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Aliens are Coming to Alabama on October 14!


Brandy524

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I ran a search and didn't see where anyone had posted this. I was listening to Rick and Bubba on the radio this morning and they were talking about this. Apparently this kook says that aliens have given her a message that they are coming on October 14, 2008, specifically to Alabama. I wonder if they ride rollercoasters.

 

http://blossomgoodchild.blogspot.com/2008/08/message-from-federation-of-light.html

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The Federation of Light... Maybe they'll crash into the Large Hadron Collider upon entry, thus allowing one of those man made black hole to escape, which in 4 years (2012) will become big enough to destroy the Earth... Yes things are coming together nicely.

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Things to do before ET gets here...

 

1. Put out the "No Xenomorph" signs and load the flame units

2. Mix the Kool-Aid

3. Pack a suitcase

4. Wash my blue jumpsuit

5. Get those bothersome nads removed

6. Stock up on pudding

7. Shed the container...

8. Paint "Adios" on my pulse rifle

9. Fire up the Power Loader

10. Toss the "artificial person" out the airlock before he goes haywire at dinner or gets ripped in half for some odd reason

11. Hook up the old record player to the PA system and play head exploding old music

12. Bait the airlock trap with Reeses Pieces

13. Fix a blob-shaped Jello mold in the aliens' honor

14. Get on top of tall city building with a sign to properly welcome them

15. Inform President Christopher Walken

16. Make sure the Marines like the cornbread

17. Put the little blond haired girl with the doll's head in charge

18. Pray it's NOT Apoophus

19. Check if my symbiote is gone

20. Quickie with Starbuck

21. Scratch head over Zena being a toaster

22. Call Zed

23. Check with the old guys if the World's Fair sculptures still work

24. Help deliver a squid on the roadside

25. Go back in time and tell some other poor lady she just birthed a lizard

26. Get a blessing from Jeff Goldbloom's dad, then give the aliens a cold

27. Light a cigar when the fat lady sings, or the virus loads, one

28. Keep an eye out for Brain Slugs down there on the cold floor

29. Tell Elzar to pick out a good Spice Weasel

30. Seale all entrances and exits

31. Close all shops in the mall

32. Cancel the three-ring circus

33. Secure all animals in the zoo

34. Plan my marriage

35. Plot my wife's murder

36. Frame Guilder for it

37. Feel swamped.

38. Demand warp speed from Scotty while offering him Scotch

39. Note that Bones is a Doctor not whatever it is he's griping about this week

40. Say "Fascinating" while looking at a rotating cube on the front viewer

41. Scream "KHAAAAAAANNNNN!!!!" really loud (shirt ripping optional)

42. Ask around San Francisco for humpback whales and nuclear wessels

43. Dig the worm out of Checkov's ear

44. Help some random old lady regrow a kidney while rescueing Checkov

45. Practice my Vulcan Neck Pinch

46. Submit my application to Star Fleet

47. Date a girl with bobbed hair who's really a giant octopus

48. Stay away from the un-named crewmen

49. Order Number 1 to take a number 2

50. Skip the Romulan Ale at future social functions

51. Get back to the Nexus

52. Call Alex Rogan and ask how that Death Blossom works again

53. Hide the gravity boots and phasers used to kill the Klingon Ambassador

54. Go back in time to save Zephrum Cochran, the father of Warp Drive

55. Remember that not all aliens keep their genitals in the same place.

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This is funny, but sad in equal measure.

 

Its clearly rubbish though. There are several things in writing such as urban ledgends or messages from space which are inconsistant or give the wrong amount of detail in the wrong place. Its pretty easy to spot once you learn what to look for.

 

For instance, shes been trying to sound like an alien. So she has been trying to decide what things an alien would and wouldnt know about us, but has been inconsistant with it. For instance, how come the alien knows what a day, year and month are in the first paragraph, but in the second, they suddenly dont know and call it "your 24 hour periods", despite that being technically a day.

 

Or, she could just be genuinely deluded, like those folks that are convinced we can live on just air, or that David Ike guy who turned up on the Wogan show claiming to be the Son of God.

 

I wonder if after the date passes with no ship appearing, it will be explained away as only those who beleive could see it. Which of course is different from what this message says.

 

And another thing, why would someone telepathic be able to translate another language? German people think in German, english people think in english, and aliens with think in alien (whatever language that particular species use).

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And another thing, why would someone telepathic be able to translate another language? German people think in German, english people think in english, and aliens with think in alien (whatever language that particular species use).

 

It's telepathetic it has a whole different meaning completely. You can think translate and understand everything you read in someone (or things) mind no matter what language (or tongue) they speak in.

 

Kalepi "DUH! Don't you read!" Konei

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