"Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Wait... what?!
Users viewing this topic: No registered users and 1 guest
Games, links, news, movies, WHATEVER!!! As long as it's not TOO dirty!
New to the TPR Forums? Come say hello and introduce yourself HERE!
Why do I still have a donkey title???
User avatar
 
Posts: 8954
Joined: 27 Jul 2013
Location: At KD
Gender: Male
Age: 31

"Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby DoinItForTheFame » Thu May 11, 2017 6:45 pm

I came across this ridiculous story, and thought it was worth sharing with you all!

Just when I thought I had heard it all... I swear, if he wins the $10 million I will officially give up on society.

Man Claims The New Unicorn Frappuccinio at Starbucks Made Him Gay

Queens, New York-

Charles Woodson, age 43, is claiming that a beverage he ordered at Starbucks has turned him into a homosexual. Woodson claims that he was dared to try the new Unicorn Frappuccinio from fellow co-workers and now believes that he is in fact gay.

“I don’t know what to do, I’ve got a wife and three kids but thats all out the door thanks to Starbucks.” said Woodson

“My construction buddies dared me to try it and I did, it looks like it’s a drink for daisies and believe me it is. As soon as I drank it I felt a difference in my body, I saw an attractive gentleman in the store and thought, wow I’d love to get up in that!” said Woodson

Woodson is preparing to sue the Starbucks company for this whole ordeal and is looking for a settlement in the range of $10 million dollars.

“It’s not fair yah know, tough guys can’t enjoy a beverage like that without being called gay and then something like this happens.” said Woodson


Source.

When life gets you down just remember: you could be the guy who is dumb enough to believe a Starbucks drink turned him gay. :lol:
Bigger is not always better. (And anyone who has ridden Wonder Woman knows this is true!)

BAYSIDE STATION!!!
User avatar
 
Posts: 23125
Joined: 17 Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver, Canada
Gender: Male
Age: 65

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby Nrthwnd » Thu May 11, 2017 7:02 pm

Really? I mean REALLY?

Well, we'll take them, any way we can get them, you know. ;)
Talk is Cheap :idea: Action is Pricele$$

Image

Star Wars is gay.
User avatar
 
Posts: 2620
Joined: 24 Oct 2009
Location: Colorado
Gender: Male
Age: 25

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby MayTheGForceBeWithYou » Fri May 12, 2017 3:25 am

Disclaimer

SADFLAG.com is a satire and parody site. Names are fictionalized unless we are parodying something or someone real.

Satire sites are still always a fun read regardless. Onion's still the king of that genre, but some of their other stories were still pretty funny.
人生は素晴らしき冒険旅行

Why do I still have a donkey title???
User avatar
 
Posts: 8954
Joined: 27 Jul 2013
Location: At KD
Gender: Male
Age: 31

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby DoinItForTheFame » Fri May 12, 2017 5:12 am

^ Well damn!!

However, even though it may fictionalized, I feel like there is still someone out there dumb enough to actually attempt a lawsuit like this! :lol:
Bigger is not always better. (And anyone who has ridden Wonder Woman knows this is true!)

Founder of the Cult of Skank Mountain
User avatar
 
Posts: 6784
Joined: 10 Feb 2014
Location: Philthadelphia
Gender: None specified

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby boldikus » Fri May 12, 2017 7:48 am

You really thought this was real with a line like:

“My construction buddies dared me to try it and I did, it looks like it’s a drink for daisies and believe me it is. As soon as I drank it I felt a difference in my body, I saw an attractive gentleman in the store and thought, wow I’d love to get up in that!” said Woodson


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Jizzy jizz jizz jizz jizz
User avatar
 
Posts: 5251
Joined: 16 Sep 2006
Location: Managing realistic expectations @ SFGreat America
Gender: Male
Age: 27

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby PKI Jizzman » Fri May 12, 2017 9:09 am

I can see the headline tomorrow:

"Man claims Budweiser (not Bud Light) turned him straight"

....

"I got roped into going to a sports-ball game and my boss bought us all a round of beers. I thought it was a cider, but it was really a full calorie Budweiser. Before I knew it, we were in the 9th inning and I was 8 beers deep and bought a Bryce Harper jersey and downloaded Bumble and swiped right on 1,947 women. What is my life now?"
Chi-livin. @adultswim @cartoonnetwork | World traveler, concert attendee, salsa connoisseur, comic reader, and theme park nerd.
Snaps: photoboothezizi

BAYSIDE STATION!!!
User avatar
 
Posts: 23125
Joined: 17 Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver, Canada
Gender: Male
Age: 65

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby Nrthwnd » Fri May 12, 2017 11:01 am

^ :lmao:

But hey - might be worth a try, right?

:cool:
Talk is Cheap :idea: Action is Pricele$$

Image

BAYSIDE STATION!!!
User avatar
 
Posts: 23125
Joined: 17 Aug 2005
Location: Vancouver, Canada
Gender: Male
Age: 65

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby Nrthwnd » Sat Sep 16, 2017 3:40 pm

Is Starbucks selling that "Gay Coffee" still? :Pr
Talk is Cheap :idea: Action is Pricele$$

Image

The only thing better than a naked woman is a naked donkey!
User avatar
 
Posts: 753
Joined: 20 Aug 2017
Location: The Big Guava
Gender: Male
Age: 15

Re: "Man Claims Starbucks Drink Made Him Gay."

Postby Dombot » Sat Sep 16, 2017 4:39 pm

^ :lol: Not in the US at least, it was a one-week only thing. Sad, I actually was in the minority that kinda enjoyed the stuff. Oh well.
1. Intimidator 305 2. Kumba 3. Twisted Timbers 4. Mako 5. Alpengeist

"Sometimes I mistake this for a universe that cares." ~Randall Munroe


Return to Random, Random, Random

Who is online

Users viewing this topic: No registered users and 1 guest

These pages are in no way affiliated with nor endorsed by SeaWorld Parks & Entertainment, Cedar Fair, Legoland, Merlin Entertainment,
Blackstone, Tussaud's Group, Six Flags, Universal Theme Parks, the Walt Disney Company or any other theme park company.

All onride photos and videos on this website were taken with the permission of the park by a professional ride photographer.
For yours  and others safety, please do not attempt to take photos or videos at parks without proper permission.

Disclaimer!  You need a sense of humor to view our site, 
if you don't have a sense of humor, or are easily offended, please turn back now!
Most of the content on this forum is suitable for all ages. HOWEVER!
There may be some content that would be considered rated "PG-13."
Theme Park Review is NOT recommended for ages under 13 years of age.

cron