Still, I do appreciate nice sculpture and pretty fountains. And no one tried to convert me. So I'm not complaining.

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"My child." - "Yes, God?" - "You must collect birds!"

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It also houses a snack bar.

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The cheaper gift shop.

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The basketball hoop is really not helping dispel the illusion that these restrooms and gift shop are in somebody's house.

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Photos are not allowed inside, but this is where they keep the baby birds. It also doubles as the world's most expensive gift shop, as you can buy them.

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This is a toucan. There is absolutely no evidence that his name is Sam. Or that he is even a "he" for that matter. Or that he or she enjoys milk.

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These guys hate their own sign. "Stop telling people about us!"

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Let's not take grandma here.

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'Ello!

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Kookaburra. They make that "Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh" noise you here in movies when people suddenly realize they're in a scary jungle.

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"How about some more caged birds, then?"

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Oh yeah, she hates me.

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Misty recovering from her ordeal.

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"Who's a pretty birdie?"

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"I WILL KILL YOU!!! YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!!!"

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"I really don't see what the big deal is...."

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"AHHH! They're injuring me! HELP!"

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"What? They seem friendly enough."

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"Oh crap, get 'em off me!"

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And now, the highlight of our visit: We get to feed the lories some juice!

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It is rather pretty.

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S'okay, I found him.

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Jesus's tomb, I presume. But where's Jesus??

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Though there are lot of statues and such throughout, this area is the most religiously-concentrated.

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"Let us out of here!"

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"This bird prefers open grasslands, so we've stuck him in a metal cage with a concrete floor. We're sure he'll like that."

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Moving right along....

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"I'm a stupid bird."

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"Oh, come on! We won't bite you that hard!"

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Misty sticks to the small birds.

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Wait, almost every pole has the warning sign on it. :p

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Smisty decides to give it a shot.

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I like rule #7. It sort of makes it like a video game: Come feed the birds, but watch out--some of them bite!

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Not very many birds in this one, oddly enough.

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Oh, it's an aviary! (Or, as my old co-workers back at Discovery Cove used to call them--much to my annoyance--"a bird aviary.")

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Well, it's not gonna stay a secret for long with that sign out there.

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Hello.

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It's also a "gardens," which makes anything better, in my book.

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Some birds are in cages, some aren't.

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This is actually the exit gift shop. Nice, eh?

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The entrance is very photogenic.

 

Admission is normally $15.00 for adults, but Misty got us in free through her employer.

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The parking lot at the top is not entirely straight.

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It's about a mile or so from here to the top, all of it steep and winding. Interestingly, bus parking is down here. So good luck to those folks.

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The parking lot in the foreground is actually Dollywood's.

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I hope you don't plan on a trip to the "As Seen on TV" store, before I post my Photo TR later this week.

 

Nope. It's all yours, bro. But I do expect great things from it.

 

/Which "As Seen On TV" store?

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Okay, I confirmed it with Dollywood: It must be at least 40 degrees for any and all of the coasters to operate. Sorry to Rastuso (and everyone else) for the misinformation earlier.

 

Even Blazing Fury? Several years ago, I was there in December on a very cold day and, if I remember correctly, it was open but the other coasters were closed. The water level appeared to have been lowered so that riders didn't get soaked just lightly sprinkled.

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In addition to Hauntings (covered earlier), there are two walk-through haunted houses in Gatlinburg: Ripley's Haunted Adventure (still to come) and Mysterious Mansion.

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All in all, a very nice walk-through haunted house.

 

The staff was great, and seemed to actually be monitoring our progress, which was a nice (creepy) touch. At one point, a ghostly voice even gave us hints when we were stuck.

 

Highly recommended.

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How do we get out of here?

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Hmmm, that seems bad.

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It's very effectively laid out, crossing over and around itself multiple times.

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It's $8.97 for adults and $6.95 for children. I think we got the children's price as locals.

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It is good. In fact, it reminded me quite a bit of Dr. Frankenstein's Castle at Indiana Beach.

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Photography within the experience itself is frowned upon, so this is me in the lobby.

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Sign me up for fun filled apprehension, please.

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The fact that these are real bumper stickers is what's funny about it, to me.

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The Mansion is accessed by going around a hearse parked on a bridge over the river.

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It's $8.97 for adults and $6.95 for children. I think we got the children's price as locals.

 

I believe you are incorrect, Sir--since I paid. The total was only $9.99 for both of us.

 

I would rank the above mentioned attractions in this order:

 

1. Mysterious Mansion

2. Dr Frankenstein's Castle

3. Ripley's Haunted Adventure

4. Hauntings

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So, it sounds like they didn't have any live actors when you went through? My brother and I went through close to Halloween and they actually had three live actors. (I have been several times in the past and seen one at the most and usually none)

 

One of them was literally jumping from balcony to balcony like a monkey. As a result, he would pop out on us several times through the walkthrough. Still trying to figure out what was wrong with the clown that followed us through half the house without trying to scare us. Seemed like he wanted to take us on the tour.

 

Anyways, great TR. Love me some Mysterious Mansion!

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So, it sounds like they didn't have any live actors when you went through?

 

No, there were at least two, sort of following us around. They were quite good. Even made Misty jump a couple of times (and she's a rock).

 

Best bit: One of the actors running a grinder (or something) across a metal grate, shooting sparks at you.

 

/Nothing beats Hauntings, though.

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I had been to the Sir Goony's in Chattanooga, but wasn't even aware that there was one in Knoxville until just a few days ago. Amazingly, this one is even more funky and awesome than the original.

 

Sir Goony's

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Okay, I'm going to say it: Sir Goony's, in Knoxville, is the epitome of old-school miniature golf funktasticness. You owe it to yourself, and to the brave men and women who gave their lives to construct it, to go there as soon as possible.

 

Thank you.

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"Don't mind me. You're doing great!"

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Smisty rockin' her Deep South/Texas shirt.

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"And I've got a hole in my tentacle! That makes me evil!"

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"I've got a fang."

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Does this look really kinky, or is it just me?

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Care to sit down for a moment?

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Not much better.

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Those are some effed-up looking ghosts.

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Pretty good likeness.

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The score card doubles as a coloring page.

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There are two courses: Championship and Goony.

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"I'm a crazy rock monster! Gimme your balls!"

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The spray bottle is in case you don't like cats. No, seriously.

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Note the penalty cup on the left.

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Don't get too confident. Kitty lies in wait.

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The haunted house was pretty cool.

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Mmmm, the open sea...the smell of fresh pond scum....

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"Is there a problem, officer?"

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"Hey, where'd my ball go?"

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This allowed me to get a zero on this hole. (While Misty fell into the cat trap.)

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Several holes have "bonus" and/or "penalty cups."

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Often, the key to mini golf victory is humping each hole into submission. (Wait, did that sound dirty? Oh...I guess it was supposed to.)

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Hmmm...water doesn't look too good.

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"Let me show you hole #1."

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"Hello. I'm October, and I will be your designated kitty escort at Sir Goony's today."

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This is where you go to buy tickets and be assigned a cat.

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Yes, there are go carts--and paintball, too--but neither were operating when we visited.

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This does look a bit kinky, but what's up with the dude in the truck dragging the trees down the road? Haha...

 

 

I've been so busy with work and school that I haven't been able to keep up with everything on TPR. I finally had some time to go back through all your reports. They are awesome as usual! I would love to live somewhere like that, where you always have different things to see and do.

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In past years, Dollywood has had a BBQ & Bluegrass festival around September. They didn't do it this year, though. I'm not quite sure why. Maybe they just felt the park stood up well enough on its own in the summer.

 

I certainly do.

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God shines his heavenly light down upon you. And also lens flare.

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The Emporium. Because every park must have an Emporium or Trading Company.

 

In fact, just to make sure I'm covered, when I get my own my park, the main gift shop will be called "The Emporium Trading Company."

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The Friendship Garden, heading back towards the main entrance and exit.

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SATANIC DECEPTION!!!

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Heh heh, "tit." (Well, "TTiT" really, but still.)

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I really like this photo, but I have no caption for it. Somebody help me out here.

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Cozy, eh?

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Dolly's (recreated) childhood home.

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Smisty enjoying a chili dog at Red's. (Or at least she was enjoying it until I took this photo.)

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Actually, just go ahead and make that "best car ride ever."

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Best car ride station ever.

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Rockin' Roadway and Red's Diner.

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Action shot!

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The lift is right at the beginning.

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Misty's artsy photo of Smoky Mountain Rampage's station.

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A new haystack dryer has been installed by the rapids ride. Here, we see Misty indicating the cost of using said dryer.

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The view from the Ferris Wheel has its points, but it really should be turned the other way, so that you can look at the other rides in the Country Fair area.

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The most terrifying ride in the park.

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Veggie Tales kiddie coaster and the Sky Flyer.

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The Dizzy Disk Disk'O.

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Circling around the Country Fair on the way back to the station.

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The train's butt. (Because everyone takes photos of the engine.)

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Let's read it together: "Please touch with your eyes only."

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"Hey buddy, wanna buy a geode?"

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Craftsman's Valley overview.

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Inside the General Store.

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The lye soap stand, after having been moved from Craftsman's Valley to the (then) empty path between Tennessee Tornado and River Battle, and then booted out of that spot for SkyZip, now resides here. In case you were keeping track.

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Taken approximately half a second before I leapt down the stairs.

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At what other park do you get a view like this?

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I finally got a good shot of this saw, after trying for about 3 years. (Yes, my life is very sad. I know.)

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"Well, we're movin' on up...."

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So let's go for a ride!

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This is probably my most ridden, most photographed ride in the park.

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Inside the blacksmith shop.

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Misty made me try one of these. It was less good than my attempt at the hi-striker.

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One of the SkyZip guides getting fresh.

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"God, how come school isn't still so primitive?" - "I'm not allowed in schools."

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Appalachian wisdom.

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"Go over there, dosey-doe, something something, fire in the hole!"

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Always looking for a new photo, especially of Blazing Fury.

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Tennessee Tornado exits into an arcade. (But at least it's themed.)

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The Tennessee Tornado cul-de-sac.

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There's a hi-striker near Tennessee Tornado now. You are witnessing the first time I have ever played one. I did not do well.

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2009's delayed-to-2010 project finally under construction.

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Pretty much what it feels like to be on the ride: Water everywhere and hard to figure out what's going on.

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On-ride water-cannon POV!

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River Battle. I'm not quite sure how, but somehow I managed to talk Misty into riding this with me again. (Note SkyZip in the background.)

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The best part of the ride.

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I love the distressed theming.

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Mystery Mine's first drop, right out of the station.

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Smisty, a really big tree, Lumberjack Lifts, and Mystery Mine.

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Timber Tower remains awesome to watch, and fairly uninteresting to ride.

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Yes, I did take a photo of the on-ride photo screen. But it's not really cheating, because we also bought the photo.

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This is a photo of the Lucky Sluices, so quit looking at Thunderhead! (Hello, my troughs are down here.)

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Thunderhead. Or as Dollywood calls it, "The Thunderhead."

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Let's see if anything's different since TPR came through.... Elissa! Shame on you!

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Heading left. If I ran things at Dollywood, I would look to put at least some kind of flat ride somewhere on this long path.

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Turnstiles. I know they're no toll booths, but still....

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Oooh, toll booths!

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This year, Dollywood added more than just SkyZip. They also got a spiffy new parking entrance.

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